Almost a month. Almost. Go me.
The Italians, The Spacemen, Girl Power, The Three Brave Swordsmen, and Old School split up again. The Spacemen and Girl Power took their spacecraft; while the remaining grounded teams drove in their stolen cars. Their destination was the same. The taping of Monkeyshine. Where PIE awaited one of the teams.
"We are not catching up to them," Roy said as they sped through the streets, miraculously missing every vehicle. Well, they hit a kid on a scooter, a woman on roller skates, and a little girl on a tricycle, but those aren't really vehicles. And the team didn't really see them.
"Well, of course. We have cars, they have jet-powered spacecraft…Cheaters," Marth, the driver, quipped.
"We should focus on getting there before The Italians and Old School," suggested Link.
He turned around and saw Old School's car crash into a grocery store.
"We should focus on getting there before The Italians do," suggested Link.
Meanwhile, at the grocery wreckage…
"Mr. Game & Watch, I thought you said you could drive!" Popo whined. Each team member was still in the car because of his or her seat belt. Mr. Game & Watch tried to explain that he never said any such thing. Then he realized that they thought that because he "spoke", sighed, and banged his two-dimensional noggin on the steering wheel.
"You're a liar!" screamed Nana.
Meanwhile, in The Italians' car…
"Damn! Why did we get stuck with the SUV?" Mario, the driver, complained, as The Three Brave Swordsmen sped away in their luxury car.
"Because you picked it," Luigi said, scowling.
"Oh, right," said Mario.
Meanwhile, in Samus' starship…
"Stop shooting at us!" Peach yelled as Samus dodged the Arwings' laser blasts.
"No! That PIE is ours!" Fox yelled through the communicator.
"You shooting us is only slowing both of us down. Okay? Now quit it," said Samus.
"But I like pressing the button!" said Falcon.
"She's got a point. Everybody cease fire," Fox commanded.
The team stopped shooting.
"Now, Falcon, do you know how to-"
Falcon's Arwing boosted ahead.
"…Never mind." The team proceeded to boost towards their destination. They only flew ahead of Samus by about 40 feet.
"I knew I should've got some boosters from that Slim Cognito guy," Samus lamented.
"Who?" asked Zelda.
Meanwhile…
Jigglypuff had just made it outside after the incredibly slow elevator ride. She stretched and took a breath, like she hadn't been outside in several days. She was about to signal for a taxi the best way she could when Samus' starship and three Arwings rushed by overhead. About 9 seconds after that, she saw a luxury car and an SUV speed by. Jigglypuff got the hint and jumped onto the mirror of a passing, speeding bus.
Meanwhile, at the grocery wreckage…
"So now what do we do?" wondered Nana.
Mr. Game & Watch pulled out a cell phone, flat and monochrome like him. He dialed some numbers and started beeping into the phone as if he was having a conversation. He hung the phone up 10 seconds into the call.
"…What'd you do?" asked Popo.
Mr. Game & Watch waved at the Ice Climbers, ran into the street, and grabbed a passing, speeding, flat, monochrome fire truck by the ladder. He sped away.
"Oh, that's not right!" whined Nana.
"Beep beep buzz beep! (Sorry for the short notice!)" Mr. Game & Watch yelled to his fellow driver.
"Beep buzz! Beep buzz buzz! (No problem! Just hang on!)" the driver yelled back. The fire truck was faster than both the SUV (duh) and the luxury car, and it drove exactly in the middle of the street, so no one could hit him.
"Oh, that's not right!" whined Mario and Marth.
Meanwhile, at the studio's front doors…
The Brat Pack, Bowser, and DK just made it in a taxi. Ness paid the driver, and the taxi quickly drove away.
"Anyone know why we let them come with us?" asked Young Link in confusion.
"Bowser threatened to do…something…I forgot," said Ness.
"Yeah, me too," said Bowser.
A laser exploded several inches away from them. The ships were coming. The five ran inside the studio. The Spacemen ejected from their ships when they were above the building.
Meanwhile, at the Monkeyshine taping…
The Cute Ones (thought they were out for good, huh?), the three Monkeyshine contestants, were about to begin their second challenge, the Monkey Re-Caging, when everybody heard a faint yell from above.
"Falcon…"
There was a brand-new hole in the ceiling after that.
"PUNCH!"
Yeah, he punched through the ceiling. Several pieces of metal landed on several audience members, (probably) killing them. Fox and Falco landed on their feet, while Falcon landed on his stomach.
"All right! Where's the PIE?" Fox yelled. Many audience members screamed and began running away. Then Samus' starship crashed right through the wall of the studio, and the audience screamed louder and ran away faster. The ship skidded to a stop.
"Dammit Peach! What the hell is wrong with you?" yelled Samus.
"Not now! PIE awaits!" Zelda said. Each member of Girl Power individually came out the ship.
"Hey, what the (beep) are you people doing?" the host yelled.
"The Cute Ones? I thought you guys were in the hospital," said Samus.
"Of course we were," said Yoshi.
There was silence for a while, save for the monkeys' screeching and leaving the studio with the host.
"…Anyway…Falcon, go!" Falco said quickly. Falcon, being the fastest runner there, ran over to PIE and picked it up. It was heavier than it looked. Then Kirby sucked it up and held it in his mouth. He tried to run away, but tripped and spit the pastry out. Samus grabbed it with her grappling beam and was about to get into her ship, when a monochrome fire truck slipped through a space between the ship and the wall. Mr. Game & Watch jumped off the truck, thanked the driver, and stared at everybody else.
After that, The Three Brave Swordsmen and The Italians crashed through the previous hole the ship created.
"Doesn't anyone use the door?" said Peach with a groan.
The Brat Pack, DK, and a monkey covered Bowser ran through the door.
"Somebody get these things off!" roared Bowser.
"Why?" said Dr. Mario, getting out of the car.
Just then, a bus crashed through the ceiling and landed on its front.
"Okay, that just makes no sense at all," said Pikachu.
Jigglypuff climbed out the door, ignoring the groaning riders. "Crap, I'm late."
"Couldn't you tell from the first hole?" said Fox.
PIE lay in the middle of a circle the Smashers created (Bowser was still getting the monkeys off of him). Samus should've just thrown that thing in the ship, but The Three Brave Swordsmen ruined that chance with their crash. Now, no one dared make a move. It all came down to this. Jigglypuff even forgot about the portable record player. PIE was what it was all about.
Suddenly, everyone charged toward it all at once. Right when they were about to grasp it, all at once…
It disappeared. They all crashed into each other.
"Ow…What the hell?" Fox looked up. PIE was rising through the hole in the ceiling…and right into Mewtwo's grasp.
"Should've seen this coming," said Link.
"Dammit!" everyone yelled at the same time. "Stupid monkeys!" added Bowser.
Several minutes later…
Mewtwo chuckled in his superb mind (causing him to chuckle out loud) as he flew back to the mansion to claim his prize. Had Master Hand had a brain, he'd know what he'd be receiving, but instead, he had to retrieve the pastry first to find out.
"Fools," he said to himself.
He could see Ganondorf rushing towards him, with some type of staff. It didn't take him long to realize that this wasn't Ganondorf at all. It was Phantom Ganon. The phantom attempted to stab Mewtwo with the staff, but was repelled by a blue barrier. Phantom Ganon flew back and separated into 20 other phantoms, circling the psychic feline. Each phantom raised their staff. Each staff emanated yellow.
Mewtwo flew upwards. The phantoms fired sparkling, yellow, electric balls of energy towards him. They joined together, creating a huge, sparkling, yellow, electric ball of doom. Mewtwo caught it with his mind, with some effort, and launched it back at the phantoms. They chuckled before they evaporated from the hit. Then Mewtwo noticed that he had lost grip of PIE.
Meanwhile, at the grocery wreckage…
"Why are we still here?" asked Nana, ignoring the store owner's angry screaming.
PIE crashed through the roof and landed on Popo's head.
"OW! Son of a- hey!"
"PIE!" they said in unison. Popo, ignoring his slight concussion, miraculously ignited the sports car, backed up, and sped towards the mansion.
Meanwhile, in the sky…
Mewtwo teleported somewhere.
Meanwhile, at the studio…no, wait, the studio's empty now. Back on the road!
All the teams decided to flip over the bus and drive it back to the mansion. It was a bit slow, but at least all the cars on the "wrong" side of the street knew to get the hell out of the way.
"Seriously, we should've known Mewtwo was gonna do that," said Luigi.
The next chapter will be…the end. Which team will get the prize? Will anyone survive through this whole story? And whatever became of those monkeys? Is the portable record player forever forgotten? Does it really matter? We'll see on the last chapter.