I finally got some inspiration for the newest installment! Thank you NJHS teacher appreication day! Without you, this wouldn't be possible. And you Andrea, thank you so much! Without you I don't think I would be writing this, especially with so much randomness. You're so filled with ideas. mwahah

Nall: Can you please shut up and write?

me: Fine fine..

Nall: This chapter will have the usual yaoi and stuff, not as strong rating this chapter. Mostly just stupid stuff about...

Me: FUDGE!

Beware the typos, and the odd midle (I was bored so I threw in some non-humour as a filler)

Sabbatical
Chapter Six: Fudge Is God's Food

"Wake up, Yuan." Kratos poked Yuan a few times in the side of the arm. Twitching irratibley, Yuan cracked open and eye and starred blankly at Kratos. This was their seventh day at this place, and the daily rountines were getting boringsome. Forutantely, something new is always happeneing in a casino.

"What now?" Yuan growled, squinting his eyes at Kratos.

"Drew Carey is really upset," Kratos sighed heaviliy, sitting down on the edge of Yuan's bed.

"Oh, grand. What now?" Yuan was half-listening as he pulled the blanket over his head.

"Listen," Kratos pulled the blanket down so he could see Yuan's face. "He claims Devon broke up with him and now is going out with Jim Carrey." Kratos explainied.

"Might I ask you how the hell is Devon?" Yuan rubbed his forehead. Head aches were becoming an usual.

"Some fourteen year old boy," Kratos murmured.

"Isn't that illegal?" Yuan asked, tilting his head.

"Believe so. Then again, the authoress of this story has daydreams of much more illegal stuff then that," Kratos began. Oddly, he found himself stopping. Humph, teach he a lesson for talking crap about me!

"I bet the police will arrest Drew!" Yuan spoke hopefully.

"Doubt it."

"Put him in jail for a day?"

"Nope."

"Put him in a padded room in an asyalum."

"Defientley not."

"Put him in a retirement home?"

"Yuan, he's in our bathroom." Kratos stopped Yuan from his insane guesses.

"I told you, I don't want him in our room!" Yuan snapped, throwing a pillow at Kratos.

"This isn't our room, Yuan." Kratos pointed out.

"Ok, I don't want him our rented room, damnit!" Yuan snapped about to slap across.

"Show come compassion," Kratos pouted, trying to feel sorry for Drew Carey.

"The only compassion you should be feeling is for me, got it!" Yuan spoke, clenching his fists tightly. Snickering, Kratos got up and grabbed his drink from the table. "Don't tell me you're going to get drunk this early in the morning..."

"One drink won't get me drunk." Kratos advised.

"Krrrrattttiiieee."

"Krattie? Now he's calling you 'Krattie'!" Yuan spoke, obviously jealous by now. Arising to his feet angriliy, Yuan placed a hand on his hip and starred the seraphim in the eye.

"Not my idea," Kratos began.

"Kratttiiiieee I need my spongebath now."

"Sponge.. bath?" Yuan spoke, turning a dark red from rage.

"Yuan, it's not what you think," Kratos began, turning pale.

"How dare you cheat on me with Drew Carey. You bastard," Yuan snapped leaving the hotel room with a slamming of the door. Kratos sighed and shook his head with dread.

"Krattie?"

"Coming, damnit." Kratos huffed bitterly.

By now Yuan was pissed beyhond belief. You really shouldn't upset someone by confessing you're cheating on them, especially after you got layed the night before by them. Ahem. Anyways, Yuan walked down the hallway leaving the hotel and to the casino. Glancing around, he noticed a snackbar. Maybe it had drinks.

"Excuse me, do you have any beer?" Yuan asked, walking up to the counter.

"No." The man spoke, as if was puffing his cheeks out on purpose.

"Wine?" Yuan asked hopefully.

"No."

"Whisky?"

"No."

"Any alocholic beverage?" Yuan asked pitifully.

"I do have this weed-" The guy began.

"I'm not that dense to get jacked up off that shit," Yuan murmured looking downward.

"Aren't you Yuan?" The man spoke.

"And just who the hell are you?" Yuan leaned against the counter suspiouscly.

"Don't you recongize me? I did that Burger King Commerical last Christmas! You know! Ding fries are done. Ding fries are done. Ding fries are done. Ding fries are done. I work at Burger king-" The man began singing that idiotic song.

"Shut it!" Yuan hissed flipping him off. Why is Yuan so mean? Because Kratos just cheated on him, duh! Keep up!

"Fine, leave." The guy spoke taking the broom from the kitchen and chasing Yuan out of the snackbar.

"Someone has a bug up their ass," Yuan murmured walking down the hallway. After a few minutes, Yuan had finally come to a stage in the middle of the casino filled with slot machines. Pausing, Yuan walked up and looked at the banner and read it outloud.

"Fifth annual fudge eating contest. The winner will receive a full massage and day at our high class spa, and be able to preform live with The Killers." Yuan paused and starred at it.

"Fudge eating contest? That ought to be easy. If I win this, I'm pretty sure I can win Kratos back," Yuan smirked eviliy for a moment then nodded to himself. "Precisely, I'll enter, and win."

Walking over to a table of people with paper, Yuan cleared his throat and looked at them hopefully.

"Are you here to sign up for the fudge eating contest?" One lady asked, holding a pencil.

"Erhm yes."

"Name?" She asked, about to write it down.

"Yuan."

"Last name?"

"Um.." Yuan paused and felt himself turn scarlet. What the hell was his last name.

"Sir?" The lady asked, looking back up at him. Sighing, Yuan beant over and whispered it into her ear. She nodded and wrote it down. DAMNIT. Why can't we ever learn his last name. Fine, be secretive Yuan! You won't earn Kratos back that way. Baffoon!

"When does it start?" Yuan asked, crossing his arms.

"A few hours. We'll call you over the intercom," She smiled brightly. Just then Yuan had an idea. The lightbulb flashed on in his head, and he thought of the perfect way to make Kratos jealous. Now was the time to turn on his chick magnatism.

"Hey, if you're not busy with sign ups, care to go for a latte?" Yuan asked. He had no idea what a latte was, but he did remember a commerical for one.

"R-really?" She asked, a little stunned.

"Mhm," God this was as easy as pie. Maybe I should forget Kratos and start dating girls again. This is so much easier Yuan thought to himself.

"Alright," She smiled. Then again, she's just a pawn in my plan Yuan pondered for a few more minutes.

"Then let's go," He smiled. A fake smile. She arose to her feet, stunned by the sudden offer and walked next to Yuan with a glittering smile. They began to walk down the casino to the nearest Star Bucks Coffee.

"So, what's your name?" Yuan asked, distant-minded. He was still thinking about Kratos. Just thinking about what he could be doing right now with Drew Carey sickened him to the point of no return.

"Rachel," She stated simply crossing her arms. "I have to ask you this."

"What?" Yuan asked, installing her name in his head.

"Why is your hair blue. I mean, it's nice and all, but why did you decide to die it blue?" She asked, taking her black hair out of her bun. I can't tell her it's naturally like this. I'll just lie. Yes, lieing is perfect.

"I was part of a band, and I thought dying it might be a good choice," Yuan fumbled through the lie.

"Oh really! No wonder you want to win that fudge eating contest," Rachel smiled.

"Uh... oh right, exactly," Yuan thought. Oh shit. if I actually win this, I'll have to sing on stage with The Killers. Terrific.

"The Starbucks is right ahead," Rachel pointed out.

"Right," Yuan sighed and walked in with her. After they ordered their drinks, they sat down at the only avaible half booth. So basically, Yuan was forced to sit right next to her. Like an inch apart. Glancing around, Yuan's heart stopped. Sitting at the other part of the cafe was none other then Kratos and Drew Carey. Biting down on his lip angirliy, Yuan sharply averted his gaze back at Rachel. Sadly, Kratos had noticed Yuan also and starred at them curiously. Time to make Kratos j-e-a-l-o-u-s

"So, Rachel, are you here on vacation with your boyfriend?" Yuan asked vaguely. Looking out of the corner of the eye ocassionally to see if Kratos was looking.

"I don't have one. My husband died in a car accident. How about you?" She asked, stirring her coffee.

"My fiance died years ago, then my former relationship just ended," Yuan sighed heaviliy.

"I'm sorry to hear that," She whispered, taking a sip.

"Yea... I am too," Yuan glanced down at his drink and thought back at all the good times with Kratos. Even this trip was heaven, because he was with him.

"She must have been insane to let you go," Rachel spoke softly. Yuan glanced back at her and shrugged.

"I suppose," Yuan sighed taking a sip, trying to get his mind of the seraphim.

"Hey, after the contest, want to go see the fireworks with me? I heard it's awesome there," She smiled.

"Hmm?" Yuan spoke then nodded. "yea, sure." He sighed.

"All contestants for the fudge eating contest, please report back to the center stage. Thank you." The intercom announced.

"Let's go," Rachel smiled as she got up with Yuan. She grabbed his hand and lead him out of the resturant. With one final glance back at Kratos, Yuan saw Kratos' face completely pale from stunned, looking away, Yuan followed Rachel.

"Welcome all contestants! This is the fifth annual fudge eating contest! As stated, the prizes are absoultely wonderous! Now, competors, take your places." The annoucner declared. Yuan glanced at Rachel before heading onto stage.

"Good luck," She smiled.

"Thanks." He lightly smiled and got on stage.

"Take your seats. On the count of three," Yuan sat down at the third seat in and starred at the wedge of fudge on the platter. It was basically the size of a large laptop. And it was as thick as a dictornary. Webster's that is!

"Good grief," Yuan murmured starring at the fudge. At least it was chocolate. Everybody loves chocolate fudge!

"One," Yuan glanced out into the audience and scanend it. "Two." There he was.. Kratos. Standing with Drew Carey, as expected. What the hell was Kratos on to be in love with that.. that thing! "Three!" the timer went off and Yuan was blasted out of his thoughts and starred at the fudge.

"Fudge... you're going down," Yuan snickered and began to eat fudge. God.. now he gets to eat fudge! Yummy! About a quarter of the way through the fudge, half of the competeors had been elimanted. As he ate, he kept his eyes on Rachel. If he starred at Kratos, the seraphim would get ideas. Come on. Eat! Win that damn prize and make Kratos jealous as hell. Yuan kept telling himself.

"Eat the fudge! Come on eat!" The annoucner spoke yelling into people's ears. Angriliy, Yuan took a piece of his fudge and smuthered it all in his face. "AACK.. yum. This is good fudge!" The guy spoke licking his face. A sweat drop rolled off Yuan's face as he contiuned to eat the fudge. Eat the ffuuuudgge.

"You can do it, Yuan!" Rachel screamed from the sidelines. Turning a dark scarlet, Yuan contiuned to eat the fudge faster. Halfway through now, there were five competors left. Some fat guy, Dr. Eggman, George Bush, and Bob Koffman (from bob's discount furniture).

"And in a triumphant defeat, George Bush is elimnated," The annoucner declared as Bush pushed the fudge away.

"I"m you're president and you declare defeat upon me! I'll have this state bull-dozed!" George Bush threatened.

"Come on George, it's some good fun. We all love you," The announcer stutterted. George walked off stage. Yuan tried not to crack up as he contiuned to eat. Next to fall was Dr. Eggman.

"Excepting another defeat in his life, Dr. Eggman is out!" The announcer declared as Eggman rolled off stage about to be sick. Now there was three.

"Come on, Yuan!" Rachel screamed. Yuan glanced up at her to see her jumping from the sidelines cheering him on. I'm leading her on, just to make Kratos jealous. What piece of filth am I? Yuan sighed and contiuned on the last quarter of his fudge. Next to fall was the fat man. Now it was against Bob Koffman and Yuan.

"Give it up, Yuan. You can't beat me, King of the Sofas and Fudge!" Bob laughed eviliy from a few seats away. Yuan glared at him.

"Shut it up, mattress boy." Yuan turned his glance away and finished his fudge. Bob starred blankly, in utter defeat.

"And the new-comer, Yuan, has wiped out the competetion!" The announcer spoke walking over to him. I am never eating any more fudge in my life Yuan sighed.

"As winner, I give you one back-stage to the concert for that special someone, you're proth of victory, and two passes to the Daily Spa!" The man clapped and everyone clapped. Yuan smiled lightly and looked at the people. Everyone was clapping, except Kratos. Something flickered in his eyes as he starred blankly. As if it could get anymore akward, Rachel ran onstage and flung her arms around him playfully.

"I knew you were a fudge champion when I saw you," She joked hugging him tightly. Oh fuck..Yuan looked out at the crowd at Kratos. His face went pale as he turned around and walked away. Well, I succeded. But why do I feel so low? Yuan glanced at Rachel clinging to him. That's right.. I'm lieing to this poor human.

"I'll meet you at the concert later tonight, okay Rachel?" Yuan spoke with a sigh and passed her the other ticket. She smiled widely and blushed.

"T-thanks. I thought there wasn't a guy with a pure heart, but I guess I was wrong," She closed her eyes and left in a hurry turning a dark scarlet. Guy with a pure heart? She musn't know me.. I am far from perfect. Worse then that. I'm gay. God damnit!

Yuan made it back to his and Kr-, I mean the hotel room he shared with a certain someone. He closed his eyes and flung himself on his bed and gave a heavy sigh. Something felt different. Opening his eyes, he was stunned to death. Everything was made of fudge! Absolutely everything! Even the bed. Stunned, Yuan got up and glanced around.

"Fudge, doesn't it make you think?" Kratos spoke walking out of the bathroom and glared icily at Yuan.

"You made everything in the room out of fudge just to piss me off, didn't you?" Yuan asked, clenching his fist.

"No, I did it for fun. No shit Yuan! And besides, I don't mind you and your little 'girlfriend'. Take her, but as long as you're being like this, I want you the fuck out of my room!" Kratos yelled at Yuan. WHAT! Where was it in the deal that I'd be kicked out of the room! Yuan thought to himself.

"You can't do that, you ass!" Yuan began.

"I can do as I please. You're not the boss of me anymore."

"Kratos, I never told you to do anything."

"Oh really? And now you're out picking up any girl you can find. You're fucking gay and yet you're picking out whores? Pathetic," Kratos snickered.

"Don't you dare call her a -" Yuan began but then stopped. How did this happen? Me and Kratos have been through so much. So much funny crap, so much stupid crap. What the hell is going on? He protected me from those pigs... and now? Now he's with the one person I hate, and I'm with some random chik I found. Since when did this whole thing turn into a sappy soap opera!

"And for you're information, I'm not with him, Yuan. I was trying to tell him there's people out there better for him then Devon. Why the hell would I want to be with some fat fag like him?" Kratos asked.

"You were with him at the cafe," Yuan snapped.

"I was trying to help him find someone to get with. That was until you and that girl walked in together," Kratos looked down.

"Kratos, I don't have time for this," Yuan murmured.

"I know, you have to go sing," Kratos sighed.

"Yea.." Yuan spoke uneasily. "And I want you to be there," Yuan stutterted. "I want the old Kratos back, damnit."

"What about you're 'bitch'?" Kratos asked.

"Shit... that's right."

"Wait, I've got an idea. Trust me on this Yuan," Kratos grinned and placed a hand on Yuan's shoulder.

"Kratos," Yuan whispered.

"Yes?"

"I missed you..." Yuan spoke, resting his head upon Kratos' shoulder and began to lightly cry.

"I'm sorry... everything will be ok. I love you, remember that," Kratos spoke running a hand through Yuan's hair. "Let's go sabbatical-fy this chapter," kratos grinned and grabbed Yuan's hand and dragged him down to the concert.

"But you don't have a ticket," Yuan complainied, as Kratos raced with him down to the concert hall.

"So?" Kratos grinned.

"Stubborn as ever," Yuan spoke.

"WHERE ARE YOU GOING?" The voice commonly known as Drew Carey come from behind them.

"It's for you," Yuan spoke with a sigh.

"Leave us alone for the final time!" Kratos yelled, holding Yuan's hand tightly as they charged down the hall. Yuan glanced over his shoulder and saw Drew Carey riding a huge chariot and was dressed up as the God Of The Sea with men dressed up as dolphin running by his side.

"Don't look now," Yuan cracked up.

"I know..." Kratos grinned as they ran into the concert hall and to the room where supposedely the band was. Sadly, it was a closet. Kratos glanced around and looked over at Yuan from the darkness.

"We're in a closet," kratos began but Yuan shoved a huge chunk of fudge in his mouth.

"Fudge!" Kratos squeaked.

"Squeaking is my thing," Yuan pouted.

"Shut up and have some fudge!" Kratos cheerfully replied.

"Let's just get out of this closet then we'll-" Yuan began as he reached for the doorknob. "We're locked in." Yuan hung his head down.

"But we have fudge," Kratos pointed out.

"I'm going to miss the concert.." Yuan sighed.

"But we have fudge."

"I'll never have a chance to preform live in this world."

"But we have fudge."

"I'll never be able to dedicate a song to you..."

"But we have- you what?" Kratos began then lightly smiled.

"Dedicate a song to you," Yuan snickered.

"What song?" Kratos asked, eating more fudge.

"Does it matter!"

"Is it a kinky song or a slow one?" Kratos asked.

"Since when did you say 'kinky'?"

"It's better then saying seductive or sexy," Kratos replied.

"But it really ends the mood," Yuan complainied.

"But.. that's what fudge is for!"

"Are you suggesting we have sex while eating fudge O.o?"

"Maybe..." Kratos grinned then ate more fudge and laughed. "Kidding. I only will eat one thing in that situation."

"I could deal without the perverted comments right now. I need to get to that concert," Yuan pouted.

"You only wanted to dedicate a song to me, correct?" Kratos asked.

"Yea, exactly."

"Then sing here, now. I've got fudge, were in a dark place, just the two of us. What else do you need?" Kratos grinned.

"Good point."

"Hey, one thing Yuan," Kratos asked.

"What?"

"I've been wondering. How was the meatloaf?"

"The meatloaf?" Yuan asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, the meatloaf with the white stuff on it. I hope it was mannoyise. Please say it was.." Kratos began.

"Kratos, I have no clue what you're talking about."

"Forget it. Anyways, I have to tell you something else."

"Go ahead."

"Did you know that the authoress of this story had a conversation about twinkies with five boys and she made people bow down to her twinkie, then gave it to someone and they took off the plastic. And they said it was good!" Kratos chimed hap- HEY WAIT A SECOND! IT WASN'T MEANT TO BE PERVERTED! THE GUYS I SIT WITH JUST ARE THAT WAY. COME ON KRATOS! THAT WAS MEAN T.T

"Funny stuff," Yuan snickered.

"Anyways, about that song," Kratos poked Yuan's elbow.

"Fine what song?" Yuan asked.

"How about... I don't know. You pick."

"Kratos.. we have a problem."

"Yes?"

"We're out of fudge..."

AN:

Yes, it wasnt' as funny as expected but still... at least it was a chapter. I tried my best. Next chapter will be better, I promise. And yes, I did that kratos/yuan fake break up randomly. So that Yuan could confess to himself that he really was gay. LMAO! Anyways, next chapter soon. And how could they eat all that fudge..