Fear Factor: DNAngel

By Lazy Kitsune

Summary: All the contestants must face their fears and succeed in the stunts! Winner receives a big prize in the end! For who is fear not a factor?

Disclaimer: I don't own DNAngel or Fear Factor. (sniff)

Warnings: Very graphic, EXTREME cases of character bashing (coughrisacough), bad language, suggestive themes, very mild hints of shonen-ai (that probably turned off a lot of readers by now), mild violence, rated T for Teen, not for the faint of heart

A/N: OMG, I am so so so so so so sorry times…ten…to the…infinitith power! (cries) I know, I know, you all want to stone me to death for all this major procrastination! (sobs) I'm lucky if at least one reader is still here…Okay, I'm done being histrionic. Let's see, who hasn't gone yet…?

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Chapter 7 – Qualification Stunt…WTF, we're still on the Qualification Stunts!

So, before the pathetic authoress went on a vacation for about half a year (I am so sorry!), we left off with Krad finishing his stunt and Satoshi about to jump into the pool of electrocuted water. Oh wait, scratch that last part, Satoshi hasn't gotten to that state of mind…yet…

Anyways, who will be the one to go next? Who will face the challenge, wiling to risk all they have for the elusive grand prize? What a bunch of stupid questions, I should know! I know all! I am the almighty, omniscient storyteller! I know the past, present, and future! I am Oz! I will rule the world! Bow down to your master and –

"Who the heck is writing this crap?" Joe asked, raising an eyebrow. "And why the heck did half a year pass and we're still on the qualification stunts!"

"WTF, we're still on the qualification stunts!" Riku shouted out in her unnaturally high-pitched voice.

"Obviouthlee," Bobo said, rolling his eyes. He was now painting his newly filed nails, just in case anyone is curious.

"Uhh…shouldn't you have lost all your nails by now, filing them for half a year and so?" Daisuke asked.

"Oh pleathe, don't ruin it for me," Bobo snapped. "I'm only the authoress' amazing puppet."

"…"

"ANYways," Emiko said, her usual optimistic smile now turned into a wince after being stuck for half a year, "shouldn't we be trying to figure out who goes next?"

"Or," Kosuke chimed in hopefully, "we can end this sorry excuse of a story and just say someone won…?"

"Then I say I win," Risa said in her Disney- style chipmunk voice.

"You didn't even go up," Satoshi said, trying not to roll his eyes. "It's impossible for you to win."

Risa glared. "You're just jealous!"

Satoshi looked her up and down, and raised an eyebrow. "Of what?"

"Not much, obviously," Krad said, a smug smirk forming on his face as he leaned on Satoshi's shoulder, who merely shrugged him off and glared.

Joe massaged his temples. "Okay, let's just get this over with," he said briskly as Risa opened her mouth. "You – girl with the helium voice who hasn't gone yet –"

Krad snickered as Risa spun around and glared at our stressed out host. "I have a name!"

"Congratulations," Joe said, sarcastically clapping, "now get on the unicycle so we can go already."

Risa sniffed. "No one appreciates a good woman these days," she said histrionically as she got on the unicycle.

Half the people behind her rolled their eyes; the other half mentally flipped her off.

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A/N: That was just a chapter to get us back on track. Now…let's see who hasn't lost faith in this pathetic excuse of a lazy authoress…. (wince)