Disclaimer: Sadly I'm not Rowling. Plot is mine characters are not, ect. Ect.
Marauder era, James and Sirius crash Lily Evans slumber party in hopes of finding out if she likes James or not, the only catch is Sirius and James have to pretend to be girls.
"You are going to WHAT?" Sirius asked bug-eyed
"Not just me, us, we are going to-" James whispered
"I am NOT dressing in drag! " Sirius hissed
"Keep you're voice down do you want the whole castle to hear?" James asked gesturing wildly, "C'mon," James begged "Lilly's friend Lalaine will be there…" James trailed off
"Why do you want to crash this stupid party anyway?" Sirius grumbled seeing that he didn't really have a choice of whether he wanted to go or not, "I just don't understand, everyone already knows Lilly likes you there is no reason to go to this party thing. Besides can't you slip her some of that truth potion stuff Slughorn was talking about the other day in Potions? I mean what if we get caught by the girls?"
"Do you really want to be caught stealing from Slughorn's stores? I really don't want to be scraping exploded rat's brains off the ceiling again. Besides whom would you rather face Slughorn with a wand and a whole closet of poisons at his disposal or a couple of angry girls?"
"Good point."
"Besides," James said with a sly smile, he put his arm around Sirius's shoulder, "Do you know how many boys would kill to be in our place? There are so many guys that would love to find out all the juicy things girls talk about when they are alone together. This would really pay off, we could tape them and sell the tapes and make a bundle, or we could blackmail them with their dirty little secrets, you see dressing in drag would be a minor drawback." James could see the wheels turning in Sirius's head.
"I still don't see why I have to come with you." Sirius grumbled, "I don't care I'm not going, it's not worth it."
James shook his head and smiled, "my dearest friend, I think I may have something that just might change your mind," he clapped Sirius on the back, "Just think, girls in their knickers running around having pillow fights at an all girls party."
Sirius turned to look at James with a glazed look in his eye and excitement plastered to his face, "Do you think they really do that?" He asked
"Of course!" James assured him
"Girls in their knickers having pillow fights, why didn't I think of that? Sign me up!"
"I knew you would see it my way." James said grinning.
Sirius's look of pleasure turned to a look of horror, "I don't have to run around in knickers do I? I am NOT wearing a thong! Do I have to shave my legs? I am not doing that either. Well actually I will if you pay me, I've done it before."
James looked at him disgusted "What? No, that's just, you are revolting! And when did you ever shave your legs? Never mind, I don't want to know." James shook his head. He pulled a bag from his backpack and tossed it to Sirius, "You'll be wearing this."
Sirius dumped the bag onto his lap. A pair of sky blue cotton drawstring pants with care bears on them had fallen out. He shook the bag again and a matching blue T shirt tumbled out after it.
"That's not so bad." Sirius said holding the shirt up.
James handed him a long blonde wig, "You'll have to wear this too."
Sirius stuffed it on his head "I don't think blonde is my color." He said grinning.
James pulled out his wand and pointed it at Sirius. "Whoa!" Sirius exclaimed holding up his hands, he looked at the wand suspiciously, "what are you going to do with that?"
"Well, as girls we, erm have to well, we have to, we have to you know look the part."
Sirius raised his eyebrows and James smiled sheepishly and pointed to Sirius's chest. "You know?" James asked not wanting to elaborate
"No I don't know! Don't point that thing at me!" Sirius hissed
James shrugged, "Well I guess we don't have to, but if we want to make it believable…" he trailed off.
"To hell with believable! You can be believable!" Sirius shouted
"C'mon." James begged
"No." Sirius said firmly, "I am not letting you put a spell on me to give me boobs! If I have to I'll stuff a bra or something, knowing you you'll screw up the spell and I'll look that way forever, you are pushing it to the limit here!"
"Fine." James said, "Suit yourself." James stood up, "I'm going to the great hall to get dinner, the slumber party begins at 9, and well that's when the guys are getting kicked out of the common room anyway. The girls got special permission from the head of the house to hold this thing."
"Whatever. I'll be ready." Sirius said leaning back onto his bed, he watched James leave the room and closed his eyes. "That Potter kid, freaking mental."