WEIRD TIDBITS!

I wouldn't read this if I were you, its messed up.

Disclaimer: Nothing here is my own, except for Roxanne and Rochelle.

Hogwarts is out of hand! Two new girls, Rochelle and Roxanne, are two new 5th year Gryffindors- and they are REALLY stirring things up.

It was raining heavily, (the weather that Rochelle and Roxanne both love) (Rochelle objects and says actually Roxanne is the one who loves rain, and Rochelle is the one who loves shoes.) (Roxanne replies that the rain rocks and Roxanne loves shoes just as much as Roxanne does, like those nifty wedges she saw in a catalogue with the green mesh lace…)

Anyways, it was raining heavily, (The weather that Roxanne loves) when the girls pulled up in a carriage. Everything was in slo-mo, they were crying and whimpering. Actually, Roxanne was in slo-mo for no reason, and they were not crying. Roxanne just liked being funky. Rochelle was actually trying to edge away from her. (Just wait till the scene with Roxanne's sugar high)

Finally the stupid slo-mo carriage (don't ask how it went from Roxanne being slo-mo to the carriage being slo-mo) halted to a stop and they got off. Roxanne stepped into the rain and her inner beast was revealed. She stripped off her hoodie, till she was only in a shirt and skirt, and ran down the muddy hill right into the lake where the first years were paddling. Rochelle put on an umbrella, and then cried, "Oh no, Roxanne cant swim!" So she slowly took off her shoes, watch, earrings, necklace, and shoved her hair up in a hat so it wouldn't get wet. Then she dove in. ?

Rochelle reached Roxanne easily, and pulled her from the spot where a first year was bonking her on the head with a paddle because he thought she was the giant squid, at least, that's what he said in court, but Roxanne knew it was on purpose. Then they went to the front doors, and they pulled them open.

When they walked in the whole room went silent, because Rochelle was saying, "Oh yeah, well at least I didn't used to think it was 'Guke, I ate your father!"

"At least I didn't get my tea from my tea-cup underwear!" Roxanne cried. "Oh, don't you pretend you don't know what im talking about!"

"Graham is delivering our Christmas presents this year!" Rochelle whispered, horrified. Roxanne screamed in agony and held the heart shaped scar on her shoulder, which was actually in the shape of a butterfly.
Then they realized that everyone was watching them, and Rochelle blushed then melted into a puddle. Roxanne yelled, "HI EVERYONE!" She waved. "MY NAME IS ROXANNE, AND MY FRIEND IS NAMED ROCHELLE, AND WE READ THE HARRY POTTER SERIES AND DECIDED THAT WE WANTED TO COME HERE, SO WE RODE THE SLO-MO COACH, AND SWAM IN THE LAKE AND STUFF AND THEN WE OPENED THE DOORS AND WE WERE TALKING AND STUFF, AND BY THE WAY WE ARE IN GRYFFINDOR. HI OLD MAN!" she waved at Dumbledore, who raised his eyebrows in a very Cole like manner, which was because Dumbledore was actually Cole, who was all like "oooh, yummy, I like asparagus!"

Then Levin Prawn got up and Roxanne slapped him in the face. Then Professor McGonagall got up and said the girls were to go to get examined to make sure they weren't deatheaters. So they followed this creepy guy who said his name was professor Lupin, and they went and got examined.

"Hello girls," Professor Lupin said.

"Hello professor Poopin." Roxanne and Rochelle chorused. Remus Lupin, who was also Cole, smiled and lifted one eyebrow and made his eyes really big and stuff.

"Are you deatheaters?" He asked. Roxanne and Rochelle chorused;

"No professor Poopin."

"You pass!" Cole cried, and then they went to Gryffindor commonroom where Levin slapped himself and Roxanne kicked him where it hurts and then gave him a charlie horse then he went back to the Slytherin commonroom where he was murdered by Peter Pettigrew.

Somehow Ron, Hermione, Harry, Ginny, and Draco were there waiting for them.

"TOMMY!" Roxanne screamed, and smothered Draco with kisses. He managed to gasp "Who-the-hell-is-Tommy?" Ron smirked and said, "hey, if I were you, I wouldn't be complaining." Then Roxanne kissed Draco more. He pried her off of him, and he chased her all around the castle until she pinned him down and stole his shoe, and then took it back to the commonroom where she hung it on the mantle and prayed to it 5 times a say, 7 days a week. (sometimes she skipped out on prayers and chased him for fun.)

A/N TOM IS SO HOT! Think Draco Malfoy the actor… Tom… sigh