Chapter 19 - This Is How We Find Completion
19/1/6

The night falls suddenly in the city. There's the bright sunlight, descending slowly… and then that thin length of elastic holding that ball of fire in the sky snaps, and the day plummets into night.

Blink, and you'll miss it.

Blink, and it's as though the day was never here at all.

Blink… and you'll open your eyes to a whole new world.

A car screams down an empty road, taillights an over exposed photograph, following like a laser behind the stream of the vehicle. Outside an exclusive apartment building, a homeless man shivers in the ribbon of night; gazes up at those hundred squares of dark and light, a constellation, a sequence unseen. Someone flicks a switch, and the pattern changes again. Who turned that lamp off? Do those two silhouettes move in the throes of passion, or hatred, or both? Who lives in the apartment with the bright orange drapes, the neglected plant on the balcony, the forgotten towel which threatens to be snatched away by the wind…? And who lives at the very top, in the penthouse apartment… draped in the stars and ruling over the people below…

A siren wails, near and far, near and far… serenading the night. A car backfires like the crack of a gunshot, and somewhere close a child jolts as the mind incorporates the sound into dreams. Billboards flash stock market values to a desolate square; a Greyhound bus rattles through, shuttling people to somewhere much like this, their heads pressed into makeshift pillows against the windows. A girl meanders along the pavement, blocks from home, immersed in the illusion of silence.

It's any city in any world.

She wanders past the forgotten front page of a newspaper, caught by the wind hours ago and flicked to the sidewalk below. She doesn't look at the words emblazoned on the front in dirty grey. She is lost to the starlight, hidden beyond the glare of neon lights.

'EIGHTEEN MONTHS ON: THERE'S NO HOPE LEFT.'.

And in smaller writing, below.

'Oceanic Airlines finally admits to negligence, and faces up to the deaths of 305 passengers and 15 crew members aboard the infamous Flight 815.'

She walks on, humming a tune she can't name, feet skipping over each other in the remnants of a dance.

And somewhere so far from here, somewhere far beyond the sirens and simulated daylight and lives being lived out atop each other; a child's first cry fills the air, rising and falling as she slips from her mother's internal warmth into her father's waiting arms.

She took her first independent breath; this tiny rag of flesh and life, a person, the world changed forever as she slipped into the moment. Jack's vision blurred with tears, an endless stream as he cradled his baby daughter in his arms; shaking with emotion, he clamped and cut the umbilical cord, that fleshy length that had fed his little girl as she grew and made her way into the world. Kate, flooded with exhaustion and happiness, strained forward to see the infant… overwhelmed with the experience, hair slick to her forehead, eyes glinting with a queue of tears.

She couldn't begin to explain the feelings saturating her, filling her, spilling over… all those months of waiting to see if her suspicions were correct, that first appearance of a bump, the first kick as Jack whispered to her stomach deep in the night. And now, like a piece of her heart torn from her chest and held before her; Jack cradling their daughter, her little form slick and perfect in his arms. This is my family, Kate thought, trying to capture the moment forever, knowing the image would never leave her mind.

"Jack… is she, is she okay?" Kate leaned forward on her arms, shaking with fatigue, craning to see her little girl.

Jack finished gently wiping the amniotic fluid from his tiny child, wrapped her in the clean white sheet Sun held out, swaddling her. Tufts of damp chocolate hair poked their way out from the fabric, and her cries subsided; her nose wrinkling up at the abruptness of being born.

Jack could scarcely talk; the motion so innately Kate. The smile started at the corners of his lips, reaching his dimples, his eyes, every inch of him. He choked on the tears taking him over.

"She's perfect." She was the tiniest, purist, most innocent thing he had ever seen. Jack could feel himself falling, further and further, falling in love with his child, and the mother of his child, all over again. And he knew, walking the two steps to this woman he loved more than life itself, he would never stop falling again.

Jack handed his daughter over, that minute weight of flesh and fluff filling Kate's arms and sitting there, the motion more natural than breathing. Her little red lips fluttered, blowing kisses to the air… tears streamed from Kate's eyes, uncontrollable, flowing like the love which inundated her heart. Jack sat down beside them both, her arms encircling Kate, her arms encircling their daughter.

Our daughter. Kate looked up to him, her eyes saying all she couldn't under the weight of the love overwhelming her.

Thank you. I love you. I love you more than I can begin to describe, for all the reasons I cannot find words for. I love you for being you, for loving me, for giving me all you have. Your heart. Your trust. Your days and nights. Your world.

Our child.

It wouldn't be easy. There was no diapers, no immunisations, none of all those things they would have taken for granted in the real world. There was no hospital for first-time-Mom worries about all those things which would turn out to be nothing. There was no nursery, no school, so many things missing. They were terrified.

But there was love.

Two tiny eyes flickered open, and like a perfect combination of them both, they held her Daddy's chestnut colour and her Mommy's almond shape. Cinnamon flecks looked to them both in turn, watching these two strangers crying and staring at her and somehow knowing, These are who will protect me. These are who will love me. Who do love me.

Jack leaned in… kissed his daughter's forehead, stroking those tiny wisps of hair, velvet. Grinning, his happiness spilling from him to the atmosphere, he found Kate; pressed his forehead into hers, their tears mixing as he nestled into her. His hand found hers under their little girl's head, their fingers entwined, protecting that tiny child.

"Thank you, Katie." Jack's voice shook as he spoke. "Thank you for giving me all this."

Kate looked from him, to their child, to Jack again… knowing she would never, ever run again.

"That's what families do."

The placenta was delivered, Kate fed endless amounts of fruit to restore her blood sugar levels; Jack all the while cooing over his gorgeous little girl in Aaron's old crib. Everybody came, sharing in the joy, Jack and Kate's pride, the new bundle of life created. There were endless congratulations, little presents, and so so many smiles.

Sawyer was last… meandering behind, kicking the dust and trying to hide the huge smile he felt encroaching upon him as he approached the cave. He shook Jack's hand, firm and strong; slapped him on the back in a brief embarrassed hug.

"Congratulations, man."

"Thanks."

Sawyer leaned into the cot, watching as the tiny form splayed her arms and legs, floating through whatever babies dream of.

"Well I'll be damned." He smiled at Kate in the mouth of the cave, watching her daughter peacefully doze. "At least she didn't get your looks, Doc." He smiled, winked at them both; briefly stroked the child's warm cheek. She was Kate. She was the tiny, perfect, spit of Kate.

"She… she's beautiful." He whispered it, his words surprising even himself. He could almost feel himself melting; watching that bundle of innocence squirm, Kate's expression more at home and at peace than he had ever seen her. Sawyer nodded to Jack, who turned back to the baby as Sawyer wandered over to her mother.

"Well, Mama, you've got your hands full now." Sawyer's hands were jammed in his pockets, his eyes flitting from Kate's to the floor. Kate laughed at him, stood with a wince; wrapped her arms around his rigid frame.

"Don't think you're getting out of babysitting duty just 'cause you're a bad boy." She laughed, as he hesitatingly reciprocated the hug.

"Freckles, I've got a lot to teach that little one." Sawyer smiled as he withdrew from the embrace. "I'm happy for you, Frec - Kate. I'm happy you're happy at last. That he's done - whatever is it he's done - to make you be like this."

Kate smiled, looked at him, slightly puzzled. "Like what?"

"Like you know how beautiful you really are. How good."

She smiled, looked to the ground, blushing and suddenly unsure. Sawyer had changed so much; she felt like a big sister coming back from college to find her little brother all grown up.

Jack watched as the two parted. He could see the ties that would bind them always, stretched between them like super glue; and knew his future wife, and little girl, would always have someone to watch over them from afar.

Kate wandered over to him, smiling beyond her own control. Jack could feel her eyes on him as he leaned over the cradle; knew exactly how her arms would wrap around his waist, her head leaning to the side of his back. Together gazing at the product of their love.

Jack murmured to her, aching to never leave the moment.

"Are you okay? In any pain?"

She replied as a whisper, never moving. "Just a little."

The baby mewed; stretched her tiny arms up. Kate broke into a laugh, moving closer to her daughter, watching her face scrunch in fatigue.

"Well she wakes up just like her Daddy." Kate leaned into him as Jack's arms glided around her, his head coming to rest on her right shoulder, each unable to tear their gaze from the tiny form which now ruled their hearts.

Jack thought of all those endless conversation about names; lying on the beach with Kate's head in his lap, their hands drawn together over her growing belly. There had been hours of jokes; Cuthbert, Wilomena, endless varieties of Jack. The laughter had filled them up, bound them like the child between them. Each time a short list had been found, they had started all over again. And then finally two names for each sex remained.

Kate read his mind. "So…" She leaned down, gently cradled her waking little girl, supporting her head. The baby whimpered slightly, then found the layer of warmth against her mother's breast, nuzzling into the soft worn fabric of clothing. Kate stroked a tiny foot, those perfect toes, that skin so brilliantly new.

"Christina?"

It had been Jack's idea, honouring his father. Kate liked the name, and knew how much he had emulated the man, how much he regretted never saying goodbye. She could feel Jack move his head behind her; reached down to his daughter's hand. She wrapped four minute fingers around his pinkie, and Jack gasped with delight at the gesture.

He smiled, knowing what was right, seeing his little girl in front of him now.

"She's not a Christina. I don't want… I don't want to name her after him. She was born of us landing here, and finding each other. Of new beginnings." Jack kissed Kate's shoulder. "Is that okay?"

Gently she turned around, held their child in her arms so she lay between them both. Kate looked up to Jack, caught his lips, kissed him delicately. Her clear blue eyes burned into his chocolate pools, telling him all he would ever need to know.

"That's okay."

Thirty-eight faces looked to them expectantly, waiting. Thirty-eight smiles filled the clearing. Thirty-eight sets of eyes gazed at the little family before them, and thirty-eight hearts pounded with the wish that one day, they might be lucky enough to find such completion.

"Everyone." Jack stepped up to the platform and didn't try to hide the smile that filled his every pore. "I'd like to introduce you to someone."

Kate held the infant in her arms as Jack helped her up to stand beside him. He kissed both foreheads, automatic, unembarrassed before the crowd. He watched his daughter as she surveyed the room, hours old, and already with him wrapped around her little finger.

"This-" He found Kate's eyes, her almost imperceptible nod. "This is Adia Rhaegan Shephard. Our daughter."

It mattered not that there was no champagne, no sea of bows and pink paper to be torn from gifts. Thirty eight people leapt to their feet, cheers and whoops and joy cluttering the air. Sawyer pulled the camera from the corner of Jack's pack; crept closer to the couple as they both gazed at little Adia between them. Click.

Kate in front, both arms supporting her daughter, her gaze on the little girl's outstretched arms and wide gaze. Jack slightly to the side and behind, his right arm around Kate's shoulders, his left hand on his child's head.

All three lost in their own little world.

The celebrations lasted well into the night; games, songs, anecdotes from a life long forgotten. The fire danced in the middle of them all, drawing everyone closer… Kate sat in the remnants of heat, leaning against the cave entrance; her child in her arms, making silent promises.

I promise to always be here for you. I promise to always love you, beyond anything you could ever do. I promise to protect you from all the bad things out there. I promise to never let you down, never be too busy to talk, never let you give up on your dreams. I promise to try and be a cool Mom. I promise to embarrass you constantly. I promise to never, ever leave you.

Jack sat down on the rock platform; a leg each side of Kate, she sitting on the ground a foot below. Gently, he pressed a kiss into her hair; rested his chin atop her head. His daughter slept, safe and protected, loved.

"Penny for them?" He whispered into Kate's ear, kneading his hands into her neck. "You need sleep, hunny. You gave birth today."

Kate grimaced jokingly. "I remember." She tilted her head back, leaning into Jack's lap until her eyes met his. "It's just… I love her so much, Jack. I can't imagine her not being here. I can't imagine…" Kate could feel the lump in her throat, swallowed against it. "I can't imagine not having you both." A tear escaped the corner of her eye, curling and carving to where dimples lay.

Jack leapt up, stepped off the platform; crouched in the dirt beside this girl, this woman, this person he loved more than he could even imagine. Who had given him all he ever wanted. Who, just sitting here with his daughter curled in her arms, broke his heart as it overflowed with emotion. He caught the single tear as it curved under Kate's jaw, kissed beside her eye as another fell.

"That's good. Because…" He ran the pad of his thumb over Adia's little chin. "We're not going anywhere. We kinda love you too much."

Kate grinned, sniffed back her tears, fell to the kiss Jack offered.

"I love you both too. More then I could ever tell you, Jack."

"I know."

They fell to an embrace, her arms wrapped around him, both gazing to the child they flanked. From across the clearing, eyes watched as the family gathered together, becoming one in the heat of the fire.

Completion.

The End