Chapter Fifteen: Something New, Something Blue

Sky woke up. Again. He was tired of waking up. It was never any fun. Not only did he have to stare at a ridiculously low ceiling and feel a ridiculously hard not-a-bed, but he had to actually stand up and do farm stuff. Dull.

Today, thankfully, something different but strangely familiar happened. Sky woke up to a big pair of glowing red eyes.

"AHHHHHH!"

He jumped up, hit the ridiculously low ceiling, then fell down and hit the ridiculously hard bed. The elves laughed maniacally.

"Hey, I thought you guys only came out at night." Sky complained. "Don't you like, sleep in coffins or something?"

"No, we—"

"Sleep in a—"

"Tree. But that is—"

"Unimportant right now."

They kept finishing each other's sentences, and Sky got all confused. "What?" He mumbled with a loud yawn.

"Forget it." Nak said. "You ought to be thankful we showed up this morning. We were going to cause a nuclear war in the Bahamas, but instead we got stuck here, reminding you that you have lived in Forget-Me-Not Valley for exactly one year now."

"Oh." Sky stood up and rubbed his poorly abused body. "No wonder I kept forgetting stuff. This place does stuff to you. Like…oh I can't remember what…"

"Today you have to get married." Nik declared.

Sky's jaw dropped to the floor. "WHAT?"

"Yeah. Either that, or you shall burn. So have you picked a girl out? 'Cause if you don't, we can choose one for you…"

"A small one…"

"With sharp, pointy teeth…"

"Whoa, hold it!" Sky put his foot down. "Listen, I am not going to get married. Only old people get married."

"Says who?" The three elves said.

"Says me!" Sky said.

"Oh, well that explains all that gray hair you have." Flak said.

"WHAT?" Sky ran to a mirror, but his hair was just as brown as ever.

"Psyche!" Flak laughed.

"You guys are mean!"

"Listen, go get hitched, okay? We already got everything set up for you. All you have to do is show a girl a blue feather, and you'll be hitched before nightfall.

"I DO NOT WANT TO GET HITCHED!" Sky yelled

Suddenly, he blinked, and the elves were gone. All that remained was a tiny dust devil.

"We'll be waiting." An eerie voice rang through the shack.

Sky sighed, and then he thought. This was a difficult and grueling process, but he made it work. He turned on the television, then he turned it off, then he picked up a stick, then he put it down, then he picked up a pot, then he hit his bed with the pot, then he put it down. Finally, he decided what fate has already decided for him.

"Looks like I'm going to have to get married." He muttered bitterly.

He left his house-that-is-not-a-house and went out in the bright, beautiful sunshine. Apple and Ali were in the grassy area, munching on grass. Apple was neighing a song and Ali was mooing a happy tune.

"What's with you guys, today?" Sky asked.

"You're going to get married." Ali declared through a moo.

"How do you know?"

"Because it is part of the Plan, dofus." Ali said.

Sky eyed her curiously, "Ya know, If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were getting smarter."

Ali went on munching.

"This place does stuff to you." The eerie voice told him.

"Shut up, voice-in-my-head." Sky marched over to the tool shed. He shoved away a couple thousand dust mites and eventually found the blue feather hiding on the floor. Suddenly, Sky got this strange vision of him bursting into flames the minute he touched the feather. Then the vision went away, and he picked up the feather and for a moment thought he caught on fire, but he didn't so everything was ok. He left the tool shed, and everything was normal again.

He walked up the hill while creating a list of Very Weird Words to call the elves. For some reason, the Very Dirty Words seemed to have no effect on him. He must find their weakness!

He spotted Celia out on her vegetable farm, holding a carrot. Boldly, Sky walked up to her.

"Hi, Sky." Celia giggled and hugged her carrot.

"Hey, Celia." Sky said, the essence of smoothness. "Will you—"

"Marry you?" Celia finished for him and she giggled again. "Is that what you were going to ask?"

"Uhh—"

"Because I can't. It doesn't rhyme. 'Marry Sky'. I heard the Harvest Sprite gig. And I must say that its impossible. Now, if I were to 'Lie to Sky' then that would work. But I couldn't lie to you because I'm already telling you the truth, aren't I? By the way, Sky, did you ever give your bike to that Mike guy?"

"Uhh…mhmph…"

"Because I think that the Mike guy might like my carrot. It looks like a ferret, and I heard he loved ferrets. So that works out, right?"

"Heh…umm…"

"Great. Sorry about the whole marriage deal. Bye, Sky." She waved her carrot at Sky and then went back to tramping through the vegetable garden. Sky looked at the blue feather in his hand, then gave a desperate little sigh that sounded like a cross between a hurricane wind and a wounded lion. He gazed back to the fading figure of Celia, "That was just depressing." He muttered, then went back down the hill.

He spotted Flora at her usual spot, digging up rare and amazingly dull rocks that are worth a fortune. A rare idea came to Sky's head, which was unusual enough on this unusual day. He was Sky the Brave, Sky the Valliant, Sky the Independent! Who was he to take orders from little bitty elves that happened to be evil? He was no mere worm! He would not be squashed!

He avoided being run over by a dust devil and jumped across the river. He threw the blue feather in Flora's face. "Will you marry me?" He stuttered out.

Flora looked at him like, well, most people looked at him. Like he was insane. "Why?" She asked.

"Uhh…because I got a blue feather?" Sky pointed out.

"Yes, what a disgusting thing it is!" Flora jumped back from the feather like it was a poisonous snake. "I can't believe you would do such a thing to me, Sky! I thought we were friends! And then you show that…that…blue…thing to me! I even thought that…someday…we might be…" Her lip quivered, "More than friends," a tear fell in her eye, "But now, that will never happen. I should have known better. Good day to you, Sky!" Holding her head up high, Flora went over to her professor.

Sky looked down at the feather.

Sky looked up at Flora.

Sky looked down at the feather.

Sky looked up at the chicken.

Sky looked down at the feather.

"Okay, that was just really depressing and…disturbing." Sky muttered. Then he shrugged his shoulders and continued going down the hill.

He spotted Nami at the inn, holding a pair of matches and poised to light the fern next to the inn's front door on fire. Just as the fern began to sparkle with glowing red and orange fuzz balls, Sky ran straight through it. But his invulnerable clothes did not catch on fire. "Hey, Nami." Sky said.

"Hey, Sky." Nami replied.

"What's going on?" Sky asked.

"Nothing much. Really. Nothing. You shouldn't be asking me questions like that. You know how dangerous it is!"

"Oh…right…" Sky held out the blue feather. "Will you marry me?"

Nami looked at the feather with wide eyes for a moment, then looked up at Sky. "I told you not to ask me questions like that!" She yelled.

"Oh…oops." Sky kicked the dirt in embarrassment.

Nami patted him on the back. "Ah, it's okay. Don't worry. I forgive you. Get married, huh? Sounds like fun. And if I do that, then I have an excuse not to go on that mis—I mean, to go to Somewhere. So…I might do it."

Sky bent down on one knee and held the feather up to her like a trophy. "Just say yes." He said romantically, "And make me the happiest man alive."

He thought he did pretty good, but Nami just snorted. "Lame." She said. "But I'll say yes, nonetheless. I can't say no. Not with that pretty blue feather you gave me." She took it and twirled it in her hand. Then she took a match and lit it on fire. She watched it burn to cinders and then said, "Okay, let's get married."

Suddenly, there was a great poofing sound and a swirl of magical smoky dust appeared around the two of them. Then Sky mysteriously emerged on top of the hill between his farm and Celia's farm. Every resident of Forget-Me-Not-Valley was there, all waving and crying with joy. Sky was wearing a classy 007 tux while Nami looked no different. A man holding a book came up, said some stuff, and then they were married. Every waved and hollered. Then Lumina ran up to Sky and kicked him hard in the shin. Sky yelped like a girl and held his knee in pain. "What was that for? You're not supposed to touch the man in the tux!" He cried.

"That's what you get! I had a crush on you, you know. And you just go and…get married! This is so unfair!" And then Lumina ran off to find Kill.

Then Daryl came and stood in front of Sky. "Live long and prosper." He said, shook his head, then left.

Sky felt deeply insulted.

A great big bang came out of the blue as Nami sent a whole bunch of gigantic fireworks up into the twilight sky. There was an even bigger bang when they exploded and an even bigger big bang as Nami cried out triumphantly and marveled at the pretty colors. And they were pretty colors indeed, and everyone was pleased.

Finally, the ceremony was over and everyone went home. Sky and Nami walked very dramatically down the hill towards his farm, hand in hand. They went in slow motion and a mysterious song appeared in the air and played endlessly for eternity.

"What now?" Nami asked.

"I dunno. I want a bigger house. Can I get a bigger house now?"

"Sure, I'll build one for you."

"You will?"

"Sure. But it has to be made of wood so that I can burn it down later."

"Sounds good to me."

And they went inside the house. Little did they know, however, that the story was not over. As they disappeared into happiness, Takakura stood outside his front door, watching them.

"Looks like you raised a good boy there." Takakura said to what was supposedly Sky's dad, but that could never be proven by modern science. "Actually managed to do something right, I'm impressed. Still needs to work on his naming skills, though. And in all this time, he never went to the big oak tree by the pond. He thinks he's done. He thinks that he can live in peace now."

Suddenly, in the coming darkness, Takakura's eyes lit up a glowing red. "Too bad the worse is next to come." He laughed maniacally, and walked into the distance.

To Be Continued…spooky music here