Disclaimer: I do not own Neon Genesis Evangelion. Evangelion is property of ADV Films, Gainax, and Hideaki Anno. Should they ask, I will remove all traces of this story from public viewing.

I also do not own the band Rammstein, who are property of… themselves, I suppose. Should they ask, I will remove either the story or the lyrics.

Lyrics and translations are provided by Jeremy Williams of Should he ask, I would remove the lyrics from the story. Go visit the website if you're a Rammstein fan—it's good stuff.

"Rosenrot"

Or "Rose-Red"

By CenturyChild533

The rain was pouring hard.

This was the first thought that registered in Asuka Langley Sohryu's mind as Evangelion Unit 02 was hauled up to the surface through the massive catapult. The thought was completely instinctual and seemingly random, but it bore a great deal of meaning to the Second Child. She felt horrible that day, with a combination of things wearing her mind down; the horrible weather was just a representation of her heart at the moment.

It had not been a good day for Asuka. A disappointing and thoroughly embarrassing synchronization test, a rebuke by Rei Ayanami in an elevator, and the usual load of baggage from Shinji and Misato topped the list of things that were making the German girl highly irritable.

And on top of everything else, she was on her period.

Things had only gotten worse when she figured that part out.

The red humanoid moved into position, sliding its arm into the grip of a positron rifle that was mounted inside one of the support towers. Asuka removed it, and the shutter on the tower closed. As she moved the rifle into position, Asuka thought about the importance of what was about to happen. "If I don't get better, they won't let me pilot anymore. I can't afford to screw this up." The targeting computer lowered into place over her head, and she looked at the two crosshairs, waiting for them to align and give her a clear shot at the Angel that was floating in orbit high above the city.

"I'll do this one by myself. I don't need anyone's help."

The crosshairs moved past each other again, and Asuka growled in frustration. "Dammit! Focus!"

The reticule locked on. At the same time, a blinding white light shone down and obscured Asuka's vision. "What in the world…"

She trailed off when she felt the Angel penetrate her mind.

Memories of her past began welling up to the surface, memories that she had tried her hardest to suppress for the past nine years. And she could hear an odd kind of voice in her head as each one played itself out before her eyes, tearing her apart.

Death – her mother committing suicide, leaving her only daughter behind.

Rejection – Kaji, reminding her that, despite all, she was still a child. A fact that she resented.

Loneliness – Shinji, a soul much like her own, had reached out to her so many times, and she had turned him away.

A paradox of emotion. That would be the best way to describe how Asuka saw herself as all of these events returned to her. For as long as she could coherently remember, Asuka had shut herself away from others, offering only the most minimal forms of contact, always keeping people at arm's distance. But now she realized just how much harm she had done herself by shunning her friends and those who could have become friends.

She hated to need… but secretly wished to.

Asuka clutched her head and screamed as more images flew through her mind, a torrent of emotion and suppressed sensations amplified by the Angel as it ravaged her mentally. A mental rape that was stronger than any kind of physical pain. Destruction of the mind and soul, Asuka found, was more painful than destruction of the body.

What was she to do? Did she surrender her impregnability and scream for help as she so badly wanted to? Or did she continue to stand defiant, refusing to back down even if it killed her?

Asuka heard and saw nothing but the madness being thrust upon her by her adversary. One glaring memory uprooted itself, throwing itself into sharp relief. It was from her childhood, at her mother's funeral. An old woman she did not recognize was crying, a handkerchief pressed against her face.

"It's okay, Asuka. Let it all out."

"No. I'm going to think for myself. I don't need to cry."

As the image died away, tears began to fall from the girl's eyes. She made her choice.

"HELP ME!"

( 0 0 0 )

Inside the NERV Inspection Division, covered with reinforced steel and a special mixture of Bakelite, sat the stagnant form of Unit 01. The purple titan was still, its mouth twisted into its usual feral expression that had been frozen into place by the armor and restraints along its form. It had been in this position since its pilot had been ejected from it in a freak accident after the Fourteenth Angel had ravaged the command center and Unit 01 had gone berserk, absorbing the young man in the Entry Plug in the process. The Commander had deemed it necessary that it be quarantined; at the moment, however, the behemoth was the picture of calm.

Its pilot, Shinji Ikari, was less so.

"I'll go!" he screamed, frustrated with the situation. Mere moments ago, Asuka's screams had filled the comm channels, filling Shinji's soul with a sense of desperation. We have to do something. If we don't, she won't last much longer.

"No!" he heard the stern voice of Sub-Commander Fuyutsuki reply. "This Angel attacks the pilot's psyche."

Shinji's father's usual level tone cut in. "We cannot allow Unit 01 to be contaminated. You will remain there."

"All I have to do is avoid getting hit, right?" Shinji replied, his distress perfectly evident in his voice.

"Your success is not guaranteed."

"But at this rate, Asuka will…"

"I don't care," Gendo interrupted. "Rei, go down to Dogma and use the Lance."

Fuyutsuki began to say something, but Shinji cut in.

"Damn you."

Gendo flinched, a gesture that Fuyutsuki found infinitely unnerving. "What did you say to me, Third Child?" His tone was dangerous—razor-edged even. Fuyutsuki had only heard him speak that way to the Committee, and even then he did so very rarely.

By now, the whole of NERV who were present on the bridge were focused on the main view screen, on which the form of Shinji Ikari could be seen, his head lowered and his face shrouded by his tousled mop of brown hair.

"First you left me… then you killed Touji… and now you're going to leave Asuka out there to have her mind destroyed!" Shinji's tone was turning from one of barely contained fury to full-on rage. He raised his head, and his expression astonished the technicians. "I hope you burn in hell for this."

Gendo said nothing. A silence loomed over the command center, broken only by the pained screams of the Second Child. All in that stillness heard her words as she screamed, "HELP ME!"

Shinji sighed and glared coldly at the man with his hands folded, purveying his usual collected tone. Suddenly, Maya reported something unusual.

"Third Child's synchronization ratio is skyrocketing! Approaching 90 synch!"

Fuyutsuki blanched. "How is that possible!"

"Confirmed!" Makoto affirmed. "Synchronization ratio has risen and is holding stable at 93!"

Gendo rose, glaring at the image of his son. "What do you think you are doing?"

Shinji glowered at Gendo with an equally intimidating expression.

"Screw you. I'm going to save her, whether you like it or not."

And with that, he slammed the control yokes forward, shattering the Bakelite prison that Unit 01 was being held in and ripping through the steel bonds like tissue paper.

A girl saw a little rose
It bloomed there in bright heights
She asked her sweetheart
if he could fetch it for her

Unit 01, in a fit of fury, reached towards the doors that led to the catapults, grabbed onto the edges where the sliding portions met, and ripped the massive gateway open, stomping through to the lifts.

Gendo looked to the technicians. "Lock out control of Unit 01 immediately."

Maya typed furiously into her computer. "Negative! The signals are being blocked from inside the Plug! We have no control over Unit 01!"

Gendo twitched again.

Fuyutsuki sighed. "He really is your son, Ikari."

The man glared at Fuyutsuki from behind his glasses before looking to another technician. "How long until Rei reaches the surface?"

"0.7 minutes," Shigeru said. "Unit 01 will be there before Unit 00 reaches the main street-lift."

Unit 01, meanwhile, stepped into one of the elevators and slammed the massive button marked "Emergency Manual Launch." The catapult fired, sending the massive purple form towards the surface, near where Unit 02 was.

"Hold on, Asuka," Shinji said. "I'm coming."

She wants it and that's fine
So it was and so it will always be
She wants it and that's the custom
Whatever she wants, she gets

The shutters opened and the Eva reached the surface. Before it had, however, Shinji unhitched the catches binding Unit 01 to the metal frame and leaped, using the catapult's own momentum to propel the purple giant through the air toward Asuka. He could now clearly see the beam of white light being cast down from the heavens, illuminating the city but focused most of all on the now decrepit form of Unit 02. Shinji landed on the street, putting a good-sized dent into the concrete and running toward the red Evangelion, jumping into the path of the beam of light.

Asuka felt the pain stop abruptly, and she raised her eyes, gazing upon the form of her savior with relief. "Shinji… He came…"

All was well… until Shinji's scream cut through the air like a knife.

"SHINJI! NO!" This came not from Asuka, but rather from Misato, who watched the scene from the view screens. Her panicked tone surprised those around her.

"Mental contamination of the Third Child is beginning!" Makoto shouted. "Contamination spreading at a more accelerated rate now! His mind will be shattered!"

Gendo sat down. "What is the status of Unit 01?"

"No contamination as of yet; the attack is bypassing the Eva's internal systems and affecting the pilot directly."

"Very well. The pilot's condition is secondary; preserving Unit 01 and destroying the Angel are our top priorities."

Misato looked at Gendo, appalled that he would say such a thing. "Sir!"

"Stand down, Major, or I shall have you taken into custody."

Misato clenched her fists but silenced herself.

"How long until Rei reaches the surface?" Gendo continued as if no interruption had taken place.

"The lift has reached the surface now! Preparing to deploy the Lance!" informed Maya. "Unit 00 is in position."

Misato fumed. I can't believe this is happening. Please… please… let this all work out.

She knew the futility of prayer. But at that moment, the woman cared very little.

( 0 0 0 )

Asuka cried.

It was something she did very rarely now, but she could no longer suppress it within herself anymore. She hated seeing Shinji being put through this ordeal; she knew what it felt like and empathized. The recesses of her mind had been shown to her—things that she had forgotten and ignored for so long, they no longer seemed like her memories. A deep well of the mind, opened up, and the clearest thoughts exposed for her to see.

Deep wells must be dug
if you want clear water
Rose-red, oh Rose-red
Deep waters don't run still

As she reflected upon the desperate nature of the circumstances, Asuka felt something—the familiar and frightening sensation that she had experienced before, when the Angel penetrated her mind. But now, it was no longer her own memories she was watching.

It was Shinji's.

She saw everything—his childhood, spent mostly with an uncle who had never warmed to the boy's presence; how the boy had been shunned by his father and forced to leave; and how he had lived his life in constant fear of pain.

And in all of these things… Asuka saw just how similar the two of them were.

Another memory pervaded her senses, filling her mind, eyes, and ears completely. It was of Shinji, sitting at the kitchen table, apologizing. Asuka could see herself in the corner, dressed only in a red towel.

"Stop apologizing! Do you always think you're to blame for everything?"

Asuka remembered that moment, but she felt something different than the irritation that she had felt at the boy's constant apologetic compulsion. This time, as she watched herself act these things out, she felt what Shinji felt: sadness. Her words had hurt him deeply, and now she was beginning to understand why. She had never once done anything to help him, only throwing verbal barbs at him whenever a conversation presented itself.

Yet here he was now, about to sacrifice his mind, his very soul, to save her. How could this be? Why would he do such a thing? It didn't make any sense; Shinji repaid her hatred with kindness.

Shinji felt something for her, and he had for the longest time. She had simply been too blinded by ignorance and her own security to see it.

The boy climbs the mountain in torment
He doesn't really care about the view
Only the little rose is on his mind
He brings it to his sweetheart

How could she have been so blind? She cried even harder now, realizing that Shinji was about to die in the worst possible sense of the word, all because he had loved her. Had he? Yes, Asuka could say with assurance, after seeing his memories, that he had loved her. Shinji had proved that by saving her.

Now, she would be his killer.

She wants it and that's fine
So it was and so it will always be
She wants it and that's the custom
Whatever she wants she gets

Deep wells must be dug
if you want clear water
Rose-red, oh Rose-red
Deep waters don't run still

Asuka heard one of the technicians cry over the radio, "Pilot's mental state is collapsing!"

Another one announced, "Unit 00 is in position. Lance is being deployed."

Asuka blanched. Rei? Rei, the doll, Wonder Girl, was going to have to save her?

No.

Asuka forced Unit 02 to move, gripping Unit 01 around its slender waist and carrying it away from the beam of light. The memories were still flowing past her, but she persisted, and soon, they began to subside somewhat. She hoped beyond hope she wasn't too late to save him.

At his boots, a stone breaks
Doesn't want to be on the cliff anymore
And a scream lets everyone know
Both are falling to the ground

She wants it and that's fine
So it was and so it will always be
She wants it and that's the custom
Whatever she wants she gets

Abruptly, the flashes stopped. Asuka heard a technician say something about the Angel being destroyed, but she was too worried to care. She shouted into the radio, "What about Shinji? Is he alright?"

"Scanning…" Asuka recognized the voice of Ritsuko Akagi. "His mental wavelength is completely fried. There's no telling what kind of shape he's in. We'll have to wait until he regains consciousness."

Asuka paled. No… Shinji, please don't do this to me… not now, not when I finally understand everything…

Deep wells must be dug
if you want clear water
Rose-red, oh Rose-red
Deep waters don't run still

And truthfully, she did understand. Shinji had wanted the rose of her love… and had torn himself apart with the thorns.

( 0 0 0 )

Misato hated hospitals; the cold, white sterility of the places was disconcerting, a feeling one should not associate with such a place. She had seen enough of hospitals from her days of trauma after Second Impact and had grown to loathe the atmosphere of sickness and despair that hung in the air like a thick fog. Now the woman once again found herself in the Cranial Nerve Unit of the NERV hospital, seated on a bench outside the room that Shinji was in. Asuka was next to her, silent, as she had been for the past few hours. Misato could understand her silence; the events of the Angel's attack must have been traumatic for her. Coupled with her worry for Shinji, who remained unconscious inside the hospital room, Asuka was a mess.

"I know this probably isn't the best time to tell you this," Misato said, regretting that she had to be the one to tell Asuka his news, "but once Shinji wakes up, the Commander wants to see the both of you."

Asuka yielded no response, staring blankly out of the window, which poured sunlight into the hallway. The white light only served to harshly accentuate the unfeeling aura of the place.

The door opened, and a nurse exited the room. "Major?" she said, looking to Misato.

Misato stood. "Is he alright?"

The nurse pushed her glasses back up on her nose, looking at the clipboard she had in her hands. "Physically, he's fine; no broken bones or internal bleeding. Mentally, though, I can't even begin to calculate the extent of the damage. I ran a thorough scan of every mental pattern I could track, and certain portions of his brain are completely inert."

Misato frowned visibly. "What does that mean?"

"It means," the nurse went on, visibly afraid of how Misato would react to this news, "that there's a good possibility that… Shinji might not wake up at all. And if he does, there's no telling how different he'll be due to the widespread damage."

For the first time since she had been removed from her Entry Plug, Asuka spoke. "When can I see him?"

The nurse turned her attention to the Second Child. "We've just finished running the tests, actually. You can see him now, if you'd like."

Asuka looked at Misato uncertainly. "Go on ahead," the purple-haired woman assured her. "I'll go in later."

The German nodded and strode past her guardian and the nurse, proceeding into the room slowly, hesitant of what she might find within. Shinji lay on the bed facing upward toward the ceiling, his eyes closed and his face lacking any kind of emotion. The void expression was enough to cause a small shudder to run down Asuka's spine. So many times, she had seen him with a smile on his face, despite whatever the circumstances were at the time.

It served as a callous reminder to her that nothing was constant. Anything could change.

She hated change.

Asuka reached the bedside, looking upon Shinji's stoic face, her heart beginning to ache. He might never wake up, she thought, a tear threatening to fall before she blinked it away. He could be like this forever… and it's all my fault. The German girl cursed herself, damning herself for her own weakness. All because I needed help. I wasn't strong enough, and he sacrificed himself for me.

Asuka clenched her fists. I'd have rather died.

She then relaxed, trying to regain her composure. "Shinji… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Asuka said nothing more, for if she had, she feared that her long dormant tears might finally fall. She sat in the chair next to the bed, determined to wait everything out.

It would not be long before the wait was over.

( 0 0 0 )

When Asuka next opened her eyes, the bright light of the afternoon sun had gone, replaced by the elegant luminescence of dusk, hazes of purple and red flowing into the room. I must have dozed off, she thought, stretching and rubbing her eyes tiredly. "Ah shit," Asuka grumbled angrily, rubbing a spot on her lower back. "I got a cramp from this stupid chair."

"I'm sorry," a soft voice replied.

Wait, Asuka thought. I know that voice…

Sure enough, as she turned to face the hospital bed, Asuka saw Shinji, wide-awake and sitting up, looking at her.

"Shinji!" she practically screamed, clamping the Japanese boy into a tight hug.

"Who?"

With that one simple word, Asuka's entire world shattered.

Dear God, she thought. It can't be…

"You mean… you don't remember your name?"

"No," Shinji said bewilderedly. "Why, should I?"

Asuka felt like she had been slapped. Amnesia… He has amnesia… What am I going to do? This is my fault. This is my fault. For once in her life, Asuka Langley Sohryu panicked. How am I gonna tell Misato? Will he ever get his memory back? Before she could think more fully on these questions, the door opened, and a man in a black suit and sunglasses entered the room. Asuka assumed he was from Section 2, NERV's investigation and protection division.

"Come with me. Commander Ikari wishes to speak with the two of you."

Shinji looked at Asuka as if for guidance. She said nothing, but merely helped escort him out of the room. They followed the agent down the hallways toward Gendo's office. The labyrinth of corridors was familiar to Asuka, but as she watched Shinji looking amazedly at the place as though seeing it for the first time, Asuka was pained by the display of childish fascination and innocence. How much is he going to have to relearn?

"So," Asuka said to the man in the suit, "what does the Commander want us for, anyway?"

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but I don't know. He didn't say."

"Shit," Asuka swore, frustrated with the smoke-and-mirrors involved with working at NERV.

She felt Shinji tap her on the shoulder. "So who is this Commander guy, anyway? And what does he want with me?"

"The Commander runs NERV – that's the organization that you work for. He also happens to be your dad."

"Oh, I see. By the way, you said my name was Shinji, right?" he asked, switching trains rather abruptly.

"Yes. Your name is Shinji Ikari."

A pause ensued. "What the hell kind of a name is that?" Shinji said.

Asuka snorted in an unexpected fit of laughter. She mentally reprimanded herself, telling herself that it wasn't funny. Her chastising was interrupted as the Section 2 agent escorted them through a large set of double doors and into the office of Gendo Ikari.

The office's lights were dimmed as usual, most of it being focused at two points: Gendo's glasses and a circle in the floor, one of the pieces of the Tree of Life diagram that had been etched into the ceiling and floor of the long room. The man in question sat at the far end of the chamber, his hands folded in front of his face in his usual stare-down mode. Asuka had only seen him do it a handful of times, and it still held its effect. Shinji, on the other hand, was less affected.

"Damn, who's the gargoyle down there?"

Gendo's eyes widened, though his glasses obscured the duo's view of his face.

Wincing slightly and fearing the repercussions of the remark (which she had found hilarious), Asuka said, "That would be your father, Shinji."

"Really?" Shinji squinted down the room and looked at him. "Hi, Dad."

"Second Child," Gendo said in his cold and unwavering tone, "could you please provide me an explanation as to what the hell is wrong with the Third Child?"

"He has amnesia because of what happened out there! What did you think it was, a headache?"

"Mind your tongue. You are speaking to a superior officer." The deadly seriousness of Gendo's voice told Asuka that he meant business. Today had most definitely not been a good one for either Asuka or the Commander.

"Now," Gendo went on, "we must discuss the charges that are to be brought up against…"

"Charges?" Asuka interrupted. "What do you mean 'charges'?"

Gendo was becoming irritated by the way the day was turning out. He glared at Asuka, his eyes shimmering with carefully concealed rage. "Insubordination, disregard of a direct order, destruction of NERV property, risking the destruction of an Evangelion Unit… need I go on?"

"What? I didn't do any of those things!"

"Not you," Gendo said, pointing at Shinji, who was twiddling him thumbs and glancing around the room idly. "The Third Child is the subject in question."

Of course, Asuka thought. I should have guessed. He did all that to make it to the surface, didn't he? "But how can you hold him at fault for that?"

Gendo looked at a file folder on his desk. "The damage caused by the Third Child's 'rescue mission' totaled up to enough to bankrupt several Third World nations. I expect him to be held liable for every penny."

"How could you do that! He doesn't even remember his own name, for God's sake!"

"It is irrelevant."

Shinji looked at Asuka. "Is he usually this much of an asshole?"

Gendo snapped. "Hold your tongue, or I'll cut it out!"

Shinji looked at him. "You need to shave, Dad. You're looking a little rough around the edges."

The bearded man fumed, slamming his hands down on his desk irritably. "Second Child, I suggest you do something about him immediately, before I take matters into my own hands."

"Fine. On one condition."

Gendo's eyebrow twitched, a gesture lending itself further to the extent of his irritation. "I do not think you are in any kind of position to be bargaining, Second Child."

"I'll keep him out of your hair," Asuka said, "if you drop charges and the liability for the damages." She smiled, knowing that sooner or later, he was bound to snap.

"No."

She looked at Shinji. "I guess I'll just leave him in here, then. Maybe you two could have a bit of a father/son… chat." She grinned wickedly, exposing a row of pearly white teeth twisted into a demented smile.

Gendo seethed. "Fine. Get out."

As Asuka led Shinji out of the office, she looked at Gendo with a gaze that mimicked his own heartless visage from no more than a few moments ago. "Now I know why he hated you so much."

As she closed the office door, Gendo found himself wondering if a single bullet would be enough to kill him.

( 0 0 0 )

As Shinji and Asuka exited the office, Misato took notice of Shinji's presence and began berating the redhead with questions. Before Asuka could get a word in edgewise, Shinji looked at Asuka strangely. "Who's this?" In a surprising moment of clarity, Misato understood what was going on.

"He doesn't remember me?"

"He doesn't remember much of anything, actually," Asuka elaborated. "Not even something as simple as his own name. He was about to drive the Commander up the wall just now." While she felt that giving Gendo a bit of payback was justified, Asuka had to keep reminding herself of the seriousness of Shinji's plight. Now that Misato knows… no. I have to be the one to help him. I can't trust anyone else with something this important.

"So how are we going to get his memory back?" Misato asked.

"I don't know. You think I've done this before or something?" Asuka scratched her chin thoughtfully. "Maybe we could ask Dr. Akagi; she'll probably know something helpful."

"Good idea," Misato said. The trio then began their trek towards Ritsuko's office.

"Who is she?" asked Shinji, restating his earlier question, which had gone unanswered.

"Oh, sorry, I forgot to tell you. Misato's our guardian; we live with her in her apartment."

"Huh. Nifty," Shinji said, making a face that eerily reminded Asuka of Shinji's friend Kensuke Aida. It was enough to make Asuka somewhat jealous of her guardian, a feeling that made Asuka sick to her stomach. So early, and I'm already losing.

It was odd, however, that Shinji's expression only lasted the barest second before he returned to taking in his environment with abandon. This alleviated Asuka's uneasiness. I'm being paranoid, she thought, kicking herself mentally.

"And what's your name?" Shinji cut into her thoughts without warning. "I didn't get to ask earlier."

"Oh. I'm Asuka Langley Sohryu. I'm your roommate, and…" Asuka stopped. This is my chance to make up for everything – a fresh start to our relationship. Or what passed for one, anyway.

Shinji looked at her expectantly, awaiting the conclusion of her thought.

Asuka smiled. "I'm a friend."

The three of them knocked on the door of Ritsuko's office. The blonde woman noticed Shinji first. "So, he's awake after all."

Misato scowled. "You make it sound like you weren't expecting it."

"I wasn't," Ritsuko said matter-of-factly. "I assume you need help of some kind with his rehabilitation?"

"How do you reverse amnesia?" Asuka said, her patience fading and her dislike of Akagi beginning to intensify.

"Amnesia? Is that what happened to him?"

Asuka and Misato nodded. Shinji sniffed the air curiously. "I smell cigarettes. Anyone else smell cigarettes?"

Ritsuko rolled her eyes and sighed. "Emotional stimuli are often effective – that is, you have to show him things that will provoke his feelings. Try and get him back into his usual routine."

"Doesn't sound too hard," Asuka said. "He gets pretty emotional over everything."

"But try not to expose him to things too quickly. Overexposure can often be harmful to the psyche and cause even further damage to his memories."

Asuka nodded. "I'll be careful."

"Are we allowed to take him home?" Misato said, that motherly tone infiltrating her voice, as it sometimes did.

"Yes, I don't see why not. Just remember what I said about exposing him to things slowly," the doctor warned. She then retreated back into her office.

"Okay," said Misato. "I guess we'd better get going."

"Oh crap!" Asuka exclaimed. When the others looked at her perplexedly, she explained, "Misato has to drive us home!"

The purple-haired woman fumed. "And just what is that supposed to mean!"

"You're gonna traumatize Shinji! That's what I mean!"

"Why you…"

As the fight began, neither one of them noticed Shinji laughing heartily as he watched them bicker.

( 0 0 0 )

The evening progressed rather uneventfully after Shinji had been shown into the apartment. He had not managed to recover anything, which had disappointed Misato and Asuka, but he had found, however, that he liked Pen-Pen. That meeting had been rather fun to watch. Shinji had at first been surprised by the penguin's presence (the resulting exclamation was loud and had caused a noise complaint to be filed), but the boy had eventually come to terms with Pen-Pen and was now vastly amused by the warm-water penguin.

After dinner – which Asuka had made, much to Misato's surprise – Shinji had sat on the couch at the redhead's insistence and then watched her as she did the dishes. They had spoken very little, and Shinji did not seem to be recalling anything. She finished the dishes and came into the living room, taking a seat on the couch next to him, but not so close as to make him uncomfortable.

His eyes widened suddenly, something awakening from within the dormant recesses of his mind. "I think… I remember something."

"What do you remember?" Asuka babbled excitedly, scrambling over to him.

"It's fuzzy, but… I remember being here with you, in this room. It must have been for a long time. I remember… music? Yes, music… and dancing in synch? What's all that about?"

Asuka remembered what he was talking about. "The Seventh Angel training. Yeah, we had to move in synch to beat that one."

"Angels?"

Asuka tried her best with this matter, explaining everything she could about the Angels, the Evangelions, and NERV. As she was talking, Shinji began to recall small snippets of the events.

A girl with blue hair, smiling at him.

Dancing to the beat of the music, fighting the monster's two components.

Catching the falling Angel while Asuka stabbed the core.

Although they were merely fragments, it was a start to what the boy hoped would be many more. This girl Asuka… he could remember something about her. One of his memories suddenly made him laugh.

"What's so funny?" Asuka asked.

"Did you kiss me once?"

Asuka remembered that moment and blushed. "Yeah, I did."

"Why were you holding my nose?"

"Your breath was tickling me!" Her blush intensified.

"And so you tried to asphyxiate me?" Shinji retorted playfully.

"Oh, shut up!" She folded her arms. "Idiot," she muttered under her breath.

Shinji chuckled and leaned back, looking up at the ceiling.

Asuka, for her own part, was glad that Shinji was behaving this way. I've always wondered what he'd be like if he loosened up a little. Maybe this is what he could have turned out to be, if his life wasn't so fucked up.

As intriguing as this was, however, it did make Asuka wonder about another possibility. What if he gets his memory back and goes back to being his old self? The thought stirred up mixed emotions in the Second Child; she wanted Shinji to regain his memories, but she feared what would happen when or if he did. He might remember what happened and hate me for it. Or he might go back to being his old self and draw away from me again…

Asuka mentally shook herself and fell unceremoniously back to reality. I can't keep worrying about the possibilities, she though determinedly. All I can do is do the right thing and hope for the best.

She saw Shinji yawn out of the corner of her eye. "Tired?" Asuka inquired.

"Yeah. Where do I sleep?"

"Here, I'll take you to your room." She stood from the couch, but he stopped her by catching hold of her wrist gently.

"Wait. There was something I wanted to ask you, before I forget."

"What is it?"

"How do I feel about you?"

To say that Asuka was surprised would be a massive understatement. "W-What do you mean?" she stuttered. This had been the part she was afraid of: telling him the truth of what had happened and, more importantly, why it had happened.

"It's kind of hard to explain, but I get this weird feeling when I look at you, like a feeling I can't quite grasp," Shinji said, and Asuka could tell he was having a hard time comprehending the sensation. "A sense of an emotion maybe, that I may have felt but I can't remember. I thought you might know something about it."

Asuka grappled with her conscience for a moment, battling back and forth between telling the truth and lying. Finally, she replied, "I'm not really the one who should tell you that, Shinji. That's something you have to remember on your own."

Shinji looked at her skeptically. "Kind of a half-assed answer, don't you think?" His cobalt eyes penetrated hers, searching for the answer that the redhead seemed reluctant to divulge.

"I'm sorry," Asuka apologized, looking down at her feet. "I just think that's one thing you're better off finding out on your own. It's… complicated."

Shinji stood from his position on the couch and walked over to Asuka. She could feel his eyes on her, taking in every detail of her posture and the way that she acted. Then he did something rather uncharacteristic.

He hugged her. "Thank you," he whispered.

Asuka's eyes widened. "For what?"

"Helping me out today. You stuck up for me in that office, you helped me start getting my memory back… and you made me dinner." This prompted a laugh from both teenagers, but Asuka's smile faded quickly.

"But… I mean, after what I did…"

Shinji interrupted her. "Whatever you did, I'm sure it can't be that bad." He smiled, and Asuka felt her mental burden lessen considerably. "Now," Shinji said as he released Asuka, "where's my room?"

"This way, I'll show you." She led him down the hall and toward her room, wondering again if she was up to the task of regaining Shinji's memory. Granted, Asuka was willing to do what she could to help, but would it be enough? I don't guess there's any way to tell, she thought. She opened the door to Shinji's room. "Here it is."

Shinji entered the room slowly, his eyes wandering over every detail they could reach. He turned in a circle and then collapsed onto the bed, unknowingly in the same pose he had been in on many other previous nights. Asuka watched with mute interest before he said something to break the silence.

"An unfamiliar ceiling…"

What that meant exactly, Asuka wasn't sure. It must have been of some significance to Shinji, and that was what mattered the most. Asuka drew open the drawer on the nightstand, extracting a small, black rectangular object. "Maybe this'll help."

Shinji raised his head from the pillow curiously. "What is it?"

"Your SDAT player," she replied, handing him the tape device and his earbuds. "You're always listening to it—I figure it might help bring something back."

The young man turned the object over in his hands before plugging the earbuds into his ears. "Thanks, Asuka."

She smiled. "Good night, Shinji."

" 'Night, Asuka." He once again reclined, pushing the play button as his head hit the pillows with a dull thump.

As she slid the door shut behind her, Asuka thought over the day and its events. It's been a long day for everyone, I guess, she mused, opening the door to her own bedroom and collapsing onto her futon, too tired to even change out of her school uniform.

"Don't worry, Shinji," she whispered as she drifted off to sleep. "We'll get your memories back… together." Her eyes closed, and sleep came to her instantly.

But it was anything but restful. That night, Asuka's dreams were filled with fear, images of blood and rose petals dancing through her mind as she remembered a lyric from a story she had heard as a child…

Snowy White and Rosy Red,

Will you beat your lover dead?

And over all, she could see her Eva, Unit 02, being tortured by the Angel's psychic attack, the armor glittering in the ethereal light of the beam.

Rose-red… the color of Unit 02… and of blood.

TO BE CONTINUED

Author's Notes: Well that was kind of random, huh? I had this idea as I was listening to Rammstein's new album Rosenrot. The song is about a young woman who sees a beautiful red rose, and she asks her lover to fetch it for her. He dies in the process, with no other thought than pleasing his beloved. I started toying with ideas for an angsty Shinji-Asuka story, and it kind of mutated into this. For those of you who are thinking, "But Shinji didn't die!" consider this: death doesn't have to be physical, as the line in the story itself suggests. Some things are much more painful.

Pre-reading credit goes to Scout and That Other Guy. Check out his author page; he's got some new stuff up that I think you all will enjoy (especially if you enjoyed this).

No telling when the next chapter of this will come up. Please have patience with me. Please?