Chapter 20 - Lightning Strikes Twice

"Good lord!"

I stopped in my tracks and glanced up the stairs behind me. Nothing there. There was nothing in front of me, either, so that meant Norrington's reaction could only been caused by me.

"Cover yourself, woman," he ordered. A flicker of annoyance crossed his face. "Of course, you've absconded with my uniform –"

"Stick a sock in it," I told him. What a difference normal clothes made! I felt like myself again. There was no doubt about it. Spandex gave you superpowers. "I'm through wearing those godawful dresses."

"As am I."

We both turned to see Elizabeth come down the stairs wearing what was obviously a spare set of my clothes. Naturally, she filled out the tank top better than I did and even worse, my jeans were big on her.

Norrington's jaw dropped open and he made incoherent sounds.

"Oh, stick a sock in it, James," she scolded, repeating my insult – and it sounded better with the accent -- and then turned to me with a giggle. "These garments are most empowering, Stephanie. I do hope you don't mind that I borrowed them."

That wasn't all she borrowed. In my haste to make sure this was only a storm and nothing more nefarious, I overlooked something very important that Diesel packed for me. Elizabeth was wearing my web belt. I wore the web belt whenever I was going to need more than a convincing argument, which meant rarely, since I hate being in danger. The belt was fully loaded with my pepper spray, my stun gun, my handcuffs and my .38. If Diesel brought all that, it meant I was in more danger than I wanted to know about. "Uh, Elizabeth, can I have my belt?"

"Are these your weapons?" she asked, taking it off. "Is this what you wear when you're tracking your quarry?"

Norrington leaned in for a closer look, reaching tentatively for the stun gun. "I've never seen anything like these."

I took a step back and suddenly understood why Captain Kirk should have obeyed the Prime Directive. "Careful. These are dangerous."

"Then perhaps," Norrington said, dryly, "you should give them to me."

That earned him an eye roll. "Knock it off."

He frowned at the two of us. "To what do I owe this visit, ladies?"

I glanced at Elizabeth. No question about whether she'd been following me. "I talked to Sparrow. He said I'm supposed to keep you out of the way until we get to Death Island."

We both cut our eyes to Elizabeth. She snorted and rolled her eyes at both of us. No doubt about it, she'd been spending way too much time with me. "I suppose I should be kept out of the way as well, then."

"I believe we are all being kept out of the way," Norrington commented. "Nonetheless, we should arrive at our destination in about another hour, unless the weather turns more foul."

Elizabeth turned to me. "Have you thought of a way to get Will back?"

I didn't even have any idea where he was. Before I could answer, there was a loud crash of thunder. We all looked at each other and headed for the stairs.

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By the time we got above, the entire crew was staring skyward. Lightning was flashing across the sky with such frequency there was no doubt that it wasn't natural. Probably that was because we all knew lightning came down from the sky and not the other way around.

Gibbs made the sign of the cross, followed by AnaMaria.

Sparrow made his way over to me. "What do you suppose is going on?"

I shook my head.

"War," Norrington said, softly. "Unlike any you and I have ever seen."

There was another bolt of lightning, this one landing just two feet from where I was standing. When I could see again, I saw a smoking lump.

Diesel.

I made it to his side first. He was alive, but barely conscious. "Diesel –"

His lips moved, but I couldn't make out what he was trying to say.

Just when I figured out he was saying "trap," there was another bolt of lightning and this time, it hit me.

Everything went white. And then it went black.

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"Stephanie."

My head hurt. If it hurt that badly before I opened my eyes, what would it be like if I actually opened them? I decided I didn't want to know and clamped them closed tighter.

"I know you're awake."

And I knew that voice. I was beginning to worry that I'd never hear it again. Even though I knew I'd probably regret it, I opened my eyes. "Lula!"

"It's about time you woke up," she told me.

If my head didn't ache from whatever I'd just gone through, the bright lemon yellow of her outfit would have made my head hurt anyway. She was lemon yellow from the color of her hair to the bright yellow pumps she was wearing. Lula was squeezed into a lemon-colored spandex dress. Never was I so happy to see something that yellow.

Maybe that meant I'd really been hallucinating. There was no Sparrow, no Norrington, no Black Pearl, no ---

"You! I knew you were a menace." Will Turner came up from behind Lula. "I should have known the two of you knew each other."

"You'd be a lot better lookin' if you didn't talk," Lula told him. "Or if you talked nice to people. I like your accent but you're one nasty mother –"

"Lula!" I sat up and looked around. We were in a big, white room with no window and no door that I could see. I couldn't see much, since Lula was right in front of me, blocking my view in all her plus-sized yellow glory. "Is it just us? Is anybody else here?"

Lula stepped aside so I could have a better look.

My jaw dropped.

My Grandma Mazur and my niece, Mary Alice, were sitting with Elizabeth, Sparrow and Norrington on the floor.

Grandma Mazur turned to me and waved. "You've gotta meet this here pirate fellow. He's a real pip!"

There was no doubt about it. We were in trouble.