THE NEW STUDENTS 3
OPEN SEASON.
Hillary woke up very early that Sunday. Usually, she liked to oversleep on weekends, but since she was now a member of two sportive teams, decided to make some extra exercise that morning. The hyena put on her usual outfit, but added a blue sweatshirt over her regular top, and a red headband. After saying good morning to her parents (who just nodded, since they were both still sleepy), Hillary left and jogged towards the Acme Park, located just a few blocks away from the house. Hillary's place was a regular medium-class apartment, not very fancy but comfortable enough for her family, plus having a couple of good diners in that same street; Hillary's family rarely eat there, but they like to pick up the leftovers from the diners' dumpsters (they were more of the scavenging type than Hillary liked to admit).
Hillary found a few other toons doing their early exercise as well, mostly canine and bird's type. She wasn't expecting to see any of her classmates, especially since she discovered many of them were of the religious type, and had to attend their services on Sunday. Hillary herself was a believer, but wasn't used to go Church every week, thinking that it would be kind of hypocrite of her part since she usually solved her problems on a violent way. However, there were toons waiting for her at the park, but they weren't her friends, and had very special intentions involving her.
"Gee, Bull, look! That's one of the toons we are supposed to hunt, right?" A thin alligator wearing a red bandana around his neck and an explorer's hat directed to a shorter one, wearing black hat and gloves, and a red bandana as well. They were both hidden behind some bushes, and looking at the hyena jogging in front of them.
"That's right, Axel. A toon hyena, or, as we experts call her, a "Furrious Piranhus". The children at Guatemala Zoo will really enjoy watching her on a cage that mimics perfectly her natural habitat." Bull pointed, with a proud look at his face. Axel rubbed his head.
"I still don't get why we are hunting here at the city, boss. We have enough troubles hunting back at home." Axel said. Bull sighed, and placed a hand on his sidekick's shoulder.
"Well, you see, Axel, since our current income these days comes mainly from doing cameos in fanfiction, and we are rarely used, our bank account had become an endangered species. That's why I accepted the Perfectos' offer of paying us some extra cash for every Looniversity's student we can catch and send to a zoo, and the main reason we camped here last night, waiting for any of them to come at the park to exercise as part of their training program." Bull explained. Then, he and Axel took a big steel's net out from a backpack Bull had behind him; it was designed to hold a Tasmanian devil, so it would work fine against a hyena.
"Excuse me, guys, but I couldn't help but overhear your conversation. Are you sure you wouldn't like me as your prey better?" The alligators heard a seductive female voice behind them, and turned back. Their jaws hit the ground; in front of them, Minerva Mink was winking an eye to the reptilles, while wearing a pink aerobics outfit, complete with purple tights covering her legs, a black headband, and red legwarmers. The net fell from the hunters' hands, and they both removed their hats to talk to the mink.
"What a gorgeous creature you are, Miss. A "Hottious Minkus", if I'm correct, as I usually are. Certainly, you would be a really desirable capture." Bull said, trying to keep his cool.
"And one we wouldn't like to send to Guatemala, right, boss?" Axel elbowed Bull slightly. Bull nodded.
"In deed, Axel, but don't exaggerate the details. We want this fic to keep a certain rating." Bull told him, without losing sight of the girl. Minerva giggled, and winked her eyes again; however, this time, she wasn't directing to the alligators, but to someone behind them. A second later, the alligators got captured by their own net, and, before they realized, were hanging from a tree, a couple of feet over the ground.
"See, guys, this is what you can do when you have the proper bait." Minerva said, standing in front of the hunters. Next to her, Hillary was glaring at the alligators, and, at the other side of the mink, Ronald was doing the same; he, like Hillary, was wearing a sweatshirt, but his was blue and white.
"Gee, Bull, I guess we got captured in our own trap." Axel said in a muffled voice.
"As usual, your ability to understand an obvious yet ironic situation amazes me, Axel." Bull replied. He then directed to his captors, with a nervous smile.
"You guys aren't going to punish us in a way that involves lots of physical damage, right?" Bull asked. Minerva shook her head, and moved a few steps back.
"Well, I'm more a lover than a fighter, but I guess my friends here have a different opinion." Minerva said, smiling to her friends. Ronald and Hillary nodded to each other, and shook paws before approaching the alligators, cracking their knuckles. Minerva sat on the lawn to enjoy the scene.
POW! ZOCK! THUD! ZAS! WHAM! CUAS! PUNCH! CHIN! PUM! PAS! TORTILLAS! PAPAS! ZOWIE! PUNCH! CRUNCH! INSERT HITTING SOUND HERE!...
After a couple of minutes, Hillary and Ron stopped using their new alligator-skinned punching pag, and dusted their paws while sitting next to Minerva. The alligators were badly injured, with lots of stars and birdies flying around their heads. Minerva giggled, and took a lot of pictures of herself out from her body's pocket; the mink cleared her throat, and spoke out loudly.
"Attention, everyone. Get a free autographed photo of yours truly by hitting a couple of alligators with a plank!" Minerva almost screamed at the last part. One second later, a dozen guys, exercising at the park that morning, dashed at the place, surrounding the net, each one holding a plank; two of them were actually holding baseball bats. The birds flying around the hunters' heads panicked, and flew away.
"Bull... I have the feeling we are going to be human pinatas for a while." Axel said, gulping.
"Don't be silly, Axel... we aren't humans. However, the basic concept is still the same." Bull replied, gulping as well. The early joggers started hitting them while Minerva and her young friends watched in amusement.
"You said youare more a lover than a fighter? That sounds weird from the girl that used to wrestle me in her backyard's lawn." Ronald said to Minerva, causing the mink to shrug and the hyena to trifle.
"Well, Ronnie, that was a long time ago. I retired undefeated, by the way." Minerva told Hillary, and then rubbed her chin.
"Of course, maybe the fact that the last time I was 12 and one half years old, and you only 6, could have helped me a little." Minerva admitted while turning back to see Ron. Hillary chuckled while Ronald rolled his eyes.
"Hey, Ron, I can wrestle you in the lawn anytime you want. I have to show you new movements for your routine with Mary anyway." Hillary told Ron. The guy blushed slightly, and smiled to the hyena. Minerva chuckled, and returned to watch the show.
Meanwhile, at Acme Loo, Wally was leaving the place. His father was a Jewish, but his mom was Catholic, and, when he was old enough, Wally decided on his mother's faith (another reason Walter was so furious with him), so he went Church almost every Sunday. Once he was a few feet away from the entrance's stoop, the wolf received a message at his cell phone. He checked it, and frowned slightly. A second later, he heard a sheep crying; the sound came from the forest area next to the school.
"Baaah...Baaah..." A little white lamb really was crying, while pretending to have an injured leg. He paused for a moment, and directed his attention to the nearby bushes.
"Can I stop now, Coronel? Please, this is very dangerous. I don't want to be his breakfast!" The lamb almost begged. A short man, big nosed and chined, with a red moustache, wearing an English explorer's outfit and holding a rifle, popped out from the bushes, with an angry expression.
"Just keep crying or I'll make chops of you. Once we get this wolf for the Perfectos, we'll go and get that lion they mentioned. That prey is more of my style." Coronel Rimfire said to the lamb while returning to his observation point. The lamb gulped, and returned to his acting. The hunter raised his head slightly to watch over the plants.
"Come on, wild dog. Come and bite something tasty." The human said, with an evil look on his eyes. Then, in a perfect cue...
CRUNCH!
"YEEEAAAUCH!" The hunter yelled in pain, and jumped several feet in the air. Then, Wally smiling face popped out from the bushes, with a piece of Coronel Rimfire's short pants on his jaws. He directed his attention to the cowering lamb, and spitted the clothing.
"Don't worry, I'll not hurt you. I just hunt at the market. Just leave, okay?" Wally said to the lamb. The scared creature sighed in relief, and escaped in a hurry.
At that moment, the hunter hit the ground, butt first. The furious hunter took a look at the bite on his pants, and then stood up, aiming at the wolf. Wally responded stucking his finger on the gun's cannon. Rimfire smiled.
"That trick is really old, kid. This gun is designed to not explode if you do it, so that will not save you." Rimfire said, and pulled the trigger. Wally cheeks got bigger, and he directed his jaws in front of the hunter's nose.
BAAAAANG!
Wally shot with his jaws at Rimfire's head. The human's face was blackened by the blast, and, a second later, fell to the ground, knocked out. Wally then took his finger out of the gun, and shook his paw in pain; this trick was useful, but always caused some minimal damage to the finger.
Wally took a can of white cheddar spray cheese out from his body's pocket, and sprayed it on his snout. A moment later, the hunter woke up.
"Why you, stupid mutt..." Rimfire started, but was cut when Wally snarled at him; more than the snarling, it was the cheese in Wally's jaws what scared the man.
"AAAAH! He has the rabies! And he bite me! HELP! MEDIC!" The human yelled, and dashed away in fear. Wally chuckled, and licked the cheese to clean up his snout. At that moment, he received another message on his cell phone.
"Be careful. There are hunters hired by the Perfectos to catch us. Tell your contacts." Wally read, and chuckled.
"A little late, Ronald, but thank you." The wolf said while walking away from the school. His girlfriend already had alerted him with the previous message, and now he was following Ronald's advice while walking.
A while later, at the park, the other three toons were at the juice stand, drinking the OJ Minerva bought for them. Hillary was actually surprised to see them at the park at that time, because she thought Ronald would like to oversleep on the weekends. Again, he was challenging all the hyena's previous conceptions.
"Well, Hillary, I have a daily routine to keep me in shape. It's particularly important to me, since I have a modeling career." Minerva explained. "I take an early jogging, do a few aerobics, and finally, when I return home, have a fast cold shower. I also go to the public pool twice a week to swim a little. And, since Ronald is now living with me, he gives me company during my working out."
"Well, I had seen how the guys react in front of you. I know you like the attention, but I wouldn't like to know anyone tried to go too far with the flirting. At least, when I come with you, the other males keep their distance." Ronald explained. Minerva scratched his head, smiling.
"You are a real over-protective little brother, don't you?" Minerva joked. Ronald couldn't help but purr a little and wag his tail slightly. Hillary smiled as well at the view; these two had a very nice sibling-like relationship. Minerva ended her drink, and stood up.
"Well, I'll better go now. Stay with Hillary for a while, Ronnie, just in case there are more poachers; I guess the two of you can handle any of them. I'll wait for you at home, and remember, don't be late." Minerva said to Ronald while patting his head. Then, she shook paws with Hillary, and jogged away from there.
"Don't be late? Are you guys going somewhere, Clarence?" Hillary asked. Ronald took a sip, and replied.
"Yes, Church. We'll go to the one o' clock service." Ronald informed. Hillary raised an eyebrow, and then looked at the direction Minerva left. Ron chuckled.
"I know what you are thinking. Yes, Minerva can be vain, and have a few other defects… like pressing the toothpaste's tube by the middle, but she is very nice. She only takes advantage of her looks because that way she gets out of problems, like when a hunter is chasing her, but she is more than a pretty face. She sings, dances, go to Church, plays tennis, makes a delicious apple pie, and a lot of other things. When she rejects a guy on screen, she is just acting her role, and, behind cameras, can have a nice conversation with the same male she dumped in front of them." Ronald concluded. Hillary pondered about the speech for a moment, and smirked.
"Oh… you mean, like us? We can kick each other's butt on classes, but I actually had started liking spending time with you." Hillary explained. Ronald blushed again.
"Yes… is more or less the same thing. And, to be honest, I also like hanging around with you." Ronald and Hillary stared for a minute. Then, he broke the silence finishing his orange juice, and standing up.
"So, want to jog? I'm racing you to the other side of the park." Ronald proposed. Hillary finished her juice, and nodded. A moment later, they were jogging togetherwhile chatting.
"You know, maybe I should give you a fighter nickname, even if you aren't in the team officially. I'm running out of names of big cats to call you by, and you don't look like the kind of guy to call him "Felix" or "Jinks", or some other kitty name." Hillary said.
"Well, if you allow me to think about one for you, then you can choose my nickname as well." Ronald replied. Hillary nodded, and they both started thinking while jogging.
"Let's see… you are big, strong, nice, funny, caring… maybe a descriptive name would be the best, like Big Paw, or Muscle Boy." Hillary told Ronald. The guy rubbed his chin, and nodded.
"I like Muscle Boy… yes, definitely, you can call me that way if you want, or Big Paw at times, if you feel like it. And about you… you are funny as well, plus tough, smart, pretty… how about Steel Girl, or Pretty Puncher?" Ronald asked. Hillary blushed slightly.
"You… really think I'm pretty? You know, you are the first guy that tells me that. The hyenas aren't famous for that characteristic, you know." Hillary said. Minerva already had told her that Ronald considered her good-looking, but never expected him to say it.
"Well, you are the exception to the rule. I think you really are a pretty girl… beautiful, in fact." Ronald replied, blushing a little more. Hillary smiled at him.
"Okay, then I'll be Steel Girl, and, if you feel like it, call me Pretty Puncher if you want…but not in front of anyone else, okay? I want to keep an image." Hillary informed the guy. Ronald chuckled and nodded. At that moment, they heard a couple's fight behind a group of trees. The pair decided to take a look, hiding on the bushes, and recognized the guy.
"Isn't him the duck that was hiding on the trashcan?" Ronald asked in a low voice. Hillary nodded. Drake was having an argument with a pretty red-haired duckmaid that had her hair in a ponytail; he was wearing a red polo shirt and white pants, while she was using a white sweatshirt and a black mini-skirt.
"I don't wanna keep talking about this, Drake." Margot Mallard fumed while showing her back to the duck. Drake didn't take it nicely, and grabbed her by her arm/wing.
"Well, I want to, so you are listening to me. It's bad enough I had to come to this park filled with low-life toons searching for you!" Drake exclaimed.
"You think we should do something?" Ronald whispered to Hillary. The hyena shook her head slightly.
"Let's wait a minute. This is better than a soap-opera… and, besides, we don't know why they are fighting. They are Perfectos, so they maybe had a disagreement about a fiendish plan, like the whole hunting us idea." Hillary whispered back. Both predators kept their heads down and the ears open to find about everything.
"Drake, why are you so interested in Roddy and Ruby's relationship? You should be worried about ours. It seems that you only talk nicely to me when you want me to seduce a fool to get extra information about the next horse race." Margot said, extremely upset. Drake grunted, and poked at her chest.
"I care because Roderick and I have a lot of money invested on next game, and we need all the possible help to fight those Loosers. However, Rhubella hadn't helped us to make plans in a while, and you are always supporting her. As her friend, it's your job to convince her to agree with everything Roddy tells her." Drake pointed. Margot got an angry look.
"And how is she supposed to help him, if Roderick no longer trusts her? When was the last time you saw them having a nice conversation, or having fun together? Actually, when was the last time we did it?" Margot replied. Drake cursed under his breath, and pulled Margot by her arm.
"How dare you question me? I'm Drake Danforth, from the Acme's Danforths, one of the most important families on this state. The Mallards, on the other hand, even if you have money, have a much lower prestige. Remember that stupid older cousin of yours that lives in Saint Canard? He lives in a common house, and adopted a stinky orphan girl. I'm doing you a favor by allowing you to be my girl; that way at least you are connected to the right toons." Drake finished. Margot now was fuming, and struggling to get rid of Drake's grip.
"First of all, my cousin is no stupid. By coincidence, his name is Drake as well, but, luckily, that's the only thing you guys have in common. Yes, he is a common avian, the same kind of guy I love to despise, but, despite that, he had always been the most centered guy of the family. When I was little, he was the only one who didn't care about our image and played with me in public. I hadn't seen him for some time, since he preferred to live his own way in adifferent town, but I still e-mail him once in a while, and guess what? He is doing fine without anyone's help. You, on the other hand, only have your last name, and nothing more! And I came to this park to do my exercising because I had no intentions to see you today!" Margot ended.
Drake got stunned for a few seconds, and then his face got totally red. He raised his fist to punch Margot… but it was caught by a furry paw. Connected to the paw, there was an extremely pissed hyena.
"Excuse me, but, unless you guys are doing a comedic routine, or training for some kind of match, and I really doubt it's any of both cases, I'll not allow you to hit her, jerk!" Hillary growled at the duck. Next to her, Ronald was eying Danforth with an equally furious look. Even if Margot was a Perfecto, this wasn't acting, or training, but plain and simple domestic violence, and that was something neither Hill nor Ron were about to allow.
"Let me got, you low-life scavenger!" Danforth hissed, but was cut by a low growl coming from Ronald's throat.
"Maybe you should watch your beak, pal, or might end up saying something you'll regret later… or we'll make you regret it." Ronald said in a paused yet angry voice. Drake gulped, while Margot was stunned. She had never imagined that a couple of Loosers would be the ones protecting her from Drake the day he would lose his temper.
Drake, however, wasn't defenseless. He took a deep breath, and whistled. One moment later, a huge gorilla on business suit appeared right behind them. Drake smiled.
"Fools. You really thought I would come alone to a place where I might end finding one of you, low life, without having some protection with me?" Danforth chuckled. Hillary and Ron eyed the huge ape. Ronald walked a step on the gorilla's direction.
"Let me handle this one, Hill." Ronald told her. Hillary nodded, without loosing her grip on Drake's wrist.
"Show him, Muscle Boy." Hillary said in a confidant voice, but she was actually worried. This bodyguard was even bigger than Coach Arnold, and seemed to be, at least, twice as heavy as the pitbull.
Ronald and the gorilla eyed each other. Then, they moved closer. The gorilla glared at Ron, and took a deep breath.
GROOOWWWLLLLRRR!
The ape growled at Ronald's face. Ron got petrified for a second, but recovered quickly. He took a deep breath of his own.
GGGRRRRRROOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR!
Ronald's roaring was a lot scarier than the gorilla's growling. It was so scary, actually, that the ape got a white color on his fur, and reduced to the size of a mouse. The gorilla looked up at Ronald, and, after a few seconds, ran away for his life.
"Hey, great job, Big Paw!" Hillary congratulated her friend, extremely impressed. Drake gulped hardly, while Margot smiled widely. The hyena returned her whole attention to the avian on her paw, and smiled.
"Well, since you are not watching your beak, maybe I should place it somewhere you don't need to see it at all." Hillary said in a cool voice.
Hillary took a bottle out from her body's pocket, and forced Drake to drink its content; the duck made a disgusted face, and, after finishing, before he could say anything, Hillary grabbed the avian's beak, and yanked with all her strength, separating it from his face. The hyena then tossed Drake to the ground, and pinned him chest down using her feet, while she took another bottle out from her body's pocket. This one contained glue, and, after covering the beak on her hand with the substance, Hillary pasted it to the duck's butt. When finished, she moved a step back, allowing Drake to stand up.
"Why you… this is the most humiliating situation I had even been!" Drake said, but, this time, he was literally talking by his butt. Hillary chuckled, while Ronald and Margot laughed loudly. Drake glared at the hyena, who now was giving him an innocent smile.
"You'll pay for this, hyena! I'm just gonna…" Drake stopped his ranting because of a sudden stomachache. It was pretty intense, and, the moment he took a look at his rear, got a panicked look. He then tried to separate the beak from his butt, but it was useless. Drake, now sweating bullets, grabbed the beak with both hands/wings, and ran away in a dash, holding his butt.
"I'm afraid to ask, but… what was on the bottle you made him drink from?" Margot asked.
"An industrial strength's laxative. What's going to happen next will be nauseating…but I would pay to see it." Hillary trifled, and, after a moment, the three toons rolled on the floor laughing.
"Steel Girl…you are great!" Ronald chuckled, finally recovering from the laughter, and gave Hillary a high-four. Margot also stopped laughing, and directed to both toons.
"Well…I'm not used to thank anyone for anything, but…thanks a lot for helping me." Margot said in a humble tone. Ron and Hillary smiled at her.
"Hey, it's okay. I'm always pleased to give a jerk a lesson, and that fool is a major one." Hillary replied. Margot smiled at them, and started walking away.
"You know, that was a very noble thing you did for her...even if the method wasn't." Ronald talked to the hyena. Hillary chuckled.
"So, now I'm noble too? You really should stop looking for qualities I don't have, Ronnie. What about you? The way you handled Kong's ugly cousin was awesome! You have a lot of guts, you know that?" Hillary commented.
"Of course I have guts. I jumped into a ring to fight you, remember?" Ronald chuckled. Hillary trifled, and gave him a good-natured punch on his shoulder.
"Come on, I'll walk you home." Ronald said to the hyena while they both started walking out of the park.
Meanwhile, at the city's outsides, a woman dressed entirely in furs directed to her minions, a bunch of octopuses on pirates' outfits, while walking through an open terrain. It was Calamity's property, where he had built the Hobbit-style houses he was selling, and where he and Fifi, along other students, had moved.
"This is the place, Lady Gotcha, madam. According to the Perfectos, many of Acme's players live in this property." One octopus, slightly bigger than the others, directed to the woman. The woman smiled deviously.
"Good. Now, let's check all the houses, and trap any resident we can… even those who aren't players, to leave no witnesses. I'm eager to catch that purple skunk. Once I deodorize her pelt, it will be great for a new hat." Lady Gotcha instructed her minions. But, before they could start checking the houses, a female voice got their attention.
"Over my dead body!" Gotcha and the octopuses turned around, and saw an Afro-American girl sitting on the branches of a nearby tree. Mary got Ronald andWally's messages when she was at town, and hurried back to the terrain, since she lived there too, in case there were hunters around.
"Oh, and what are you going to do to stop us, girl? Don't you know who I am?" Lady Gotcha glared at Mary. The girl shrugged.
"Oh, yes, I know who you are. You are Lady Gotcha, a Cruella DeVille-wanna-be, that uses enough make-up to choke a clown." Mary told her while standing on the branch. Gotcha was about to send the octopuses against her, when Mary made a spin-change into her jungle girl's outfit.
"Don't you know that the natural looks are in? Of course, I once said the same about the cardboard box look, so I'm not very trustable about fashion's advices." Mary said while placing her fists on the hips. The octopuses stared at her, drooling; the girl really looked well on that bikini. Gotcha slapped the back of a couple of her minions, angry.
"Take a picture, it will last longer!" Gotcha yelled. A second later, all the octopuses took cameras out of nowhere (one of them had even a video camera) to get Mary's image. Gotcha slapped her forehead, furious.
"Get her, you fools, or I'll sell all of you to a seafood restaurant!" Gotcha snapped, making all octopuses to finally react, and get a menacing posture. Slowly, they started approaching the tree. Mary cleared her throat, and directed to them.
"And now, to all my fans, a little tune I like to call The Melody of The Jungle. Pun intended." Mary took a deep breath, and yelled, placing her hands around her mouthfor a megaphone-like effect..
NNNNAAAAAHH-AAAAAAAH-AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!
A few seconds later, the earth started rumbling, stopping the octopuses on their tracks, and making Gotcha's fur's hat to fall, while the huntress made an effort to keep balance. After a moment, one of the octopuses looked at the distance, and got a scared look. Gotcha looked at the same direction, and wide opened her eyes in fear.
"NOOO! STOP! I DON'T HUNT FOR IVORY!" The huntress screamed while moving her hands in front of her in defense, while the octopuses screamed.
RRRRRMMMMMBBBBBBLLLLLLRRRRRMMMMMBBBBLLLLLLL...!
Gotcha and her gang were caught in the middle of an elephants' stampede that lasted almost one minute. Once the beasts were gone, Gotcha and the octopuses were totally flattened against the ground.
Mary jumped down from the tree, and started folding them as if they were papers, at enhanced toon's speed, while whistling the Tiny Toons Adventures' theme song. Once she was done, the girl placed the flat villains on a large envelope, and walked next to the mailbox of the closest house. Then, she placed a few stamps on the envelope, and placed it inside the mailbox; a second later, Beeper appeared on scene, on a mailman's outfit. The little bird took the envelope, and dashed away. Mary made her spin-change back to normal.
"I wonder if sending a woman on heavy clothing and a bunch of sea creatures to The Sahara Desert was too much." Mary thought while rubbing her chin.
"Naah!" The girl concluded, and, smiling, directed to her house.
Back in town, Ron dropped Hill at her house's door.
"Well, here I am. Thanks for the laughter, Ron. This jogging session was a lot more interesting that I thought it might be." Hillary told the guy. Ronald and her shook paws, and he started walking away. Before being out of sight, Ronald turned to give her a last look, and directed to her.
"And I don't need to look for qualities you don't have, Hillary. You have a lot of them." Ronald said while waving good bye. Hillary smiled, and entered her house. She gave a look at the direction Ron was now getting out of sight.
"You called me beautiful… You don't look so bad either, pal." Hillary whispered before closing the door.