A/N: Thanks for the reviews for the last chapter. But, I'm sure there's a lot of silent readers out there, so can you please do me a little favor and review to atleast tell me you're reading? Anyways, on with the story!

Jess and Rory made their way to the front of Lane and Dave's apartment. Rory was glad that Lane finally got what she wanted. Dave had come back just a year ago, and they were going so well together. She was happy because her best friend was happy, also they saw each other way more because Lane didn't have to be all depressed anymore.

Jess had seen Lane and Dave also, Rory didn't know this, but he had. He always had liked Dave, so they started hanging out. Lane grew on him, and they eventually could get together with no blood shed. They also sometimes babysat for him when he needed to relax.

He knocked on the door for the fifth time, but they weren't answering.

"Ring the doorbell." Rory pleaded.

"They don't like it when you ring the doorbell... something about it wasting electricity. They had a whole discussion about it last time I was over." Jess sighed, taking her hand off the doorbell.

"What?"

"You don't want me to repeat all that again, do you?"

"Wait, you came over here?"

"Yes." Jess nodded. "Why do you seem so surprised?"

"Sorry, it's just... you never seemed to like Lane much..." Rory drifted off, biting her lip. "It just, took me by surprise. But, I'm glad. I wanted you guys to get along since day one. She is my best friend and you are...umm...used to be...umm..."

"You can stop your babbling. I get it." Jess smirked.

"Let's just go in then. I'm sure Lane won't mind."

Jess nodded, and opened the door. He followed her into the living room where they found the couple "coupling" in the middle of the living room. Rory put her hand over her mouth in shock, and Jess smirked. Rory hesitated, then turned to leave the room, Jess followed her outside and closed the door softly.

"Oh my god." Rory blushed.

"Man, why are you blushing? It was them who were mating in the middle of the living room." Jess laughed. They started to make their way down the sidewalk aimlessly.

"They were not mating, Jess. Lane can't... uhm... until she gets married." Rory said awkwardly.

"And why is that?"

"Because she said that Mama Kim is in her head when she told her that you can't have sex before marriage." Rory laughed. Jess rolled his eyes, and sighed. "What? Not everyone can be a slut like me..."

"Slut? You? Right."

"What?" Rory smirked. "I had sex with two guys in the same year. That's a little bit slutty."

"It is not, Rory."

"Whatever." Rory smiled.

"Jess!" Ms. Patty called after them. "Jess!" She said without breath. It seemed that she had been after them for a while. They both turned around, Rory gave her a friendly smile. "Hello, Rory. Jess, I have been looking for you everywhere."

"Well, you found me. What can I do for you, Patty?"

"Actually, I have a phone number for you–," Patty smiled wickedly.

Rory gave Jess a questioning glance. "Umm, what is she talking about?" She whispered to him.

"I am not going on a blind date." Jess said firmly.

"You know, you deserve a nice girl, you can't hope that they find you." Ms. Patty gave her a stern look.

'Yeah, he does! He deserves to be with me. Not with whomever he is going to go on a date with. God, why am I being so jealous? I should just let him be and be happy. That's what I want... right?' Rory thought to herself.

Jess caught her alarmed expression and smirked.

"Sure." Jess stated.

"What?" They both exclaimed at the same time.

"Who is the nice girl that you want me to go on a date with?"

"Oh, great! She is one of my friends' daughters. She is just adorable, her name is Lea. You will just love her!"

Love. The word hung in the air dryly. They had love, but supposedly not anymore. Nope, it was gone... at least they wanted it to be gone. It had to be gone. Vanished forever,

"Umm, yeah. I'm sure I will. Give me her phone number and I'll give her a call." Jess nodded. He didn't believe he just did that... but he wanted to. He wanted to cause her pain. Cause her pain like she had to him. He saw the hurt expression on her face as Ms. Patty handed him the little piece of paper. He knew he shouldn't be doing this, but if he had to feel this, she did too. "Thanks." He said softly.

"I'll be by the diner later. Tootles!" Ms. Patty smiled, and then she was off.

Rory stood there, looking at him, the pained look still painted on her face. He wouldn't make eye contact and she knew that he was doing this to hurt her. Make her feel pain.

"So... what was that?" Rory asked, not with anger, but with interest.

"I got a date."

"Congratulations."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Oh, are you not happy about this whole date thing?" Jess asked, with anger. "Because, I truly think that this is great. I need to go out, and being with umm, Lea could be great."

He couldn't even think of life with anyone else but Rory. But, if she was going to be difficult, then so was he.

"I am happy for you." Rory's eyes softened a little.

"Don't." Jess sighed.

"What? All I said was that I was happy for you."

"Don't be happy for me." Jess gave her a stern look. She looked confused, but not really. Is that even possible? But, they both learned that everything was possible at this point. "Stop with the fake smiles and everything. Be fucking mad for once in your life. And show it!"

She stood there. That was all she could do. He walked away after that, leaving her in the cold, looking after him. She soon was looking at nothing but the street. She sighed. She was angry. Angry at herself.

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It was that night. And everyone in the Danes' household knew what that night was. The night where Jess would be going to dinner with Lea. Everyone hated her name. Jess was angry because everyone practically yelled at him for having his own life. He needed closure, he thought Lea was closure. Who knows? Maybe he will find closure in this girl.

"Give daddy a hug." Jess smiled at his kids. They both ran over and hugged him tightly. Rory just stood there in the doorway, watching them say their goodbyes. Biting her lip, almost to the point where it would start to bleed.

"Daddy, why are you going out with this stupid girl?" Hannah pouted.

"Yeah. Why can't you stay here with us and mommy?" Nick asked.

"Lea is not stupid. And it's only one night. I will be back later and you will see me in the morning. I swear. Pinky promise." Jess smiled as they both did the pinky thing. "I love you both. Goodnight."

"Love you too!" They both echoed.

Jess stood up from his position and went to the door where Rory was. He pulled her into a hug. It wasn't awkward. But, it was filled of hate instead of love, emptiness.

"I love you." Jess stated. She knew he meant it.

"I love you too." Rory nodded. He knew she meant it.

It was already at the point where they would say it to each other every night. They needed to say these things to each other so they wouldn't start to break down and cry in the middle of any conversation. He needed her, and she needed him. It was enough for now.

She smiled fakely at him.

"Don't do that." Jess sighed.

"Sorry." Rory caught herself, and sighed also. "Can't I smile when I feel the need to smile?"

"I like it when you smile and you don't have to."

"Okay." One simple word.

"Bye." Jess waved, and walked out the door.

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"Jess, I had a really nice time tonight." Lea smiled. They were on the Danes' porch. Both saying a nice goodbye. That was the night for you, described in one word. Nice.

"Me too." Jess nodded.

"Alright, well, if ya ever get lonely, call me. Okay?"

Lonely. That described every day of his life. Sure, he had Hannah, Nick, Lorelai, Luke. Rory. Rory. Rory. He couldn't stop thinking about her. He didn't want to cause her pain anymore. He never wanted to. It was just making him feel like a piece of crap.

"Uh-huh," Jess nodded once again. She smiled and pressed her lips on his'. His heart stopped. He didn't want this. Last time somebody's lips had been on his' was Rory's. He didn't want to let go of that. He wanted to feel her lips, and taste her. But, instead of pulling away, he held on tighter, pulling her closer.

"Oh, sorry!" Lorelai exclaimed, as she opened to the door. She didn't know that they were out there and she had stepped in on this. It disgusted her. Not because she didn't like Lea. But, because Rory loved him and he did too. But, there he was kissing Lea.

"Don't worry about it." Lea smiled sweetly, but her cheeks red of embarrassment.

This reminded him of Rory. When they first started dating, she had innocence and whenever anything bad or embarrassing happened to them, she would blush. She was this way now... but, her innocence wasn't there anymore. And he was afraid that it was him who had taken it from her. Maybe it had been him.

"Umm, okay." Lorelai bit her lip. She had no clue what to do in this situation.

"Bye Lea. I will call you." Jess pressed his lips against hers' again. Just to spite Lorelai. Lea smiled, then she was out of there. Lorelai shook her head in disbelief. He went past her and into the house. She closed the door, but looked at him closely.

"What were you doing?"

"Kissing Lea."

"You can't kiss Lea, Jess!"

"Why the hell not?"

"Oh, you know why. But, whatever. I am definitely staying out of this mess that you have created for yourself." Lorelai exclaimed. They stood there. "You tell her you love her." She whispered, he could see tears coming down her cheeks.

"I do."

Lorelai looked up. It was the first time he had full on seen Lorelai cry in front of him like that. She nodded simply and shrugged, letting out a bitter laugh.

"Goodnight." She said forcefully and then she ran up the stairs.

He was feeling afraid. Afraid that Lorelai didn't yell at him or make him apologize. Afraid that he wasn't worth it, Lorelai didn't need to waste her time on him.

He sighed. That night had been a long night for him and he couldn't wait to go to sleep. He moved quickly across the house until he opened the door to Rory's old room, where he found Rory sitting on the edge of the bed.

She knew was there and she turned to face him. Her face was stained with tears.

"I heard you and mom screaming. Did you have fun?" She asked softly.

"Yes. She's nice."

"Good." Rory nodded. "Why did my mom yell at you?"

"She caught us kissing."

Ouch. That just hit her in the gut. She tried to think of anything in the world that wouldn't make her cry in this moment. She remembered. He hated it when she cried.

That's when the fake smile turned into crying, and the crying turned into sobbing.

He didn't hold her. He knew she needed to cry. She told him. She told him that she needed to cry for him every night. He let her, taking off his shoes quietly.

"Rory." He spoke her name quietly.

She didn't say anything. She just walked across the room and placed her lips on his'.

"What are you doing?" He pulled away softly.

"It hurt." She whispered, kissing him again.

"Rory. Stop." Jess exclaimed. Rory sighed, still crying, she just sat on the floor. Her head rested on the back of the bed. Jess bit his lip, but carried her over to the bed, he sat down, her on top of his lap. She put her head on his shoulder.

"I hate you. You weren't supposed to be with her. It was supposed to be me! Me, Jess!" Rory punched into his chest, but he held her even closer. She broke down into tears again soon. "I hate you."

"Rory..." Jess whispered, kissing her head. "I needed to go out. I need to date someone other than you. It hurts too much. You understand that."

"No, I don't! I really don't." Rory said forcefully, as she got up from his lap. "I really want to, but I can't. You are supposed to be mine!"

"There is no written rule about it, Rory. It's you being selfish. About my feelings! Am I supposed to go through life pining for you? Waiting until you are ready? No. I'm not gonna do it."

"Then don't tell me you love every night!" Rory choked. "I hate you. I don't love you...hate turned into love tonight."

"You don't mean that!"

"You don't know what I mean, Jess. Not anymore. Your not with me and I'm not with you! Guess what? This is what it feels like!"

"I'm not trying to hurt you."

"Yes, you are! Don't lie. You told me never to lie...so, why can't you keep your own promise? Huh?" Rory sobbed. "I know why...because, everything! Everything is all empty promises with you."

"Rory." Jess stood up.

"Get away from me." Rory exclaimed.

"Rory, stop!"

"I'm not gonna stop! I don't want to stop! I want to yell at you, and I want you to be hurt, I want you to cry like I have to every freaking night!"

"I am already hurt, Rory. You hurt me. At the bridge when you told me your story, it hurt like hell! I wanted to kill myself. You were in pain because of me. So much pain. Don't you get it? God dammit!"

"Don't swear." Rory whispered. "The kids are just upstairs...don't swear."

"Tonight. I had to do tonight. Lea is nice...I had a fine time." Jess sighed. "I am not going to take your happiness into consideration, because every time I do that, you end up with everything you want. I can't have that. I need you to stay away from me, so you can have a normal life. With Nick and with Lorelai and Luke–,"

"I'm not going to be happy until your with me!"

"And that is why I can't take your happiness into consideration."

"A normal life?" Rory snorted. "What about Hannah? Did you just forget about her? I am her mother, what is she going to say when I'm not around, huh?"

"You are not her mother."

At that moment, Jess could see the light had gone out of her eyes. And that was when she got into her bed, turned out the lights and went to sleep.

"Dammit!" He kicked the desk with force.

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The next morning had been crickets, nobody said anything to each other. They all heard the fight. The fight. Rory just stayed with the kids, Jess had the day off at the diner, so he didn't have to go. He just shadowed Rory and the kids.

"Hello everybody!" Sookie smiled as she entered the Danes' household. They were all in the living room, Rory was on the floor with the kids and Jess just sat on the couch watching.

"Sookie!" Rory smiled and went to give the woman a hug.

"How are all my little ankle bitters?" Sookie giggled at the kids.

"Oh, great. We're trying to make up some game because apparently they are bored." Rory sighed. The kids simply nodded. "We still have nothing."

"Well, I have a great proposition for you..."

"Yes?"

"I was thinking that maybe the kids would like to come over to my house and they could play with Davey and Martha. They would love some company."

"Yea, mommy can we please go?" Hannah pleaded with her puppy eyes.

"We will be good. Promise!" Nick smiled.

"Yeah. It's fine with me as long as it's okay with Jess." She said his name with hatred, and he hated it. She didn't even look at him when she said it.

"Umm, sure. Whatever." Jess nodded.

"Then let's go!" Sookie smiled.

"Yay!" The kids echoed.

They left hand in hand, leaving Rory and Jess in the living room.

"We're leaving soon." Rory bit her lip.

"Where?"

"Back to our apartment."

"Right. Should have seen that one coming." Jess shook his head bitterly. "So, what? We forget everything when you go back to wherever you live? All our problems just go away? What about Hannah–,"

"Oh, you mean your daughter?" Rory crossed her arms against her chest.

"Look, I'm sorry I said that last night..."

"Nope, I don't think sorry is going to cover it this time, Jess. Sorry isn't going to take away last night. Oh yeah, I have been meaning to ask you, are you going out with Lea anytime soon? Because I would really like some notice next time."

"Rory, don't do this."

"You did this, Jess." Rory sighed. "I don't want to have to deal with you...and here. I always will. Because this is where all those memories are. And we aren't anything, not anymore."

"Rory, you have to know that I love you."

"Well, let me just tell you something, Jess. People don't hurt the people they love. And now, Jess, I truly hate you." Rory exclaimed, leaving him in the living room, as she ran into her room.

A/N: Hope you liked it. Sorry for the mistakes in the spelling and crap, I didn't have time to run it by my BETA. So, don't lecture me...I know, I suck at anything that has to do with spelling. lol. Anyways, I love this chapter, and I loved writing it because it has so many raw emotions and you know what everyone is feeling at all times. I like that about it. Okay, well, reviews make the world go 'round!