Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot and any new characters that I may introduce.
Nobody ever said it would be easy.
Chapter eight: Explosions
Sirius followed her all the way up to the common room, calling her name as he went. She just ignored him. She wanted to get as far away from him as possible. She slammed the portrait closed behind her shutting him out. He quickly said the password and grabbed her as she went up to her dorm.
'Get the hell off me.'
He let go of her wrist and she stepped away from him. They stared at each other, both equally angry with each other. Lily, James, Remus and Nicole knew that there was going to be trouble so put silencing charms and repelling charms on the doorways, holes and walls. They stepped well away from the pair and waited. A few younger students tried to come through the portrait hole and down the staircases but they were told to come back later unless the wanted to be caught in the cross fire.
Sirius was the first to brake the silence.
'Look Amaya-'
'You know, I came in to dinner to apologies for last night. I should have seen it from your point of view, I was willing to take the blame for your pigheadedness.'
'My pigheadedness?'
'Yes yours, but instead I came into your pathetic attempts to make me jealous-'
'It worked didn't it?'
Sirius crossed his arms across his chest and smirked at her. Hermione looked a little taken back. Then she raised her eyebrow at him and she smugly crossed her arms.
'You tell me. Were you jealous of Malfoy?'
'Yeah about that...'
He was furious. He stepped within a foot of her and looked down at her. He wasn't a violent man. He never ever hit a girl but that didn't stop James and Remus stepping forward.
'What the hell were you thinking?'
He didn't shout at her nor hit her. He was hurt and she knew it. He looked down at her with disappointment and hurt in his voice. Hermione wouldn't look up at him. She knew if she did she would cry.
'I'm sorry but you don't rule me, I can do what I want..'
He stepped away from her with a smile on his face. He chuckled slightly, which confused all of them.
'O yeah I forgot it was you. You like to lead guys on and then once they start to fall, run like the wind, without a second glance.'
'I didn't lead you on!'
'Yes you did.'
'O please enlighten me Sirius!'
'Ok what about the train? You kept looking at me and smiling and flirting!'
'That's exactly it! I was being friendly, I needed to make friends and I was being polite. I had just gone back 20 years in god dam time! For god sake I was so vulnerable after what happened to me and you were so nice and kind, I was just responding to that. And you'll find that it was you who was putting your arm around me, calling me beautiful.'
Sirius turned red with embarrassment. He couldn't deny that fact, but she was still flirting with him
'She's got you there Padfoot.'
'Shut up Moony! Ok what about when you said to Lily that you thought you were starting to fall for me? And that you thought I was hot.'
It was now Hermione's turn to embarrassed. She looked down at the floor and let her hair cover her tinged cheeks. She answered him in the smallest voice she could possibly muster.
'You weren't supposed to hear that. That was said between Lily and me. You invaded my privacy.'
'Yeah and I apologised for that! But it still don't change the fact that you said it.'
She didn't know what to say. She couldn't deny it but she didn't want to look stupid either. She wasn't going to admit it again. She lifted her head and met his piecing gaze. His eyes bore into her as if he was trying to predict her next move. Her eyes were shinning but she was forcing her self not to cry. Sirius was beyond tears, he was too angry to cry. All he wanted to do was shout at her. But it pained him to see her like that, to see her so upset over something he had caused.
'Things change Sirius.'
'In the matter of a few days?'
She was getting really pissed off the way he kept shouting at her, when all she was doing was talking to him.
'For Christ's sake Sirius! You are not the sex god with smooth ways that you make out to be! So what, I thought you were hot! It doesn't mean anything. It CAN'T mean anything.'
'When did I say I was? You fall out of thin air, claiming you are from the future. Flirting with me - I saved you from Malfoy and Snape in that corridor for god sake. Do you realise what they might have done if we didn't show?'
Again she looked at the floor ashamed. She was so grateful that he and James did save her because she knew what would have happened. She felt so humiliated in front of them now, they were so great to her and she was throwing it back in his face by acting like a bitch.
'Yes I know. I'm so sorry, you've been nothing but great to me over the last few weeks with Malfoy and everything. You and the rest made me feel like part of your group and I'm really grateful. I just really miss my friend's back home. You have no idea how much.'
She let some tears fall from her eyes and the mention of her friends. She missed them so much. She felt so bad now in the middle of an argument with him. He was actually feeling bad at making her cry, but he was so angry still. He was not seeing the girl he liked in front of him now, he was seeing a girl who infuriated him and frustrated him so much.
'And I'm sorry if I lead you on or upset you in any way. That wasn't what I meant to do.'
'Then what did you mean to do? Huh? Just flirt with me, dance with me and then turn around and drop me? But then- and this is the good part- you insult me and my girlfriend because you were jealous.'
The four onlookers were shocked. How could Sirius still shout at her now? She was standing in front of him in tears and he was being an arse to her.
Hermione was angry that he was still shouting at her.
'No! I came down to dinner to apologise for my actions last night, I thought-'
She stopped in her tracks mid sentence. She wasn't going to carry on. Sirius was still staring at her.
'You thought what?'
Silence. Hermione let more and more tears fall down her red cheeks. She was playing with her hands.
'Come on Maya. Tell us what you thought.'
'I THOUGHT THAT MAYBE WE COULD HAVE WORKED SOMETHING OUT OK? HAPPY NOW? I'VE ADMITTED IT! YES I DO LIKE YOU. A HELL OF A LOT INFACT. BUT IT'S OBVIOUS YOU COULDN'T HAVE FELT THE SAME WAY IF YOU WERE WITH MICHELLE.'
The common room was dead silent. Nobody moved or said a word. She looked him dead in the eye, but he couldn't meet her gaze. It was now his turn to look at the floor. He felt so bad now, she had spilled everything out to him and he still shouted at her, and now he didn't know what to do. She had just told him that she had liked him and all he could do now was stare at the floor. Say something, please say something Sirius. I just gave you my heart and all you can do is stare at the floor. Please don't leave it like this. Hermione's mind was racing, all she wanted him to do now was tell her that they should talk alone. But no, he just stood there like an idiot.
'I hope you are satisfied now? You've humiliated me in front of your friends. And not to worry I'll keep out of your way so you don't have to look at my dirty whore, know-it-all nobody face.'
She turned on her heal and went up to her dormitory, slamming it closed behind her. The five on them stood there in the common room, not really knowing what to say. Sirius just stared at the empty space in front of him where Hermione once stood. Why didn't he say anything? He watched her flea from him, tears streaming down her face, hurt because of what he did or didn't do to her.
Seeing her cry made him feel terrible, he wanted to jump and hug her making all her tears disappear, but no, he stood in front of her watching her cry. Why did he have to be such a bastard? Seeing the person her felt so strong for cry felt like a tight case closed around his heart and tears began to form in his eyes. He wouldn't let the others see him cry. He fled from the common room to find the answers in drink. James and Remus followed him while Lily and Nicole went to find Hermione.
Let the night begin.
dark raven
-x-