Sorry not updated before now, but it has been busy, busy, busy. Thanks for the reviews, keep them coming or I will think you don't like it.
Chapter Three.
The words speechless and Buffy were definitely non-mixy,the fact that she sat with her mouth open and her brain racing and that her world was about to implode gave her an air of vulnerability that Spike found hard to ignore. The fact that for the hundreth time that night his trousers threatened to cut off his circulation and his words were anything but coherent and all he wanted to do was make love to her over the staff canteen table, oblivious to the audience they would have.
Buffy shook her head slightly , as if not quite believing what was happening. Spike watched her inner demons and he would have done anything to prove to her that he spoke the truth, but this was her information to digest. She glanced across at the worry lines on his face and she knew that whatever she could not do to him at this table, she had to express her feelings to him.
"Spike " she whispered quietly. " I can't say much here but, " She paused and Spike literally braced himself against the table, the pain in his face apparent.Fighting the urge to reach over and touch his face she instead stroked the inside of his leg with her foot, a move that made him give an anguished moan. Buffy bit her bottom lip" I wish this were easy, we're both married. " She sighed and Spike waited for the brushoff, the brushoff that said 'it's been fun to flirt and touch you but nothing else.' He was so intent on listening for the brushoff that he failed to hear what she actually said. He opened his mouth to speak and then a staff announcement went out.
"Buffy Finn to the customer service desk." She stood automatically and moved to the door. She had been a little disappointed that Spike had given her no reaction to what she had told him, she sighed and moved out onto the shop floor. She turned slightly as she saw Spike running towards her, he grabbed her arm.
"What did you say Buffy? I didn't hear you" she smiled widely at him and whispered in his ear.
"I love you too Spike" She moved round the corner to the customer service desk with a smile on her face.The smile dropped as she saw the customer."Hey, Riley" she said as her husband approached her. In what seemed like a plot from a comedy Spike continued round the corner at full pelt and knocked her over.
"Oh shit! Buffy I'm sorry." He bent down to help her up and she would have laughed if Riley wasn't also helping her up.
"You must be Spike.I'm Riley, Buffy's husband" In his head Spike said 'oh fuck',in the real world he smiled weakly and shook his hand.
"He seems nice" Riley said sincerely as Buffy walked him to the car. Buffy smiled weakly and nodded. She still wondered why he was shopping at 3am in the morning, she had not asked him."You ok honey?" he touched the side of her face lightly and she looked deep into his eyes, she wanted to see those things she had fallen in love with, she touched his face in return, but the only thing she could see was Spike's face and that nearly broke her heart.
"I'm fine, Riley. Go on home with you." She watched him from the car park as he started the engine .She waved wearily as the tears slowly fell down her face. This was the man she had married, the man she loved...but was not in love with and now she would destroy him . She had told another man she loved him tonight, without a thought for Riley. The tears fell and she didn't hear the footsteps behind her. Spike spun her round and clung to her . He smoothed her hair.
"I know, luv, I know." He held her whilst she cried.He did know what this would do , this whole thing with them and now it had to be her decision if this was to go any further. She had much more to lose than him. God help him if she walked away from him, he was already in too deep, but if she did he would respect her choice, he had to even if it eventually destroyed him.