Disclaimer see Chapter 1

A/N: Text in italics represents flashbacks.

"Ijkar the fourth will see you know. I shall lead you to the meeting room. May I once again express how sorry I am that such an incident has occurred while you were our guests."

Yraj, the royal aide, greeted the Atlantian delegation that was assembled in the palatial entrance hall.

"What we need aren't apologies, we need permission to search for our people. Two days and you have nothing but words. It took you two days just to get as an appointment with your leader. In the meantime we had to make due with a useless diplomat." Rodney ranted.

"Rodney. It's not helping." Elizabeth warned as they climbed up a stairwell, following Yraj.

Rodney had been particularly tense since the terrorist attack on the ministry of foreign affairs on Yamin. Atlantis had been in negotiations with Ymanhin people for almost six months and a vital alliance had started to develop. All the more disturbing was the fact that in the attack two days ago, Major Sheppard and Dr. Beckett had kidnapped. Numerous Ymanhin had been wounded or killed. The current negotiations had been especially important; the Atlantians had the prospect of acquiring a nearly fully charged ZPM from the Ymanhin. Of course, a ZPM didn't come cheap and the negotiation had been going for ten days already. The Ymanhin were not interested in material goods, they had made it clear, and that they would only accept knowledge and technology in exchange for the ZMP, so John, Rodney and Carson had been along to evaluate any demands that were made.

When the group reached the meeting room, Ijkar was already waiting for them. Yraj took a seat in a corner of the room.

"Please seat down." Ijkar motioned to the couch-like seating arrangements.

"It is unfortunate that we have to meet under such circumstances. I have asked my capable representative Wam Vter to join as at a later time. He told me that he had the feeling that you were not satisfied by how he was handling the situation. I felt it was in order to speak to you personally. The continuation of our alliance is a matter close to my heart."

"We too wish to continue relations with your people. Especially the negotiations to acquire a ZPM device are very important to our people and I would hope to see them continued."

"As you wish, as soon as Wam Vter gets here, you can schedule a date for the negotiations to be resumed."

"What is being done to find Major Sheppard and Dr. Beckett? Do you know whether they are still alive?" Rodney asked impatiently. He didn't care about the negotiations right now.

"Well, you know what happened. We think that the attack was committed by a group called Denebria, last known to be led by a man named Turan. But we don't know much more. We have a man on the inside, but he hasn't contacted as in a while. We have to wait. The military is checking preparing to hike the mountains in North Kintarin as we speak. The group is know to have hiding places there. We will find them."

But it might be too late for John and Carson, Rodney added mentally. Who knew what they were doing to them. They could be dead already. The though made his stomach clench.

"Another reason I have asked you here, is that I wish to officially apologise in the name of my people. The members of Denebria are xenophobic extremist and it cast a shadow on all of us that we have allowed a minority to commit such destructive actions. In the name of all of Ymanhin, I apologize for the damage cause to you and your people and promise that I will do everything to bring those responsible to justice. An official apology will appear in all major papers tomorrow and will be broadcast on the media tonight." the leader promised.

"Thank you." Elizabeth said stiffly.

"I will keep you up to date on the progress of our investigation into the matter of the attack."

Rodney folded the last of his shirts and put it into his pack. His hands trembled as he closed his pack. The last two days were catching up with him now. He had been living in a daze since the terrorist attack.

"We shall break for now and resume our talk in an hour." Wam Vter, the Ymanhin liaison announced.

Everyone present nodded in agreement. It had been a long morning. The Ymanhin started their business talks at sunset. Rodney got up from his seat and stretched his muscles. After six hours of sitting his muscles felt stiff. He joined John by the window. As enjoyable as they view of Fiatyn, the capital city of South Kintarin was, Rodney couldn't wait to get back to Atlantis. Ten days of twelve hours a day of negotiations had been exhausting in a way that he hadn't anticipated.

"Makes a miss the ocean, doesn't it?" John turned to Rodney.

Before Rodney could reply, thunder exploded, deafening him and the ground shook. The large windows John and Rodney had just been standing at shattered into thousands of tiny pieces raining down on them. Rodney's ears were still ringing when the ground vibrated again. Like in a bizarre dream, he saw the door to the conference room fall out of the frame in slow motion. Two masked men stormed in, brandished guns. Rodney could hear their angry voices, but didn't understand what they were saying. Everything was distorted, like it was a movie being played at the wrong speed. Someone grabbed him and pulled him down flat to the ground just before gunshots started ringing out. Somewhere an alarm went off and and water started spraying down on them. More shouts followed.

"Get up! Hurry up if you want to live! Only the aliens, the traitors stay. Don't move!" One of the masked men shouted.

Rodney's head was spinning; he had troubled processing all that was happening at once. John had a firm grab on his arm and helping him to his feet.

"Faster!" The man yelled angrily and fired a shot with his gun to underline his point. In front of Rodney and John, Elizabeth and Carson were stumbling towards the remnants of the door, one of the gunmen behind them.

Rodney staggered ahead towards the door. If it had not been for John supporting him, he would have fallen. The room seemed to have taken on enormous size; the door was miles away from where they had stood when the window shattered.

"Move it. We should never have associated with the likes of you. Filth like you will be the down fall of Kintarin. Move faster!" The leader hissed.

The muzzle of a gun stabbed Rodney in the back. His head cleared with shock and he sped up his movements, still uncoordinated, but energized by fear. He risked a look at John's face. John was looking blank. He didn't show fear or terror, there was nothing to read on his face. Rodney envied that, his own mind was reeling with panic.

They had been led down the hallway when everything happened at once. Rodney couldn't see what was going on, when suddenly gunshots erupted followed by alarmed screams.

One moment John was next to him, the next moment, John was on the ground, his face distorted in pain. His mouth was moving, but he was producing no sounds. His eyes were open, but glazed over in agony, his gaze without focus.

Rodney fell to his knees next to John, frantically grabbing his hand.

"Hold on, John. Please, don't move. It's going to be all right." Rodney babbled on, whispering to John. He repeated the words over and over.

Only when his vision blurred, he noticed that he was crying.

Without warning the ground shook again with a violent tremor. Rodney saw the wall rushing towards him. He started terrified for a moment then and without a second thought threw himself across John to protect him from the falling debris.

Rodney woke with a start. His heart was racing as he clutched at the blanket covering him. His eyes darted widely around the room. John? The gunmen? Rodney panicked, not recognizing the room he was in. Images assailed him, flashing before his eyes. John falling to the ground, blood spatters on the ground around him. The crash of shattering glass. The shockwave of the first explosion taking him by surprise, knocking him off his feet.

John? Where was he? He had to help John. John had been hurt and needed help. Rodney's mind was reeling. he jumped from the bed, ignoring the surge of pain trailing up his ribcage. He was half-way to the door when it opened and a young woman, followed by Elizabeth entered.

"Rodney!" Elizabeth exclaimed. "Are you all right?"

"Please Dr. McKay, lie back down. You are not fully healed yet." The woman, one of the Ymanhin as evident by her pale, almost bluish skin, went to guide him back to bed. Rodney shook her hand off his arm and focussed on Elizabeth. Her sudden arrival confused him even more. The last time, he recall seeing her, she had been led by a gunman down a corridor in the ministry of foreign affairs.

"What's going on? Where are John and Carson?" Rodney staggered back in the direction of the bed. The sharp pain in his chest led him to reconsider whether getting up had been such a good move after all.

"Can we have a moment alone?" Elizabeth turned to the woman who was still standing in the corner.

"Of course. I shall come back later." She gave a small bow and left.

"Yesterday morning there was a terrorist attack on the ministry of foreign affairs in Fiatyn." Elizabeth said gently, moving closer to the bed.

"Yes, yes. I remember. Explosions." Rodney shook his head to clear to cobwebs of fragmented memories.

"Yes, there were several explosions according to the authorities. The entire upper half of the building collapsed." Elizabeth paused, looking down. "A wall came down right on top of you. It looked like you were dead." Elizabeth swallowed.

The falling fall. He had thrown himself on top of John to protect him.

"What happened to John? Where is he?" Rodney urged.

"John and Carson are missing." Elizabeth said solemnly.

"Missing? How can they simply be missing?" Rodney almost shouted.

"The police think that the terrorist may have taken them as hostages. In the meantime, they are still searching the rest of the building for bodies."

"So they think they could be dead?"

"Yes. I don't know what happened either. When the corridor started to come down, I was knocked out."

"John was hurt, he'd been shot." Rodney almost whispered, horrified.

"The police and military is searching for them since they went missing. They will let us know as soon as they have something."

Rodney nodded. His mind was still trying to process the news.

"Isn't there something, anything that we can do?" Rodney finally asked.

"I'm afraid not. We are staying at least until the rescue teams have finished searching the ministry building for any survivor or bodies in the rubble. Then we'll know more. We have people helping the Ymanhin with the search. Sergeant Bates is leading the teams."

"I want to help." Rodney was determined.

"You can't. You were badly hurt when the wall came down. If it weren't for the Ymanhin advanced medical technology you wouldn't even have survived." Concern tinged Elizabeth voice.

"Where are we here?" For the first time since he had woken up, Rodney took in his surrounding. They were in a small room. The sole furniture consisted of a bed and a table by the window.

"The Fiatyn Medical Centre, you were rushed there as soon as they dug you out of the rubble. I sent for Dr. Alley to come here as soon as I heard. He has been overseeing your treatment and acting as a consultant. I expect he will see you later on."

That had been yesterday. His ribs were still painful to the touch and the pink skin marked where the newly healed wounds were. Dr. Alley would have liked him to stay at the medical centre for a few more days, until the nano bots complete mending the hairline fracture to his skull, but he had insisted to leave. He could not bear to spend another day of inactivity.

Rodney felt as if his world had been tilted, ever since he had woken up in the medical centre he had felt off balance, like a part of his life was missing. He had hardly gotten any sleep, every time he closed his eyes, images from the attack flashed before him, he saw the windows shatter, the masked gunmen pointing their guns at them, John's face contorted in pain.

Rodney couldn't bear to stay on Yamin. Sergeant Bates and the rescue teams had finished searching the ministry buildings. To Rodney's great relief, they had not found John's or Carson's body among the rubble. But he could not bear finishing negotiations while John was missing on an alien planet.

Rodney got to his feet and left the room where he was staying during the negotiations. He made his way down the hall towards Elizabeth's room. He knocked on the door.

"Come in." The response was immediate. Rodney entered.

Elizabeth looked up. "How are you, Rodney?"

"I'm okay." Rodney lied. "I think I should go back to Atlantis. I'd be of more use there. I'm not really needed at the negotiations at the moment. I can send Dr. Zelenka over to handle any matters that come up."

"Are you sure that you are all right? I talked to Dr. Alley today. He is concerned about you. Maybe you should go back to the medical centre."

"No, no, I'm fine." Rodney repeated. "I just need to get away." He added in a small voice.

"It's all right, Rodney. It's been a shock for all of us. But we can't give up hope now. Go back to Atlantis. I'll send Dr. Alley back along with you. I want him to check you out in the infirmary and I want you to talk to Dr. Heightmeyer when you get back."

One week later

Rodney sat up on the edge of his bed. He rubbed his face. It was early morning; pale pre-dawn light came through the window in his room. It was yet another morning since his return that he had been woken by disturbing dreams. Memories of the attack intermingled with images of John's dead body. Sometimes, he saw him crushed by falling debris, sometimes he saw him bleed to death from the gunshot wound. Why John? Why had they taken John and Carson while sparing him and Elizabeth? This question had haunted him over and over during his time in the infirmary. After his return, Dr. Alley who was temporarily taking over Carson's position had insisted to keep him in the infirmary for a few more days. Yesterday, he had finally released Rodney to his quarters. Now Rodney was alone with his nightmares. He had been to see Dr. Heightmeyer all right, but he could only talk about so much with her. He understood the flashbacks to the attack and the nightmares that he was experiences. Dr. Heightmeyer had assured him that they were a normal reaction to a traumatic event like the one he had been through. But there was no one he could talk to about his grief about John. He wasn't sure he wanted to. What he and John had shared couldn't be put into words.

TBC