That said, enjoy! Review if you read so I know what's good and what's bad, please!
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In spite of all the previous night's events, the Fairy Godmother was up all the earlier the next morning to attend to business. She found herself somewhat short-staffed; only about half of her employees showed up for work, and they really only came to see if the rumors of her demise were true. Thankfully, Jerome was one of the ones who showed up; she could deal without the factory workers for a while. It wasn't production she was concerned with at the moment. Right now, she had to untangle herself from the mess she had created. Luckily, she was beginning to formulate a plan.
"Jerome, have a message delivered to the palace," she announced briskly as he stood tenatively in the doorway to her office. "Let Harold know that I want to schedule a meeting here with him as soon as possible this afternoon. There's no point in catching him off guard...the whole kingdom knows our affairs by now. The element of surprise isn't going to do much," she said, mostly to herself.
"Yes, Fairy Godmother," the French elf replied, giving a little bow as he left the room. Just as he was leaving, Charming entered, and the Fairy Godmother smiled warmly at her son.
"Good morning, pumpkin. Sleep well?" she asked, then pushed a plate of danish on her desk towards him. "Have some breakfast."
"What's this about a meeting with Harold?" the prince asked, avoiding her first question all together as he took one of the pastries.
"It can't be helped. Quite frankly, dear, I've only got one card left to play, and I'm afraid it isn't a very high card," she admitted with a sigh. As much as she was pretending that last night had never happened, she had realized then that she couldn't go on hiding so much from Charming 'to protect him' as she had been.
"Mum..." Charming began. "Would you be...well, terribly upset with me...if I told you that I don't think I really want to marry Fiona after all that's happened?"
"I don't really think that's going to be possibly, anyway," she answered, trying to control her temper as she thought about how wrong things had turned out. "I've fought very hard for this, and I DO hate to lose it now, but...well, right now I'm afraid I'm going to be lucky if I'm even able to stay on as Fairy Godmother of Far Far Away. Of course, I'm certainly going to try to get the kingdom for you, but if that doesn't work, the only other option would be if we took it by force...and no matter how much magic I've got, I simply don't have the resources for a takeover of that size. Besides, takeovers make the people angry...and what good is ruling a kingdom if you aren't loved and adored by everyone?"
There was a short silence as Charming considered that, chewing on a mouthful of Danish. "What's this card you're going to play, then, Mum?" he finally asked.
"Leave that to me. All you've got to do is be quiet and pretend that you're sorry for all the trouble. And do try to act sincere about it," she added, her attention already focused back on some papers on her desk.
"I was raised to be charming, not sincere," he replied, quite honestly. His mother nodded, not looking up at him.
"Yes, dear, I know. Now run along, and be back by this afternoon to get ready for the meeting," she instructed. He sighed a little but nodded.
"Yes, Mother," he replied as he left the room again.
Once Charming was gone, the Fairy Godmother sighed heavily and reached for another danish. She really had very little hope that her idea was going to work, which was an unusual feeling for her. Normally, she had all the confidence in the world that she would get what she wanted. That confidence had been shaken to its very foundations in the past few days as everything fell apart around her.
At least she felt more like herself than she had last night. After a few hours of sleep, the whole ordeal seemed like a strange dream, and she was able to put it behind her and go on with business. In fact, she felt rather silly, crying and carrying on the way she had; now that she was able to take a step back from things, she thought her behavior was foolish. She had a business to run, and that left no time for doing things like sniffling over old boyfriends.
"Jerome, did you get that message sent out yet?" she snapped over the intercom. The meek French voice answered from the other room.
"Yes, Fairy Godmother."
"Good. I don't want to be disturbed for the next couple of hours while I'm making another batch of the Happily Ever After potion. And do your job this time," she said, irritated at the memory of him letting the ogre just wander in.
"Yes, Fairy Godmother."
She sighed, waving her wand in the direction of the door to lock it this time. The Happily Ever After potion was one of the more delicate ones that she always made herself, not trusting the process to her employees. Drawing open the red curtain, she flittered in front of the ingredient shelf, knowing exactly what she needed for the potion. Her hand was halfway to a bottle that read "Love's First Kiss" when she stopped, catching sight of another, smaller bottle labeled "Loyalty". And, quite suddenly, a plot began to hatch in her head.
"I do believe I may be able to pull out of this, after all," she murmured aloud, smiling a somewhat evil smile.
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At four o'clock that afternoon, Harold and Lillian both arrived at the Fairy Godmother's cottage. They had argued a little over Lillian's attendance; Harold said that since her name was not mentioned in the message, she shouldn't come along, but she insisted that she wasn't going to leave him alone to make any more bargains with 'that woman'. They entered the cottage without speaking; Harold was perched on Lillian's shoulder, as he was still a frog.
"Good afternoon, your majesties," the elven desk clerk said, standing at their arrival. He had put his hand discreetly on the intercom button before he spoke, letting the Fairy Godmother hear the greeting so she would know they had arrived. Harold and Lillian said nothing, although Lillian did manage to nod politely in Jerome's direction. Moments later, the Fairy Godmother herself appeared, a very convincing smile on her lips.
"Lillian!" she exclaimed, a bit surprised, but the smile still plastered on. "I wasn't expecting you, dear. I'll have to set another place for tea," she said, giving a little laugh. Lillian didn't smile; neither did the frog king sitting on her shoulder. There was an awkward silence, then the Fairy Godmother spoke again, her voice still merry. "Well, let's get on with it, shall we? If you'll just follow me into my office..."
Wordlessly, the royal couple followed her down the hall, with two body guards behind them. The guards looked dwarfed by the two thugs standing just outside the Fairy Godmother's office. Both sets of men took their places, two on either side of the door, as the three people entered. The door swung shut behind them.
Charming was already in the office, seated to the right of his mother's desk and facing the two chairs in front of it. Something about him seemed older than he had the night before; his expression was neither bored nor cocky, although he did appear to be the slightest bit annoyed at something. Lillian offered him a slight smile as she entered; she really held nothing against the boy, although she had never quite trusted him. His mother gave him a look behind the rulers' backs that plainly said 'play along with whatever I say'.
"Sit down, please," she said sweetly, gesturing to the chairs in front of the desk as she flew to her own chair. "Have some tea," she added, flicking her wand towards a teapot, which automatically poured its contents into three cups. Remembering that she needed a fourth, the Fairy Godmother charmed one off a shelf by the wall. All four cups floated over to their respective owners.
"Er, I do believe I would feel a bit more comfortable if you could put that away while we're talking," Lillian spoke up, eyeing the star-tipped wand. The Fairy Godmother just smiled graciously and nodded, opening up her desk drawer.
"Oh, no trouble at all," she replied, settling the wand in next to the Oreos. Her tone grew more serious as she continued. "First of all, I want to say that I am deeply sorry for my behavior and my son's, both last night at the ball and earlier," she began, watching the royals closely to see if they were drinking their tea. They were, and she had to fight to hide a smirk. Instead, she adopted the most pious and apologetic expression she could muster. She gave Harold and Lillian a moment to reply; when they did not, she continued. "You see, I only wanted what's best for my child...surely you can both understand that, being parents yourselves. But I'm afraid I let desire cloud my better judgement, and my temper got in the way."
It was Lillian who spoke, a slight frown on her features. "You tried to kill our daughter and son-in-law," she reminded.
"Kill? Goodness, is that what you think?" she asked in a shocked tone. "Your majesty, I want you to know that I had no intention of killing Fiona or th-- or Shrek. The spell I cast was merely to change them back into their ogre forms...which is why Harold turned into a frog again."
"Then why did it turn you into bubbles?" Harold asked, speaking up for the first time. He was still irritated.
"That's the default reaction if I'm hit with any sort of spell from my own wand," she explained sweetly. "It's a sort of a safe-guard, if you know what I mean."
There was a pause before Harold replied, "Well...yes, I suppose that makes sense. It certainly explains why you're here now."
Another pause came as the Fairy Godmother sipped her tea, biding her time as she watched the royal couple drinking their own tea. Charming hadn't touched his, not that she was worried about him drinking it; she had lined both their cups with a counterpotion to the tea's contents. He also hadn't said a word for the entire duration of the meeting. Chancing a sideways glance at him, his mother made a mental note to talk to him later. Something didn't seem right about him...the annoyed air about him almost seemed to be directed at her.
"I hope you will both agree to allow me to remain on as the fairy godmother of Far Far Away," she said, testing the waters slowly. "Seeing as how there is no one else with enough experience to handle the job at this point in time. I will, of course, restore Harold to his rightful state."
"Well, I don't see any harm in you remaining in your position," Lillian answered. Harold said nothing; the Fairy Godmother took that as a sign things were going as she planned.
"Now, about our other agreement," she began. Harold interrupted her.
"Other agreement?" he asked, suspicious. "What other agreement?"
"The one that was broken, of course," the Fairy Godmother continued calmly, taking a sip of her tea. "The way I see it, since Fiona and her husband more than likely have no interest in ever ruling Far Far Away...and since, in their state, they would make highly unorthodox rulers anyway, the best resolution for all of us would be to name Charming as the successor to the throne," she finished, confident that Harold and Lillian were going to agree with her every word.
To her surprise and dismay, they didn't. Lillian looked at her with a deep frown; Harold drew himself up to his full height as a frog in a failed attempt to look majestic. "I beg your pardon, madam," he began tersely. "The right to the throne belongs to Fiona, and it's her choice whether or not she wants to rule the kingdom after we're gone. No one elses. Certainly not yours," he snapped. Lillian nodded slightly in agreement. The Fairy Godmother could do nothing but look flabbergasted for a few moments, and she chanced a glance in her son's direction...only to notice that he looked oddly satisfied. Suddenly, realization of what he had done dawned on her, and her jaw clenched momentarily in anger. However, she quickly regained her composure and, ever the actress, offered a sweet smile to the king and queen.
"Of course, your majesty! I was merely offering a suggestion that might help you," she replied, still smiling. "And of course, you must understand that I have an obligation to want the very best for my son--"
"You already used that argument," Lillian said. There was a moment of awkward silence before Charming spoke, for the first time all afternoon.
"I'm sure Mum will be happy enough as long as she is allowed to remain on as the Fairy Godmother of Far Far Away," he replied, flashing a moderate but winning smile at the royal couple. "Now, I'm sure the king would like to be turned back into a human before they return to their palace."
His mother blinked at him; she wasn't used to seeing her son show so much authority. She had always been in charge. Yet here he was, acting as though...well, acting as though he were a king, really. She didn't know whether to be proud or furious. She did, however, know that everyone was looking at her expectantly.
"Of course, I was just about to get 'round to that," she replied with a false laugh. "Harold, you might want to stand in the middle of the room, rather than in the chair..."
"Er..." he began, and blushed as much as a frog could. "Will...that is...well, will there be....clothes this time?" She tried not to laugh outright, and noticed Lillian was also hiding a smirk.
"Yes, Harold," she answered as he hopped down from his chair. She stood up from her desk and began to wave her wand. Harold glowed blue for a moment, then levitated out of the air. Thirty seconds later, he stood before the company as a human, dressed in his usual blue attire.
"Well, we'd better be going," Lillian announced, smiling with relief now that her husband was back to his rightful form. From her hurried attitude, it was easy to guess that getting him back to normal was the only reason she had even let him agree to the meeting. "Thank you very much for restoring Harold, Fairy Godmother," she added politely.
"Yes, quite right," Harold added, still looking himself over to make sure he was, in fact, human again.
"No trouble at all!" the Fairy Godmother answered, ushering them towards the door. "And do come back any time if you should ever need anything!" The door shut heavily behind them, and for a moment, the silence in the office was deafening.
"That went rather well," Charming said casually, still lounging in the chair by his mother's desk. She whirled on him, furious.
"What did you do to my potion?" she demanded, hands on her hips as she hovered in the air.
"I switched the tea," he answered, not seeming the least bit intimidated. "I rather guessed what you had in mind, so while you were out of the office, I simply poured out the tea in the pot and added some fresh."
"But Charming....sweetheart..." she said, trying a slightly different approach. "That...that might have been your last chance at the kingdom!"
"I don't WANT the bloody kingdom, Mother!" he snapped, standing up suddenly from his chair.
"Nonsense! You've always wanted the kingdom!" she argued, her temper fizzling out as he stood up to her.
"No, Mum. i>You've /i> always wanted the kingdom," Charming replied, somewhat gentler. "And I thought I wanted it because it was what you wanted. But...I did a lot of thinking last night, about what I really wanted. And I don't want the kingdom. It isn't mine to take, Mum. It's Fiona's."
The room was quiet as the Fairy Godmother let his words sink in. She shook her head, not believing what she was hearing, and she slowly lowered herself until she was standing, feet on the floor. "But...Charming, it's what we've been working for all these years."
Charming stepped forward, shaking his head and putting his hands on his mother's shoulders. "It's what you've been working for, Mum. I was just going along with the game. And it's over, and we lost," he explained.
"We've only LOST if you keep botching up my plans!" she argued, suddenly gone from quiet to near-shouting, and she shrugged away from him.
"Look, Mum, I'm tired of this, all right? Let me live my own life for once!" Charming replied, frustrated. Neither of them spoke for a moment, although both tempers were still flaring. Then, suddenly, he sighed and shook his head. "I appreciate all you've done for me, Mum. And I love you. But I'm not going to continue fighting a losing battle." She didn't reply, just stood glaring at him. "Anyway, I've got to go get ready."
"Get ready for what?" she asked, still irritated. Charming hesistated a moment.
"A date."
"A date!?" she exclaimed. "With whom?"
"No one, Mum. Just a girl I met at the ball last night," he replied, already edging towards the door.
"You're not dating anyone unless I've met her and approve!" she shouted, hands on her hips again.
"Mum, I am twenty-one years old. I shall date whomever I please!" he said, matching her in volume. There was a moment of tense silence, both of them clenching their jaws and fists, before Charming suddenly turned on his heel and stormed towards the door. His mother watched him walk away, and her anger crumbled away. Somehow, seeing the only family she had left in the world leaving her in such anger tore her heart in two. She just couldn't stand to fight with her little boy, pride or no pride.
"Charming!" she called after him. He paused, half-turning, and she bit her lip, at a loss for what to say. "...have a good time, pumpkin," she finally finished, her voice wavering a little. Once again, he hesitated; then he walked back towards her and hugged her. She hugged him back tightly.
"Thanks, Mum," he replied as he pulled away, smiling. Then he was gone.