Chapter 36

The brunette walked through the park. She had been doing it for hours with her friend at her side. The two would just walk in silence, striking up a conversation with little meaning to the situation, as both thought about what was happening to their lives.

Neither of the girls had spoke of the events that had been so upsetting to them, but they didn't really have to. Both knew that when they were ready they would talk. It was just how they grew up, and how they were together.

Cassie was stuffed full of guilt, confusion and pain. She had never really gotten over the events that lead to so much pain in Emma's life. She blamed herself no matter what anyone told her. Her inaction caused pain throughout her family.

Emma was just confused, confused and angry. She wasn't sure what to do. She had just let the two men that she wished had been in her life from the beginning know that she existed. That she was her mother's daughter. She was lost in a world that wasn't her own. She was lost in what was left of her mother's life, what remained of her mothers past. Confusion reigned supreme in Emma's mind as she took a seat in the soft cool summer grass.

Cassie quickly plopped her bottom down next to her friend as both girls looked out over the open field before them. In front of the girls was a sight that was not helping Emma in the least. It was the middle of the summer so it was expected that children would be in the park playing. It was a beautiful sight as both girls sat watching, but it really seemed to get to Emma on this specific day. Because along with the children playing tag, hide-and-go-seek, and catch, there were mothers and fathers that played right along side.

Emma had focused in on one family in particular. They were having a picnic. The Mother was getting the food out of the basket as the Father chased a giggling little girl with bobbing pigtails, who was no more than 6 years old, around the blanket that rested in the grass. Emma watched as the father caught up to the child and swung her up into the air. The little girl giggled as she wrapped her arms around her father's neck and threw her head back as the two walked back to the blanket to eat as they had wandered quite a ways away.

Emma's eyes clouded over with tears as she watched the father set the girl down to run into her mothers open arms. All Emma could think of as she watched the scene unfold was how she never had moments like that. Sure she had her Mother, and her Uncle Max and his family, her Aunt Carly and Michael, but nothing could ever replace what she had missed out on.

She never blamed her mother, she understood her mother. She understood that it was hard for her mother to walk away, but that there were others that needed them too. Emma had made a similar choice herself many years ago. It had yet to be decided if Emma truly regretted her choices made at the age of four.

Cassie watched as a single tear ran down Emma's cheek. That was all Cassie needed to see as she wrapped her arms around her friends shoulders and hold her close. She hoped to offer some comfort to the already shaken girl. Cassie held her friend as Emma shut her eyes willing herself not to let more tears fall. She didn't want to cry. Not over them and not anymore. She had cried enough in the past for everything she didn't have and it never helped.

"They found out," Emma whimpered as she opened her eyes and watched as the little girl laughed as she shoved her sandwich in her fathers face.

"Who found what out," Cassie questioned rather lost.

"About me," Emma whispered almost worried she wouldn't be able to get the words out, "Jason and Sonny know I'm My Mom's daughter."

"What? How?"

"I jumped her in the hallway," Emma said with a light giggle.

"Jumped her," Cassie laughed as she pulled back and looked at her friend a little strangely.

"Yes," Emma laughed as a smile graced her face, "It was rather funny in the beginning."

Cassie just sat back and listened to her friend.

"I ran to my mom and she landed on Sonny. It was hilarious; I couldn't seem to stop laughing. That is until everyone decided they wanted answers." Emma stated with sadness in her voice, "Answers I wasn't ready to give. God I was so messed up, I was a wreck. I pulled a 'Do I have to" on my Mom, then I slipped up again, Jason was just silent and Sonny and Sam got all pissed at her and well Sam told me I was Jax's kid. Not that anyone really disagreed with her"

"Those asses," Cassie said as she watched more tears fall from Emma's eyes, "Who the hell do they think they are? I mean first that bitch calls you that bastards kid then she tells me to get out of her house."

"What else happened," Emma asked as she saw the hurt look in her friend's eyes.

"Well after Stan showed up Sonny sent us all upstairs and well… all the memories came flooding back, and I broke down. Michael tried to comfort me but then that little twit was all 'I'm sure it was'. God I wanted to rip her to pieces," Cassie stated rather upset and hurt as tears began to fall from her eyes.

"It wasn't your fault. None of it was, and no one will ever blame you. We were like ten or eleven when all that shit happened. I've practically forgotten about that," Emma said rather light heartedly in hopes of comforting her friend.

"Liar," Cassie said as she gave a stiff dry laugh and Emma dried her tears and the friends enveloped each other in a hug.

Cassie began to cry more tears into Emma's hair as Emma rubbed her back. Both girls had spent many a night comforting the other, from being dumped by a guy to watching a sappy movie. The girls were always there for the other, though it was only usually Cassie who cried.

Cassie took a breath and pulled back from Emma some. She sat looking at her friend. Cassie never really understood how Emma could always make her feel better. How Emma would always want others to be happy. Emma rarely thought of herself as Cassie had observed, but that was a different problem for a different day. At this point in time all Cassie was worried about was hair.

"You need a shower or something," Cassie said seriously to her friend.

"What," Emma said laughingly.

"Well you see you make a great brunette. You do really," Cassie said as she received a smirk from Emma, "But you see you make an even better blonde."

"You are so funny," Emma laughed.

"Just hear me out," Cassie said wit ha grin, "Your little charade worked when you needed it to, but now you don't need it. Everyone knows who you are, and well you can't hide it. So just be you, blonde hair and all. Plus you could scare Lila more as a blonde hair blue eyed pain in the ass."

"I'm not a pain in the ass, I'm a major brat," Emma said wit ha big grin as Cassie's phone rang.

"Darn, Where is it," Cassie said as she dug through her purse.

"Well I need to take a shower as you said," Emma responded with a laugh as she stood, "Are you going to be able to find your way to Carly's, or back to the hotel."

"Yeah," Cassie said as she dumped the contents of her purse on the grass, "I can find my way."

Emma gave a laugh as she walked away leaving Cassie to search the contents of her purse for her phone, that girl couldn't keep track of anything. Emma walked away as she played with her keys in her pocket. She felt one she had yet to use in the small town of Port Charles and figured she needed sometime alone as she walked towards the place her Mother had told her to go if Carly ever became too much for her to handle.

Cassie finally found her phone and pressing the call button brought the phone to her ear and spoke.

"Hello,"

"Hey Cassie is Emma around. She won't pick up her phone.

"No Carly, Emma just walked away. She needed space," Cassie spoke into the phone.

"Oh, Ok. Well then would you like to come over and help me with something," Carly asked.

"Sure, How do I get to your house," Cassie asked.

"Where are you?"

"The park. By the open field."

"Okay, Hang tight," Carly giggled at her choice of words, "I'll be right there to get you."

"Kay, see you soon."

"Bye sweetie," Carly replied as she hung up her phone and grabbed her car keys.

Cassie laughed at the phone as she hung it up and set it on the ground. She began to place the items from her purse back in it as she waited for Carly to get her.

Courtney had walked through the door and looked around. It was still her furniture, but it was decorated by Carly, Courtney could just tell. She stepped to the side as she shut the door. She wandered into the loft and to the back of the couch as she ran her hand against the back of the couches soft material. She walked over to the bookcase and leaned her shoulder against it and shut her eyes as the memories of her last visit to Port Charles flooded her mind.

FLASHBACK

Courtney tried to shift the weight of the sleeping four year old in her arms so that she could open the door to the loft. It was around ten in the evening and Courtney's flight had just gotten in. She had come back for her father's funeral. She had found out two days ago that he had died of a heart attack in his sleep one night. It broke her heart and she realized that Sonny was most likely suffering more than her. He had been there after all. The last five years of their father's life he had been there.

A single tear rolled down Courtney's cheek as she opened the door to the loft and set the small bag she carried down next to the door. She gently closed the door as she went to change her sleeping daughter into her jimmies and set her in the bed. She stood watching her daughter sleep for a few minutes before walking into the kitchen and saw the flashing red light on the phones answering machine.

She hit the button to play the messages as she walked over to the fridge.

"You have four new messages and no saved messages." The machine said, "Message one recorded today at eleven thirty nine am,"

"Hey Court, It's Carly. You probably knew that already, but I figured I'd tell you any way. So I got your message and I stocked the fridge and got Emma those cookies she loves. I'm not exactly sure when the funeral is, but I'll let you know when Sonny tells me. I'm so sorry Court, I'll be stopping by tomorrow, and I promise I won't tell them you're here."

Courtney let out a sigh of relief at knowing her friend wasn't going to tell a soul that she was there. She grabbed the carton of milk from the fridge as she shut the fridge door and continued to listen.

"Message two recorded today at four twenty three pm,"

"Hey Court it's me again. I thought I would let you know that you should call me when you get into town. I really want to see you. I miss you, and that little niece of mine."

She grabbed a glass and poured a cup of milk as she looked for the cookies in the cabinets. Finding them she sat herself on the counter to enjoy her snack.

"Message three recorded today at eight forty six pm,"

"Cooooooourtneyyyyyy, Pick up you phone. I miss you and I thought your plane was supposed to get in already. Uggg, Well call me when you get in."

Courtney laughed as she dunked one of the cookies in her glass of milk. Carly was so impatient.

"Message four recorded today at nine thirty three pm,"

"Fine Court, make your best friend cry. All I want to do is hear your voice. Listen to that sweet little niece of mine laugh. So call me already."

"End of messages. To delete…" The machine was cut off abruptly by the ringing of the phone.

Courtney dived for it, as she was afraid to wake the sleeping child in the other room.

"Dear God Carly it's ten thirteen in the evening and I have a sleeping child in the next room," Courtney said a bit angered.

"Well that's just great Court. Except I told you to call me when you got in," Carly said trying to sound angry but truly happy her friend was in town."

"Well I just got in, and if Emma wakes up you can come over and put her back to bed."

"Really, Well wake her up then," Carly joked.

"No," Courtney laughed, "So why'd you call?"

"Well one to talk to my best friend and two to tell you that Sonny has the funeral set up for tomorrow at three pm sharp."

Courtney sucked in a deep breath as she thought of the events that had brought her home. Her father was dead. He had died never knowing that his baby girl had a baby of her own. He had died before he could see his daughter happy, and for the most part she was. She had her daughter, a piece of him, and she was lucky to have that little girl.

"Thanks Carly," Courtney spoke weakly, "Look it's been a long flight and I need some sleep so I'll call you tomorrow."

"Yeah sure Court. Night," Was all Carly could say as she heard the hurt in her friend's voice.

"Night Carly," Courtney spoke as she hung up the phone.

Courtney took her empty milk glass to the sink and rinsed it out before she wrapped up the cookies and put them back in the cabinet. She walked over to her bag and changed into her pajamas before climbing into the bed and wrapping her arms around her little girl. Courtney feel into a light sleep with her daughter's soft snore helping to relax the tense woman.

END FLASHBACK

Emma opened the door to the loft and walked in, the first thing Emma noticed was that the place was defiantly decorated by her aunt. She walked into the loft and past the bedroom freezing as she noticed someone in the bed. Slowly Emma tip toed up to the bed and peered over the shoulder of the person hidden under the covers. Emma released a breath that she hadn't known she had been holding as she recognized the person as her mother. She slowly and quietly walked around the bed and into the bathroom. Cassie was right, Emma was really no good as a brunette, but as the natural blonde she was any sane person would run for cover. Emma was not one to mess with, just like her mother.