An Unfair Act of Vengeance
Notes: This chapter took me a bit longer to write, and sorry it's been so long, but I was at a Speech meet Friday and Saturday, so I didn't have access to a computer. Hope I can update more soon! And please take the time to review, I always enjoy reading your thoughts and comments!
Summary: Nick talks to Sara, while Grissom gives the sheriff a piece of his mind. Afterwards O'Connor meets with the team, while Nick finally faces his parents. Alberts' plan moves closer to completion, and Catherine finds out that Kenneth Wilson is missing.
It took more effort than he expected to actually go into the room. His eyes landed on Sara who was staring silently out the window. Something about how she was trembling only seemed to make him more nervous. Great, Nick, just look at what you're doing to them… it's not enough that they had to watch you break down, now you have to kick them while they're down?
He took a few awkward steps into the room, before he found the words he needed to say.
"I-I'm sorry… God, Sara, I am… I am so sorry…"
She jumped at his voice, and her hands immediately tried to wipe away her tears. It took another few moments for his words to even register.
"Jesus, Nick… you have nothing to be sorry for." She could feel the irritation in her voice, and she was beginning to get a little frustrated by his ludicrous need to apologize.
"No, Sara… don't you dare try to even tell me that this wasn't my fault! I'm not stupid! Just because you all think I'm going to 'shatter' like a piece of glass… it doesn't mean that I can't handle the truth!" He could feel his own voice beginning to rise, and he could feel his sense of defiance growing.
"How can you say that, Nick? How can you tell us about honesty! You're the one who won't be honest with us!"
"I'm trying! I just… I just don't know what you want to hear!"
She could hear the desperation in his voice. All he wants to do is make us feel better, when he should be worrying about getting himself back together… "We just want the truth Nick!"
His eyes fell to the floor. He could distantly feel his arms and legs trembling. The truth… what if I don't even know what that is anymore? What if the truth is that I'm gone… forever, and that I can't come back?
Sara waited, but felt herself growing impatient as the awkward silence continued. "Please Nick. I don't care what the truth is. I just want to know the cold, hard truth."
"Why? What do you me say? That I'm already gone? That I've been gone ever since you guys found me in the damn coffin? What Sara? Maybe you want to hear how I might never get better? Do you really want to hear that your friend is still inside some grave out there?" He was yelling now, but he wasn't angry. Come on, Nick. Keep yourself together…
She could clearly hear the desperation, the resignation in his voice. So that's it. He's already gone. We didn't save him; he's still out there… and, by the looks of it he's probably already gone, for forever… No! Don't say it… you know better! She couldn't help herself, though. It needed to be done; she needed to know for sure.
"That's not enough, Nick. We need to know what all is going on with you!"
"I… I can't!" He gave out a loud sob before even trying to continue, "I… don't know what you want to know! What, do you want to know that I can't sleep unless someone sits right next to me and holds my freaking hand? Do you want to know that I can't control my own emotions anymore? What Sara? Isn't that more than enough? Isn't it enough that you saw me cave in over a damn computer screen? Or do you have to know that I'm still breaking apart? That I've actually looked at my gun and wondered how much better life would be for you all, without me?"
The last words hit her hard. God… he's actually contemplated suicide? No… this has gone way to far. I just don't know what to do… Her eyes began to overflow with tears once more, and she quickly ran over to Nick as he carelessly dropped to the floor. His arms were wrapped around one of the chairs, and his breath was becoming more rapid and shallow as he cried hopelessly.
"Nick… listen to me… I know you're not still inside that box. You're right here… All of you. You didn't leave anything behind… I know you didn't. You couldn't have…" She wrapped her arms around him, and tried to steady her shoulders as Nick leaned into her.
"I'm so scared… I can't help it. I'm so afraid that I'll never be… truly back…"
"I won't make any promises, Nick, but trust me… you can get through this… we're all here to help you…"
"What if it's too late? I… I don't want it to be… I just want everything to be back to normal… I don't want it to all be over…"
"You know what, Nick? If you don't want it to be gone; it won't be gone. Not forever… you just need to find whatever it is that you feel you're missing…"
"T-thanks… Sara… I wish none of this had ever happened…"
"We all do Nick. We all hate what he did… but we're not going to let him win, now are we?"
"N-no… I guess not…"
"We all love you so much Nick…"
"I… I know you guys do… I wouldn't have made it this far without all of you…"
"That's why we're here Nick. We're your friends… your second family… you can always count on us…"
"I… I know." His head sunk back into her shoulder, and he felt his arms close tightly around her. I don't want to let go… I don't want to be gone… I want to feel human again…
She couldn't hold back the tears when she felt him tighten his grip around her. Six years ago I would've called anyone insane if they said I'd be kneeling in a hospital with Nick crying into my shoulder. I would've called them insane to even suggest that Nick could be reduced to this…
He sat in shock as his mind processed the sight before him. Different photos of Nick came onto the screen. The first one showed him to be covered in blood, with his arms slightly over his face. The next was one of him clawing at the noose around his neck as blood poured from his palms all over his clothes. Then the rapid succession of photos of Nick's injuries came to an end with a final picture of Nick lying in a hospital bed. Then the reporter was back, and he shuddered at the voice.
"As you can clearly see, the situation was quite serious. Criminalist Nick Stokes was close to death when the Las Vegas Police Department managed to locate him. Now we will be replaying the press release given by Sheriff Rory Atwater earlier today."
Grissom stared intently at the small picture of Nick that was still in the corner. It was the same photo that was clipped on the inside of his file. The same photo on his ID that he had taken for granted. I didn't appreciate them enough, but I swear that's going to change. I'm going to appreciate the small things; I'm not going to let them down anymore… His mind was suddenly pulled back as he heard the sheriff's voice enter the room from the TV.
"Nick Stokes is currently attempting to recover from the traumatic series of events that began with the tragic murder of Officer Dayton of the LVPD. After numerous brutal attacks he was rescued after he had once more been buried alive. Our prime suspect, Dr. Carl Alberts, is being charged with murder, as well as assault, and kidnapping of Mr. Stokes…"
He didn't wait to hear the rest. Judging from the pictures he judged that the Sheriff had gone a bit more into the details of what had happened to Nick, not to mention the case. He had no right to divulge that information… he had no right to talk about Nick like that… He ignored the various glances in his direction, and headed down the hall towards the room where the Sheriff was still talking with various people. This is it…
"I-I guess I shouldn't make them wait anymore…"
"Y-yeah… here, I'll help you up, Nick." She slowly got back up, and carefully helped him up. Once he was standing awkwardly once more she wiped a few more tears from her eyes.
Nick painfully made his way to the door, and slowly turned around. He gave Sara a sorrowful look.
"Listen… Sara… life is… too short. You need to smile more; you need to find a way to be happy… Otherwise…"
"Otherwise what, Nick?"
"You'll end up like me…" his voice was reduced to a quiet whisper.
"I'll tell you what, Nick, if you find a way to pull through this, or if it helps you get through this… I'll try to be as happy as possible."
"Thanks, Sara… You're a great… no, a wonderful friend. You deserve so much…"
"We all do Nick. But you should go. They need you."
She watched his eyes begin to water once more. Slowly he turned to leave, and she could only sigh in relief. He's going to get better. He can make it through this…
The wheel turned slowly, and he smiled as the two wheels on the table began to move in opposite directions. As the two wheels on the table turned he checked to make sure the chains that ended with a pair of shackles on both ends was working. A quick look over his shoulder showed the others to be busy setting up a heating and air conditioning system. It's almost ready… Just time for the final touches… He slowly checked the small supply room, and made sure everything was ready.
They never heard the door open. She was crying loudly into her husband's shoulder, and he was trying hard to console her. Nick found it impossible to hold back his tears when he saw how pale both his parents were. How could I do this to them? How could I have been so selfish? I let them down… they needed to know that I was ok. What if I'm not though?
Suddenly the door behind him opened once more to reveal Dr. Gibbons. He froze when he saw Nick standing there watching his parents.
"Oh… I-I'm sorry to interrupt…" He said, and as soon as he saw Nick's parents turn in surprise he realized that they hadn't even realized their son was watching them. Without another word he quickly backed out of the room, and shut the door quickly behind him.
"Nick…"
They both stood in surprise. Nick found his legs begin to wobble, and found it nearly impossible to look back up at his parents who had moved over to him. Without warning his strength gave out, and his crutches fell to the ground as he began to fall. He could feel his father's arms quickly reach out and they pulled him back up.
"I-I'm so… I'm sorry… you've g-g-got to believe me…"
"You've been apologizing for too long..."
"No… it's not… I'm so sorry…"
"Listen to me, Nick," He noticed Nick's head rise a bit more as the realization that he hadn't used his nickname sunk in, "I am so proud of you, Nick. I should've told you so many times, but I was so blind…"
"Cisco…"
"No, Nick… you're a man now. You're not 'Pancho' anymore, and I'm not 'Cisco'… not really. You've made us so proud… we love you so much…"
"I… I love you both… I'm sorry… I shouldn't have shut you out… I shouldn't have caused you more pain…"
"It's ok, Nick. You don't have anything to be sorry about."
"Catherine! I've got some seriously bad news!"
"Vega? I thought you were back at the lab tracking people down…"
"I was, but then we found that two officers were missing."
"Oh, God… did you find them?"
"Yeah… but… they were the officers guarding Kenneth Wilson."
"Are they ok?"
"We found them unconscious, but they'll be fine. On the other hand Kenneth Wilson is missing. I've already put out an APB for him…"
"Oh God… they're just never going to stop are they?"
"Well, at least Sofia managed to get rid of one of them…"
"Yeah, and now there's only four more to go…"
"Well, I've got to get back to the lab, Catherine. We're following through, and dayshift is covering this scene… how is he?"
"Nick's getting better, but slowly. As for everyone in the explosion they're being released right about now. In fact I was just going to go meet Brass and the team in the break room here."
"Doctor's letting you do that huh?"
"Dr. Gibbons offered us whatever we needed, so we took him up on it."
"Ok, well, I'm out of here. Give the team my regards…"
"Sure thing, oh, and, Sam?" she waited until he turned back around before she finished, "Find them, and do whatever it takes to get them. Within the law, of course…"
"We're going to get them, Catherine. I promise."
"I expect nothing less. Now go on, you're not doing much good in this hallway…"
"Who the hell do you think you are? You had no right to give out that information! You had no right to plaster those photos all over the damn news!" Grissom knew he was making a scene, and doing this with the sheriff usually had bad outcomes, but right now he didn't care. Screw this job if it means that I have to be shameless about how Nick's privacy is handled…
"Excuse me, but I think you'd better calm down for your own sake." He replied testily as his eyes shifted to the people in the room. The last thing I need right now is a scene…
"I don't care about what you're going to do to me or my job! I care about Nick! I swear I will not stand by, and just watch as you allow pictures of my friend during the hardest time of his entire life to be broadcast for anyone to see! And I will definitely not stand by while you take what little privacy and dignity he might still have by telling the entire world that he's fragile, and 'barely recovering'!"
"I will not tolerate being berated like this in public Grissom!" He was shouting now as well, and everyone in the room was looking at them in shock.
"You selfish asshole! You don't even have the slightest clue as to what he and his family are going through! You don't even care!" He stormed out of the room, and slammed the door shut behind him. God, that felt good… at least for now. How am I supposed to explain this to Catherine? He suddenly looked down at his watch and groaned. And now I'm gonna be late…
Catherine sat across from Warrick and Sara while Greg paced nervously behind her. She had told them about Wilson's escape while they waited for Grissom and the DA to arrive. Warrick's eyes were red, and she could clearly see the faint trail of dried tears shimmer in the bright light of the hospital break room. They're barely holding on. If we lose Nick now… it's all over.
"Sorry I'm late…" they all froze as they gloomily allowed their eyes to settle on Grissom's disheveled appearance and Jacob as they walked quickly inside before locking the door behind them.
"Ok, look, the trial is only a few days away. I know none of you are eager to relive those events, but we need all your testimonies."
"Yeah… I think we all got it down…"
"I'm sure you do Catherine, but please, just keep your accounts straight…"
"What about Nick?" Greg finally asked, unable to keep the question back.
"I was just going to talk to him about this Greg. It's entirely optional for him…"
"Like hell it is Grissom! You know just as well as we do that if you ask him he's going to feel compelled to do it! All because he doesn't want to let us down… if you ask him at all… you're not giving him the choice. You'll be making it for him. I just hope you're ready for what that could do to him."
"Warrick, I know what kind of effects this could have. He could freak out and lose it by merely seeing Alberts again, or it could help him move on. It could give him a sense of closure, and I think it's fair to say that Nick would at least want to be asked. How is he going to feel if we all just keep this from him, and make him feel as if we don't think he can handle it? We have to at least give him the option."
"Oh Nick… it's so good to… just to see you…"
"Yeah… you too, Mom."
"I just… I don't know… I feel so helpless…"
"Jillian, we agreed not to bring that up…"
"Well, it's too late now… What happened?"
"We… we overheard…" Jillian started, but couldn't bring herself to finish.
"You know. I-I know… I should've told you both… I'm sorry…"
"Nick, you don't need to be sorry…"
"Yes I do! What if she did that to someone else's kid for God's sake? If I'd told you, or someone… she could've been arrested… or something…"
"It's ok Nick. She was arrested… charged… the whole nine yards."
"H-how?"
"I called back, and Dan Richards told me… said it was an 'anonymous' source. In other words your brother, Nick. You've got nothing to be sorry for. Absolutely nothing, Nick…"
"I… I love you… both of you so much…" He felt his embrace with his parents tighten, and they slowly pulled back when they heard the door open.
"I'm sorry… I, uh… didn't know…"
"It's ok, Griss. I think everything we needed to say was said."
"Look, Nick, we're going to head back to the hotel, ok? I promise we'll call, so we can see you again before we have to leave… and your siblings all wanted to say 'hi', and 'get well soon'."
"Thanks, Dad… I'll see you soon then… I guess."
He forced a smile, and couldn't fight off a few more tears as he hugged his mom once more, and as his father walked past him Grissom could distinctly slowly read the Judge's lips.
"You're my 'Cisco', now Nick… I couldn't be more proud of you."
In response Nick pulled his father into a long hug, before reluctantly letting him go. Grissom smiled softly in a miserable attempt to comfort the Texan. Once the door left he moved a chair over for Nick to sit in.
"You look like you could use a break…" He offered quietly as he propped the now useless crutches up against a table, and he finally sat down in a chair across from Nick.
"I… want to testify… I don't know when the trial is… but… I have to face him. I have to help take him down…"
"I suppose you just made my job easier Nick seeing as that was part of why I'm sitting here now. I just want you to know… you don't have to do it. You've got nothing to prove to anyone, Nick. So, please, if you agree to this, please let it be because you need some type of closure…"
"O-ok, Griss… I-I can't thank you enough…" He painfully moved towards his supervisor, and pulled him into a quick hug.
He wasn't used to this kind of contact. It was something he had practically avoided since he was a kid. It doesn't matter… Maybe I can get used to this, hell, right now I think I'd do just about anything if it'd help him… He looked into Nick's eyes as he felt the younger man release his grip, and they shared a quick heartfelt smile before Nick broke the comforting silence.
"C-can you take me to the… uh… to the morgue? I… I just need to see their bodies… I can't explain why… maybe, just… just some type of closure…"
"Sure, Nick… we'll go whenever you're ready…"
"Is she here yet?"
"No, Eric, she just called, she was a bit late, so she headed straight over to the hospital."
"Ok, Kenny, this is going to play right into our hands… Nothing they do can stop us now…"
"I'm Gil Grissom, this is Nick Stokes, from the Crime Lab… we're just here to take a look at a few bodies… for… well, closure…"
Nick stood uncomfortably behind Grissom. Thank God he decided to do all the talking… I don't think I could handle it…
"Ok, so the bodies of Richard Dayton, and Harold Rogers…"
"Excuse me, but what do you want with our son!" They all turned to see an angry looking couple standing behind them.
To Be Continued…
Next Chapter: Nick and Grissom talk to Officer Dayton's parents, and once they leave Nick and Grissom go to see the bodies. Meanwhile, Catherine gets news of another missing employee from Alberts' institution, and that the new missing employee is already in Vegas. Nick and Grissom find themselves in severe danger, while the rest of the team works frantically to try and stop the situation from getting any worse. Sheriff Atwater finds himself once more publicly embarrassed as the media continues to pick at the story.