Disclaimer: own nuffing! Nuff said!sob sadly to self
This chapter is dedicated to meine fabby beta reader GaryLovesPickles and to raemie! Love you both! XXX
Princess Banana-Hammock
Chapter 1: Princess Banana-Hammock?
Friday 28th August 15:01
Have resolved to keep a diary!
Have resolved to call diary "something". Not sure what though!
15:03
Have resolved to call diary Princess Banana-Hammock! Or PBH for short!
Ginny, PBH, PBH, Ginny!
15:05
Have also resolved to look up 'resolved' in a dictionary!
15:10
Aaah! The fabbytastic life of meeeee! I am an only child of two very rich people and I call one of them mother and the other I call father and I have a miniature dog and I call her Mini! And I am also an absolutely marvy-parvy liar.
And the reason I am saying that I am a marvy-parvy liar is because I was just lying to you and you never noticed!
Don't look at me like that because I know that you didn't know that I was lying!
No you didn't!
NO YOU DIDN'T!
15:22
Fine, I'll just burn a corner of your page! Then who'll laugh?
15:31
BLOODY. SODDING. HELL!
Damn you and your secret plan to destroy my eyebrows!
15:35
Ha! I now have a completely spiffing little plan!
I am going to use "Maggie's Magical Hair Regrowing Potion"! So ha! I won't be an eyebrowless fool for much longer!
Shut up of course it will work!
15:48
OH BLOODY HELL! What in the name of Merlin's fluffy g-string is happening to my face?
Stop saying "i told you so"!
Oh ya! Well you were thinking it!
Why do I look like a traumatised red-headed Dumbledore?
It was only supposed to regrow my eyebrows, not make me look like I have mice living in my ears and nose!
15:57
OH SACRE BLOODY MERDE! I think I just killed mum!
No of course not on purpose!
Well, she walked in the door saying "Ginny dear, Harry's coming in two hours so I want you to tidy your- (cue opening door and mum walking in!) –AAAAAAAGGGHHH!
Them flump! She fell back out of the door.
16:02
Well it wouldn't have happened if she had given me at least two minutes warning so I could have barricaded the door. Then the barricade would have saved me an extra second to remember the door opened outwardly, and this outwardness of the door would have given me a millisecond to dive under the safety of my bed sheets and explain throatily that I was (cough) sick!
16:05
Okay, mums still on the floor, better check if she's alright.
WAIT A SECOND! What was she saying before she so rudely interrupted herself by falling backwards?
Don't tell me you don't remember! You're a diary, it's your job to remember!
Fine, be all moody! See if I care! Hay! I wrote it down so I can read it! HAHA! God I am so marvellously brainy!
Hey don't be mean! Just because I accidentally made myself look like a man about five minutes ago, doesn't mean I'm not marvellously brainy!
16:07
Falalala. (Reading back over last page to prove how brainy I am!)
16:08
OH BLOODY MONKEYS TESTICLES!
HARRY IS COMING!
IN TWO HOURS!
AND!
I!
LOOK!
LIKE!
A!
GORILLA!
OOOOK! Meine fabby readers! How are youuuuuuu! Ok this is my first diary-entry-slash-harry-potter-fan-fiction so please be kind to me! Although constructive criticism is welcomed!
Oh and please go and read all of "raemie"s fanfiction stories because she is a new writer and one of my fantabby best friends! So be nice to her too!
Till next chappie
BYEZ! XXX