Finally…The Brat Pack gets some more attention.

At the Smash Mansion, The Brat Pack was eating junk food and watching television. Because everyone was occupied with something, the three were home alone. After they discarded the dead, stinky squirrel, they waited for the others' quest to end. Waiting had never been so much fun.

Except now. For 2 reasons.

The Power Trip had just walked in, and there was nothing really on TV.

"What are you wimps doing here?" Bowser asked, putting down all of his awesome electronics.

"We were watching TV, but now there's nothing on," Young Link said, flipping through channels.

"Yeah, whatever," Ganondorf said, iced out. The Brat Pack stared at the excessive amount of jewelry he was wearing.

"Damn, you're iced out," said Young Link.

Ganondorf nodded and smiled, revealing shiny, golden teeth with the words "Evil4Lyfe" engraved on them.

"You didn't get those from the mall," DK noticed, holding a computer and large bags full of bananas.

"That's right," Ganondorf said.

"You stole them from somebody," said Ness.

"That's right…" Ganondorf walked away. The rest shrugged and went about their business.

"Pi pichu chu pi? (Wonder where Jigglypuff went?)"

"Oh my Go- shut up!" Young Link snapped, passionately wanting to chop Pichu's head off. Then something happened that caught everyone's attention.

"It's PIE!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing, and then scrambled to the television to hear and see more. DK and Bowser rushed to the TV as well (Bowser "accidentally" tackled Pichu through the window). Yes, the announcer was in fact talking about Pastry Inexplicably Enhanced. The PIE rested on a rotating platform as if it were a car, and it was noticeably big & full.

"The grand prize winner of today's show will receive PIE- Pastry Inexplicably Enhanced! This magically pumped-up pastry is twice as big, thrice as full, and fource...? That's a word? Well…fource as sweet as a normal pie! Only 1 exists in the entire universe, and it could be yours if you win…Monkeyshine!"

As the applause began, the Smashers' jaws dropped like Fox when metallic. Pichu climbed back through the window, dazed.

"Anyone know where that studio is?" asked DK.

"It's Smash City week, so…"

Ness stopped. Everyone bolted out the door. Except Ganondorf, who was upstairs admiring his bling.

Meanwhile…

When Jigglypuff awakened, she was staring directly at a dim, overhead light. She moaned, sat up, stretched, and was about to get up to leave when…

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

A rifle cocked. Jigglypuff turned around in her seat. A guy resembling the guy that checked her guarded the only door. But the first dude was in a pool of his own blood in the corner. Was this his twin?

"Why's that guy dead in the corner?"

"He forgot my latte."

Jigglypuff whimpered.

"Don't worry." The man was wearing a white tuxedo and sitting on a large, red executive chair. His voice was deep and he was fairly light-skinned. "I won't kill you. You know too much."

This was the first time Jigglypuff had ever heard anything resembling a compliment for her intelligence. Ever.

"Really? Me? Honestly? Truly? Too much? Know? Me? For real? Swear?" She blushed a little.

"…Yes…Listen. We must know…how did you hear of the portable record player?"

"Ooh! This is one of those interrogation thingies! Uh…I dunno. I just started looking for it when the record player broke."

The man banged the desk with his fists.

"Don't give me that shit!"

"It's true! Why is this such an issue? What's with the portable record player?"

The man sighed. The door guard imitated a guitar solo to a song he was listening to: Twisted Sister's We're Not Gonna Take It.

"It started 3 years ago. The record age had long passed, and CDs were as common as air. Somebody couldn't accept the cold fact that records were obsolete. Her name was Julia Jewel."

Jigglypuff gasped dramatically.

"She made a machine 3 times as large as the standard portable CD player, simply called the portable record player. No one thought it would be any success at all. Julia ended up selling 93 million units in 24 hours. People bought it by accident, it was so successful. Within a week, she became a multi-billionaire. The FBI found something incredibly wrong with this. They confronted Julia and stated that the device would become government property and funds would be equally shared. Period."

Jigglypuff began eating popcorn.

"They lied," the man whispered. "When- where'd you get that?"

Jigglypuff shrugged as the door guard snagged some.

"Okay, where was I...? Oh, yeah. When Julia began getting less and less money, she personally threatened to sue. A letter would've been better. Heh. Rhyme…Yeah, she got shot in the eyes. She died, too."

Jigglypuff began drinking a Pepsi. (I don't own Pepsi. If I did, soda would suck.)

"The FBI took it off store shelves a year ago."

Jigglypuff turned around and spat her Pepsi at the door guard. "WHAT? They stopped selling it?"

The man nodded. "They plan to insert some type of nuclear weapon/mind-control device, then re-release it…and, as popular as it was, it was easily breakable. Do you know what that means?"

Jigglypuff shook her head.

"Everyone will buy it all over again. And when that happens…we'll all be in trouble. That's why I needed to know what you did."

"Well, now I know everything."

The three were silent.

"Damn, I need to stop doing that…"

"Can I go now?"

The man snapped his fingers and the door guard moved to the side.

"Two more questions though. 1, why doesn't anyone else know about this?"

"They never ask me who I am…If this gets out, the government will kill whoever spread the word."

"'Kay. And 2, why would the FBI do something like this?"

"We're really not sure, but we assume it is for testing purposes. Just an assumption."

"Well, I want one! And I'll be popped if I'm gonna let the 'government' put a weapon/device in something so cool! I'm better than the government! Screw them!"

"Don't be ridiculous!"

"I can't help it!"

Jigglypuff grabbed her refreshments and stormed out. 10 seconds later, she stormed back in.

"I need cab fare!"

"Knock yourself out!" The man threw a $20 bill at Jigglypuff, who caught it.

"Thank you!"

"No problem!"

"Bye!" Jigglypuff stormed off once more. "Sucker. I still have Falcon's money…"

Meanwhile…

Ding! The elevator door opened. The Italians, The Spacemen, The Three Brave Swordsmen, Girl Power, and Old School stepped out, all looking heroic, ready to take on anything thrown at them. Then the Ice Climbers busted out laughing, and the rest groaned.

"Sorry. I couldn't hold it," laughed Popo.

The teams heard Eggman's sinister laugh. They looked straight ahead at a desk. Behind it, a wall-sized drape opened to reveal a wall-sized window. A tall, black chair turned around to reveal the source of the laughter. Peach gasped. For no reason.

"Smashers! Welcome to one of my many headquarters."

"Shut up! I'm sick of hearing your voice!" Fox yelled.

"It's ass-kicking time," Falcon said. Each team slowly walked towards Eggman. Who chuckled.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you!"

Eggman snapped his long fingers. The floor directly in front of them became heavily electrified. All teams took several steps back, and Eggman laughed again.

"PIE will be mine. I've just traced the transmission of Monkeyshine, and I'm on my way to crash the game." He jumped into that round floating machine he flies around in, flew out the window, and turned around. "Just try and stop me!" He began flying away.

The teams looked at him like he was a retard. Samus shot Eggman down with a missile like it was nothing. Which it was.

"Damn, I hate Monkeyshine…" said Marth.

"Well…" After Nana spoke, everyone rushed into the elevator. Link quickly pressed "1".

"The Brat Pack is bound to be there," said Luigi.

"And if we're unlucky, so will Mewtwo and The Power Trip," said Mario.

"Does it matter?" asked Zelda.

The large group thought for a little while.

"No. It really doesn't," said Samus.

Well. Now they know where it is. Who will get it first? And where exactly is Mewtwo? What could he be doing...?