On a roll, finally. Not much to say aside from how I can't believe how many reviews I've got! This is the most any of my stories as ever received, and I can't thank you all enough. It's really want makes me keep writing, so read onwards and enjoy!

La, la, la, standard disclaimer still applies. Don't own JN, don't sue, woo. Onwards!

To Cross the Rubicon
By: pottergal

Chapter Thirteen: Of Minds and Men

Jimmy sat on a stool beside the couch in his lab, where Cindy lay, still unconscious. They'd returned over an hour ago with the two vials in hand, and upon their arrival, he'd sent Goddard to work comparing the chemical from Cindy to the original. Then he'd begun tinkering with one of his many inventions until he was able to use it to mimic Cindy's voice, whereupon he'd called her parents to tell them she was all right and doing research with him for a school project.

He'd then tried to help Goddard with little success, as he kept getting in his own way. His mind wouldn't let him rest after the conversation he'd had with May, and it kept running over everything she'd told him, trying to come to grips with the information. It left little room for focus, and he'd not only tripped over several wires, but he'd also dropped a beaker, smashed up several test tubes, and nearly put his hand down on the hot plate. It was only natural that Goddard had essentially banned him from helping, as at the moment he was more trouble than he was worth.

It was yet another thing he didn't understand. Normally he could set things aside that were distracting him from accomplishing the task at hand, and at first he'd thought that he'd be able to do the same with this. But it just kept coming up, like some annoying popup ad, and no matter how hard he tried to banish it, it continued to spawn and multiply.

My responses were my own. No one caused them but me...

Jimmy sighed as he rested his head in his hands, his elbows digging into his thighs slightly. He just couldn't believe that. Cindy was a pushy, annoying, conceited loudmouth. He didn't even remotely like her, let alone love her!

Don't remotely like her, huh? Then why suggest that they try and become friends? You can't lie to yourself, so don't even try. Deep down you like her a lot more than you say and you know it.

And what about all those times today when he'd been unable to get away from her? This marked the third, maybe fourth time they'd almost kissed, and every time it had happened he'd been unable to push her away. How could he explain that unless some unknown part of him actually did… like her? Maybe even… love her?

May had sworn to him that she hadn't interfered with him at all, and the blood tests he'd done earlier on himself had come back normal. There was no chance that it had been due to any chemical, as even if someone had injected him with something, he would've found a residue of it somewhere, even after it had long since worn off.

The more he studied it, the more it seemed May had been right, and the more frustrated he was becoming.

A random yet radical question popped to mind as he sat there, startling him slightly. Why was being in love with Cindy such a bad thing? She'd more than proved that she could be nice if she tried, and he'd said himself that if he'd tried a little harder, they would've gotten along just fine. So where was the problem? And why was he working so hard to set things right, as he'd said?

Was it because May had been right? Was it because he really was in love with her and wanted to see her back the way she normally was?

Jimmy groaned a little. When had his brain decided to disagree with him? Was everything going to contradict him today?

But he had to admit (even if it was rather reluctantly) that it was a good point. Why did he want to old Cindy back so badly? It was a question he'd been grappling with for most of the day, and he had yet to find a satisfactory answer. He knew it wasn't just because of his sense of right and wrong; he couldn't lie to himself. He wasn't exactly a saint, after all, even if he did work hard to be a decent son or have the best intentions for his inventions.

I... miss her, he thought suddenly, startled once again by the radical quality of the idea. I never thought I'd say this, but I actually miss arguing with her. It... It was a challenge to try and best her, and I enjoyed that. I can't deny it.

He sighed a little as he lifted his head and glanced at the clock. In a few minutes he had to check Cindy's vital signs, which he'd been doing every ten minutes or so. He supposed that he could've rigged up something quickly to monitor them constantly, but he didn't trust himself in his current state. As far as he was concerned, being able to alter the Enceplo Synthesizer had been a fluke.

"Ugh…"

Cindy's soft groan made his attention snap to her, and to his great surprise, he found that she was stirring slightly. He slid off the stool to kneel beside the couch and touched her shoulder gently.

"Cindy?" he asked softly and watched as her eyes fluttered open. She groaned again and slammed them shut, mumbling something about it being too bright, but soon cracked open one eye to peer at him.

"Jimmy? Where… where am I?" she asked, her voice dry and hoarse. "My entire body aches… what happened to me?"

"You're still in my lab," he told her as he reached down and clasped her wrist. He could sense her frown as he placed two fingers on the underside of her arm while glancing at his watch. "You collapsed a little over an hour and a half ago, clutching your head in pain."

"Oh," she said, tugging on the wrist in his grasp. "So why are you taking my pulse?"

"I've been monitoring it for the past hour," he said, frowning as he counted. "It has been fluctuating wildly, but it seems that it's finally evened out." He finished and placed her arm back down on the couch as lightly as possible. "So what part of you hurts the most? Is it your head?"

"I feel… like someone hit me with a stick," she said, licking her dry lips and swallowing. "I just ache all over; there isn't one specific place. My head is pounding, my arms and legs feel shaky, and my vision is sliding in and out of focus. Does that give you anything to work with?"

You know, it almost sounds like she's back to normal, he thought, blinking a few times. Only one way to test it to be sure...

"I've got one more question for you," he asked before taking a deep breath and preparing himself for her (hopefully) bad reaction. "Are you… um… are you still in love with me?" He winced and tensed when she stared up at him, her eyes widening slightly.

"What kind of question is that? You had nothing to do with this, did you?" she asked, frowning, and Jimmy felt a small glimmer of hope appear within him. "Of course I still love you."

Gas planets, he thought, sitting back on his heels glumly. So much for hoping that he wouldn't have to do anything more…

"So have you figured out why I collapsed?" she asked, as though she'd sensed his discomfort and was trying to change the subject. "And does it have anything to do with the way I feel right now?"

"It must," he said, chewing at the inside of his cheek. "After you fainted, I ran some tests on a sample of your blood. I can't believe that I didn't do them when this whole thing first started, but that's not the point."

"You found something then?"

He nodded. "I did. I found a chemical that Goddard had been unable to identify, as its makeup was completely foreign. None of the elements present were from this world."

"How is that possible?" she asked, staring up at him. "I mean, sure, we've had more than enough contact with aliens. But the Gorlocks are too far away, the Yokians would attack you if they showed up, and so on."

"Well, actually…" He looked away as he spoke, rubbing the back of his arm and wincing. "It turns out Mrs. Ojufemi is a Gorlock named May. She came here on behalf of her daughter, April, who wants me to be her husband."

"WHAT!"

Jimmy leapt back in shock from Cindy's enraged shout and his jaw dropped when he found that she was struggling to her feet, flames of anger practically pouring off her as well as dancing in her eyes.

"As if! That green-skinned, big-fanged, ugly ram-girl can think twice before she asks you to be hers!" she seethed, setting herself into a martial arts stance. "If I have to fight her again to keep you from winding up on her planet forever, I will! I don't care what it takes or even if she's stronger than me! I've got speed and skill!"

"Cindy, relax!" he ordered, his tone half amused and half annoyed. "I'm not going anywhere. May was here actually to keep me from accepting April's invitation, and naturally I agreed with her logic."

"Of course you did! You can't go off and marry some… wait. What?" Cindy blinked at him for a moment. "You mean… April's mother was here, ordering you not to become her son-in-law?"

"Exactly," he said with a nod, and Cindy did a double take. "She said that our cultures were too different and that her daughter was being selfish to ask me." He stood then and helped Cindy retake her seat on the couch, as she'd started swaying dangerously the moment her anger had abated.

"Besides, she'd said that the trials I'd have to undergo to even be considered as a potential mate would've killed me."

"Well, good!" Cindy said, frowning emphatically and crossing her arms over her chest. "Because there's no way I would let you go anywhere if it meant you were going to be married off to some alien bimbo! I would imprison you first!"

"Um, thanks… I think," he said as she blinked a few times, her hands coming up to cradle her head. "You really shouldn't be moving right now. May said that the chemical she used to cause all this might have unknown side effects on Humans."

"What was that?" Cindy asked, her tone alarmed, and she looked at him with wide eyes. "You mean… that I am under the influence of some wacko drug?"

"Sort of," he said as he sat beside her. "Right after you collapsed, I ran the test on your blood and came up with the chemical. I then correctly deduced that Mrs. Ojufemi knew more than she was letting on, so I went to see her and found all that stuff out about her and April. She also told me of her plan to turn my affections away from her daughter, which involved you and that necklace you wore yesterday."

"But you said you examined the necklace and found nothing," Cindy said, her frown back, and he nodded.

"That's because I was examining a copy made by May," he said and she lifted an eyebrow questioningly. "She told me that the necklace you wore yesterday was the original, and it injected a special Gorlock chemical into you. What that chemical did was exactly what the book said it would, and that is that it prevents you from telling lies or keeping secrets."

"This seems pretty complicated," she said, and he nodded in agreement. "I mean, why go to all these lengths when she could've just explained the situation to you? Chances were, you could've agreed right off the bat, you know?"

"I think she wanted to remain unknown to me, actually," he said as he tapped a finger against his cheek in thought. "I think she was hoping to discover that if you started announcing your love for me that I would suddenly feel the same way and forget completely about April. That way, if April did ever manage to get past her mother and come here, I'd already be spoken for, so to speak, and April would have no reason to blame her mother for any kind of foul play."

"She told you all of that?"

"Nah, I kinda just now thought of it," he said, giving her a small, sheepish smile. "Plus I think she wanted some kind of bargaining edge on me, so in case the plan didn't work out she could always threaten me."

"So what else did she tell you?"

"Not much," he said, sitting back against the couch. "She gave me some of the original chemical, telling me that she'd never heard of Gorlocks collapsing after being exposed to this chemical, and that it might've mutated upon coming in contact with you. She also gave me the antidote, and right now Goddard is examining the sample of the chemical from your blood and a sample from the original to see if it indeed has changed somehow."

"So Libby was wrong after all," Cindy said quietly and he nodded. "She'll be glad though, because I think she was secretly hoping that it would be something easy for you to fix."

"Yeah…" he said and felt Cindy sigh, her eyes downcast. "What… what's wrong, Cindy?"

"You… you were right," she said softly, her hands dropping to her sides and clenching slightly. "All of this today… it wasn't the real me after all. It was just some stupid drug making me act weird."

Jimmy opened his mouth to argue, a frown creasing his brow, but a loud bark of excitement from Goddard interrupted him. The dog came bounding up to them happily, several sheets of paper clutched in his manipulators, and he handed them over to Jimmy while wagging his tail furiously.

"These are the results from all the tests he was doing," Jimmy said to Cindy as he quickly scanned the pieces of paper, Goddard's excitement slowly infecting him. "It seems that the chemical hasn't mutated at all; it's just adversely affecting your body. Thankfully this is only a new development, and there hasn't been enough time for it to do any permanent damage to you."

"So what happens now?" she asked in a small voice as he set aside the results and looked up at her. "You give me the antidote and poof! Everything goes back to normal? But… what if I don't want…?" She met his gaze briefly before looking away and shaking her head. "What if I don't want things to go back to the way they were? What if I want to stay this way? I can deal with everyone telling me that I'm not acting like myself!"

"But Cindy…" he began with a sigh, trailing off when he couldn't think of how to vocalize his thoughts.

"I have no choice, do I? If I don't, this stupid drug will kill me, right?" she said, bringing her knees to her chest and hugging them. "Jimmy, I… I like being like this. Not all dizzy and achy, but I feel like this huge stone has been lifted from my shoulders."

"Because you've finally told me, right?" he said softly and after a moment she nodded a little. "But think about it, Cindy. That chemical is kind of like cheating, don't you agree? It's made it so you don't care if I feel the same way or not, or that people will seriously question your sanity. I mean, wouldn't it be more meaningful if you were able to tell me all this when you were your regular self?"

She sat silently, her eyes studying the floor intently, but after a moment, she again nodded slightly.

"You're always so logical," she said quietly, her arms tightening around her knees, and he slid from the couch.

"Hey, this is saving your life," he said defensively. "And it isn't going to erase your feelings, you know. You'll just be given back your ability to keep them hidden." He tried to interject some cheer in his voice, but the somber look in Cindy's eyes sent a pang of guilt through him.

"Goddard, could you bring me that antidote as well as the hypodermic gun that May gave us?" he said, still watching Cindy, and she'd tensed at his words. Goddard gave a few barks in acknowledgement before trotting off and leaving them alone.

"Please don't fight us," he said, assuming that she'd tensed in preparation to bolt, and she lifted her head to fix him with that grave look. It made part of him clench painfully and his breath hitched in his throat.

"I'm not going to," she said as he took a small step towards her, and acting on impulse, he snatched up her hands before squeezing them lightly.

"Nothing bad is going to happen," he told her when she blinked at him in surprise. "So please quit looking at me like the world is going to end, okay?"

"In a way it is," she whispered as Goddard returned, the loaded hypodermic gun in hand. Jimmy dropped both of Cindy's hands so that he could take the tool from Goddard, swallowing as he studied the blue, bubbly liquid present in the transparent chamber. Why did he suddenly feel so nervous? Here was the answer he'd been seeking all day…

Goddard's whine broke him from the slight trance he'd been in, and he gave the dog a small smile before turning back to Cindy. She smiled sadly as he took his seat beside her, pressing a few buttons on the butt of the tool and it hissed slightly as it readied itself.

"At least it's not a needle," she said as she held out her arm. "Go on, Jimmy. It's now or never."

He nodded once as he placed the rounded muzzle of the tool against the bare skin of her bicep, and she shivered slightly.

"Cold?" he asked and she nodded a little. "Just a few more seconds and it'll be over, okay?" She nodded again and he pulled the trigger. The tool gave a faint hiss as well as a faint beep, and he watched the blue liquid slowly leave the firing chamber and enter directly into her bloodstream.

"There," he said once it had finished, and handed the tool back to Goddard. Cindy was shivering again, her hand coming up to clasp the spot where the muzzle had pressed against her skin, and she looked at him as she bit her lip slightly.

"One last thing…" she said softly, and before he could react, she leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the lips.

He gave a muffled gasp of surprise and she pulled away slowly, leaving his lips with a faint, tingling sensation. She smiled as a deep blush began to crawl across his cheeks, but before he could say anything (though part of him seriously questioned if he could actually form a sentence in his current state of shock) she shivered again and fell back against the couch.

"Cindy!"

She gave him a small smile and reached up to tenderly press her hand to his cheek. "I'm all right," she whispered. "I'm just suddenly exhausted…"

"It must be the antidote," he said as he reached up to clasp her hand, feeling it slide as she steadily weakened. Her eyelids kept drooping and her breathing was progressively deepening.

"Yeah…" She'd shut her eyes at last, but her hand twitched against his and she continued to speak. "Don't forget… okay? Don't forget that I… I love you…" she trailed off as her body relaxed and she lapsed into unconsciousness. He studied her sleeping face for a moment before placing her hand over the other one, which rested in her lap.

I can't promise that... he thought with a sigh as he slid from the couch and moved her into a more comfortable position. Goddard nudged him slightly as he sat on the stool and placed his head in his hands, feeling distinctly shaken, but strangely enough… part of him felt like doing cartwheels. Where was the grimace of disgust he'd displayed when he'd kissed that dream Cindy? He'd only felt like this once… well, make that twice before, when he'd been kissed by Betty after the play and by April just before their return trip to Earth. Did this mean that…?

Sometimes I wish I didn't have feelings...

Okay, I'm finally getting closer to the end, at long last. I've never written anything this long chapter wise before… wowie. So what do y'all think of this chapter? (wiggles eyebrows slightly) Hopefully the next chapter will have more loveable fluff, but I make no promises. Though at my heart I am a hopeless romantic, I find it hard to find a balance between the mushy mush I long to write and the believability behind it. Because you've got to have some, right?

Please let me know how you think I'm doing, and I'll love you forever.