Disclaimer. yada yada yada. I own nothing.. if only I did, a nibble at Spike would help!
Chapter Five.
"Not much of a driver luv, are you?" Spike queried as she took the roundabout at high speed. He gripped onto the door handle, he felt his life depended on it. He caught her smile as she pulled over into the fast food car park. "You hungry?" He asked .Buffy shook her head , but got out of the car anyway. Spike followed, pulling out his cigarettes and leaning back on the car door to smoke it.
"There's no where open and besides if we sit alone in the car long enough, we might just get carried away. " She stepped up close to Spike and he nearly swallowed his cigarette in suprise as she cupped his hardness through his trousers. "Are you always this turned on?" she asked quietly as she stroked him through the material. Spike threw the cigarette and grabbed hold of her wrist to stop her.
"If you keep doing that we may just get carried away outside of the car" he leaned toward her though and allowed himself a simple kiss on her neck. "And suprisingly it's just you that gets me like that." He nibbled at her earlobe and felt her legs buckle beneath him."Are you always this turned on?" he laughed in her ear. He grabbed her hand and their fingers entwined ."A perfect fit " he said with wonder."Come on , we can at least get a coffee". He vaguely wondered whether they knew anyone who worked here, maybe they should have come further afield. But not if she was driving.Buffy sat at a table at the back of the restaurant as Spike grabbed a coffee. She rubbed her face in anguish, she knew that they had stepped over the flirting line and that everything that happened now was in dangerous territrory .So caught up in emotions she didn't see Spike return to the table, she felt him raise her chin with one finger and he looked at her with such love and longing that she wished things were just as simple as that.
"I have," she began quietly."Never felt like this about anyone else in my whole life." she sighed and sipped at the coffee."Not even Riley. I was on my own in the states, mom was here and so was Angel, Riley was kind and I grew to care for him, thought I loved him."She looked up at Spike. "That's why I was crying in the carpark, I just realised that I was never in love with him." she shook her head . " I realised that this is so going to be the end of everything I know." She rubbed her hand across her face again and Spike held her hand across the table. "I know there's no going back, do you?"
"Buffy, you have become my everything. Without even realising it at first, you have invaded me." He laughed. "I'm drowning in you and it's a good job I'm a pretty good swimmer or I'd be fucked." He paused as she squeezed his hand ." But there is something that you have to understand and I should have told you this before" He bit his bottom lip , in a gesture that mirrored Buffy's own. "I've been with Dru for ten years, since I was twenty five, an' she's not exactly Miss stable" he laughed at the irony of that statement. "Angel will tell you I've tried to get out of it lots and lots of times, but each time she's done something stupid, attempted suicide, self harming, you name it.But recently she's got much worse and i've been scared." Spike rubbed his hands through his hair "She started hurting me, I woke up from my sleep to find her doing this. "He lifted his shirt sleeve up and showed Buffy a large scab on his arm. "She burnt me with a cigarette or three." He laughed a little to break the tension, but Buffy did not laugh. Two large tears fell from her eyes and she touched the scab gently. "There are others, but not in places for public consumption." Buffy could not take her eyes off his arm and Spike wondered if he had told her too much."I need to get away from her, but I need to find the right way. I'm trying to get her to see her shrink again.But she's stubborn". He leaned forward and rubbed the tears away with his thumbs. "I can't afford her to get to you. That would kill me" She looked sharply up and saw that he spoke the truth, the love in his eyes blinded her in that moment.
"I love you Spike " She spoke and the tears fell from her eyes. He smiled broadly at her and squeezed her hand."And now I just need you on your own." She stood up swiftly and walked from the restaurant, leaving open mouth Spike at the table. "You really have to learn to keep up" She shouted over her shoulder .