I'm really sorry. I didn't realize it was so long since my last update.

Chapter Thirty: Tried To Go On Like I Never Knew You

"Brooke!" Peyton called across the school courtyard. It was Monday morning and this was the first time Peyton had seen her friend since she slammed the door on her at the weekend. "Brooke!" Peyton tried again.

Her friend continued walking as if she'd never heard Peyton's cries. Peyton managed to jog up to Brooke, a little out of breath, but determined to talk to her.

"Brooke, can we just talk?" she requested.

"Make it quick," she snapped, stepping up the speed of her walk.

"Well, could you stop walking away from me then?" Peyton asked. Brooke slowed down her walk and let out a deep sigh as she came to a stop.

"What?" she said in an exasperated tone.

"I know you're mad-" Peyton began.

"Oooh, score one for Blondie. Tell me something I don't know," Brooke said as she began to walk away again. Peyton stepped in front of her to try and stop her from leaving.

"I can understand that you're upset but what I don't understand is why you're avoiding me and Haley… and Nathan… and Jake... pretty much everyone."

Brooke scowled, "You all lied to me. You knew what Lucas did and none of you said anything. You all let me carry on like the idiot that I am and think nothing was wrong. Bet you all had a great laugh over that one, right?"

"Brooke, we didn't mean for you to find out like that. We thought Lucas was going to tell you when you got back but he didn't and then it was your birthday… it just went too far." Peyton told her.

"Yeah, right. Do you know what really bites? I thought I could trust you and Haley. I thought that when it came down to it, you'd be on my side. Instead, you're covering for Lucas. Guess I got that wrong too."

"This is not about choosing sides, Brooke."

Brooke sighed again getting more impatient.

"Well tell it to someone who cares. I'm done with all of you," Brooke told her former friend as she walked past Peyton and off on her own. Peyton stared after her, joined by Haley a few moments later.

"How is she doing?" Haley asked as she too watched Brooke disappear into the distance.

"She's pissed."

"At Lucas?"

"At everyone."

Haley nodded, "Maybe I should talk to her."

Peyton shrugged, "She's all yours, dude."

-----

Brooke groaned loudly as she made yet another mistake on her English assignment. She scribbled out the paragraphed she'd written out before pulling the page out and forming it into a ball, using all her strength and anger to make it into a teeny tiny ball.

It was amazing how therapeutic it was.

She threw it across the library floor and didn't seem to mind when it narrowly missed the group of girls who had been staring at her and whispering since the moment she'd walked in.

Gossip traveled quick in this small town.

It wasn't New York anymore.

Suddenly, Brooke felt the urge to want the big city where no-one would care if your loser boyfriend cheated on you with some two-bit slut.

Instead she was stuck in a small library in a school where everyone knew each other and scandals lasted for weeks.

She tried her best to ignore the gasps of people who only found out that-

"Oh my gosh! They broke up?" someone cried before they were hushed by their friends to keep their voice down.

"I heard she's pregnant."

"Oh please! I bet he cheated on her with that Peyton girl. Guys always fall for their girlfriend's best friend."

"Yeah,because that's totally believable. I think she's the one who cheated on him."

"No one in their right mind would ever cheat on Lucas Scott."

"Maybe he's gay!"

The group descended into giggles and sniggers. Brooke had had enough. She popped her head up from the desk she was sitting at and peered over the group.

"Maybe you stupid freshmen should mind your own business unless you'd like me to spread rumors of my own cos we haven't had a good teacher/student rumor in a while."

She arched an eyebrow at the group whose grins were quickly replaced by solemn and sheepish looks. Brooke rolled her eyes and sat back in her seat.

She'd only just settled back into writing her essay when a shadow loomed over her.

"What do you want?" she snapped without bothering to look up.

"Can I sit?" the voice of Haley James – her former friend – asked. Brooke sighed.

"If you want."

Haley did so. So far, so good.

"I ju-" she began.

"Whoa, did I say that you could talk?" Brooke questioned as she turned back to her essay. Haley was stunned. This was a side she'd never really seen of Brooke's before.

Well, not directly aimed at her anyway.

After a mere five minutes of neither of them talking, Haley realized Brooke was really serious about it.

"This is stupid," Haley said finally.

"This is a library. Keep your voice down."

"You can't keep ignoring us forever, Brooke," Haley told her, "I mean, you have to understand that we were just trying to protect you."

"By lying?"

"Yes by ly… no! That's not what I meant!" Haley began to get confused. "Look, we're sorry, okay? Can you just forgive us or something? We're still your friends, even if you don't want to be ours."

"You know," Brooke said as she turned her full attention on the girl in front of her, "Funnily enough, I don't need friends who stab me in the back."

With those words, Brooke hastily packed up her things and walked out of the library, earning looks from the other students as she walked by. Haley sighed and put her head in her hands.

They had all screwed up.

-----

Brooke Davis was frustrated. She had all this pent up anger and hurt inside of her and no outlet for it.

There was only so much she could yell at the cheerleading squad for.

After one particular girl was fed up and muttered a little too loudly; "Geez, what did Lucas do to piss you off so much?" Brooke had had enough and launched into a scathing tirade against the girl in the middle of the school gym, before she stormed out, leaving a stunned squad staring after her.

Brooke stalked out of the gym with her duffel bag and frantically searched for her car keys so she could make a quick exit.

As she found them, she spied a familiar blonde head in the distance. Her eyes narrowing, she cut across the courtyard and began walking towards the girl.

"Hey!" she yelled, getting the girl's attention, "I've got to talk to you."

"Are you talking to me?" the girl asked.

"Are you a two-bit whore? Then yes," Brooke said. "He was drunk!"

The girl studied Brooke for a few moments before she smiled.

"Oh, Brooke, right?"

"That's right. And he was drunk."

"Your boyfriend?"

"Ex-boyfriend," Brooke corrected.

"Right. Well, sorry about that," Sarah said a little dismissively as she tried to get past Brooke. Brooke stopped her.

"Do you not even care about that? He wasn't even conscious. That's like r-"

"Rape, yeah, yeah. I heard all this from those two girls you hang around with."

"How can you be so calm about this? Do you even care about the pain you've caused? I had to give away perfectly good diamond jewelry because of what he did… or rather, what you did to him," Brooke ranted. Sarah sighed.

"Look, I'm sorry that I had a good time. I didn't see your name written all over him. Plus, I didn't see you around anywhere. He drank all those drinks by himself. I did nothing."

"Except take advantage of him when he was vulnerable. You're a bitch!" Brooke spat out. Sarah just rolled her eyes.

"Okay, I get that you're angry and hurt and whatever. But think of it this way, even though he was drunk, even though I 'took advantage' of him – would you forgive him? I mean, he still cheated. It doesn't really matter if he was drunk or not."

Brooke thought about it and her silence seemed to confirm the answer for Sarah.

"Look, I'm sorry for what happened, but no-one can take it back. You can either move forward with your life, or you could dwell on the fact that people screw up sometimes. Make a choice."

Sarah walked away, leaving a shell-shocked and contemplative Brooke in her wake.

-----

Whitey shook his head as he watched Lucas miss yet another shot that he would easily sail through. Lucas cursed under his breath and Whitey could do nothing but blow the whistle and call a time out. They were losing badly to a team that they'd always defeated in previous years.

The team jogged up to Whitey, Lucas looking especially tired and exhausted.

"Sorry, Coach," he apologized, knowing that he'd let the team down.

"I can see that," Whitey grumbled, "What is up with you tonight, Scott?"

Lucas just shook his head, trying to come up with a suitable explanation. Somehow, he gathered that 'My girlfriend is pissed at me' wouldn't be the right response.

"Sit down," Whitey instructed, "You're benched. Collins, you're in for Scott."

"But Coach…" Lucas tried to argue, even though he knew it was for the best.

"Sit down, Scott, or I'll send you to the locker room. You can't do much for the team when you're playing half-heartedly."

Lucas gave him a reluctant nod and sat down, but not before seeing the unimpressed expression fixed on his father's face as she stared at him from the sidelines. Lucas looked away and cast his eyes to where the cheerleaders stood.

One important one was missing from the group.

He met Peyton's sad gaze as she shook her head and gave him a small shrug. Gulping hard, Lucas looked down at the wooden floorboards of the school gym, and dreaded going home.

-----

"That was a piss-poor performance, Lucas! Do you realize that we have college scouts coming soon and if they see that… half-assed display of whatever it was, you'll have no chance in hell of getting a scholarship? Are you willing you put your whole future on the line because you broke up with your girlfriend?" Dan Scott had been yelling at his son from the minute the final game whistle was blown.

Lucas had learnt to try and filter the insults and snide comments out and just nod when needed to.

"Dan…" Karen tried to calm her husband down, "It was one bad game."

"Yeah, well I'd better not see anything like that again or there will be hell to play. Tomorrow morning you're getting up early and working yourself down to the ground. I don't want any of your excuses…"

Finally, they pulled up to the house and Lucas jumped at the chance of getting out of the car.

"…do you hear me?" he could hear his father's rant still continuing.

"Yeah!" Lucas yelled back, hoping it would be the end of the argument. Dan seemed satisfied with his answer and decided to quietly seethe in the solitude of his study.

Karen sighed as both her son and husband shut themselves off from each other in their respective rooms.

She loved watching Lucas play but couldn't stand Dan's criticisms, even if Lucas had played particularly well; Dan always had something to say.

Sighing, Karen decided to avoid the men of the house until both had calmed down and search for Brooke, who had not been at the game.

She knocked lightly on Brooke's door and waited for a reply that never came. She frowned and knocked harder.

"What's going on?" Lucas asked when he spotted his mother outside Brooke's door.

"Have you seen Brooke since you came home?" Karen asked. Lucas shook his head.

"Maybe she went out," Lucas suggested. Karen nodded.

"Maybe. Well, if you hear from her…" Karen said to lucks, even though she knew the chances of Brooke calling Lucas in the current situation were pretty slim. Lucas nodded and Karen walked away into her own bedroom.

Lucas opened the door of Brooke's bedroom. He knew she'd probably gone out. To where? He didn't know.

He surveyed the room that looked empty, cold and bleak now that there were no pictures of her friends adorning the wall. Clothes were strewn everywhere and there were bottles of nail polish and make-up covering every inch of her dressing table.

Lucas sat down slowly on the edge of the bed he was usually welcome on and let out a deep sigh.

It still smelt of her.

Lucas could almost imagine himself lying down on the bed with Brooke resting her head on his torso while reading out questions from Cosmo,despite his protests. The memory brought a smile to his lips.

He lingered in a room a little while longer before letting himself out and shutting the door on what used to be one of his favorite places.

-----

Brooke stirred her cocktail in a bored manner. She loved going out to clubs, even though she hadn't done it for a while. But she didn't like doing it alone. Or angry.

An average looking guy sat down beside her to try his luck. She gave him one unimpressed look, his smile instantly faded and he went away with his tail between his legs.

"Another drink?" the bartender asked. Brooke nodded.

"What time is it?" Brooke asked.

"Almost 11pm," the bartender replied as she fixed Brooke her drink, "Why? Do you have some place to be?"

"Hmmm, let's see. I could go home where my cheating ex-boyfriend is just across the hall from me, or I could go to my friend's house – but oops! All of them lied to me."

"Ouch," the bartender sympathized with Brooke, "Is there a third option?"

"Get drunk."

"Drown your sorrows, huh?"

"Nope," Brooke declared. The bartender raised an inquisitive eyebrow, "I have made a choice. I'm going to move forward and on with my life… without backstabbing friends and cheating boyfriends – and if drowning my sorrows is a part of that, then so be it."

The bartender smiled, "Brave girl."

"Stupid girl, more like," Brooke's smile faltered and she sighed.

"Hey, don't beat yourself up over it. You said so yourself, you're better off without them."

"It sucks. I just want to go home."

"I could call you a cab…" the bartender offered.

"No, I want to go home-home. New York home. I had a great penthouse apartment. But I gave it all up for this place. Typical story. Girl meets boy. Boy hates girl. Girl hates boy. Boy is good-looking and puts charm on girl. Girl falls. Everything is rainbows and sunshine. Girl stupidly goes to see parents. Boy gets mad drunk and sleeps with blond slut. Boy and friends lie. Boy tells girl on her birthday. Girl all alone," Brooke babbled.

"Sounds like a really bad episode of 'Dawson's Creek'," the bartender chuckled. Brooke shrugged.

"I think I'll have another drink," Brooke told the bartended.

-----

Lucas lay awake in the darkness. He craned his neck to see the time displayed on his alarm clock.

2.17am.

He wasn't sure if Brooke was home yet. He hadn't heard her bedroom door open.

Maybe she met a guy.

Lucas shook the thought out of his head.

No, she was probably staying at Theresa's house. Or Bevin's. Brooke was good friends with both girls.

He knew he should probably get some sleep, but every time he closed his eyes, they kept showing him Brooke's crushed expression from her birthday.

He thought that telling her about his mistake would alleviate some of the guilt, but instead it made things worse.

Lucas frowned as he heard the snapping of twigs from outside his window.

"Dammit!" someone hissed as there was a dull thud. Lucas sat up and peered out of his bedroom window.

"Brooke?" he whispered at the figure. She looked up. "What the hell?" Lucas opened his bedroom window and looked at her. She frowned at him.

"Lucasssss…" she slurred as she tried to keep herself standing on her feet.

"Are you drunk?" he asked her. She shrugged.

"I had a few drinks."

"Yeah, a few too many," Lucas replied.

"Are you going to criticize me all night or let me in? I forgot my key," Brooke said. Lucas sighed. This had happened once before; way before they'd started dating. Although it wasn't so late at night and she wasn't drunk.

"Give me your hands," he told her as he reached out of the window, thanking the fact that their house only had one floor. Brooke reached up and Lucas grabbed her hands to help her climb up the few feet. She struggled slightly in her heels and mid-length skirt but with Lucas' assistance, she managed to get through.

"I swear this house is growing," she muttered as Lucas helped steady her. "I didn't realize it was so hard to climb through a window."

"It isn't if you're sober," Lucas shot back. Brooke just rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. I'm going to my room."

"Not even a 'thank you'?" Lucas asked.

"Thank you," Brooke said sarcastically, "Thank you for making the last few days of my life hell, and reminding me that I'm meant to be bitter and alone."

"Brooke…" Lucas began feeling guilty again.

"Forget it, Lucas," Brooke said. "Just forget everything. I'm going to my room."

Lucas watched as Brooke managed to creep across the hall and enter her bedroom without stumbling or making too much of a noise.

Lucas put his hands on his head and hoped that Brooke wouldn't develop this into a habit.

And if she did; it would only be himself to blame.

To Be Continued…