English is not my native language and I'm still looking for a beta reader, so if there are spelling or grammar mistakes… I'm sorry! But if you want to apply for the job as my beta reader… Be my guest!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own the characters of "Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman"… One Beth Sullivan does… But I do own the character of Jonas "John" Kerrigan!

Rating: I don't know anything about these ratings, but let's say T or PG-13. Just to be safe...

Warnings: This is NOT a very happy story! So, don't like… don't read... This story is the sequel to "Past Fears". If you haven't read that story I suggest you do that first. Otherwise this story won't make a lot of sense… I think…

Summary: Hank and Sully are traveling to Denver to make sure Zack is safe from John Kerrigan. But will Zack really be safe?

First of all, I'd like to apologize to everyone who was shocked by the previous chapter. I've thought long about how I wanted the story to evolve and finally I decided that I wanted to write something different. Of course, I could have let Hank and Sully save the day… and everyone lived happily ever after… that kind of stuff, but I'm sorry, that's just not my style. These kinds of stories have been done a million times. I just wanted to write something different… well… at least I hope it's a bit different. Anyway, I hope I haven't scared off too many readers! A special thank you to everyone who reviewed. It's good to know that there are at least five people who will continue reading my story! I love you! Well, on tot the next chapter…

Chapter 7

Hank sat at a table in the back of his saloon. He stared at the table, so it appeared, but he didn't really saw anything. It had been ten days since Zack's death; his funeral was exactly a week ago. He didn't remember much of the last 10 days. The only thing that was very clear to him was that his son had been murdered by John Kerrigan and that he would never get him back. He felt numb. He had been feeling that way for over a week now. He couldn't cry anymore, he didn't feel like talking, in fact, he couldn't care less about anything anymore. He remembered that Elena and Sully had tried to talk to him. That he couldn't just give up on his own life, that he couldn't let John win. It hadn't impressed him; he just didn't care anymore…

Elena had traveled back with them to Colorado Springs. She couldn't leave Hank alone, so she decided to be there for him and to take care of him. It's a good thing that she did, because Hank had lost all interest in his own life and his business. He only ate or drank something when Elena told him to. She was the one who kept his business running, with a little help from Jake and Matthew. However, the worst thing was, she thought, that Hank didn't speak to anyone anymore. No matter what she asked him or what she said to him, he never answered. He just sat there at the table, staring at something (or nothing)… Several had tried, Sully, Jake, Michaela, even Grace had tried to get through to him, but he never moved, never spoke…

He remembered the last time he had spoken. It had been on the day of Zack's funeral. The reverend had said some beautiful things during the service. The words had even made him cry a little. Afterwards everyone could get something to drink and eat at Grace's Café. He didn't want to go there but Elena had told him it would be the least he could do for those who had supported him the last few days. So he had gone there, accepting everyone's condolences, drinking some coffee… He had felt terrible! Everyone told him how sorry they were and that if there was anything they could do, they would be there for him. It never made him feel better, in fact, he felt worse by the minute. Then Horace had approached him. "I… I don't really know what to say…" he had said softly, "but everything will be alright… you'll see!" The words had cut through Hank's heart like a knife. "How dare ya…" Hank had answered in a low voice. "How dare ya say that everything will be alright…" he had continued, his blood boiling with anger. "My son is dead, Horace! Dead! Slaughtered! It will never be alright! Never again!" He had yelled at Horace, cursed him in every way he knew. If Sully hadn't stopped him, he would have knocked Horace down. "Let go of me!" he had yelled at Sully. Then he had turned around and left. "Leave me alone…" had been his last words…

Of course Horace had meant well, it just hadn't come out right… has it ever? Hank never liked Horace, though he knew the man meant well. It had just hurt his ego when Myra left him, the toughest guy in town, for Horace, the biggest geek in town. But right now, even that particular little fact couldn't bother him anymore. It didn't matter anymore… NOTHING mattered anymore…

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Elena was serving some drinks when Sully walked into the saloon. "Hey Sully!" she greeted him. He gave her a little nod and looked over at Hank who was still sitting at a table in the back, alone. "Still no change?" he asked Elena. She shook her head sadly. "No, he seems to have lost all interest…" Sully sighed. "He doesn't even seem to care about his saloon anymore," he said softly. "I try to get through to him every day… it's like he doesn't hear me anymore," Elena said as she walked to an empty table and sat down at it. She looked tired and sad. "Are you sure ya can handle this?" Sully asked concerned, "Ya look tired…" She smiled. "I'm fine," she said, "Jake and Matthew help me from time to time… And believe me, it's not the saloon that makes me tired…" she looked over at Hank and shook her head again. "I don't know what to do with him anymore…"

Sully looked at her, and then he looked back at Hank. He thought long before saying: "Have ya tried the hard approach yet?" He looked back at Elena who gave him a questioning look. "What do you mean?" she asked him. "Well, obviously just talking to him doesn't work, so maybe we have to approach him differently…" Sully said softly. Elena looked at him in shock. "You don't want to use violence on him, do you?" she asked, almost angrily. "Of course not," Sully answered, "well, not much anyway… The point is, Elena, he has to snap out of this. He can't go on like this for the rest of his life! Then John will definitely have won…" Elena listened to Sully's words and nodded. "You are right," she said, "but I can't hurt him… What's your plan anyway?" Sully looked briefly at Hank again. "Well, I used to be like him… once upon a time," Sully started, "when I lost my wife and daughter… I didn't care about anything either… until someone decided that I needed to open my eyes en get on with my life again… He showed me the hard way… If someone doesn't want to listen… maybe you have to make him feel…"

They were both quiet for a while. "You're not going to hurt him real bad, are you?" Elena asked worriedly. Sully smiled. "Not physically," he said, "but he won't like what I'm going to say to him." He looked around. There weren't too many people around, but still, he'd rather approach Hank in an empty saloon. "Can ya get rid of these people for a little while?" he asked Elena. She smiled. "Non problemo," she answered and clapped her hands. "I'm sorry gentlemen, but we are closing up for an hour or so… I promise if you all leave nicely you'll get a free drink when you get back…" she gave the men her loveliest smile and to Sully's surprise everyone got up and left without making any fuss. "You're good," he said. "I know," she said cheekily, "Now you show me how good you are… I want my man back." Sully nodded at her. "This can get ugly, you know," he said softly. "I know," she answered but she had no intention to leave.

Sully looked at the quiet, sad man in the back of the saloon. He took a deep breath before finally approaching him. He sat down opposite Hank and looked him in the eyes. "Hey Hank," he said but there was no reply. He was quiet for a moment, thinking about how he should continue. He didn't really want to hurt Hank, but the man couldn't sit at this table for the rest of his life, could he? He still had a life to live, with a beautiful young woman. "Don't you get tired of sitting here Hank?" Again there was no answer. "Guess not," Sully said, more to himself. "I wonder what Zack would say if he saw you like this," Sully continued. He watched Hank closely; hoping to see some movement in his eyes, some change in his features… there wasn't any. Damn it Hank, Sully thought, don't make me do this… "I think he would be embarrassed to see his father like this," he said as he moved closer to Hank. He never lost eye contact. "Sitting here, all alone, every damn day, feeling sorry for himself… While he could live a life, a life Zack can't live anymore…" Sully knew he was on thin ice here, but he had to get Hank out of his trance. As he spoke he saw Hank clenching his fists… he knew he had hit a nerve… Come on Hank, snap out of it… "Are you feeling guilty, Hank? You think his death was your fault, don't ya?" Sully saw that Hank's temper was rising. Yes! Go on… get angry, get mad… let it out! "Of course it was your fault Hank! The man who killed him was your stepfather! If you hadn't known him, he would never have gotten to Zack! If you hadn't gone out to dinner with Elena, he would never have had the chance to grab Zack! Then Zack would never have been taken to these dark woods… would never have felt scared and most importantly, John would never have been able to cut his throat… It must hurt to know that YOU are, in fact, responsible for your son's death… Zack probably knows that too now… He must hate you so much… He…"

Sully didn't get the chance to finish his sentence. Elena had already seen it coming. Hank grabbed the table and shoved it into Sully's chest as hard as he could. The impact made Sully loose his balance and he fell on the ground. "SHUT UP!" Hank roared. "SHUT THE HELL UP!" he grabbed Sully by the collar and dragged him from the floor to the wall. With all his strength he pulled Sully back to his feet and pushed him against the wall. "Don't ya EVER speak that way about my boy again! I swear to God, I kill ya where ya stand!" His eyes shot daggers at Sully, but Sully wasn't impressed. "Does it make ya feel better, Hank?" he yelled back at him. "Do you really think that Zack would want you to waste your life like this?" he pushed Hank away from him. "Shut up!" Hank yelled back. "No I won't!" Sully said. "You are letting John win! He killed Zack for his own revenge… to ruin YOU! You are letting him succeed! Is that what ya want? I'm pretty sure that it's NOT what Zack would have wanted!" Hank looked at him dangerously. "I'm warning ya Sully… Don't ya even dare say his name!" Sully, however, continued. "You still have so much to live for! Don't throw that away… Zack's death would have been for nothing if you throw it all away!" Sully never saw it coming. Before he knew it Hank's fist connected with his eye and he was out on the floor. "Sully!" Elena called out and hurried to the man who was lying out cold on the floor. Hank looked at them. He was quiet again. He looked miserable; it was as if his mind had finally caught up with him and his actions… "I'm sorry," he said quietly before rushing out of the saloon. "Hank!" Elena called after him, but it was too late.

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It took Sully a few minutes to get rid of the dizziness, but he finally was able to get back on his feet again. "Here's some ice," Elena said and handed him towel filled with ice. "Ow…" he muttered as he put it on his eye. "Hurts, huh?" Elena said with a grin. Sully laughed at her. "Well, at least it got him to talk again," he said. Elena shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, and to run off to God knows where… It's not making me feel any better…" she said softly. Sully was about to answer when the door opened. Jake entered the saloon. "Hey Jake!" Elena called to him. "Hey…" he answered, "Uh… I don't know whether you've noticed… but Hank took off... he got onto a horse and rode away like a madman." Elena sighed. "Yes, we know," she answered miserably. "Well, shouldn't we go after him?" Jake continued, "because the way he looked when he got onto that horse… I'm afraid he might do something to himself!" Elena turned to Sully with a panicked look on her face. "Oh no…" Sully said, "It's my fault… I shouldn't have said…" he didn't finish his sentence. Jake however was curious now. He also noticed Sully's eye and figured that there must have been a fight between Sully and Hank. "What the hell did you say to him?" he asked Sully, anger obvious in his voice. "It doesn't matter now," Sully said, "We have to find him… and fast!" Although Jake was still curious to know what had happened between Hank and Sully, he decided that it could wait… the wellbeing of his friend was more important right now. "I'll get a search party together," he said and walked out of the saloon. "Elena," Sully said, "I want you to warn Dr. Mike!" Elena nodded as Sully was walking towards the door. "Wait! What are you going to do?" she asked Sully. "Trying to find Hank," he answered, "I hope I'll find him before the search party does…" Elena nodded again. "Good luck!" she called after him. I have the feeling you're going to need it…

TBC

I'm sorry it took so long! I hope you still like it! Please let me know…