Disclaimer: We own nothing to do with Tomb Raider or Lara Croft, Lord of the Rings, James Bond nor anything else in this fic.
Exception: Vorserkeien, Lightning and the 'Danny Inn' were created by us. Contact us first if you wish to use them.
Monday"Vorsie, will you please put that phone down and come and assist me."
It was approaching 10 o'clock on what was going to be a very busy Monday. Lightning went over the checklist.
"Let me see, done, done, done, done, done, done, do…"
The first phone call of the day. Lightning was glad that Susie would be coming soon. Susie was one of the receptionists and came at 10 o'clock, where as the rest came at 11. They all left at 5 pm. Lightning picked up the phone.
"Hello, The Danny… Lara, what's the hurry? No I haven't had a phone call off him… OK, when will you be here? … Fine. Bye."
She put down the phone and headed for the stairs.
"Where are you going?" asked Vorserkeien.
"Lara phoned up. She said that Mr. Powell and Mr. West are coming today with a load of troops. She's coming here and might stay for the night. I'm tidying up a room or her."
"Why can't she go home for the night? Can Legolas come round if Lara is coming round?"
"NO! Lara is coming here for business, not for enjoyment. Now if you want to be useful you can help me."
Sulkily Vorserkeien followed Lightning upstairs.
"Which level will she be on?" questioned Vorserkeien.
"Only the first."
"Thank goodness. Knowing you, you would probably put her on the 7th or something."
"Was that comment really necessary?"
There was no answer. Lightning opened the door of one of the rooms. She got out a cleaning cloth from a box outside the door and chucked it at Vorserkeien. Then she got one out for herself.
It took about 1 hour to get the room ready and by that time all the staff had arrived. Vorserkeien hurried out of the hotel to go and meet Legolas and Lightning was just strolling down the stairs when she heard shouting,
"YES, I WANTED 20 ROOMS...NO NOT JUST FOR ME. THE OTHERS ARE COMING LATER… JUST GIVE ME A KEY… THANK YOU!"
Lightning smiled. Picking up her mobile, she typed in Lara's number.
"Lara, Mr. 'North' is here… Come into the hotel if you are outside."
She walked slowly down the stairs. With a bit of luck Alex West wouldn't recognise her, then she would have fun. Luck was with her.
"Hi. Do you know where room 201 is…err, please?" asked Alex West
"Are you Mr. North?"
"Yup."
"This is England, not America, it is YES not YUP."
"Fine … YU…err YES. Do I know you?"
"I think the question is do I know you? Are you really Mr. North or are you Alex West, a tomb raider and you are here with 80 troops and Mr. Powell?"
"How on EARTH did you know that? Two troops sleep on the floor in each room by the way."
"I figured that out."
"So how did you know that?" Lightning saw Alex put his hand inside his jacket pocket.
"Ooooooooo, getting worried are we? Let me give you a clue. The last time I saw you was a couple of years back, while getting that mythical sea stone, but we have met before that. Do you remember?"
Alex remembered. He remembered being punched rather hardly in the stomach by a lady with light blonde hair with white streaks throughout. He had also heard rumours that she had mutant friends. Alex looked up to see that exact person smiling. She was obviously enjoying herself.
"Why you…"he growled. He sent out a flying punch, but to his surprise she wasn't affected. It was like it had never touched her skin…
"Was that supposed to hurt me?" Lightning asked, "Your room is along the corridor on the 1st floor. Oh, by the way, you aren't supposed to have any weapons of any sort in the hotel, but I presume that as the rest are going to be armed with goodness knows what, I'm going to have to say that you're allowed them but they must be kept in your rooms and must not be brought into any other room in the hotel. Understood?"
Alex glared at her,
"I SAID IS THAT UNDERSTOOD?"
"Yup … err … yes."
"Good. Now move it!"
Lightning watched Alex run along the corridor and open the door to one of the rooms. It was only when the door was closed when she burst out into laughter. After she had finished laughing, she made her way downstairs. Vorserkeien was home. Lightning could tell that by the jacket that lay on the chair. She picked it up and put it behind the desk. That was when Lara walked in.
"So where is Mr. 'North' then?" she asked
"In his room. I think he got a bit of a shock."
"Great, so where's my room?"
"Right next to his."
Lightning started walking up the stairs, closely followed by Lara. They walked along the corridor and stopped at a door.
"Okay, I'll see you in a couple of minutes in the entrance hall." Said Lara, "and I might visit Mr. West!"
Lightning walked down the stairs. Vorserkeien was at the bottom.
"Legolas IS coming tonight, he's here already," said Vorserkeien.
"Okay, fine, whatever. I don't really care."
"I said there isn't a spare room, so I said he could sleep in my room."
"Really, that's very kind of you."
Without letting Vorserkeien answer, Lightning dismissed the receptionists and stood behind the desk. After a couple of minutes Lara appeared at the bottom of the stairs. She was wearing black shorts and t-shirt.
"Another person who doesn't dress to regulations." sighed Lightning
"Can't say you are any better. Black shorts with a turquoise t-shirt. Anyway it is really hot."
"Point taken." Replied Lightning. Then she heard Vorserkeien calling from upstairs.
"Has anyone seen my jacket?"
"Down here," shouted Lightning, "Come and get it."
"Can't you bring it up here?"
"Come down and get it, lazy chops."
"No, bring it up here, you thunderous typhoon."
NO, come and get it Miss. Oh I can't feel like going back up into space because Leggy isn't there so I will just have to stay on Earth until Leggy will come up with me."
"NO, I can do better than that Miss. Oh I am a Tomb Raider and I can control lightning and I don't want a boyfriend because Danny the Shetland pony is my boyfriend and he is ssssssssssssoooooooooooo fat and cute and he's never even tried to bite me but has bitten everyone else. Bet you can't beat that, Lighting!" retorted Vorserkeien.
"I bet I can and don't call me that! Miss. I love Leggy ssssssssssssooooooooooooooooo much because he is sssssssssssssssssoooooooooooooooo tall andssssssssssssssssooooooooooooooo…………………
This argument went on for ages, and had attracted the whole hotel by the time it had finished. Lara had got bored, grabbed the jacket and threw it up to Vorserkeien.
"There, does that end the argument?"
Lightning smiled at Lara "That wasn't an argument, we do it all the time!"
She laughed as she saw Lara's amazed face.
"Come on everyone, back to work now!" shouted Vorserkeien. One by one, everyone parted, to leave the hotel quiet again.
"So, you do that all the time." Said Lara for the hundredth time.
"YES. Now lets get back to reception. You never know, maybe someone might be here."
By the time they arrived at reception, they noticed that there were suitcases on the reception desk. Someone was here.
Susie was at the desk. Before either of them could ask, Susie gave them the answer.
"Guy called 007. Not Mr. Goggles, soz."
"Errrrrrrrrrrrr, ok. Thanks Susie. Lightning, how about a swim?" Asked Lara.
"But you know I hate wa…okay then." Lightning had caught the dangerous glare in Lara's eye.
When the two 'ladies' had reached the pool, they noticed Vorserkeien and Legolas in it. They had obviously sneaked in the back way. Lightning hoped that Vorserkeien wouldn't notice her. She had had enough of being pushed into the pool. (AN: they are still in normal clothes.)
They sat on the side of the pool and it was a couple of minutes before Lara spoke.
"YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT JAMES BOND WAS COMING HERE!" She shouted, "THIS COULD CHANGE EVERYTHING! IMAGINE WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE IF HE JOINED THEM! I MEAN WHO WOULD HE JOIN, A WHOLE GROUP OF FIGHTERS OR 2 GIRLS?"
"Errrrrrrrr…2 girls to tell you the truth. Listen, he'll be on the same side of any woman who takes his fancy."
At this point they found themselves in the middle of the swimming pool. Lara spun round to see Alex West at the side, laughing. However, he was not laughing for much longer. Vorserkeien, who had been watching him, had scrambled out of the deep end and had neatly sent Alex into the water next to Lightning but he did not stay there for very long either. Lightning had got a bit of lightning from her brain and had sent it to her hand. From her hand she had sent it into the water, which flew across the water into Alex, giving him a very powerful electric shock. This happened in about 1 second. Alex hurried out onto the poolside, where he saw Vorserkeien tutting at him and saying "Now do you see why you shouldn't push people into the swimming pool without their knowledge?"
Just then to Lightning's further embarrassment, Susie came in announcing that 80 men and a man who called himself Mr. Goggles when he had booked, but that wasn't in fact his real name, had arrived.
"Great. I think I could just about kill the person who said that 'things can only get better'." Said Lightning.
"You? You're not the person working for him. Honestly, how am I supposed to greet him when I'm completely soaked? Huh?"
"Well, that is you fault."
"No it's not. It's her fault for pushing me in." He jerked his head towards Vorserkeien.
"Yes, but it's your fault for pushing them in. If you hadn't done that then I wouldn't have pushed you in." was his slightly irritated reply from Vorserkeien.
"Oh shut up both of you…"
"You started it."
Lightning glared at Vorserkeien, before turning to Susie, "Susie, can you sort out their rooms and tell them I apologise for not being there? Tell them I was…There was a slight problem elsewhere which I had to sort out. Oh and also tell them that Mr West very kindly agreed to help me."
Susie nodded and left.
"Right. Vorsie, show Mr West back to his room via the back door. And just remember Alex that you owe me one."
He left with Vorserkeien and Legolas, who were whispering to each other and looked very much like they were planning some sort of sabotage.
"Hmm, I think you've got your hands full with them."
"Thank you. That was a very helpful warning. But Lara, I've know that for a long time."
"Sorry. Shall we go and get changed? Because, I for one, don't fancy any of them knowing that West successfully pushed 2 Tomb Raiders into a swimming pool fully clothed."
Lightning agreed and the pair left to prepare for a very eventful Monday.
TBC…
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