Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Thanks to all my reviewers:) It makes me feel very loved. Bobthedog and CSG4ME, I'm glad you guys liked the sex slave line. I almost took it out because it may have been received badly, but I kept it in cause I thought it was awesome. I guess. So…yeah. :) Thanks for the reviews, everyone.

Ally: Maybe I'd reply to your reviews more often if you'd send me 'the crap' as you so succinctly termed it. –glare- And I have a secret for you, I haven't a clue what avt means. So…stop being lazy! Just type it out ;) And btw, is spaz supposed to be a compliment? Speaking of pain meds, the little Kyle, Nicole, Eric interaction is awesome, no? (And if you ask me how pain meds and that scene are related, I may have to beat you with a spoon)

Chapter 6

Stephanie stared at me and, for once, seemed speechless. We were halfway to 'the Batcave' by the time she spoke.

"So…You said the Batcave is forever." She was silent for a while, and I didn't respond. I could sense a question in that statement, but I wasn't going to attempt to reply to it until she asked it.

"So…well?" You've got to be impressed with the woman's conversational skills. They rival Tank's, really.

"Uh, Babe?" You ask a sucky question, you get a sucky answer. If she wanted a better answer, she was going to have to be a bit more verbal. Turning up a road, I came in sight of a large set of gates. I pulled out my cell phone and called Tank. "Let me in." Then I hung up. Of course, based on that phone call, I guess I couldn't really criticize anyone else's eloquence, or lack thereof.

Just as I pulled up to the gates, they opened, and I drove through. The road went between some trees and then around a corner. I heard Stephanie's gasp, but I kept going. My house was, as I've said before, huge. It had two floors, three if you count the basement. The basement housed a gym, a control center, and a parking garage (which I went down a ramp to right now). I parked and, followed by a speechless Stephanie, walked to the elevator, going to the second floor. The doors opened and I stepped out. The doors started closing and I put my hand back to stop them.

"Babe?" Stephanie looked at me, then stepped out of the elevator. We were in a long hall. I walked down it, pointing as I went. "There's a bathroom through that door. That door is my bedroom." I pointed to a door right across from my bedroom. "That's where you'll be staying." I opened the door and stepped in. "There's a closet over there and a bathroom through that door over there." I turned to Stephanie.

She looked at me, then over at the closet. "I don't have any clothes."

I shook my head. "I had Tank go pack a bunch of clothes for you. There are two big bags in the closet with your clothes."

Stephanie nodded, then she blushed. "Wait! Tank dug through all my clothes?"

"Babe." I grinned. "I'm sure he didn't care. He's married, so if he's not used to seeing women's clothes by now, something is wrong."

She glared at me. "I don't care about him. I care! I don't want someone looking at all my underwear and—" She stopped. "Wait, Tank's married!"

I nodded. "To Emily. You didn't see her last night, but she was in the waiting room. She didn't go into your room because you don't actually know her." I'd almost said that Emily didn't know Stephanie, but after living with three men who did know Stephanie (and one who was in love with her) Emily had heard enough stories that she might as well know Stephanie. "We're over the central living area. On the ground floor, there is a big living room and a kitchen. Emily and Tank live in a wing that goes off this area. Their wing has a bunch of bedrooms, a smaller kitchen, and a smaller living room. Bobby and Lester live in another wing that's basically the same. We all use the big kitchen and living room, though, otherwise this house feels way too big."

Stephanie just stared at me. "Babe?" Finally, she snapped out of her silence and returned to our earlier discussion (if you can call 11 words, only 2 of which were from me, a discussion). "So, why did you bring me to the Batcave?"

I shrugged. "You need to recover and this is a safe place to do that."

"But what about the whole, Batcave is forever, thing?"

I didn't really have any idea how to respond, so I just shrugged. "If you want to sleep a little, that's fine. Dinner is at six." It was five right now.

Stephanie looked like she was wavering between wanting to ask me more questions and wanting to sleep. I could see she was really tired. "Go to sleep, Babe. If you need anything, there's an intercom system." I showed her how to work the intercom, then I went down to the living room.

As I'd pretty much expected, my other housemates were all there. They all looked at me as the elevator opened and I stepped out, but Lester was the first to speak.

"So, Tank has filled us in on your whole 'woo the Bombshell' plan. Or rather, the fact that you don't have one. I don't really see what the problem is. You have her in your house; just refuse to let her leave until she marries you, or something." I raised an eyebrow. "Ok, I guess that's not a great plan, either. I don't know."

I looked at Tank. "Do you have any suggestions?"

"You could just go with the obvious solution and tell her you love her then propose."

"So glad I consulted you. You've given me insight I'd never have gained on my own." Now I looked at Bobby. "K, you're my last chance. Bobby, do you have any good ideas?"

Emily spoke up now, sounding sort of annoyed. "What do you mean Bobby is your last chance? What about me?"

I shook my head. "If your suggestions are anything like your last one, I don't even want to hear it."

She glared at me. "My suggestion would work."

"Yeah, if I ever did it, which I have no intention of doing."

Lester interrupted whatever Emily had been about to say. "What I think is that we're approaching this from much too much of a 'Ric does everything' viewpoint. Judging from history, Ric is emotionally inept." They all knew about my previous idiotic actions, such as the debt and then sending her back to Morelli. Lester ignored my glare, as I'd known he would. "If we wait for Ric to propose, it won't ever happen."

Now it was Bobby who cut in. "So what, we should do it for him? 'Hi, Stephanie. Will you marry Ric? He is emotionally inept and isn't ever going to do this for himself, so will you marry him and make him stop sulking, please?' That'll work brilliantly."

I glared at Bobby. "What are you talking about? I don't sulk."

Tank rolled his eyes. "Right, you're just staring out the window for hours at a time because you like watching the flying pigs."

Fine, it was true. But I'd only sulked for more than an hour at a time after I sent Stephanie back to Morelli and then another time when she went home with Morelli after the Slayer incident.

Lester started speaking again. "Anyway, as I was trying to say before I was so rudely interrupted, we should help Ric. Obviously, we won't propose for him." He glared at Bobby. "But we could help the process along a bit. For example, tonight, during dinner, we could casually drop into the conversation points that illustrate what a great catch Ric is. Then, after dinner, Emily can ask to talk to her and do the whole 'girl talk' thing. Then, Emily, you get her to admit that she loves Ric. Ric, you'll be waiting out of sight but within ear shot and then you can jump in and say something like 'well then, since you love me, and I love you, marry me!' See? I'm brilliant!"

We all just stared at him for a bit and then I spoke. "So, let me get this straight. You're plan is to tack complimentary comments about me on to various sentences, such as 'Will you pass the pepper, and isn't Ranger looking super sexy tonight?' and then, after dinner, I'm supposed to ambush her?"

Lester was pensive for a moment then frowned. "Hmm. Well, it sounded better in my head. I think it's a good plan, though, and you are just saying it in a very negative way. I think it would work. Definitely better than anything you've done so far. Besides, maybe we could mumble the complimentary things. And then, consciously, Stephanie wouldn't know what we said, but her subconscious mind would pick it up and by the end of the night, she'll ask Ric to marry her!" When none of us responded with more than a skeptical 'are you trying to be stupid?' look, he sighed. "Fine, whatever! But when we're all eighty years old and Ric is still moping over Stephanie, no one can blame me!"

Emily got up. "Alright, I need to go check on dinner." She left and came back moments later. "Ok, it's done. Someone go wake up Stephanie."

I got up and went to the elevator, going upstairs and into Stephanie's room. I gently touched her shoulder. "Wake up, Babe." She didn't. I shook her gently. She stirred slightly, then slowly opened her eyes and looked up at me. "Time for dinner, Babe."

She nodded and sat up. She got out of bed and yawned. She winced and looked at me. "I want some more pain medicine."

I nodded and quickly got a glass of water and the pills. She swallowed it and then followed me to the elevator. We were both silent, her because she was tired, me because I didn't really have anything to say. I led her into the dining room and we all sat down, Emily next to Tank, across from me and Stephanie, and Lester and Bobby at either end.

We ate in silence for a bit and then Lester spoke up. Clearly, he had decided to go along with his plan despite the fact that it was idiotic. "Can I have the salt please? Ranger, you're looking very handsome tonight."

We all stilled. Stephanie looked confused, and the rest of us glared at Lester while Emily handed him the salt. By the third comment (the other two were 'Pepper please. Isn't it fantastic that Ranger is financially solvent so that if he ever gets married, his spouse won't need to worry about anything?' and, as he got up to get himself a glass of water, "Anyone else want water? I'm sure Ranger does, seeing as how he's obviously very hot.') Stephanie was looking at Lester like he was insane and the rest of us had discovered that Lester was about as subtle as a flying brick. As we cleared the table, Lester looked over at Emily and gave her a wink. Emily responded by giving him a 'stop being idiotic' look.

Lester gave a sigh and threw his hands up in the air in defeat. Then he walked out of the room, but not before muttering, "Hopeless. The whole thing is hopeless."

If he kept trying to help, it definitely would be.