Note: An Elfen Lied fanfiction. Two loving parents have discovered their son is Diclonus and don't wish to destroy him, since they love him so much. They do realize that the Diclonus race is very volitale once they reach the age of reason. They are known to kill anyone and anything in their path. Sadly, the government takes the parents' son away. His name was supposed to be Haru, since he was born in the springtime, but they change it to Yukio. Yukio is tested throughougly in rather controversial and masochistic tests but never lashes out against the scientists who are molding him into a killer. He falls in love with his surrogate mother, Doctor Yumi Aoi and wants nothing more than to please her. His first mission is to find the Diclonus Lucy and destroy her, however, he cannot do it. He sees that she is happy with her family. He cannot take someone's family away from them, because he has memories of being torn from his parents. But, he wishes to redeem himself. He promises to slaughter anyone who gets in the way of research at the lab and becomes the darling of the President. He had been following orders until he discovers that his "mother" doesn't love him romantically and has been sleeping with another man other than her husband. He escapes, realizing he doesn't have to kill in order to have purpose. He reunites with his parents and meets his little brother, Zinan. Now, he is no longer alone in the world.
"If love can kill a man, surely, hatred can save him."--Altima, Noir
"I cannot atone for my past. I have killed far too many people, my hands are sullied with too much innocent blood."--Kirika , Noir
"The man within the man, the love within the love, the sin within the sin..."--Altima, Noir
Chapter 1—Unclean Hands
Ever since I was born, I knew I was different than other children. Unlike other human children, I had protuberances from my forehead, like horns. I didn't find the horns peculiar in any sense of the word, but I soon realized I was unique from everyone else by the powers I possessed. I had a feeling I had another name, but I couldn't recall that. I answered to the name the scientists gave me, "Yukio". This name sounded particularly beautiful when my surrogate mother, Doctor Yumi Aoi said it. I would do anything to appease her, including destroying anyone who came close to the laboratory. I learned quickly that I was a Diclonious, a race that had incredible psychokinetic powers. Already I had been subjected to tests I would much rather forego. At first, I didn't know how to use my "vectors", which would be my powers in semi-phyiscal form. I was hurt and bruised very seriously, but my mother Yumi always made certain I was bandaged and fed. The others didn't realize this, but I knew she loved me for what I was. Each day that went by, I felt myself falling more and more for her. I wanted to do whatever it took to be by her side, as controversial and abnormal as that was in modern society. Although, I didn't much like the stain of blood on my youthful hands or the stench of dead bodies. I had to learn to harden myself inwardly so I would no longer be bothered by killing. It was, after all, my purpose into the world which I had been brought and soon I would be commanded to my first mission. I was only 8 years old and already I was a murderer, but this thought didn't bother me. So long as I could continue seeing Yumi's gorgeous smile, it was worth unnessesary slaughter of innocent lives.
Even though some of my broken bones were mending from the tests I had underwent, I was prepared to hunt for the Diclonious Lucy. Like other Diclonious like myself, I could sense others like myself nearby or in the general vicinity. I would be released into the cruel world that I had never seen before, but I knew that this Lucy had no defense against me. I was definitely more powerful than she could ever hope to be. I had all the education I needed and I was prepared for whatever perils faced me in the upcoming battle.
Chapter 2—Hesitation
The world outside of the laboratory was unlike anything I had ever seen before. I couldn't become distracted by the beauty since I realized I had a mission to complete. Soon, my psyhic sense told me that Lucy was nearby. When I encountered her, she was with a family of human beings and another Diclonious like herself. Instantly, I had a flashback of my days as an infant.
I didn't know what had triggered these memories but I saw that my real parents had turned me over unwillingly to the government. My actual parents called me by another name, and I could hear them calling it out through the rain as the government whisked me away. My real name was "Haru", which I preferred over my given name. After I recalled being taken from them, I couldn't recall anything else. I didn't know whether they were alive or dead but then I awakened into reality. I saw Lucy giving me a cold, dark stare and I felt the hair on the back of my neck standing up. She was warning me, but she realized full well that I was one thousand times more poweful than she but she would do anything to protect her family. I felt angry with myself. Why couldn't I bring myself to lure her out, decapitate her there ? I couldn't possibly dissrupt this harmonious family. I couldn't believe the emotions I was feeling. How could I feel emotions ?
I was a cold-blooded killer ! I had no soul. I had been taught to destory anything in my path in order to reach my goal. I was enraged, and I couldn't stand it. I realized then that I couldn't kill Lucy and that I would have a lot of explaining to do when I returned to the laboratory.
Chapter 3—Castigated, Berated, and Maligned
I had been called into the office to explain I couldn't complete the task I had been given.
Instantly, the chairman of the factory had begun slapping me and punching me forcefully in the stomach. He could've used his vectors to kill me right then and there, but he didn't. He wanted me to suffer slowly, and painfully. I had already begun to bleed and my vision was becoming blurry.
"What is the matter with you, Yukio ? I gave you a simple mission and you can't even complete it ? You're a waste, not even worthy to be called Diclonious ! You're a failure !", the President said, kicking me harshly into the wall. I could feel my back crack under the pressure and I grunted out in pain. It was the most agonizing sensation I had ever felt. I had trouble getting back up to my feet, and I was becoming numb again.
"I will not fail you the next time, Sir. Whatever mission you send me on, I will complete it.", I said, finally getting back up upon my feet. I could hardly stand but I was able to maintain equilibrium.
"You're stronger than I would've thought, Yukio. But, do not forget what you have learned here. If you fail again, I will kill you. No questions asked.", the Boss said, his tone cold, unfeeling, heartless and dark. Inwardly, I shivered at his last words. The President never lied and was true to every promise he made, whether it was in writing or in speech. I knew I didn't need to upset him again. But before I could make it to my barracks, I lost unconciousness and my entire world went black.
Chapter 4—Betrayal
When I awoke my surrogate mother, Yuki was watching over me. She had bandaged my wounds and offered me water to drink in order to keep my fluids up. She reminded me that tomorrow was my ninth birthday and I was approaching the age when I was going to become an adolscent. I already knew what happened to the body as it changed. I was already growing and I healed quickly. Pain wasn't long-lasting and I had learned to block out the sensation of it altogether. Before long, I wouldn't even need to prove I could be a man and follow orders. This is what I was brought into the world for. And, oh, to see my lovely surrogate mother smile. This was my pleasure in life. If only to see her smile for a short while. It was enough to give me the affection I craved. I wanted to prove to her that I loved her deeply and I would make her proud of me, like any dilligent son would. With that, she gave me a warm kiss to my cheek and tucked me in, making sure I was warm. She left the room and turned off the light. I didn't know what tomorrow held, but whatever it as I would be ready and poised for annihilation.
It was still frigid when the morning arrived. I couldn't tell when the morning truly arrived since the laboratory had hardly, if any windows. My alarm clock was the only thing that had awakened me. I wanted to go outside and play in the snow for a while, but that was forbidden.
I had to be confined to the laboratory until a new mission was selected for me. Bored as I was, I found myself playing handball in one of the cooridores until I heard peculiar noises coming from my mother's office. Intriegued, I decided to quench my curiousity. When I opened the door to my mother's office and found her sprawled out on her office desk making passionate love to another scientist. I knew that mother was married to another, but I had no idea she was being unfaithful. My rage began to rise within me. First she had betrayed father and now me.
"Mother ! How could you ?", I screamed at the top of my lungs.
"I didn't think you'd find out, Yukio.", she confessed as her lover draped a lab coat around her naked frame. He then started to flee through the open door but I stopped him by ripping him apart with my vectors. Mother was terrified, but I had to admit she looked lovely with the splashes of blood upon her youthful face.
"You don't know who I truly am, "mother". I know who I am. I am not some marrionette with no will of my own.", I said, embittered. I could see she had already set off the silent alarm.
"Forgive me, mother...", I said, before decapitating her with my vectors. The murder I had comitted hadn't made me sorrowful or guilty in anyway, but I knew I had to run before security was going to find me. Luckily I had been able to escape and found an area where I could hide and start my quest to find my actual parents. I knew what the risks were. I would be followed non-stop but my days of bending to government will were terminated.
Chapter 5—Encountering the True Self
Discarding my old false name, Yukio, I returned to being called by my actual name, Haru. It took me three days in order to find my parents, but I had eluded the monsters who had been trying to capture me once more. I felt within my heart that they had given up looking for me. Besides, they had other Diclonious in the laboratory that were more flexible and reasonable than myself. Thus I had been forgotten altoghether, and I couldn't have been happier. At last I could atone for the unnessesary blood I had shed in the past.
My parents almost didn't recognize me, but I had never forgotten them. I remembered the musky sent of my father, Ichiro, and my mother Sayuri's soft, gentle hands. I had been introduced to my younger brother, Zinan, who was practically a newborn. I had made a complete turn in my attitude about life in general. Anger was no longer part of me, since it only produced pain. At this point, my entire life had been transformed. No longer was I the murderer, but the respected, honorable big brother I had always wanted to be.
Epilogue
Some of the horrors of my past recurred to me in nightmares but I had long since my past as nothing more than an offering made to God. I was certain God had forgiven me. I was no longer killing and I only used my vectors for good and within my family circle. Like myself, my brother Zinan was a Diclonious, but only the people within my family and he knew it. I was no longer a child at this time but now becoming a man. I was among society interacting with humans every day. I wore a hat to conceal my horns and no one thought anything of it. I had no trouble with humans, but I knew whom to trust and whom not to.
Before my eyes, my brother had become a teenager and he and I did practically everything together. Although I had to separate from him when I went to college I stayed close to him and my family. I had been able to rediscover love in the library with a beautiful human lady and we are still close to this very day. What the future holds for us, or for my brother remained in the hands of the omniscient eyes and hands of the Divine. Whatever happened, I was elated that I had such a supportive family and my beloved girlfriend by my side. I was a whole creature, no longer burdened by the sins of my checkered past. I was pure again, using my vectors only for benevolent purposes in hopes that my kind and human beings could live in peace someday.
From the journal of Haru Nagino
February 9, 2006