Divided We Stand

by Gingerrogersforever

Drake and Josh over hear private conversations and find out that a hurtful blow is coming to them soon concerning their family. My third D&J story, R&R!

2. Awaken

"Divided We Stand" – Chapter Two, "Awaken"

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Summary: Drake and Josh over - hear private conversations and find out that a hurtful blow is coming to them soon concerning their family. My third D&J story, R&R!

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A/N: Second chapter's up! I love writing this story. Hopefully it's not stupid. :-D Happy reading! EDIT: Again, I have tried to break up the sentences to make it easier toread.Sorry it was hard to read guys. I didn't think anything of it because that's the way I always wrote "Party in a Box". :-/ Anyhow, it is as divided up as I can possibly divide now, so hopefully everyone can read it.
-Morgan

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Fic Information--

Story: "Divided We Stand"

Chapter: "Awaken", Two

Date Chapter Finished: February Ninth, Two-Thousand and Six

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"What?-! You mean that they might actually be thinking of getting a… divorce?" Drake gasped, his eyes popping as he dropped back to the desk.

"I don't know, but isn't that what it sounds like to you? 'It's over Walter'? 'Being so hard to leave after being here for so long'? Drake, what else could it mean?" Josh said, in a quipping voice.

"Oh… my gosh. Mom and Dad are seriously divorcing? We're going to get our old lives back!" Drake exclaimed, standing up again and walking around his brother, who stood in front of him.

"That's good, isn't I—" Josh began to speak in a quiet tone, but his brother interrupted him: "It's better than good, it's amazing! I never thoughts it would happen! I never even imagined! Everything we had going for us in our olds lives are coming back!"

"Yeah, well maybe… Maybe I just may not want mine back." Josh murmured, in a deeply upset voice, glancing at the ground and turned to start toward the door.

"Wait—Josh! W-wait! What are you talking about?" Drake replied, frowning and racing across the room and leaning in to grab his step brother's arm.

"I don't know, Drake, I… I guess I'm just in shock, that's all." the slow answer reached the brown eyed teenager's ears.

"Josh," he replied, in an earnest voice: "What is it?"

"Look, man, I think this is just plain horrible! I know you probably never wanted me as a brother, and I was even scared of the idea myself, but I can't even imagine leaving this family. You know that if Dad leaves, he's going to insist on taking me with him, and I don't want to leave you. You may not understand me, and I sometimes I maybe not understand you, but I love you as much as I would love a blood brother of mine. We're a team—we always have been—and we have always hung in there for each other. With out you, Drake," Josh closed his eyes in a long, emotional blink and then shook his head turning away a little: "With out you, I can't even have any more good times. …I just don't want to have my old life back, but I guess that doesn't really matter. Nothing matters."

"It matters, Josh. You know it does." Drake replied, hardly knowing how to respond to such a shocking and raw statement of how his brother felt.

"No, Drake, it... it really doesn't, now. I'll--I'll talk to you later." the quiet, deeply upset and almost heart broken answer came, as he shook his head again and walked to the door, opening it.

"Where are you going?" the other boy asked, taking a few quick, halting steps across the room as he looked up after his step brother.

"I... I have to do some homework. I'll see you in a while, I guess." Josh murmured, before slipping out the door and leaving it standing open behind him, as Drake listened to him step down the stairs.

After staring at the door way to their room for a long while, he grabbed up a throw pillow from their couch and tossed it across the expanse of the room, bending his brow in to a frown and letting out a frustrated groan as he hurried to his bed and took the ladder three rungs at a time, flinging himself in to it and burying his throbbing head in the mound of soft pillows. He sighed in to them and turned over, staring at the ceiling for a while.

How could his Mom and Dad be doing this? What a mess! Now Josh was angry. Or upset, or... or what ever it was that he was.

He thought he knew what he wanted, but now he wasn't sure. Actually, he wasn't really sure about anything, now. He had thought it might be fun to live his old life-- stay in bed as long as he wanted until his mother finally got him up, late-- no more annoying Josh buzzing around him or jumping up and down on his mattress until he promised to get out of the warm bed; no more Oprah; no more crazy situations; and really, no more pranks from Megan. But the question that continued running through his head and kept him so confused was this-- with out Josh, with out all the crazy schemes and nutty situations, with out the pranks that Megan pulled on them, and even with out the kindness Josh was always giving to him-- would Drake really still be Drake? Would he really be the same aside from the step - family he had grown so accustom to?

Then the memories began to rush back to his dizzy mind-- he remembered when he and Josh went to take their drivers' license tests together, he remembered the big adventure in Hollywood that had happened a few months ago-- how the two brothers had stuck together and ended up saving the day. He remembered so much more-- the Dune Buggy, the sheep, the Zero Gravity guitar contest. The talent contest last year, when Josh had gotten up and done "Soul Man" with him and faced the crowd, even though he was afraid. There were so many good times they had had together, that now Drake was beginning to feel frightened at the prospect of it all possibly coming to an end.

Even though Josh was a total dork at times, and a geek, and even though he did his homework, and he actually tried to eat healthy, maybe... just maybe Drake had begun to almost love that geekiness over the years and through the times they had shared together.

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"But-- but Josh! Dad! Please, you can't do this!" the thin, now weak - voiced Drake Parker pleaded, a fearing look written in his glimmering eyes and a painful expression stroked over his face.

"No, Drake. We have to." came Walter's cold, almost loathsome reply. "I'll be back in a minute, Josh, I have to go talk with the moving van and make sure they have our address right." he finished, turning to his biological son and after he issued a nod, took off down the pathway, toward the end of the drive way, where the large yellow van sat on the curb.

Josh had already said his goodbyes to Megan, and though he expected nothing more than a simple: "I'm sorry you're leaving. Goodbye, Josh." he wasn't truly surprised that the little girl had begun to cry and cling to him in a hug. After a few more minutes, her mother finally took her up to her room, to try and comfort her there.

"Josh," Drake exclaimed, his voice finally cracking and his eyes melting in to tearful blurs: "You have to stay with me! You can't leave, you're my brother-- my real brother."

"I--I know, Drake. I don't want to leave you. But the--the courts say that I have to go with..." the boy's own dark voice faded off in to emotional chokes and finally he managed to clear his eyes and bring his head up, glancing across at his brother, standing on the threshold of the front door, leaning the side of his limp body on the door frame and a weak, broken shimmer of tears on his cheeks.

"Will you write me? Will you call me when you get moved in? ...L-Las Angles is so far away." the grey, hollow words rolled over Drake's numb lips.

"Yeah, I guess it is pretty far away when you've lived in the same room together for four and something odd years." Josh, replied, in a half - choked up sentence.

"Josh... you've done so much for me--you've done so much for everybody! ...How am I going to live with out you there to keep me from going crazy?" the very upset teenager asked, looking up deeply in to his brother's grey - hazel eyes.

"Oh, hush, Drake..." Josh finally exclaimed through his tears and he looked on only a minute more at his brother before he dropped his suitcase to the concrete of the front porch and he stepped forward, clasping the thin, brunette teen age boy in his arms until they both began to sob.

"I still love you, Drake. You have to promise me that you'll remember that. Even if you forget about all the good things we did together and all the fun times we had, just remember that I loved you. And even though I may be far away from you, I'll always be right there, holding your hand and hugging my brother, in your heart, okay? You can make it with out me. You're a cool guy."

Drake was trying so hard to compose himself and think up something to say in reply to such a heart breaking speech, that he felt himself jump and his head snap up when he heard his step - father shout from across the yard, in an almost bitter voice: "Come on, Josh-- it's time to go."

Josh turned back to his brother and Drake's eyes widened. "...It, it is time to go, now. I love you more than anybody, Drake." leaning down to grab the handle of his suitcase and stepping down the few steps to the brick walkway, Josh looked up for the last time and finally said the words which Drake had been dreading all of this time: "...Goodbye, brother."

"Good… bye, Josh." The strangled words emerged from Drake's lips, as he stared at his brother, and felt another hot tear slide down his face.

Josh continued to look at him, trying to keep himself from bursting in to tears, and both boys felt a wince when Walter called him name once again: "Josh!"

"C—coming, Dad…" Josh began to yell back, but quieted when his tears overcame his voice and his words knotted tightly in his throat. Closing his eyes, after a moment, he turned his back to the other boy and slowly stepped away, down the walk way toward the truck that his father was waiting for him in.

Drake hardly even knew it when he stepped up to the very edge of the porch and leaned unstably on the rail, and as he began to feel his chest tighten, he heard the upstairs window above him slide open.

"Mommy—why does Josh have to leave? It's not fair." a despondent, weak - from - crying little girl's voice floated down to the teen ager's ears.

"I don't know, Megan, sweetie. It just has happened this way, though it doesn't seem fair." Came his mother's own, quiet words.

"Yeah…" he whispered miserably, to himself as he looked out at the yellow vehicle that his brother was climbing in to: "It's not fair."

It was really about five whole minutes until anything happened, because they had to secure the back door to the moving van and clamp down the special locks, but when it came, Drake felt the full blow. The van's diesel motor cranked up loud—so loud that Megan, upstairs, grabbed her ears and felt her head throb—but Drake didn't bother to plug his ears, nor did he really care, after all, these were the very last moments he would see his brother, perhaps for years and years.

The over sized truck began to move backward, in reverse, so that they could get lined up in the street, and Josh leaned to the side window of the cab. As he began to wave, Drake lost control of himself and started out toward the end of the drive way. He knew full well that he couldn't stop his brother and step father from leaving, but he wasn't really going to try—it was too late now. All he wanted now was to feel one last moment of their brotherhood—to see Josh's face one last time. He stopped running out of exhaustion, halfway down the long concrete drive, but he managed to straighten up and lift a hand to slowly wave. He could see his brother's face very well, and he could tell he was barely restraining tears as well, as the truck finally shifted in to "drive" and he slowly left behind the only brother he'd ever known.

Drake's shoulders where quivering violently and they were both crying by the time to truck was past their house and the two teenagers stared at each other until both faded from view. But as fast as they had been thrown together as two opposites, it was now all over with.

The brunette boy stood in the same spot for at least three or four minutes after the sight of the moving van had gone from his view, simply trying to pull himself together enough to go back inside and face the lonely house that he used to find so content and happy. Finally, he looked down at the ground and let out a heaving, shivering sigh, and as soft thunder broke overhead in the grey, cloud - filled sky, he turned slowly, his hands finding his pockets and his teeth biting his lip in anxiety as he walked up to the front door.

He was so messed up-- so utterly confused and hurt, that he was genuinely surprised when he was able to make it by himself up the stairs and find his own way to the bed room he had used to share with his brother. As he walked in to the room, through the door way, he shuddered and felt his stomach twist at the sight of the half - empty floor, where his brother's old bed used to sit. His legs hurt so bad from standing outside for such a long time and watching the movers carry every single piece of furniture of Josh's from the house to the truck, and he just began to realize it now. He sighed weakly and winced as he brought himself to walk over and sit on the couch in the center of the overly empty room.

The second he sat down, he gasped in pain, and though his legs did hurt that bad, it was for an entirely different reason. Reaching beneath himself, he grabbed something and pulled it from between the two seats cushions of the sofa, holding it in front of him. The article laying in his hands made him smile and yet feel a deep pain in his heart, like a stab of a knife. He ran his fingers over the little miniature bound notebook that had the words printed over the front in small, sophisticated letters: "Property of Josh Nichols". It upset him that Josh had forgotten something, but at the same time, he was immensely happy to have something to remember him by, and to pick up and hold when he got lonely for the brother.

Flipping the cover of the little book over, Drake felt a tiny smile form on his lips, even amid the tears in his dewy eyes. The first two pages where blank, but then, when he turned the paper over the third time, something caught his eye and made him frown in confusion as he read it. Scrawled across the paper in a small, neat script, the words Drake read his own name, which was written at the top left corner of the page.

Dear Drake--
Hi brother. By now, I'm already gone and you're probably sitting alone on our couch, am I correct?
Anyway, that doesn't matter. Don't worry, I left this behind on purpose because I wanted you to have
something to remember me by, even if we were far apart. I don't want you to be too sad, because
that would make me sad too. Okay, so I may be a dork with words in a note like this, but this is important.

Drake's amazed eyes finished scanning the little page of lined paper and he curiously lifted his shivering hand, to flip it over and read more or this mysterious note:

I just want you to know that I love you. I wish I knew some way to put it differently, some way that would
make you laugh, or maybe some way that's poetic or something, but all I can think of right now are
the words. You're the best brother anyone could ever have and I can't believe I'm having to leave you.
It hurts me so bad. Even though we two used to fight sometimes or whatever, I know deep down that
we never meant anything we said or did. I mean, about the Foam Finger, or Mindy, or about-- well, what
ever it happened to be about. Anyway, I think that you've got to be the greatest in the world to be
able to apologize and to still love me even when I act all nutty like all brothers do.

Maybe we mis-calculated about the step brother thing at first. I mean, because we thought it would never
work in a million years, but look how much great stuff we've done together? I still can't believe that we
didn't get more than a few years together... I mean, we were so close to seeing each other grow up and
start all kinds of stuff. Like when we had all that stuff happen to us in Hollywood and you got on TRL--man,
I don't think I have ever been more proud of you. If anyone should be moving to Las Angles, it should be
you. You have the extreme talent to get a record or movie deal, and you'd be humongous in L.A. Like I
said before, I just don't get all of this. None of this even makes any logic sense.

Anyway, out of all of that stuff, the thing I want you to know most is that you taught me to loosen up a lot to
the world, and I'm forever grateful to you for that. And I don't know about you, but with all those great things
that have happened to us, well--I'm never going to forget a single second of the memories we made. I'll
always love you brother, and I want you to know that you'll always be my idol. Even if you never made
it to being a huge teen pop star, you are always going to be the dude I look up to for guidance. Thanks
for everything brother. And, I know that God can't let this be the end of us. So, until we meet face to face
again someday when you're a big star and I'm standing in your autograph line, I love you, Drake.

--Your Brother,
Josh.

The small little book slid from Drake's grip-less hands and he closed his eyes tightly, trying very hard to shut out the tears that were threatening him so much. "I love you, too, Josh..." he managed to murmur, almost melting at his own words, down in to a tiny, sobbing, shaking heap on the couch. And all he could mutter over and over was: "I love you too."

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Suddenly, Drake eyelids snapped open and he jerked so hard he psychically threw himself off of his mattress, scattering cds and other assorted things that were on his bed, across the ledge, some even tumbling over the edge and down, on to the floor.

"Wha-- what the--?" he murmured to himself, sitting up like lightning and glancing around, trying to figure out how he had almost mystically gotten from sitting on the couch to laying in his bed. Then with out warning, the conclusion hit him, making him exclaim in surprise: "Well, snap, it was a dream! Gosh! Aaargh! Stupid--over--active--brain!" He reared back his hand and gave himself a very vigorous slap, sending a painful zap through his system, but waking him fully, and putting an end to any possible danger of him falling back in to a sleep and dreaming such a horrendous dream, another time.

But after a moment of gaining his composure, Drake let out an irrepressible gasp as he realized something.

"Wait, if I and Josh don't do something--this dream could actually come TRUE! No way! N-no way am I letting that happen! I cannot let my brother be taken away from me; no matter what Mom and Dad might be thinking is "best" for the family! If it happened in any way even remotely like I dreamt it, then it wouldn't be good at all for our family! Oh, man, this is a mess."

Then, he remembered the upset way Josh had left the room earlier, and he winced as he had in his so- realistic dream. He moved from his perch on the ledge of his bed and jumped quickly down to the rug on the wooden floor, glancing over at the clock, curious as to what time it could be and how long he had slept there, in that spot. It was five forty five by the clock on Josh's night table, and this made Drake sigh in relieved contentment as he ran a hand through his slightly messy hair, to smooth it back and then hurried down the stairs in the hall.

"Good, I only slept for maybe forty five minutes. Maybe Josh will be willing to talk about this by now. And anyway, perhaps this dream was meant to give me a different perspective on all of this. Because like in the dream, he really does love me. And I love him too. I think I do, don't I?"

As he walked, he thought for a moment, and then the answer came quickly. He did! He knew it now, he did love Josh some where deep inside his heart, and there was no way or even slight chance in the world that he was going to let go of his brother with out atleast trying and giving up a fair fight for him. After all of the things he had done for Drake, the very least he could do in return was to hold on to him.

When he reached the living room, he glanced around to find it empty, and hearing the rain pattering gently on the roof, he took a wild guess that perhaps Josh was out on the porch watching the rain and thinking about all this stuff. Going on his usually correct gut feeling, he ran a few tired steps to the front door and opened it, softly stepping out and looking around the little area.

Surely enough, sitting over at the left - end of the porch, on the out door porch swing, staring out at the rain, was the dark haired, light eyed Josh. Drake smiled upon discovering his brother, and felt a bit relieved at seeing him there, after such an upsetting dream. Letting out a cracking cough and a clearing of his throat, so he wouldn't scare Josh too very much, Drake blinked his chocolate eyes and stepped forward, speaking in a quiet and almost gentle voice: "...Hey, bro."

Josh jumped a bit and turned, looking up at the other teen ager, but then let out a little smile: "Hey."

"So, is the rain more interesting than homework?" Drake asked.

"Well, see I had to--"

"Aww, its okay, don't bother explaining. I came down to see how you were feeling." Drake said stopping him before he could go on, returning the half - smile and coming a few steps over to sit beside him on the swing.

"You... did?" came the question.

"Yep. I know you were upset about this stuff. And I'm sorry for acting like I did. I didn't really think so an hour ago, but I had this really horrible dream when I fell asleep on my bed up there, and well--anyway, I realized I don't want my old life back, either."

"But--but I thought that you didn't actually wa--"

"I know, I know... but I just didn't realize all of the... I just didn't think hard enough, I guess you could say. That dream just--jogged my memory." Drake interrupted, continuing on with a quiet voice and a repentant and sorry tone in his voice.

"Really? You really dreamed about me?" Josh asked, in a quizzical tone and a wide smile for the first time.

"I sure did. And the dream was the worst ever. I dreamt--" the boy lowered his voice and leaned in a little bit, before speaking again: "I dreamt that Dad and Mom did get a divorce and Dad moved to L.A. with you! It was horrible. And in the dream I cried all the time."

"T-that is horrible! ...Man, Drake, we totally can't let that happen, can we? I couldn't leave you!" Josh said, shaking his head and reaching down to grab his brother's hand.

"Of course we can't! That's why I came to apologize in the first place-- so we could make up and work together to get Mom and Dad back together."

"Uh oh... I smell a crazy Drake Parker scheme." Josh sighed, widening his eyes in a look of blatant fear and shaking his head.

"Oh, do you now?"

"Look, Drake, I'm only willing to do what ever it is as long as it has no connection with me throwing jelly at them." Josh said, letting go of his hand and narrowing his eyes as he crossed his arms.

Drake laughed and rolled his eyes, speaking in a re-assuring voice: "Don't worry; I haven't come up with any schemes yet."

Josh sighed and finished the sentence: "Yeah... but that's just 'yet'. Am I right?"

Drake looked out in to space for a moment with an odd grin and finally he turned back to his brother and nodded mischievously: "...Yeah. But I'll try not to involve jelly.