The journey was long and laborious. Neither spoke much, whenever Shadow did talk, it was in a frightened whisper that was barely there, strange when his usual voice was deep and confident.
Smith didn't like the silence, he didn't like it one bit, it gave him too much time to think about things.
This much time to focus on one's self can't be good for the psyche. He thought randomly.
His head ached from all his analyzing; he was trying to figure out how he had let this all spill so rapidly out of control. He should've just kept his mouth shut; he should've followed his orders. Then maybe he'd be hunting Shadow, instead of sitting shotgun next to him.
He rubbed his temple slowly with the tips of his fingers, now he had given up thinking about the past and the choices he thought were justified then, but looked very foolish now, because his thoughts always returned to him, Mr.Anderson, and that blood stain that still tinged the filthy hotel wall.
That only depressed him further, even though he didn't think he could feel any more depressed.
His whole body ached, and he felt a very strong urge to crawl into a ball and just sleep, and sleep for days on end.
"What do you think will become of me?." Smith asked finally, looking sideways at Shadow, who seemed to be lost in thought.
Shadow jumped a little at the sound of his voice, and then looked at him shakily.
He sighed deeply before talking, his eyes were watery and far away.
"I dunno to be honest. Locke... he is very persuasive. And the Council may have been with his choice to begin with."
"Commander Locke... I take it he wanted no business with me." Smith asked, his stomach knotting and churning.
"Yeah, pretty much. I almost got myself thrown in the Stockade trying to get him to even consider it. But... I dunno, if he does want to kill you, he'll ask you a thousand and one questions first."
"What kind of questions?." Smith asked, even though he knew damn well what type of questions Locke would ask, but he wanted to see if Shadow would be honest with him and just say it, just to say that name.
Shadow looked at him carefully, as if he was considering what to say. To tell the truth or to lie?, now that is the question.
"Well... probably try to get some info about the Mainframe out of you, probably ask you about Neo as well." His lips tightened, he looked as if saying that name in front of Smith burned him.
"Ah, yes. Of course. I'll expect him to talk about M..." Don't call him Mr.Anderson! He thought, frightened. "To... talk about Neo." He finished.
Shadow grinned slightly.
"Call him Mr.Anderson if you want, Smithie. Don't bother me, I know how you feel about the guy, I don't expect you to act like you don't loathe him with every fibre of your being."
That's a little extreme Is what he wanted to say. But was it?. Was it really?. Smith doubted it, he thought that Shadow was more bang on describing how he felt about Mr.Anderson more accurately than he ever was. So instead Smith said nothing, and left Shadow to think.
He began to look out the window, watching the simulated buildings and parks fly by in a flurry of color and noise.
And to his surprise, he fell into a light doze.
When he awoke, his head felt light and swimmy, and parts of his body ached from sleeping in an awkward position, but he otherwise felt refreshed. Shadow was still driving, and he looked very ill rested and stressed.
"Maybe I should drive for a while." Smith said cautiously.
Shadow grinned. "Sure, just like the old married couple, right?. 'Oh honey, you look tired, let me drive.'" A pause. "Thanks, man, but we're like ten minutes away, you slept like a dog."
Smith smiled. It felt alien on his face.
"Right-O. Here we are, Pally." Shadow's grin had disappeared, he looked frightened.
Smith didn't like that look at all, it made him frightened. Fear of Viruses was not something he wished to experience, yet here he was, fretting over Commander Locke and the Zion Council.
The car smoothed to a silent halt, and Shadow killed the engine. He looked grave and thoughtful in the light dark and frosty moonlight coming in through the window.
He climbed out without even glancing at Smith, and shut the door. Smith climbed out and looked around. They were in the edges of the main city, but the rest of the Matrix stretched for miles. Smith looked around with nervous curiosity. He saw the houses dwindling into the distance, the trees and large stretches of greenland, eventually moving up towards icy blue mountains with a half ghost moon floating in the middle.
In other situations, this scene would've been quite beautiful.
He looked at Shadow, who looked more afraid than he felt, and moved softly beside him.
Shadow stopped suddenly. Smith looked at him with questioning eyes.
"You gotta go by yourself, man. I don't wanna do it, but I ain't got a choice. They're just around that corner. I hope you do well." Shadow smiled, but it was weak and painful to look at.
Smith walked around the corner.
Locke and a few people he didn't recognize were standing there.
"Well, here he is, Agent Virus himself." One of them said, grinning viciously.