Disclaimer: I do not own the Legacy of Kain; I only own the talking sword and Victor. If I owned Legacy of Kain, I wouldn't waste my time typing crappy fan fiction. Or maybe I would…I still don't own Legacy of Kain though…

Blood Omen

Legacy of Victor

Chapter one: Miscellaneous Idiocy

It was a dark and lethal night. Nothing stirred, not even an owl flew through the air. A fain fog settled ominously over the quiet streets. On this night, someone ordered a pizza.

Victor drove down the street slowly, looking for house number eight on Destiny Lane. Cheesy name really he thought to himself dryly. Cheesy name or no it was still in the dead of night. Victor was mortally afraid of the dark, not just any dark mind you but the kind of dark that was so silent it was sure to be hiding something. In other words, tonight. As terrified as he was however, he still had to deliver the pizza.

So on he drove, past twenty-nine, past twenty-eight, it was taking dreadfully long. Past twenty-four, past twenty-three, the fog that was so faint before was becoming thick now, it would be difficult to see the house numbers in this. In fact, the harder he tried to see the house numbers, the more they disappeared, along with the house and everything else on the street. He could not see the street in front of him but he still kept going on at the same slow pace. It was dreadfully painfully slow, his position in his seat was becoming quite uncomfortable, why hadn't he noticed sitting on something before? He reached around for the pizza to make sure it wasn't that that he was sitting on. He found it safe on the seat behind him. He looked out at the oncoming fog and it seemed as if the fog had gotten in the car, had he left a window open?

He simply could not drive in this, he put his foot on the brakes…but the car wouldn't stop, it just kept going at the same tantalizingly slow pace. What was worse was the ride was becoming very bumpy, it felt as if the vehicle itself was going to fall apart beneath him. Victor tried the gas pedal but that didn't do anything either. He could neither end his suffering by speeding the endeavor or bringing it to a stop. He let go of the steering wheel, covered his eyes in freight, and hugged the pizza box to his chest; he was going to die no matter what he did. It was all too much!

The car gave a sudden lurch and Victor fell forward grasping for the steering wheel, all he found was a rope and something fuzzy. He couldn't understand, what was happening? He was dazed, confused, and strangely hungry. The car wouldn't go, the car wouldn't stop, he was painfully uncomfortable, and is head was spinning horribly. But hey, the fog was letting up.

Ever so slowly, he was emerging from the accursed doom mist. Victor was sure that the sun's rays themselves would have danced in jubilation had they not died in the treacherous journey through the fog. It seemed, however, that coming out of the fog was not the answer to his current problem, in fact, it only made things worse. Victor looked about himself and realized, to his horror, he was not in Kansas…err, on Destiny Lane any more; he had walked into The Twilight Zone! (Dramatic no?)

Kain awoke to the sight of smooth gray stone above him. He gasped as he realized he was looking at the inside of his own coffin. He got out easily enough, but he was a bit shaken. Was he truly alive? At what cost, Kain wondered, was his second life? He meandered out of his crypt into harsh daylight; it was not as comforting as he had remembered. Thankfully, the sun was just setting, sending spectacular shadows from the gravestones. It was almost beautiful in a desolate sort of way.

Something glinted in his eye, causing him to look around. At the bottom of the hill on witch his moselliseum was perched there was a man inspecting his sword, or so it seemed. He was an oddly dressed man, if only because of the coat he was wearing, Kain had never seen one of its make before. Kain was intrigued, why was this man in a graveyard of all places? Surely there were better places to critique a sword…

Quite suddenly, and oh so unexpectedly, the man bellowed "SWORD YOU TALK TO MUCH!" and hurled what appeared to be his only weapon wildly shouting after it "AND MY NAME IS NOT KAIN!" Kain was unexplainably sure of two things in that instant. One was that this man was from unfathomably future times and the second was that no matter what he did the land of Nosgoth was doomed to stupidity no matter what he did. Kain could not bear the grim knowledge of the future; he committed suicide, hoping for an oblivion, which would save him from the lack of intelligence that was soon to come.

Victor was on a donkey in what appeared to be a very untechnoligic country clutching a pizza box. His first question was naturally how did I get here his second was where am I? The entire place looked for all the world like old Nosgoth. It was as if he had been transported back in time by the mist he had gone in…being an unreasonable person he figured this was what happened. He was no longer confused but he was tired and hungry so he sat down, right where he was, ate the pizza he had unwittingly dragged with him, and promptly fell asleep.

Victor awoke to find the donkey and the pizza box he was using as a blanket missing. Thinking sadly about that pizza he had eaten, he yawned got up and stretched stiffly. He looked towards the east and spotted a village, he figured his best bet was to find people and mooch some food off of them.

He had only just begun his journey when he ran into a group of mean looking men. "There he is! Or is it?" said one of them scratching his head.

"I think it is…yeah it is!" exclaimed another.

"Blimey..." said yet another of the heavily armed men. "You really packed on the pounds". And with that one of them promptly stabbed a sword through Victor's ribs. They had killed him for what they believed was the second, but was truly the first time.

Mortanious was in a wreck. Nosgoth's only hope had committed suicide only moments after emerging into un-life. He couldn't understand it, Kain had seemed so eager to enter life and extract his revenge…well, now it would always be a mystery because Kain was dead and that was that. Mortanious entered the graveyard and retrieved the heart of darkness from Kain's cold hard body. As soon as he took it out of Kain's chest cavity it resumed it's beating, it was strange how some of these things worked.

Mortanious had only taken a step or two from Kain's slightly rotten corps when something flashed in his eyes. He looked down and saw the something half buried in the dirt. He picked it up and turned it over in his hand, it seemed familiar… a fog started to surround him, it rapidly closed in. That had been one of Moebius's confounded pocket time streaming devices. Damn it and he told Moebius not to leave those blasted things lying around too! He dropped the device at once ceasing the journey back through time most nauseatingly.

He didn't seem to have gone back far, but there was always the chance that he was wrong. Just then he heard shouting coming from below him and he looked down. There was fighting at the entrance of the graveyard. A circle was formed around a man, they were taunting taunting him, jeering at him cruelly, and then, one of them stabbed him in the back.

The circle dissipated and Mortanius picked his way down to what he feared to be a dead man. He was lying face first in the dirt but Mortanius knew who it was without looking. This was the murdered nobleman Kain. Mortanius grinned and pulled the sword out of the fresh corpses back. This was his second chance, Nosgoth's second chance. The world would be redeemed after all. Through his exultation, he hardly noticed how oddly dressed Kain was…

Victor sat up with a start. What a strange dream he had had. First he was transported back in time, then unfriendly people killed him, then he was brought back from hell into the world of the living where he promptly sat up and thought it was all a dream…so it wasn't a dream after all. He sat for a while, dumb and uncomprehending as he tried to work out the situation in his head. No matter how he twisted it he just could not grasp his situation. Then, it hit him. His eyes widened in shock as realization took over. There were no microwaves in this era!

Victor squinted at the slowly rising sun, it was only about 11 am and he was already sweating. Maybe he could cook his hot pockets on a roc somewhere. He was just so hot! Perhaps it was because of the big black metal Armour he was wearing…Victor gasped as he realized he was wearing big black metal Armour. How had he come to be wearing Armour?

"Hey" said a voice behind him.

"OH GOD! DON'T MAE ME JOUST!" Victor screamed and assumed the fetal position as an answer.

"Whoa, calm down" the mysterious voice soothed. "I won't make you joust, I just wanted to welcome you into unlife and say 'hi, I'm sword'". Sword? Victor opened his tightly shuteyes and looked around.

"Where are-" Victor began but was cut off by the swords exasperated reply.

"I'm down here idiot, did I not just say I was sword?" Victor looked down stupefied, was that sword really talking to him? No, it wasn't the sword itself but an entity trapped within the blade that was speaking to him now. What monstrous horror was this? And most importantly, why did this Armour have no zippers on it?

"Come Kain, we need to go to your mollesum to collect some artifacts, the grave yard in which your grave lies is to the south west, not far from here". The sword said, and Victor gazed out at the green expanses.