Two Men and a Baby.
"…Dammit James, I am your wife! I'm sick and tired of coming second place to him! It's enough that you have to work every hour of the day and that you choose to spend it with him, but I have had this trip booked for weeks. I asked you to keep this weekend free for Sean and now because you want to drink beer and cover the upholstery in pizza stains you think I should cancel?" Julie was irate and this was a bad position for Wilson to be in. He could never win an argument with her and was always the one who apologised. He couldn't let House hear him back down.
"Look Julie, I'm not suggesting that you cancel, I'm just suggesting we get a baby sitter for one night! It won't hurt!" By the time he had finished speaking Wilson knew he could not win, he had known from the beginning of the argument that he could not win and was ready to back down, but Julie wasn't finished yet.
"He is your nephew James. You are his uncle; you need to have some input. If I find out from anyone that you have passed him off to a friend or babysitter you will be in SERIOUS trouble! Do you understand!" Wilson knew he had to back down in order to end this. He hung his head in defeat.
"Fine I get it" At that statement Julie went out the door with a self satisfied smirk on her face. Wilson shut the door behind her and rested his head on the frame. He really couldn't be bothered to argue. It was just easier all round to let her win.
"You really told her there Jimmy! I'm going to have to be more careful about having an argument with you in future" Greg Houses voice sounded from the front room. Wilson sighed, he knew he was going to get stick from House about backing down.
"What? Would you prefer we were still standing here arguing? Wait, don't answer that, you like to hear about how you are the main catalyst in the breakdown of our marriage" He wasn't really kidding about that, Julie really hated Greg. She knew that he came first.
"Ouch. You know your words are like a dagger through my heart!"
"Really? That's interesting; I didn't think that daggers could pierce stone…"
"Ouch. Touché." House raised his hands in defeat and looked at Wilson who was still standing to the side.
"The problem we have now is what do we do with that?" House lifted his cane and used it to point to the infant laying on the play mat.
"He is not a "that" House. He is my nephew, and….. I have no idea what to do with him…" He sighed and moved forward towards the child. "He's only eighteen months…how much can he do anyway? It won't be that bad, he'll probably sleep for most of the weekend, and we can still watch the game. How about you stay here for a few days and we'll make a party of it." House considered the offer carefully. Wilson obviously didn't want to be alone with the child, and House felt his pain. Hell, he didn't want to be within a block of it.
"Do we still get beer and pizza?" House asked hopefully. Wilson knew that this was House's own way of agreeing and he moved towards the couch and sat.
"This could be interesting….I really hope that this isn't a subtle hint from Julie that she wants kids…I don't think I'm strong enough for that."
House regarded him with a fake sense of glee.
"Ooh I'll be their Uncle Greg! You could name one or two after me! We could dress them up in matching Sound of Music cloths and teach them to sing! I could teach them to talk!"
Greg, stop talking. Now. No one in their right mind would let you near a child who is about to say its first words. No one wants a cursing child.
"Ga!" The little boy's attention was focused on Wilson and House. One could assume that he was wondering who this other strange man was with Uncle Jimmy, and why did he have a long stick?
House and Wilson looked at each other, and then back down at Sean. It was going to be an interesting weekend for all concerned.