One of the most unfortunate aspects of change was the way in which it tended to drastically rearrange your life. Change takes well managed routines and throws them into chaos. One may try to anticipate the inconveniences wrought by change by establishing new routines in order to ease oneself into the unfamiliar. Over time, this works. What was unfamiliar and strange soon becomes familiar, until one cannot remember what life was like before. This all comes with the acceptance of change, but oftentimes such acceptance is not easy in coming. Sooner or later the strangeness of the situation becomes evident, one either rolls with it or struggles against it. Either way, you come to know how utterly bewildering change can be and are left knowing with utmost certainty that nothing will ever be the same again.
This realization had yet to hit Aeris. She had firmly struggled to accept the fact that her life had been turned upside down, and that this topsy-turvy ride wasn't about to stop. It was only just beginning. She had, in fact, been in avoidance of the plain truth of her situation, going through the days as if nothing at all was the matter. To the casual observer, Aeris was not a girl on the verge of getting married to a perfect stranger. She wasn't about to give up the anonymity of simple village life for the whirlwind of fame attached to true nobility. Nor was she a girl about to leave her family home to live in a strange city.
Yes, to the casual observer, Aeris was your typical well-to-do village girl without a care in the world. She had tried her hardest to portray this image by not thinking on her decision she'd made well over a fortnight ago. A feat that was becoming overwhelmingly harder to do as the days passed. The entire house was in a flurry of activity as her all of her belongings she didn't immediately need were carefully packed and addressed. With each sunrise and subsequent sunset, she was closer to her eventual departure. A departure she was not looking forward to.
Over the last two weeks she had seen much more of Mr. Shinra than she'd like and it was only out of courtesy that she didn't say anything. He had done her family quite a large favor and she should be grateful, though at times it was hard. The man was as unpleasantly condescending as he was before, if not more so. He took it upon himself to guide her as if she were a lost chick and he was the mother hen, gently nudging her in the right direction. Never in her whole life had she held her tongue. This was her first real experience with it and she found it to be quite tiresome. There were times when she'd almost slip, only to be silenced by a dark look given to her by her mother.
The only good thing about this whole ordeal was that she finally had an ally in her mother. Elmyra had begrudgingly kept a silent reign on her daughter's mouth, but in private, she expressed her deep dislike for Mr. Shinra.
"He is making himself far too familiar in our home. Ordering everyone around as if it were his own. I just know he plans to move in here and make that awful wife of his the lady of this house. I can see it..." She stated, a bit hysterically, waving her handkerchief for emphasis, "I can see it quite plainly...in those beady little eyes of his. He's just slavering, Aeris. Just waiting with baited breath to take what's ours and throw us out on the street. I shouldn't have dreamed to hope...all those pretty words of his were just words. What a fool I was! Oh! What shall become of us?"
Then her mother let out a cry and collapsed back into her chair in a mock-faint. Aeris rolled her eyes at her mother's antics and sighed. It had taken twenty full minutes to calm her poor mother down. After that, she had made a habit of talking to her mother during the evening hours. It helped reduce the bouts of hysteria her mother was so prone to, and it did a great deal to calm her nerves as well. Her mother might be a bit overwrought and dramatic in her gestures, but she was a rather kindly listener, and Aeris had unexpectedly come to depend on her as a source of comfort. Something she had longed for her whole life.
They discussed her future and her mother told her as much as she could remember about court life, when not sighing overdramatically about what Mr. Shinra would do when he inevitably took over her home. And for once, her mother's discussion of manners and coquetry wasn't quite as tiresome as before. They often spoke of Mr. Shinra and his irredeemably ridiculous quirks. Though she wasn't in agreement with her mother's hysterical paranoia, she didn't much care for Mr. Shinra's overbearing attitude. Yet she put up with it as amiably as she could, which made her mother giddy with obvious pleasure. Finally, her daughter had caught on to the lessons she'd tried to instill in her all these years.
It was a pity it had all come so late.
Aeris held back this realization, for she didn't want to think about the day she would leave all of this. She didn't want to think of the final embrace she'd have to give her mother, knowing that she'd never see her again. The only palpable good Mr. Shinra HAD done was see to it that she would at least be able to have some contact with her mother. She was allowed to write to her mother and receive one letter from her mother in kind, as long as it was kept discreetly secret. One letter to. One letter from. Soon those bi-monthly letters would be the only contact she would have from her dear mother. She quite regretted all the years she spent fighting Elmyra over every little thing. Now she had wished she'd stopped just for a moment to listen and appreciate all the things she could have learned.
All she had was the time given, so Aeris had did her best not to think too hard and to enjoy the time she had. So, Mother and Daughter quietly conspired every evening about nothing in particular while Mr. Shinra plotted and planned her future. With him, he'd brought an entire army of tutors to begin the basics of her "training" in royal etiquette. He'd also taken care to bring a seamstress who fitted her for her new wardrobe. Her days seemed to fly by. She rarely had a minute to herself, except for the evening hours.
During the day, she was entirely occupied by the various tutors hired. There was one tutor for meals, to teach her which fork should be used, when she ought to sit down. What she should talk about during meals and so forth. There was another for dances. Yet another for letter writing. And so on and so on, and so forth. At the end of the day she was deliriously exhausted. It was as if a fire was lighted underneath each and every one of her tutor's seats. They taught her like the devil himself was looking over their shoulder and it had confused Aeris. Mr. Shinra had told her she'd have a full month to prepare...but apparently he overestimated the time by quite a bit.
When she finally had the gumption to ask him outright, she was told that plans had changed. Mr. Shinra had told her this with such an offhand flippancy that it still caused her quite a bit of aggravation when she thought about it. She was no longer to spend a month cloistered in the Imperial City. Instead, she would have but two weeks to learn all she had to before being shuttled to Midgar. Once there, she would spend two and a half weeks in the city. The first week would be to get used to her temporary home. The second week, she was to gradually be introduced into polite society. Also during this week, she would have daily meetings with the men who were her chosen suitors, handpicked by the Queen herself.
At the end of the two and a half weeks, there would be a ball to celebrate her coming out into society. It was to be a grand affair, if she was to believe Mr. Shinra, where she would be presented to all high nobility, as well as the Queen herself. After all the formalities, the ball would start, and she would dance with each of her suitors. Mr. Shinra had said that the Queen would be watching during this time, to see which of the young men she'd chosen suited her best.
The next day, she'd be taken to St. Adlebert's Cathedral where the Queen would formally bestow her with the title of Grand Duchess of all Seneca...which was another point Mr. Shinra failed to mention. He'd said that she was to be the Grand Duchess of Nibelheim, which was a province of Seneca and its capital city. He'd said nothing about being the Grand Duchess of all Seneca. She pointed this out to him, berating him for failing to mention this rather large detail in his initial offer. He waved her off, explaining that he wasn't entirely familiar with the ins and outs of Senecian nobility; therefore he'd gotten his facts confused. This didn't instill much confidence in Aeris and she'd spent the next forty five minutes sharply interrogating him to her satisfaction.
Though he'd answered most of her question in great detail, he never explained to her why everything seemed so rushed. Aeris was a rarity amongst modern young ladies. She was prone to following current events quite closely, and could often be found with the latest edition of the Midgar Times in her hands. It was no secret to anyone who was even just a bit informed that war was brewing. The Empire had increased vastly over the years and had because of this, it had prospered. To conquer so easily, and with such benefit, would inevitably garner envy amongst less prosperous nations. Wutai was one of these nations, though they could hardly be called less prosperous. Nevertheless, they disliked the Empire's growing influence and cast a wary eye at its Eastern neighbors. Tension between the two nations was high, and most were expecting war to break out any day now.
This was the only reason she could fathom that the Queen would rush her marriage so. Either way, there was quite a bit more to the arrangement than she'd previously believed and she could only wish that things would slow down a bit, for her sanity's sake. All her wishing got her less than nowhere and so her vicious spate of not thinking had begun.
Matters were made worse by the arrival of Mrs. Shinra, her dear and all together distant cousin. Her visit had coincided with Aeris's appointment with the seamstress. Aeris had vague recollections of the first and only time she had met Mrs. Delores Shinra. It was long before she was married, if she remembered correctly, when she was but nine years old, and Delores a rather fulsome fourteen. Her cousin had doted on her, to the point of annoyance. Treating her more like a common house pet or a favored china doll than a person. To say it hadn't been a fond meeting was an understatement.
Upon re-acquaintance, Aeris could safely say that her first impressions of her cousin were in no danger of changing. Mrs. Delores Shinra was a perfect compliment to her husband in the most negative connotation possible. She was every bit as unctuous and overbearing as Mr. Shinra. In fact, Aeris quite believed that she was in many ways worse than her husband, for she was not only overtly patronizing but haughty and arrogant as well. At the very least, Mr. Shinra had the decency to treat them as near equals or superiors. It seemed sometimes that Mr. Shinra was desperately trying to gain her good confidence for future use. Whereas, Mrs. Shinra was quite the opposite, treating them with a most impatient disdain, as if they were tasking her by their mere presence.
Aeris fumed silently, waiting for the day that she would leave with cold jubilation. Her mother wasn't quite so silent in her dislike for Mrs. Shinra, and had told her as much straight to her face, which made her an unwelcome interloper during her daughter's fittings and something Aeris greatly lamented. She would have liked her mother's input on her wardrobe, but it was not to be.
Mrs. Shinra had stayed a full week to oversee the seamstress, much to almost everyone's dismay. Not only were Aeris and her mother firmly against her, but the entire staff of Pembroke disliked the lady with the kind of fervor rarely seen in the relatively happy household. The maids had taken to hiding her hatpins in petty revenge for her frequent insults. Even Pembroke's easygoing chef, Rueben, had his ins and outs with her. Aeris had noted that every night during dinner, she found something drastically wrong with her meal, while everyone else had few complaints. Her meat was always overcooked or under-seasoned. Her potatoes were lumpy and her Merlot flat.
Because of this, Aeris had found it easier to her hold her tongue as she was too busy secretly smiling at her cousin's discomfort. It was the only form of retribution she had, anyway...and she needed something. If Mrs. Shinra's manners regarding the help had been the only thing that got on her nerves, it would have been enough to drive her to distraction.
Mrs. Shinra had first and last vote over every decision regarding her wardrobe. She chose the colors, the style, the fabric and the accessories with nary a word to Aeris, rarely even asking her opinion. Aeris had tried to get a word in, to no avail. Mrs. Shinra would have none of it, waving her words away with the brisk flick of her hand. She would decide what was appropriate for a young lady of royal bearing, as, in her opinion, the girl herself could hardly be trusted with the job. So, Mrs. Shinra had spent an entire week in a never-ending, one-sided conversation with the seamstress, talking to her as if there wasn't a third person in the room. When she wasn't talking to hear her own voice, she ordered the poor little seamstress around like a dog, barking orders at her as if she were deaf, dumb and blind, all while completely ignoring Aeris.
If her attention was gained, it was only to gaze at Aeris appraisingly as if she were the finest thoroughbred chocobo. Then she'd quickly jot something down in a little notebook she kept clipped to a hidden pocket in her dress, mumbling quietly to herself. It had bothered her quite a bit, enough for her to give Mrs. Shinra a raised eyebrow that screamed disapproval. Her cousin had apparently taken note, as she hadn't whipped her notebook out quite so often after that. If nothing else, she could compliment Mrs. Shinra for her acute observance of the obvious and that was the by far the best and only real compliment she could give her.
For Mrs. Shinra's part, she had only made one passing comment to Aeris's clear discomfiture with her treatment thus far.
"My dear Aeris, you will see once you are apart of high society that it behooves a lady to never give undo attention to those beneath you. You must always keep an adequate sense of distance in your manner so as to not give anyone under your care the wrong impression. If you are too friendly, those lower in position will covet your time and your money." She had said, her dull, blue eyes narrowing as if she were relating great confidences, "Remember, you must be prudent in all associations, for once you ascend...all manner of rats and other undesirables will come out of the woodwork, with their hands open and begging. I only act this way to teach you, so that you may avoid unpleasant circumstance."
Aeris had never been more disgusted in her life at the pure drivel that spewed from her mouth. It was the most awful thing she'd ever heard another human being utter. She quite understood the value of choosing the right friends, but she couldn't disagree more when it came to her attitude on those less fortunate. They did not deserve to be abused. Surely, there were those who thought to take advantage of your kindness, but you couldn't just refuse all care to those around you. After all, Aeris believed whole heartedly in the basic goodness of all people.
There was almost an audible sigh of relief on the day Mrs. Shinra made her leave. The days that crawled by before, began to whisk a bit more briskly. Before she even knew it, the very day for her own departure drew near. This very morning she'd woken to the sound of chirping birds and the simple thought that this was the last time she'd hear those birds sing in front of her window. That the next time she looked at the sky, it would be over a different town.
Logically, she knew that the sky would remain the same; the only thing that changed was her location. Yet she could not help but think that'd it would be more than that. She wondered then if she would truly be the same. Perhaps, she, like the sky would change not only location but in a more profound way, maybe she too would shift from day to night seamlessly. The real question was would she ever stop or would she just keep changing, until it wasn't just location that separated her from what she was before.
She was in dawn now, soon to be afternoon. Beyond noontime lay somber twilight, where she would linger until finally she became the night and then night would bleed away, and perhaps, just perhaps she'd be dawn once more.
Yes, she would see the same sky again and even if her location changed, she'd still be herself underneath it all. As long as she didn't lose faith, she would be all right. The sky, no matter where it was, would always be the sky and so it would be with Aeris.
Her gaze had been directed to the window, and the soft rose-hued light that quietly crept through the semi-transparent silk shades. She'd forgotten to draw her curtains properly, a habit she carried over from when she was a child. There was something magical about waking to the first rays of the sun. Smilingly lightly but tiredly, she had reluctantly gotten up. Her maid, Mariah, appeared soon after and had assisted her in getting dressed for the morning. She'd worn a light, silk morning dress, with no corset as she wasn't yet prepared to leave her room.
Mr. Shinra would not arrive until later in the afternoon, and she had some last minute packing to do. Mariah helped her as much as she could, though she could tell the maid was getting a bit antsy. She was taking far too much time to pack something as simple as handkerchiefs, yet she couldn't help it. Her fingers unconsciously smoothed the fabric of one kerchief in particular. The first she'd ever been given. It was a lovely little kerchief in a plain but bright pink, with small cluster of knotted roses embroidered smartly on its lower right edge. Her father had given it to her for her twelfth birthday. With another small smile, she carefully folded the kerchief and placed it in her trunk. Sighing, she looked over her morning's work, startled to find that it seemed so full...yet pathetically empty.
She looked over her room. It too was sadly empty of anything that marked its owner. All the personal portraits and pictures had been stripped and packed away, sent to their new home. Her personal library had also been carefully stowed away. Placed in an overlarge crate and forwarded to her temporary apartment in Midgar. Most likely, she wouldn't even have them take it out of storage, as she wasn't going to be staying in Midgar for long. Perhaps, she'd have them dig out some of her favorite volumes, though.
Shutting the trunk with a soft, yet audible click, it finally dawned on Aeris. This was it. She was really leaving.
It was a daunting thought. Her entire life, her future lay before her and it was so very uncertain. Would she be happy? What kind of man would she be marrying and would she be able to find it in her heart to love him? How could one marry a stranger and expect love, was it naive to think this way? Naive to hope that somehow, some way, she'd find love in the arms of a man she barely knew. Her heart was deeply torn, and somewhere in the pit of her stomach, she felt a knot of worry form. She hated to think it, but she was terrified that this would be nothing more than a marriage of convenience. Would it be a loveless marriage, where she would be nothing more than a vessel to produce an heir as well as free labor to manage his household?
Gods, she didn't want that at all. Her mother had run from it and now, she would have to pay the heavy price. She tried to form strings of bitterness in her heart, but she just couldn't. Her newfound closeness with her mother had softened her heart. Elmyra had followed her heart those many years ago. She married for love and lived as happily as anyone could. There was no way for her to know what the future held and Aeris found she couldn't blame her. If she'd been in her mother's position, she probably would have done the same. As it was, Aeris had followed her heart in this matter and would not allow anyone else to shoulder the burden of that decision.
Her mother had told her a little about her own life as a royal. She'd painted a rather romantic picture, but the words behind the dream struck truer. Yes, there would be many gala balls, which she would attend wearing a glittering dress, completely dripping in jewels on the arm of her husband to be. It sounded wonderfully glamorous, yet there was something not so hidden in her mother's eyes as she spoke. There was glamour, but there was also cold duty and the strict codes of conduct one had to obey at all times. It was a life filled with excessive obligation and little time for real love. The only offset to this was the money and privilege her title would grant.
She would have so much money that she couldn't begin to think what she'd do with it. There would be no limits, nothing was beyond her reach. She would never have to want for anything, because with a snap of fingers, it could be hers if she so wished it. Yet the idea of this didn't remotely please her. It barely interested her at all, if the truth were to be told.
Perhaps for some, the lure of so much money and power would be something worth killing for. In Aeris's opinion, a life like that seemed awfully empty without love. This was why she had briefly hoped that she would have some say in the choice of her future husband. Even if they didn't know each another well, she would have liked to pick someone she had something in common with, rather than a complete stranger. As Mr. Shinra had explained it, she would spend some time with her suitors but this was a perfunctory gesture at best. It would give her some idea of the quality of the man she may be marrying, but there was no guarantee that the one she liked best would be picked. Mr. Shinra had said that the Queen would likely pick her husband based on political gain, rather than how well she got on with him.
Her heart sunk with the realization that most of the young men she would be meeting wouldn't care much for her as a person. They were only there to marry her for her title, nothing more. It was hard, but slowly, she felt herself giving up on love. She could almost cry, if she allowed herself to, but she wouldn't. This would not break her. She wouldn't let this situation be the ruination of her heart and soul. She would find a way to be happy, no matter what.
Yet she would become what she hated most. A trophy, a bauble for her husband-to-be to hang on his arm, showing her off like the jewel she was, only to put her away once he no longer needed her. A part of her railed against this and cried to be let out to deny the tightening shackles around her heart but she held it all in. There would be no point in lamenting now, this decision was made for the greater good. It had saved her home and her mother. They were safe and secure now, if nothing else could bring her happiness, then that would have to suffice.
The gravity of her decision overwhelmed her as her maid helped her dress. She gazed about the room one more, letting it all sink in. She would never see this room again. She would never see her mother again or any of the people she'd known since childhood. Her maid, Mariah, she'd never see her again. She'd grown up with the girl, they were as closer than most mistresses and servants ever got. She was more a friend than just a maid and now...she'd never see her again. She'd never be able to traipse about the forest, wild and free, as she had before. She'd never be able to go down to the bookshop to grab a copy of the latest one-gil Dover romance novel that she was so fond of. Names and faces of people she'd never see again flashed before her eyes, and suddenly, she found herself crying. Her fingers tightened against the bedpost as she braced herself, letting out an audible gasp just as her maid tightened the laces on her corset.
"Are you all right, Miss?" Mariah asked, quiet concern entering her lilting voice. "Is it too tight?"
Aeris smiled sadly, wiping away her tears. She'd always loved the way her maid spoke. Mariah had a slight country accent, which was considered coarse in upper crust circles, but Aeris had always thought it charming and somewhat pleasing in tone. When her mother wasn't around, sometimes Aeris found herself slipping into it, having spent so much time with the servants, it was only natural. Over the years, she'd been trained out of it, so that she spoke like a proper lady but she still held onto that part of her childhood, though no one would ever know of it.
With a shaky sigh, she answered her maid, "No, I'm fine, Mariah. I was only thinking about how much I shall miss this place and everyone here."
Mariah continued to tie the laces on the corset, speaking as she worked, "Well, if it's any comfort, I'll miss you terrible. All of us here will. You're a good and kind lady...And once you're gone, there'll be no one to deal with the Missus when she works herself into a state. I daresay the next few months will be filled with quite a bit more excitement than any of us will likely want."
Aeris laughed lightly as she leaned more heavily on the bedpost, "Indeed. My mother is never short on the dramatics but I think you should all fair well. I have instructed Mr. Shinra to keep an eye on her..."
Mariah frowned as her small fingers deftly wove and tightened the corset's laces, moving slowly down her charge's back, "Well, Miss Aeris, I don't know if that's such a good idea, if you don't mind my saying. Considering your mother's feelings regarding Mr. Shinra, I don't think she'll be too pleased to see him..."
"I suppose not." Aeris said, wincing a bit as Mariah pulled the laces tight. Once her breath came back, she spoke again, "Mother has always made more of things than she should but I think, eventually, she will come 'round. After all, he will be the only contact we have with each other once I leave."
"Such a sad situation...for the life of me, Miss, I don't think I'll ever understand rich folks. P'rhaps it's better that way...anyway, better Mr. Shinra than that awful wife of his. I don't mean to be a gossip, Miss Aeris, but I hope I never cross paths with that lot again. I pity the poor, unfortunate souls under her service. It must be terrible torment to work for her. Me mum said just yesterday that she thought the devil was in that woman...and I said..."
Aeris closed her eyes as she let her maid ramble on. She'd only just begun to wear the tight laced health corsets all ladies were expected to wear. Until now, she'd worn the less restrictive corsets designed for young girls. She'd specifically directed Mariah not to tie it quite as tight as she should have because Aeris was used to having a measure of freedom. The maid had tied it as loosely as she dared to; even still it was terribly uncomfortable and drove the breath from her lungs. She didn't know how she'd put up with it at all. Her thoughts were scattered by the sounds of commotion coming from the hallway. As the din neared her door, the cacophonous voice of her mother reached her ears.
"AERIS! Good heavens, girl! There you are!" Her mother cried, bustling towards her daughter, handkerchief flapping.
Aeris merely stared at her mother in open surprise, answering her between gasps as her corset was pulled just a bit tighter, "W-where...else...would I be?"
"Well, I thought you'd be down for breakfast already! You were always such an early riser...and when you weren't there..." She said, with the slightest tremble to her voice as she collapsed into a chair, fanning her kerchief in front of her face to stave off the vapors she was sure to succumb to.
"I had a few more things to pack, which Mariah has kindly helped me with. I was just about to..."
Her mother interrupted her, holding a hand to her heart as she spoke, "Well, you gave me quite a fright! I thought that Mr. Shinra might have come early and spirited you away before I might properly say my goodbyes... and then..." Her mother's faced brightened momentarily before she paused, noting her daughter's state of dress, or undress as it were, "You're not dressed, my dear."
"No, I'm not. I was just about to explain..."
"Mr. Shinra might be here at any moment! Look at the state you're in! OH! Gracious! You shall be the death of me, I swear!" She exclaimed, slapping her hand on the armrest of her chair in burdened disapproval, "Oh. So much the better I suppose."
Her mother got up with feigned weariness, waving her confusion away with one delicate hand. Aeris didn't care to ask her mother what in the world she was talking about as it was rather futile. The answer would no doubt be quite disappointing and unhelpful. She suspected that most of the time her mother barely knew what she was talking about anyway. The woman in question was currently babbling to no one in particular. Aeris ventured to guess that her mother might be talking to her, perhaps even asking her questions but one could never be sure.
From what little she caught, Aeris had decided that her mother was merely carrying on as she normally did and therefore she ignored her as best she could. Using the hard won control over her tongue, Aeris exercised her new gift by not making any smart remarks at her mother's expense. Instead, she merely nodded her assent to whatever crazy notions her mother was currently spouting. It was clear a dramatic outburst was forthcoming as Mrs. Gast was becoming increasingly agitated. Aeris did her best to brace herself for the inevitable storm.
"CLARA! CLARA, YOU LAZY GIRL! WHERE ARE YOU?" her mother bellowed, without any preamble or explanation for why she felt the sudden need to shout.
Aeris winced from not only the volume of her mother's voice but from the abruptly final tug her maid gave to her corset before tying the knot to hold it in place. All the while, her mother continued to shout, complain and generally make a fuss at her maid's absence. The din quieted once the maid came in, huffing and puffing as she trudged in holding several more packages in her arms than she could comfortably carry. Her mother excitedly ushered her in, nearly toppling both maid and packages in the process. Mariah kindly saved the day by helping poor Clara, taking the topmost packages and setting them on her mistress's bed. Aeris watched with some curiosity as she slipped on a robe for modesty's sake.
"Mother...what is all this?" Aeris asked carefully, holding her robe closed at the neck.
Her mother, for once, said nothing. She gave her daughter a mysterious little smile, her eyes glittering with mirth. Aeris was unsure if she ought to be delighted by this or worried. Her mother was rarely the type of person who was spontaneously mischievous. That had been her father's department. Publicly, her mother was always ridiculously demure in her comportment and ever so proper. For the briefest moment, Aeris wondered if her mother had finally lost her tentative hold on reality, letting the last few scraps of sanity she had wither and die as she drove homeward, towards senility.
She knew it would happen one day...only a matter of time, really.
Her mother hadn't guessed what her daughter had been pondering. She'd merely been excited, not only because she had a great surprise in store for her daughter, but also because the girl seemed so openly curious. A rare reaction indeed when in her presence. Her daughter's curiosity had been her husband's sole province for the longest time. It was an exciting experience to have her daughter's full and undivided attention.
With a flourish, Mrs. Gast opened the largest of the packages, dramatically throwing the box top to the floor. She pushed backed the protective tissue, and gestured for her daughter to come closer. The contents revealed, Aeris's eyes widened minutely as she glided over to examine what lay beneath the tissue. Her hand reached out slowly, her fingers brushing against the thick, unmistakable feel of real velvet. She drew the fabric out, marveling at the feel. It was a dress. A brand new dress from a department store and not just any store, it was from Paquin Milne of Midgar.
Paquin Milne was well known, as it was a division of ShinRa Incorporated, which of course belonged to Mr. Shinra. It offered a variety of goods but its most famous were its line of designer dresses. This particular dress she'd seen in the most recent issue of the Midgar Lady's Journal. The dress was from Poiret's fall collection, a tailor made traveling ensemble complete with bolero jacket and hat, all in pleasing light blues. Secretly, she had always dreamed of wearing such a frock, but she'd always been considered too young. Her mother had forced her to wear the shorter, ankle length dresses common for young girls. And even as well off as her family had been, a designer dress such as this was beyond their means. Clearly, now she was believed to be a lady, and therefore deserving of attire befitting not only her change of station, but her coming of age as well.
The room went silent with anticipation as Aeris drew her dress from the box. This quietude didn't last long. Her mother broke the silence promptly as she shrilly ordered the maids to help Aeris dress, snapping her kerchief in the air like a slave master's whip. Instantly, both Clara and Mariah went to work. They fussed over their charge with more than the usual amount of care, checking and rechecking every button, tie and fastening. Mrs. Gast supervised in her most unhelpful way, prattling on ceaselessly while she tried to instruct the maids, instruction that was, as usual, not appreciated, merely tolerated or outright ignored. Not that Mrs. Gast could tell. She was much too busy talking to care that no one paid attention to anything she said.
She was still talking when the maids finished. Too immersed in the sound of her own voice, she hadn't really noticed that the room had gone absurdly quiet. Clara and Mariah had stepped away to examine their work, and they gasped, staring in awe at their young charge. Aeris had always been considered a beauty, but never one of surpassing stature. She was a country girl through and through, full of the bright beauty and open bounty of the fields and forests.
Yet in these clothes, she looked like a real lady. So much so, that both Clara and Mariah had difficulty seeing the young tomboy they knew in the woman in front of them. Aeris felt self conscious under their gaze and turned to face her mother, who was still chattering on and on to an audience that didn't mark her. As she turned to address her daughter, her mouth dropped and any words that might have come forth at that moment caught in her throat. She lifted a trembling hand to her mouth as she stifled a cry, and tears came to her eyes.
Aeris was too afraid to voice the question on her lips, assuming she looked ridiculous. Her mother glided forward and took her daughter's hands in her own. With an obvious glowing of pride in her features, she smiled and held out her daughter's arms to get a better look at her. Touching the young lady's face, the tears that welled up fell.
She gave Aeris another watery smile, speaking with a voice strained by tears of pleasure, "Oh...how much you've grown. I've not noticed it till now. Before my very eyes my little girl has become a lady..."
Aeris looked at her with a baffled expression that defied reason itself. What reason in the world did she have to be confused? With a feigned sigh of exasperation, Mrs. Gast turned her daughter so that she could look at herself in the mirror. Aeris was greeted by a stranger.
The girl in the mirror blinked, her hand lifting up to touch the hair that could not possibly be hers. Indeed, it was hers, yet it wasn't. They'd curled it up and twisted it into several buns that were smartly pinned and layered over each other so that not even a wisp of hair was loose, with the exception of her bangs. It was strange; she was so used to having it in a long braid that she felt oddly naked without its weight thumping against her back.
"How peculiar," she thought to herself, tilting her head as if it helped her comprehend the image the mirror reflected.
She didn't have a long time to contemplate this change, Miles, an elderly butler and their oldest servant, entered to inform them that Mr. Shinra's carriage had arrived. Her mother reacted to this new with her typical bluster, shouting and waving at the servants with the kind of overdramatic pomposity that'd put the greatest divas in the opera to shame. The room was soon set into a wild whirlwind of activity. Servants bustled in and out busily as they took luggage out to the carriage, which necessitated multiple trips. They moved so fast, Aeris could hardly tell who was coming and who was going. Even if she hadn't been tipped off by unsteady luggage in their hands, she wouldn't have much noticed. She was still transfixed by the girl in the mirror. The girl that was and wasn't her.
It was certainly her reflection, she was sure, yet it felt strange. Like she was looking at the wrong side of the glass somehow, reaching out, her hand met the mirror and she knew without a doubt what was reflected was real. It was really her. This was really happening. The words formed in her mind just as she touched the soft fabric of her dress, another reminder of her new reality. Her eyes widened in horror and shock as it all finally hit her. She was so absorbed in her own thoughts that she hadn't heard her mother calling her name repeatedly. Nothing registered until the older woman tugged sharply on her sleeve. Aeris spun around, wide eyed, and stared unseeingly at her mother.
"AERIS!" Her mother said sharply, her words trailing off as she took in her daughter's appearance. That the girl was distraught was no mystery, even as dense as Mrs. Gast could be sometimes, she could see this plainly. Concerned now, she spoke the girl's name more softly, "Aeris, Mr. Shinra is here..." She paused, before remarking gently, "Gracious, you've gone pale! Dear heart, are you quite all right?"
"No..." Aeris whispered as she shook her head, her voice slightly trembling.
For once in her life, Elmyra managed NOT to make a scene and took another's feelings into account. The girl had finally accepted what was happening to her and she was terrified. Elmyra understood all too well. She had reacted the same way when her father had announced to her at the tender age of sixteen that she'd be marrying some strange boy from across the sea. He'd arranged an alliance with Wutai through her, and she still remembered the cold trepidation that she felt as her wedding day approached. It had seemed so much like a death sentence. Aeris was feeling these same things, and Elmyra's heart went out to her. How could she not? She'd managed to escape her situation, but Aeris...Aeris could not and all because...Mrs. Gast refused to think on it a minute more. Her bad decisions were of the past. Now, it was her daughter that mattered and her daughter needed her, at long last.
She set a small hand on Aeris's shoulder and gave her a wistful smile. For a moment, just a moment, she wished that she could take this burden from her daughter but it was not to be. This was fate's hand and they had to take the cards as dealt. The younger girl turned to face her with tears in her eyes, held at bay but just barely.
"Momma...I'm scared."
Mrs. Gast's smile became more brittle as she took her daughter's hands in her own, squeezing them a bit as she gather the courage to speak. It was so hard. Aeris had called her 'Momma". The girl had never called her such a name. It had always been a secret desire of her heart to hear her daughter call her by that name. As former royalty, she was used to the formality of her position. She'd never really called her own mother anything but "Her Ladyship, My Mother". When she met and married Emmett, she had been so excited to hear "Momma" from the lips of her child. So eager to feel and live like a common person. Yet when the time came, her daughter never called her such. Aeris had no trouble coming up with the most absurd pet names and diminutives for her father but none for her mother. Ever since the girl was ten, she'd referred to Elmyra as either Mrs. Gast or Mother. She was so damned formal and it had firmly irked Elmyra to no end. But now, NOW the girl called her momma, just as she'd always wanted. It warmed and broke her heart in the same instant and Elmyra realized then just how much she'd miss her dear daughter.
She'd miss the girl, more than she'd ever know.
Words caught in her mouth as she looked at her daughter's wide, green eyes that were glassy with tears. Letting out a softly choked sigh, she gathered her daughter into her arms and embraced her tightly. Hesitantly, Aeris returned the gesture. They stood there for several minutes, holding each other tight while crying quietly, knowing this was their last moment together. Truly together as mother and daughter should be. Gentle words were giving and calming comfort, her mother pulled away sharply then, gazing at her daughter with suddenly stern eyes. She still clasped her daughter's hands tightly. Shaking them, she looked into Aeris's eyes deeply before she spoke with a finality that defied argument.
"You, my dear, have nothing in the world to fear, you hear me? You are my Wild Rose. Nothing can tame you. Nothing. You are a fine, strong girl, so much braver than I could have ever been or ever will be. You have faced head on what I ran away from and I am proud to call you daughter."
Aeris inhaled sharply, tears falling down her cheeks in soft waves.
"Momma..." She whispered, tipping her head down and squeezing her mother's hands, "I don't want to go. I don't want to leave you..."
Mrs. Gast had hoped to have a farewell free of tears and sorrow, but it, like many things, was not to be. She cupped her daughter's cheek, giving her a warm, but bittersweet smile, "My sweet, wild rose...I don't want you to leave either. I shall miss you dearly but such is the way of the world. Daughters grow up and leave their mothers, it is inevitable. Now, no more tears. We both must be brave now and soldier on. Wallowing in sorrow will get us nowhere."
She wiped away her daughter's tears, embracing her for what seemed like the final time. After a bit, both ladies composed themselves and strode out to meet Mr. Shinra's carriage. Both were rather shocked to come upon Mrs. Shinra in their pleasant foyer, rather than Mr. Shinra. There was a shared look of surprise on mother and daughter's face as they separately contemplated the meaning of this.
It was related to them, rather brusquely, that Mr. Shinra had business to attend to and could not come, sending his wife in his stead. This new development was received as well as it could be. The only spot of good news was that Mrs. Shinra had brought an escort with her, as a married lady of her public stature was not allowed to travel alone, for safety's sake. The young man that traveled with Mrs. Shinra was an old associate of Mr. Shinra's and a soldier. He was about the same age as Aeris herself, though perhaps a year or two older, and very handsome. In fact, Aeris could say that he was perhaps the handsomest man she'd ever seen.
"Lieutenant General Zachary Brannigan, at your service, Milady." He said smoothly, his bright blue eyes twinkling as he kissed her hand and bowed.
Aeris flushed at the dark haired soldier's actions almost immediately. She'd never been treated with such gentility before, by a young man anyway. Most of them were rude and forward, fawning over her with the expectation that she'd enjoy the attention. Mr. Brannigan was quite the opposite. He was polite, sophisticated but rough enough around the edges for a soldier and she liked him almost immediately. He had apparently registered this fact, flirting with her in such a way that she felt comfortable, yet flustered. She found herself, for the first time in her life, at a loss for words in the presence of a young man.
After the introductions were made, her mother invited them all into the sitting room for tea and quiet conversation. The carriage had to be loaded and it would be quite a wait before it'd be ready. Twenty to thirty minutes were spent amiably in the sitting room. The young Lieutenant General was a breath of fresh air and even managed to make Mrs. Shinra's presence bearable. Soon, they were called to board the carriage. Mr. Brannigan and Mrs. Shinra went ahead, allowing Mrs. Gast and her daughter a moment to themselves, so that they could say their goodbyes privately. A move that greatly surprised Aeris.
Her last moments in her home would be engraved into her memory. It was a rather tearful but oddly uplifting event. Her mother had arranged for the whole staff to come out and bid her farewell. It was an unusual move, but an important one.
The entire staff of Pembroke was quite fond of the Young Miss, as they often referred to her. Many of the long time staff had lived in houses with children who were spoiled rotten by their parents, so much so that the children had a sense of entitlement, acting as if the whole world owed them a debt. They, like their parents, believe the sun and moon revolved around them, and that everything should stop if they willed it. But not Miss Aeris. She was a sweet and even tempered lady, who treated each and every one of them like regular people, not just servants. It was rare to find a member of the upper class willing to treat their servants well and with such respect as Miss Aeris did.
Everyone from the lowest cook to Miles, the head butler, had chipped in to buy their young mistress a going away present. It was a way for them to show their appreciation to her for all the kindness she'd shown to them over the years. With as great a ceremony as possible, Clara and Mariah presented to her their gifts, humbly wrapped in plain, red paper. Aeris opened them slowly and cried for joy.
They'd bought her a brand new copy of "Songs of Silence". It was a remarkable volume, written by Sir William Blake, a popular poet and artist. She'd read her last copy so much that it had fallen apart and she hadn't the time to replace it before she left. Holding it to her breast, she tearfully thanked all of them before opening the last package. Inside, she found a several sheaves of sheet music for the piano. Mariah was quite proud of that one. She'd gone to the store herself and requested the young clerk at the counter to get her the most difficult classical selections he could find. Miss Aeris had often complained that all the sheet music she had was too easy and from artists that were far too contemporary for her tastes. With a grin, Mariah realized she had succeeded as her mistress beamed as she paged through them.
To their ears, Miss Aeris was a superlative musician and they'd greatly miss the soft sound of their mistress playing a lilting sonata or a lively concerto as it echoed down the halls while they worked. Their gift was not for their mistress alone, but for her new servants as well. None wanted to imagine a world without her music in it and even if they'd never hear it again, they all could be comforted with the thought that someone, somewhere was.
Slowly, each servant stepped forward and received a single hug and kiss goodbye. So rare was such an event, that not a single person walked away from it with dry eyes. The servants then receded into the background to allow Mother and Daughter their final moments together alone.
There was solemn silence for several tense moments. Neither woman trusted themselves to say anything, their voices were too unsure and their emotions too close to the surface. Words would only mar the moment anyway, and would lead to more useless tears. At this point, no amount of tears or sorrow could change the immutable fact that Aeris was leaving, never to see her mother again.
A lump formed in Aeris's throat as she watched her mother pull away and wordlessly place a box she'd taken from her pocket into her hands. Lips trembling, she looked at the box before hesitantly opening it. She gasped as she pulled out a delicate silver chain. From the chain hung an equally delicate pendant, which was audaciously simple for something that belonged to her mother. The pendant was nothing more than a deceptively plain, yet elegant setting from which a clear jewel hung. The jewel itself need no decoration, it was beautiful enough on its own. It was clear and shaped like a perfect tear drop frozen in space and when the light hit it just right, it seemed to glow.
Aeris knew what it was almost immediately. Her face paled as she gaped at her mother. This was her mother's heirloom. The only thing her family had allowed her to keep. The White Materia.
There were many different kinds of materia that had been mined from the earth. Each kind had been categorized in terms of its usefulness. Before the advent of synthetic mako, materia had to be mined by hand. But now, it was created in a lab, as natural mako had to be conserved. Most homes were being converted to electricity nowadays, and there were always the new modes of travel to take into account. Most ocean liners and airships ran on natural mako. Yet, there was still a need for refined materia and materia could only be refined from mako.
Her uncle had come up with the solution and many had breathed a collective sigh of relief. Now hospitals wouldn't be without their curative materia and the world's military wouldn't be without their greatest weapons. Yes, there was quite a bit of materia to go around, if you were rich enough. Even synthetic materia was too costly for the average man or woman to afford. Natural materia was even more expensive as it was becoming increasingly more difficult to find. Most mako mines had been closed up or converted into mako reactors.
Even during the booming years when mako was first pulled from the earth and refined, natural materia was a rarity. And now it was coveted, because such raw materia was much more powerful than any synthetic could ever be. Despite this, materia, whether synthetic or natural, always had some kind of impurities within it. This is evidenced by the wide varieties of color exhibited by these singularly rare gems. Each piece of materia is slightly different from the next, even if their function is the same. The more impurities, the darker the color and the darker the color, the less potent the materia becomes. There were very few examples of truly pure materia. In fact, there was only one example of truly pure materia in the entire world, and she held it in the palm of her hand.
"Mother...I can't..." Aeris whispered, her voice tightened with the futile effort of holding back her tears.
Mrs. Gast didn't look at her daughter, instead, she straightened her jacket as she spoke quietly, "Yes, you can and you will."
Aeris sobbed a protest, "But..."
"I'll have none of that!"
Aeris started at the sharpness in her mother's tone. Looking into the older woman's eyes, she saw a fire there that she'd never seen before. She'd known her mother to be of royal lineage but she'd never really believed it, until now. There was an air of imperial pride in her bearing that she lacked before. She'd seemed to grow taller and more imposing in mere seconds. Aeris immediately ceased her sobbing and stared at her mother quietly. Her mother's face softened as she took the necklace from her daughter. Carefully, Mrs. Gast stood behind her and fastened the necklace, returning to face her daughter once the deed was done.
Sighing heavily, Mrs. Gast looked her daughter straight in the eye, "My mother gave this to me when I was just a bit younger than you are now. It was a great honor to wear it. My first formal ball, I had that necklace on. And the day I met your father...it's brought me good luck. It is only fair that I give it you, so it brings you good luck...so that you'll look at it and remember me." She said, throat choked with emotion, "I shall miss you so much..."
Aeris had no words at her disposal and opted instead to fiercely embrace her mother. Mother and daughter held each other, weeping harshly and uncontrollably. They would have stayed thusly had not a small cough interrupted their melancholic reverie. It was the young Lieutenant General who'd coughed, gazing at both women with abashed silence at having interrupted such an intimate moment.
"Ladies, it is time." He said quietly.
Both ladies nodded. Mrs. Gast helped her daughter compose herself, finding some deep well of reserve within her, that kept her from crying for the sake of her daughter. She smoothed Aeris's dress and tucked away the pendant she'd given her, all dry eyed. Her calm helped Aeris to feel more at ease, though no less sorrowful. Mrs. Gast's last act as her mother was to help Aeris pin her hat on. Tugging at her daughter's sleeve, she observed her and finding nothing askew, she stood back and gave her a teary smile. Aeris replied in kind, squeezing her mother's hand one last time before following the Lieutenant General out. Her mother trailed behind, watching the young girl turned woman enter the carriage that was to take her away. Aeris could feel her mother's gaze at her back and longed to turn around, but she didn't dare.
She didn't mind so much that Lieutenant General Brannigan had seen her cry, but Mrs. Shinra was an entirely different matter. The woman would no doubt think it unseemly to show such visible emotion in public. So, she kept her eyes firmly forward, fixing them ahead with as cold an expression as she could muster. She wouldn't show weakness in front of that woman. Nothing was said as she entered the carriage, and this silence continued as they pulled out of the drive. Aeris had kept her promise to herself, only faltering just a little. She did turn back to look out the back window of the carriage. Smiling mournfully, she gave a little wave to her mother's retreating form. Her mother gave a wave back and Aeris had to turn away. She closed her eyes and committed that last glimpse of her home to memory. And when she opened her eyes once more, she was greeted by solemn silence and a terse drive to a city she'd only ever visited once before, when she was very young.
Aeris watched the trees as they passed, thoughts of her uncertain future whisking past her...clattering on her heels as fast as her carriage could carry her.
To comply with the new rules, any author's notes for this and future chapters will be kept at my community writing journal--Yume Jinju at livejoural. There's a link for this community in my profile.
--Thanks, Noa