Tasuki and Chiriko were skipping daintily through the fields, hand in hand, as Nuriko followed along grudgingly.
" You told me that this would be manly," he muttered. " Well it doesn't seem very manly to me."
" Nuriko-sama doesn't seem to be very happy," Chiriko said softly to Tasuki.
" No he doesn't, does he? Poor Nuriko-sama. Don't worry, he'll feel better once we start picking the flowers," the bandit assured him.
Chiriko nodded happily and gazed up at Tasuki. " Your eyes are so pretty, Tasuki-chan."
Tasuki flushed and held a hand to his cheek. " Oh, shush," he giggled.
" What are you two morons playing at!" yelled Nuriko. " Stop being so fucking unmanly, you pansies!"
His companions sniffled and sighed. " Nuriko-sama's so mean and... masculine. I wish we could be like him," they said in unison.
" Tamahome, why the freak are we in this freaking place!"
" I told you earlier; I'm going to donate some money."
" What! But I told you that you couldn't freaking do that!"
" Miaka-chan, stop ordering me about, you're not the boss of me!"
" Yes I freaking am! Now get on your knees!"
" What? In front of the kids?"
" Hello Sir and Madame, welcome to Orphans 'R' us, your one stop shop for orphans."
" No, no, I don't want to but any orphans, I just want to give you some money. Here, I'll write you out a cheque."
" Oh no you will not! Give me that freaking pen!"
" No, it's mine!"
" Give it, or I'll be forced to take out the freaking whip."
" Ooh, whips. Visions of Nakago in a Sailor Fuku..."
" What the freak!"
" Ow! Miaka-chan, that was my eye!"
" I know, you freak!"
" Er, Sir? Madame?"
" Hotohori-sama? Will you please come out from under that tablecloth, no da?" Chichiri asked him.
" No! I don't want to hurt you with my ugliness!" came Hotohori's muffled reply.
" But I want you to try my magical cookies, no da. Plus they may cure your affliction, no da."
Hotohori peeked out from under the tablecloth. " Huh? My affliction? Then you do think I'm ugly?"
" Yes indeed. But never mind about that, let's just make love, no da."
Hotohori leapt up in alarm. " What!" he shrieked.
" I wasn't talking to you, no da! I was talking to the purple elephant, the shiny, pretty purple elephant, no da." He started stroking a rather frightened looking Tama-Neko. " Good purple elephant... soft..."
" I'm scared!" Hotohori cried, hugging the tablecloth fearfully.
Meanwhile, Mitsukake and the two very busty female (named Sunny and er...Spanky) were in the middle of getting it on, when the Seiryuu Seishi and their Miko suddenly appeared in the middle of the room.
" Duuude! Those three are like totally having sex!" Yui exclaimed, whipping out her camera from only Seiryuu knows where.
" Totally!"
" Soi, I told you to stop saying that, it's so annoying."
" Heh, this coming from the cross-dressing wolfman."
" Shut up Tomo! And I'm not a wolfman, I just have an abnormal amount of body hair!"
" Hey, guys, how did we get here anyway?" Suboshi asked. " I didn't think any of us could teleport."
Miboshi shrugged. " It's probably just a plot convenience. But either way, it's all Blondie's fault!"
Nakago, who had still been hugging Amiboshi, sniffled and snuggled closer to him. " It's not fair, they're all being so mean to me. But you'll protect me, won't you Ami-chan?"
" Of course I will Nakkie-chan, I'll protect you for...AH! THERE'S A BIRD ON THAT WINDOWSILL!"
" HEY!"
Everyone stopped talking at Mitsukake's sudden yell, and turned to gave at the naked healer.
" Do you mind? I'm trying to have sex here!"
The Seiryuu gang blushed and all made a run for the door.
Amiboshi had to drag Nakago through the doorway, since the poor dear, having got upset when he realised that people were having sex in front of him, had proceeded to collapse to the floor and cry about how his innocence had been taken.
Poor, poor, stupid Blondie... Pie!
Back outside, Tasuki, Chiriko and Nuriko were enjoying a cute, scenic picnic. Well actually, Tasuki and Chiriko were enjoying it, while Nuriko was just complaining about having to drink his tea out of a bright pink cup.
" It's just too... girly." He had explained, shuddering at the thought of doing anything girly.
It was at that moment that the Seiryuu Seishi appeared in front of them too, much to the shock of Tasuki and Chiriko, who screamed like idiots and started fear-hugging.
" Ah! It's a bunch of scary men!" Tasuki gulped.
" Hey! I'm a woman, you clonk!"
Everyone ignored Yui's protest, as they were much more interested in watching Nakago, as he started to feel up a tree.
" You're very hard," he told it, before holding his hand to his mouth and giggling like a little girl. " Tee-hee, I said it was hard!"
Nuriko apparently found this hilarious, as he burst out laughing. " He called it hard! That's so manly! But wait, he then giggled like a girl... like a sissy! ...I'M CONFUSED!"
Nuriko fell to the ground, clutching at his head, the situation having become too much for him.
" ...I like pie!" Soi announced.
" Shut up Soi!"
The end… of part three!
And now, here's some episode 33 inspired mini-stories. BEWARE! There be spoilers for episode 33 up ahead. So you shouldn't read it if you haven't watched it yet.
OK, bring on the insanity!
SCENE 1
CHICHIRI:" Hey! I sense that one of us is in danger! Up on that mountain! Let's teleport, people!"
(Teleport! Teleport)
MITSUKAKE:" Oh no! Nuriko's injured! Heal! Heal!"
TAMAHOME:" OK, Nuriko's all better! Let's go!"
NURIKO:" Er, can I get up first?"
EVERYONE ELSE:" No!"
NURIKO: Oo;
SCENE 2
NURIKO:" Onegai, Give me the strength that I need!"
SUZAKU:" OK!"
(Strength! Strength!)
SUZAKU:" Now you can move that giant boulder! Yay!"
NURIKO:" Oh, good... hey, wait a minute. If you can give me enough strength to move the boulder, then why don't you just give me the strength to live until Mitsukake can get here and heal me?"
SUZAKU:" Er..."
NURIKO:" I mean, surely it would be more useful for you, having all of your Seishi alive?"
SUZAKU:" ...Shut up!"
NURIKO:" That's not really a very good argument..." ;;
SUZAKU:" I know, but I can't think of a better one."
NURIKO:" ..."
SUZAKU:" Oh, just hurry up and die, will you!"
THE END! I hope you enjoyed them!