The beeping noises in the background were getting louder and louder. Luke made a face in his sleep and tried to shut them out, but they only became more insistent. Opening his eyes reluctantly, he squinted at the light that illuminated the room. The day was in full bloom already! He looked at the alarm, realizing that it was an hour later than they usually got up. How...?
A short beep made him turn his head and he saw Artoo at the foot of the bed.
"It was you, wasn't it? You turned it off so we could sleep some more," he stated with a little smile.
Artoo admitted it with a soft beep.
"You did right, Artoo; thank you," Luke nodded at the droid. "We needed it." He looked down at Anakin, sound asleep in his arms, totally oblivious to their conversation. "I don't want to wake him up," he muttered to himself. "He's sleeping so peacefully..." he unconsciously tightened his hold as if trying to keep his father's demons away by sheer force of will. "How will I go to sleep now knowing that for my father it is a time of horror and madness?" He let out a helpless sob. "Force, help him! I know how much destruction he caused. I know how many innocent lives he took. I know first-hand what a monster he was, and I know it is too much for it to ever be put aside as if it was of no consequence. But how will he have a life worth living if his very sanity is compromised? There must be a balance inside all of us or we will be forfeit." He cupped Anakin's head in his hand, cradling it as if it was a baby's. "Help him to find peace, or a semblance of peace at least, enough for him to carry on. Please!" He bent forward and rested his forehead on his father's, closing his eyes in fervent prayer.
A vague feeling of vertigo and dizziness came over him, and he gave a little start, opening his eyes and moving back.
Anakin's open eyes were looking back at him, just as surprised.
"W-what did you do?" the older man asked in a hoarse voice.
"I don't know," Luke replied, blinking in obvious confusion. "Did I do anything?"
"I felt as if... as if a soft breeze had brushed my soul," Anakin said, struggling to find the right words. "And it felt like you."
"Do you feel any different?" Luke asked.
Anakin looked down shyly.
"I feel loved, but I always feel loved when I'm with you, Son."
Luke felt his insides melting at that.
"I also feel rested; more rested than ever," Anakin said, tilting his head to one side.
Luke arched his eyebrows.
"Maybe it's because you've had a dreamless night," he suggested.
Anakin just stared at him knowingly.
"Seriously, Father, I don't know what happened," Luke insisted. "I felt a bit dizzy when I closed my eyes, but that was all."
"You changed something inside me. You... passed on something to me. I can feel it," Anakin said.
"Maybe it's something you needed, or will need in the future," Luke pondered.
"Whatever you did, we'll find out in its own good time," Anakin smiled at his son, holding his cheek in his palm. "Thank you, Luke. I wish I could find the words to tell you... Forgive me if I'm a burden sometimes. I..."
Luke put up his own hand and covered his father's.
"Don't you ever call yourself a burden!" he exclaimed, outraged. "Do you have any idea how empty my life would be without you? I would be lost, and lonely, and missing you with every beat of my heart! A big part of me would have died with you. It means everything to me to know that I can comfort you when you need me; that I can give back a portion of what you give me just being here with me."
Overwhelmed beyond words, Anakin held his son for all he was worth. The young man returned the hug with more intensity and need than he thought possible.
'I love you!' both minds cried out.
They remained in each other's arms until it didn't hurt to let go. Only then they moved back and looked into each other's eyes.
"Ready to face the day, General?" Luke asked.
"I am," Anakin replied.
Luke waited until his father moved off him to get up. He stretched luxuriously.
"Oh, no!" Anakin exclaimed from the other side of the bed.
The pain and loss in his voice brought Luke to his side at the double.
Anakin was looking down at his shattered Alderanian sculpture on the floor.
"Oh, Father! I'm so sorry!" Luke squeezed Anakin's shoulder.
"I must have knocked it over last night. When I woke up I couldn't remember where I was. I couldn't even remember where the lights were. I fumbled around in the dark and I remember now I heard a loud crash." Anakin looked at the irreplaceable work of art on the floor, totally devastated. A unique piece of work from a world that didn't exist anymore.
Knowing only too well what was crossing his Father's mind and heart, Luke squatted down and began picking up the pieces with the utmost care.
"Maybe it can be fixed," he offered. "It broke in a lot of pieces, but it still might be salvageable."
Anakin squatted down too beside his son. He picked up a small piece and held it in his palm reverently.
Artoo rolled up to them and beeped soothingly at Anakin.
Luke went to his father's closet and returned with a medium-sized box. He began putting the pieces in it very carefully. A few seconds later, Anakin joined him.
"I think we've got them all," Luke told his father, putting one last piece in the box and looking around to verify it.
"Yes," Anakin replied, sighing dejectedly.
Artoo beeped suddenly and rolled a couple metres, right beside the foot of the bed. He opened a hatch on his belly and extended his mechanical, pincer-like arm. He grabbed something the two humans had overlooked and handed it to Anakin.
It was undoubtedly a piece of the sculpture, but it had something attached to it. Anakin frowned and brought it closer to his eyes.
"What's that?" Luke asked, edging closer to his father.
Using his fingernail, Anakin removed the black, perfectly square object from the piece of the sculpture. It was one centimetre long, and half a centimetre thick.
The older Jedi's eyes opened like two saucers when he recognized it.
Beside him, Luke gasped out loud as he too, recognized the bugging device.
"Father..." he began.
'Shhh, be quiet!' Anakin commanded, immediately resorting to mind-speech. 'Don't say a word! I think this model only records sounds, not images. Maybe we can fool whoever are listening into believing that we didn't find it.'
Luke nodded slowly, trying to control his accelerated respiration and heartbeat.
'Since it was in the sculpture, it's logical to assume it only records sounds,' he pointed out.
Anakin nodded, smiling softly at his brilliant child. He put the device on his bedside table gingerly, just where the sculpture had been.
"Just another piece," he said out loud, for the listeners' benefit. "I hope it can be fixed now."
'We'll have to search the entire building, including our private rooms. It's obvious that there will be others,' Luke suggested.
'If we do this by the book, we might as well start talking out loud,' Anakin commented ironically.
'You're right,' Luke admitted sadly. 'We'll have to do it ourselves, but very inconspicuously.'
'And hope that none of those devices records images too,' Anakin sighed mentally.
Father and son immediately looked at each other, realizing there could be other bugging devices in the room that did record images. If that was so, then their little charade was useless.
Whatever the case, they would need a detector to find them.
'Maybe...' Luke's mind touched his father's again. '...Maybe you could try that wondrous gift of yours to locate any other bugging devices in this room, and in all others, too. Think you can do it?'
Anakin stared at his son with his mouth hanging open. It would have never occurred to him to try his gift out! Admiration poured out of him in waves.
'I don't know if I can make use of my gift for that, but I'll most certainly try, my bright one,' he answered, his chest bursting with pride in his child.
Anakin stood up and began walking around his room, looking at every piece of furniture, picture, lamp and even the floor. He tried to concentrate on his feelings, as he had done in the Falcon. He scanned every corner of his quarters, and then he entered the bathroom.
Luke watched his father curiously, wondering what it felt like to have such a gift. All of them were so fortunate that Anakin had uncovered it just in time!
Anakin came out of his bathroom and shook his head. Apparently, his search had been negative. There were no other bugging devices.
The two Jedi stood side by side, with Artoo beeping softly behind them, looking at their totally fortuitous discovery that represented a quantum leap in the conspiracy threatening the Republic.
'I guess this will convince Mon Mothma that we do have a traitor inside the Republic's core.' Luke's eyes met his father's with a look of regret. Just like all of them, he had still hoped that this was an outside menace.
'Even worse.' Anakin's eyes were haunted. 'Remember who gave me this sculpture four months ago?'
Luke's gaze turned inwards for a moment and a second later, his eyes almost popped out of their sockets. He brought up his hand and covered his own mouth, preventing himself from letting out the exclamation that wanted to escape.
'But Father, that's purely circumstantial evidence!' he tried to argue. 'The fact that he gave you this sculpture doesn't mean he...' the young Jedi's mental voice trailed off, as his father's infinitely sad eyes looked at him compassionately. The possibility was next to zero, and they both knew it.
"Well, I guess that will be all for now, gentlebeings," Mon Mothma announced, putting an end to the morning's meet. "Thank you all for your contributions and ideas. We will meet again tomorrow morning at eleven hundred hours."
Everybody agreed with curt nods, and stood up reluctantly. As usual, some gathered in small groups and left the Great Hall discussing the situation, and others stayed, talking about it among themselves.
Luke, Han and Vaughan gathered in a small group; Mon Mothma, Generals Rieekan, Ackbar and Madine in another; Captains Ylek and Thazzel and Lando in another; Anakin, Areen Worzzlek, Leia and General Dodonna in another; and Chewie and Wedge chatted animatedly in another, closer to the doors. Other members of Mon Mothma's staff, and members of the equipped team that had been assigned as Luke's personal escorts, stopped a moment to comment something to some of them and then left. Little by little, some members of the Government left, too.
Anakin nodded his head at his daughter, Areen Worzzlek and Dodonna, excusing himself, and approached his son's group. The three young men were engaged in a spirited discussion right behind him.
"Excuse me for interrupting, but I have something to ask you," he said, addressing Vaughan. "I think your family owns a restorer business, am I right?"
"My father and my uncles own the best restorer business of the entire galaxy," Vaughan nodded proudly. "If you broke something, I'll talk to them. They'll make a special price cut for you," he smiled teasingly.
"That's good to know," Anakin looked honestly relieved, "because what they'll have to restore, is something beyond price."
The sadness in Anakin's voice sobered Vaughan instantly.
"What is it?" he asked.
"Last night, fumbling in the dark, I knocked down my Alderanian sculpture." The older Jedi couldn't disguise the pain and regret in his voice.
"Oh, no! That priceless sculpture," Vaughan commiserated with Anakin. "I'm very sorry!"
"Me too," Anakin made a grimace. "If there is a chance that it can be restored, I want to try, never mind the price."
"If anyone can do it, my father and my uncles can," Vaughan reassured him emphatically. "Don't worry. I'll contact them right away." He headed for the doors.
"The sculpture's in a padded box in my quarters. Want me to give it to you?" Anakin asked, raising his voice.
"Not now. I'll go pick it up later. See ya!" The doors closed behind the young man.
"Getting clumsy in your old age, huh?" Han ribbed Anakin.
"Very funny." Luke cast a reproachful look at his friend.
"Hey, kid, if I can't tease my friends, then whom?" Han smiled naughtily.
"Too right," Anakin said, placing one hand on his son's shoulder and the other on the Corellian's, and squeezing them both warmly. "And as far as I'm concerned, the day Mr. Solo stops teasing me, that will be the day I'll start worrying."
"I don't know if I'll be able to forgive you for calling me Mister. That really hurt," Han frowned at the older Jedi.
Anakin laughed out loud.
"Bless your sense of humour, Han," he commended, gratefully. "Oh, well! I'm in dire need of some meditation. I had a restless night and it'll do me good before lunchtime."
"I'll meditate with you, Father," Luke said. "Where will you be?" he asked his friend and his sister, as she joined them, after finishing her conversation with Areen Worzzlek and patting his arm in farewell.
"The mess, of course," Han replied, watching Chewie's hungry expression as he approached them with Lando and Wedge in tow. "We'll meet you there."
"If you need us, we'll be in the Observation Hall," Luke indicated, referring to the huge room which his father, Leia and himself used to train.
"Okie-dokie." Han gave the two Jedi the thumb-up sign and a wink.
Very carefully, a dark shadow entered the Vice-President's quarters. The man beneath the brown cloak scanned the room, and his eyes settled on the padded box on the bedside table. A soft sigh escaped his lips.
With silent but now confident steps, he headed for the sleeping alcove and his gloved hands began searching the broken pieces of the Alderanian sculpture.
"I didn't think they'd send you personally, Areen," Mon Mothma's voice resounded in the chamber.
The cloaked figure gave a start and turned to the source of the voice.
Mon Mothma, Anakin and Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Princess Leia and Chewbacca came out of their hiding places and surrounded the now cornered man, caught red-handed.
The President advanced with awesome dignity, until she was face to face with the man she had considered a brother for so long.
"It is a task more appropriate for a minion than the President's confidant and trusted friend." She pinned the now slightly trembling man under her stare. "But I guess that's your rightful place, not beside me, serving the New Republic."
Areen Worzzlek swallowed audibly.
"I won't bother asking you why. The reason is obvious. Obviously petty," she spat. "That nasty, ugly feeling called jealousy. You felt displaced by a man who's worth a billion times more than you, and conspired to destroy what took us years to build up, and millions of innocent victims from both sides."
Areen's green eyes moved back and forth, from one accusing set of eyes to the next, his agitated respiration resounding in the chambers.
"Who else is involved, Areen?" The warm brown eyes flashed now with more anger than they had ever reflected. "Let's not waste any more time asking irrelevant questions, like why or what for. Time is precious and I don't want any more lives to be lost. Not even yours."
Areen's face reflected more panic than any of them had ever seen. He stepped back as if wanting to escape, but he bumped into Chewie's impressive bulk blocking his only way out. The Wookie's dangerous growl made every hair on his body stand on end.
"How many, Areen?!" Mon Mothma demanded, raising her voice.
Beads of sweat rolled down the man's forehead and his teeth began chattering.
"WHO!?" the President cried out, making him cringe.
A sudden feeling made Anakin look at the huge windows that afforded an impressive view of the capital. A small droid floated there, pointing a tiny infrared shaft at them.
"DOWN!" he yelled, grabbing his President and throwing himself to the floor with her.
Simultaneously, the doors opened and two members of Luke's personal escort burst in, blasters in hand. They opened fire.
Igniting his lightsaber and jumping to his feet, the young Jedi began deflecting blasts.
Anakin had other plans. Spurred by a memory from the past and making sure his President was safe on the floor, he jumped through the windows right after one of the deflected bolts unarmed the little droid.
"Father!" Leia cried out, seing Anakin latch onto the droid and disappearing from sight in the wink of an eye.
"Drop your weapons!" Lando ordered, barging into the Vice-President's quarters with Vaughan Worthwing and Wedge Antilles in tow, all of them also blasters in hand.
The two traitors froze, and a moment later they raised their hands in surrender.
"I said drop them!" Lando called.
The two men looked at each other knowingly and obeyed the General's order.
Something was amiss there, Luke could feel it in his blood as he turned off his lightsaber. It was too easy. He half-closed his eyes and reached out with the Force. His eyes were immediately drawn to the two men's mouths.
They had swallowed something.
"Poison! They're committing suicide!" he cried out, hurling himself at the nearest man, catching him in his arms as he fell. The other man just collapsed to the floor.
Instinctively, Luke called upon his healing gift, to no avail.
"Don't try, Luke," Lando said, after checking the second man's pulse on his neck. "They ingested SiKrah, don't you smell it?"
Sniffing softly, Luke recognized the acid smell of SiKrah, the most potent poison known to date. There was no antidote for it, and death was immediate. He bent his head over the dead body, offering a silent prayer for the two men.
Han knelt down beside his friend and squeezed his shoulder. He felt no compassion for the two traitors who'd tried to kill them all in such a cowardly fashion. But he respected and admired his friend's regard for all life, even as worthless as these.
"Areen! No, Areen!" Mon Mothma's anguished voice cried out.
The two friends rushed to their President's side, who cradled in her lap the head of a badly wounded Areen Worzzlek. He had been hit several times all over his torso. His eyes were closed and he didn't seem to breathe.
"Don't let him die. Please! Don't let him die!" she begged Luke, raising her tear-streaked face to the young Jedi in fervent plea.
Oblivious to the mayhem around her, Leia looked out of the smashed window, trying to calm down her wildly beating heart.
Anakin tried not to look down, as speeders flew past him at an impossible speed. He was hanging from the little droid, his cheeks all dragged back, hundreds of metres above the ground.
'Don't look down. Don't look down,' he told himself like a mantra. 'You followed an impulse, now's time to think. What would Obi-Wan do if he was in my place? Again?' he closed his eyes and concentrated on his feelings, shutting out the reality around him.
Then, it hit him. His newly-discovered gift.
Opening his eyes, he focused his attention on the droid, using the Force to try and change its programming, persuading it to take him back to the place it had been sent from.
A few seconds later, the little droid turned about. Anakin's eyes bulged when he realized they were returning to headquarters.
'Of course,' he nodded to himself bitterly.
The droid was moving at top speed, and seeing they were about to crash against a huge window panel, Anakin summoned the Force to break it with an impressive kick, bursting into the Great Hall feet first.
He let go of the droid, his feet touching the carpeted floor with a dull sound. He drew out his lightsaber and ignited it defensively, just in case. He projected his senses, searching the room. It was empty. Turning off his weapon and attaching it to his belt, he grabbed a knitted centre-piece off one of the decorative tables in a corner, and wrapped it around the little droid. The only fingerprints on the droid would be his, he was almost positive, but it didn't hurt to check it out.
The sun was setting when Anakin entered the Observation Hall. His eyes immediately turned to the huge windows and the impressive view of Coruscant's capital. It was a view that left him breathless. It always had and always would.
A tiny figure, looking out of the windows immediately drew his attention. Her drooping shoulders and her totally dejected stance broke his heart. He walked up to her and stopped one little step behind her. He ached to squeeze her shoulder, stroke her hair, anything. But even after so many months, he still was unsure of how to approach her, especially when she was so withdrawn into herself.
"Can I help you?" he simply asked.
"I wish you could," was the soft reply several seconds later. "But I'm afraid no one can. Not even myself, and that's the problem."
"Can I stay and keep you company then?" the older Jedi almost begged.
Leia's head turned to him, and her lips formed a poignant smile.
"I'd like that," she said, looking back ahead.
They remained in silence, looking out of the window at the life unfolding all around them. Beings with their own problems, their own lives, coming and going, living and dying...
Anakin studied his child's profile, drinking in her lovely features, so much like her mother's. Her upturned nose; her long, wavy hair; her...
"It's so ironical." Her sudden words brought him out of his enraptured reverie.
"What?" he asked.
"Everything," she said with a shrug. "Us, life..."
"In relation to what?" Anakin found it difficult to follow his daughter's convoluted train of thought sometimes.
"Trust. In the end, everything comes down to that little word, doesn't it?"
"I guess it does," Anakin agreed, beginning to see what his child was talking about.
"I've known Areen since I was 17 years old. He was kind and loyal, and with a funny sense of humour. I always liked him. War brought us all together. We formed a strange little family, but a family nonetheless." She tilted her head to one side. "After I lost my adoptive father and most of the people I loved on Alderaan, they were all the 'family' I had left. We all clung to each other. If there was one thing we could count on, it was our absolute loyalty to the Alliance and one another. Nothing and no one could break that." She looked down and sighed. "After so many years, you take many things for granted. Your friends' loyalty is beyond question, and you automatically suspect anyone who dares to question that loyalty." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, opening them next. "People change, we all know that. It's a fact of life. But if people you've trusted with your life will betray you at the turn of a hat, then..."
"...who can you trust?" father and daughter said at the same time.
"I know there are no certainties in this life," Leia went on, letting it all out now, "but I feel like such a fool! I'm angry, and disappointed. I feel..."
"Betrayed." Anakin summed it up with just one word. "Your feelings have been hurt. The betrayal of someone deeply trusted is one of the hardest lessons anyone can learn in their lifetime. Especially because there's nothing to be learned from such a lesson. You can react to it either by shutting everybody out and never fully trusting anyone again, or by keeping an open heart, and risking being betrayed again. In the end, there are only two kinds of beings, I think. Those who choose to keep on trusting others despite everything, and those who choose to build up a barrier around their hearts and live a safer but more barren life. The question is, which path will you choose?"
Leia made an ironical face.
"There are many more questions than that."
"What questions?" Anakin asked curiously.
The Princess bit her lips, as if struggling with something inside her.
"Questions like: 'I trusted Areen and he betrayed us all. 'I refused to fully open my heart to you and you saved all our lives, proving that you have more integrity and you're far more trustworthy than all the judgmental, self-righteous... like me...'" she trailed off, looking away.
"Oh, Leia." Anakin's heart went out to his beloved daughter. Unable to help himself, he reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder, squeezing it with all the love in his soul. "I wish... I just... I..."
"It's all right, Father," Leia reassured him softly, reaching up and squeezing his fingers in return. "That's why I was saying that no one can help me but myself. These questions have no answer. I have to learn to live with them without letting them interfere with my life."
"Yes," Anakin nodded. "But you're not judgmental or self-righteous. You have your own convictions and beliefs, just like all of us. It's more difficult for you to come to terms with the grey areas of life. That's the way you are. But you're intelligent, and just, and loving, and a beautiful person." He inched closer to her instinctively. "In these past few months I've come to know you, and I love you, respect you and admire you for who you are, not only because you're my daughter. You'll let go of the barriers you've built up around your heart when you realize you don't need them anymore." He risked stroking her hair once. "Areen's betrayal was a temporary setback, but you know that there are people around you who will die before betraying you or hurting your feelings intentionally. Don't let one big and painful disappointment destroy your faith in others. Trust your feelings, reach out to the Force. It will give you balance and comfort."
Leia remained silent for some time, taking in everything her father had said. She nodded slowly to herself and continued looking out of the windows.
"Do you think Areen will recover?" she finally asked.
The older man let out a bitter sigh.
"I don't know. Physically, he's completely healed; Luke made sure of that. There is no reason at all for him to be in a coma. There are no traces of poison in his system, there is no brain damage... it's as if he'd suffered such a severe trauma that he's shut himself out totally from the outside world. It's as if... as if he didn't want to return." Anakin rubbed the bridge of his nose, trying to soothe the beginnings of a monumental headache. He had tried to meditate, but he was exhausted after spending hours by Areen's bedside, trying to reach his mind with every single technique he knew, after relieving an even more exhausted Luke.
"I've never seen you trying so hard." Leia turned to him and searched her father's drawn features. "How long have you been trying to bring him back?"
"Over three hours," was the dejected answer. "Maybe I should try again. The longer he stays in a coma the more unlikely his recovery will be."
"You don't know that," Leia pointed out. "Besides, Luke is the family's official healer, not you," she smiled at him compassionately.
"I know." The Jedi's voice was full of regret and pain. "But still..."
"Still what?" Leia asked, facing her father. "What's wrong?" She looked into his eyes.
Anakin looked away, swallowing the lump in his throat. He made a move, as if beginning to walk away.
Leia immediately reached out and grabbed his wrist.
"You feel guilty!" she exclaimed, as her father's emotions flooded her through the contact.
Anakin froze on the spot and looked at her with his eyes wide open.
"You feel guilty for Areen's betrayal," the Princess stated in complete astonishment. "Why?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Anakin replied, his voice full of bitterness. "I am the reason why he turned against the Republic."
"The reason why he turned against us is exclusively his own. Nobody forced him to do it," Leia said, adamantly.
"It is not that simple and you know it. I am the living example of that," Anakin reminded her. "You just said that he was a good, kind and loyal man. He undoubtedly felt that the principles the Alliance was founded on were betrayed when I was made Vice-President. Perhaps he thought he was serving a better cause..."
"A better cause, land-mines, bombs and ambushes in public parks? A better cause, the murdering of innocent civilians?" Leia almost cried out. "Any cause that resorts to such tactics automatically loses all the credibility it could have had. They're nothing but criminals and murderers! And you know it."
"Yes, I do," Anakin replied, walking away and collapsing on one of the soft leather floor cushions. He covered his face with his hands. "But I was also the reason why a good man went astray. I can't forget that."
Leia contemplated the disconsolate figure and her heart swelled with tenderness for that man. She walked up to him and sat down beside him.
"Father, there are many reasons why a good person can go astray, but ultimately, it's their decision and no one else's," she told him in a soothing voice. "I know there are mitigating circumstances. There were in your case, and there are in Areen's. That's why it hurts so much. He's still a good, caring man. I felt it when I touched him this morning. But he allowed his feelings of envy, jealousy and resentment to lead him in the wrong direction. That's what I don't understand. He refused to trust us. He chose to withdraw and join them instead, whoever they are." She looked away with a pensive expression and shook her head with a sigh. "You mustn't blame yourself for all the bad things that happen around you, even if you were the catalyst. You're not responsible for other people's choices. You can only try to do the right thing and never hurt others intentionally, as you told me a moment ago. There is no perfect solution for every problem. There are too many factors and variables at work most of the time."
"I know, Leia. I know that in my head, but my heart tells me different." Anakin ground his teeth.
"What does your heart tell you?"
Anakin's head snapped up and looked at his daughter with utter surprise in his eyes at the eerily familiar way she had phrased her question. He blinked a few times and pulled himself together.
"It tells me that sometimes, with our best intention we can cause a lot of harm. It tells me that despite your feelings for me, everything would have turned out better if I had died on the Death Star. At least, you would have been spared this threat." He looked down and his shoulders sagged in defeat.
Leia pursed her lips, trying to control her sudden anger. She knew her father couldn't help feeling the way he did, and that calmed her down somewhat.
"First," she said in a clipped voice, "you don't know that for sure. We still don't know the true nature of this threat, and quite probably, it would have arisen anyway, whether you'd survived or not. And second, how dare you say that everything would have been better if you had died? Are you a total moron?"
Anakin looked up at her, shocked at her words.
"Can you look at me in the eyes and tell me that you honestly believe that our lives would be better if you had remained dead? That Luke would have been able to smile again the way he does every time he looks at you? Do you think that Luke and I would live fuller and happier lives without you? Not to mention Han, Lando, Chewie, and the entire Red Squadron, who admire you and respect you as if you were the coolest thing on two legs."
Anakin smiled sadly.
"You would have found a way, somehow. No one's irreplaceable."
"No, but some are more irreplaceable than others. We'd have found a way, yes. But not the best way possible. Luke would still be a great Jedi. He would have trained me right. The Republic would still be strong and just. But something would have been missing. Something only you could give us all. Yourself." Her stare intensified. "Your wisdom, your life experiences, your compassion, your understanding, your insight... everything that you are. There is a difference between good and best, and you make that difference, Father." Leia reached out and rested a hand on Anakin's shoulder. "Don't you see? You bring out the best in all of us."
"I brought out the worst in Areen," Anakin reminded them both, tears streaming quietly down his cheeks.
"Because he allowed it to. The difference lies in the way he allowed his feelings to be twisted and corrupted, instead of bothering to see how upright and decent you are now. Instead of accepting his role in the New Republic, he chose to believe he had been displaced and you were responsible for it. It's no one's fault but Areen's." Leia's voice trembled with emotion as she wiped away the tears on her father's face. "Our good deeds don't always spawn good deeds, but it doesn't have anything to do with us."
Anakin sniffled and took a deep, shaky breath.
"I know you're right, but..."
"If you still think that our lives would be better without you, you only have to look at Luke and me," Leia went on relentlessly, determined to bring her father out of his defeatist mood. "Look at the way we've grown and matured these past few months. How much we've changed, for the better. Especially me. I even consented to start training! You've taught me about my own prejudices, that were blinding me to a higher truth. I'm still halfway, but I'm trying. With your help and Luke's, one day I'll be that which I'm meant to be." Her face illuminated. "And Luke would be lost without you. He'd have looked for you in everything and everyone, wherever he went. He'd never have been able to reach his full potential as a Jedi and as a person. He'd have been empty for the rest of his life." She smiled lovingly. "And the same goes for you, Father. Luke's giving you everything you need to reach your full potential. The sight of the two of you together is awe-inspiring. You bring out the best in each other." Her look turned inwards and her voice dropped an octave. "Luke's not the greatest Jedi ever and neither are you. The two of you are the greatest Jedi ever."
"Oh, Force!" Anakin exclaimed, devastated by his daughter's words and the dawning truth in them.
"You give each other something that neither of you would be able to achieve on your own. You bring out the best in me and in all those around you who care to see. If some can't see it..." she shrugged, "...well, their loss!"
Anakin bit his lower lip. His daughter's fierce defence of him rocked him to his very soul.
"I also think there are two types of beings," Leia smiled somewhat playfully. "Those who blame themselves for every disaster that happens around them, and those who believe that they're not responsible for anything, and it's the others' fault. Truth has got to be somewhere in the middle. Most of us tend to one side of the spectrum or the other, and we spend our entire lives looking for the perfect balance."
"You and your brother are my perfect balance," Anakin whispered from the bottom of his heart. "You are everything to me..."
Leia blushed and looked away shyly.
"...and I pray that one day I can give you half of what you give me day after day, just by letting me be a part of your lives, by letting me love you, and allowing me to try and make up for my crimes. My unforgivable crimes..." he choked on his words.
Leia turned her head and looked at her father, full of compassion.
"You're doing much good, Father. You've touched thousands of lives and saved hundreds by now. The past cannot be changed, but you can change the present and the future, and you will. For the best."
Anakin's blue eyes bored into his daughter's and Leia smiled back at him.
"Bless you for saying that. It helps me so much!" he said, with an infinitely grateful smile.
"It helped me too," Leia admitted, taking a deep breath. "My conflicted feelings are still there, but I think I'll be able to cope with them better now. It felt good letting it all out and getting your insight. I guess it's useless to struggle with what it is, isn't it?"
"Quite," Anakin nodded, raising an ironical eyebrow. "But even if we can't change it, talking about it with those who care truly helps."
Leia looked down.
"Yes, it does. A lot," she agreed, keeping silent for a moment, lost in her own musings. "So," she said, coming out of her short reverie, "what do you wanna do now?"
Anakin rolled his eyes a bit, apologizing in advance for what he was going to say.
"Illogical as it may seem, I want to visit Areen again. I know there is nothing I can do, but I want to keep trying. I need it."
Leia nodded in understanding and squeezed her father's shoulder.
"I know what you mean," she smiled softly. "Thank you for your help, Father."
Anakin's gaze turned to the huge city outside. The sun had already set.
"Ah, Leia," he said with soft, dreamy eyes, "thank you for letting me try and help." His eyes settled on his daughter, adoringly. "It was..." he stiffened and his head immediately tilted to one side, as if listening to some inner voice.
"What is it?" Leia asked.
"Your brother needs me," Anakin said, standing up.
"Is he all right?" Leia got immediately serious.
"Yes. He's having a nightmare," Anakin reassured her, heading for the door. "Later!" He waved his hand good-bye, striding out of the Hall.
Leia shook her head with a smile. There was nothing more endearing to her than her father entering "Big Papa" mode. She felt a momentary pang of sadness in her heart, that also had a suspicious tinge of jealousy. But it was all her fault and she knew it. Anakin was desperate to have an equally loving relationship with both his children. It was she who still wasn't prepared to fully open her heart to him. Her fist hit the floor cushion where she was sitting in sheer frustration.
She still needed more time. She had to accept it and be patient.
There were moments... like a little while ago, at the sight of the tears rolling down his face, when she ached to wrap her arms around her father. Those sweet and gentle blue eyes broke her heart. But every time she began to reach out, she saw Darth Vader's mask looming over her as he 'interrogated' her in the first Death Star, or she had flashbacks of a badly tortured Han on Bespin, or a battered and mutilated Luke, and something inside her froze. She wanted to learn to see past those terrible episodes of her life. But those episodes, among others, had made her the person she was today. She couldn't change that.
Even so, the shy, almost fearful touch of his hand on her hair, on her shoulder, the searing love and regret that poured out of him every time she touched him... Oh, how she prayed for a day to come when her heart finally found peace!
She had to let Destiny take its course. She had gone a long way already. One day, there would be peace inside her, and she would be free of this pointless need to hold back in front of a man who would rather die than cause them all a second's pain.
She looked at the closed doors and rose to her feet. She needed her beloved's arms around her, reassuring her that everything would be all right.
She had indeed gone a long way. Now she could allow herself the freedom to be vulnerable around those she loved, knowing it wouldn't make her weak; knowing they would welcome her with open arms, loving words and a warm and soothing heart.
It was hot, very hot. He tried to breathe through the suffocating heat. He burned. He struggled to open his eyes, but his eyesight was blurry. He made out the forms of people herded around him, and he recognized them by sheer instinct rather than by what his eyes could see. His father, Han, Leia, Lando, Chewie... and he could faintly hear Artoo's beeping sounds in the background.
He was afraid. Terrified. He had never been so frightened in his entire life, but he knew he had to be strong for some reason. He blinked hard, needing desperately to see their faces.
It was so hot! And he couldn't breathe. He opened his mouth to draw a deep intake of breath, but it was useless. He wanted to cry out, to say something, but he couldn't.
And then, the unfocused faces looming above him disappeared, and he was in flames. He tried to grasp the last ray of sanity he had left, but it was hopeless. He was losing it, losing it...
"NOOO!" He cried out, sitting up on his bed with a brutal jerk. His hand fumbled in the dark, found the lights and turned them on with a slap.
He was bathed in sweat, trembling from head to foot, and he buried his face in his hands, unable to hold back the racking sobs exploding from him.
He felt a rush of air and the weight of something hollowing the bed. Instinctively, he reached out and clung to it; to him.
Long, strong arms brought him close and held him in a crushing embrace. He felt so small and insignificant, as if anything could hurt him. But he was safe now, as long as he had those arms wrapped around him.
"Father. Oh, Father!" he moaned in between gasps.
"I am here. I'm right here, little one," replied the gentlest voice, so full of love that he almost forgot why he was so terrified. "Hold on to me. It will pass, you'll see. Shhhhh." Hands stroked his back up and down soothingly. The body he was clinging to began a slow rocking motion, and he surrendered to it like a baby. Fingers slid through his soaked hair, massaging his pounding scalp and easing the splitting headache.
Luke's own body followed blindly the rhythm of his father's rocking motions, and an overwhelming sense of peace suffused his being. He swallowed hard.
"Please, don't let me go," he begged with urgent, raw need.
"Never," was the impassioned answer. Anakin's lips kissed the top of his head.
Luke returned the embrace for all he was worth, burying his face in his father's chest. This was the only place in the universe where he was truly safe, where no evil could touch him. And yet... some terrifying knowledge lurked right at the edge of his consciousness, as if trying to warn him, to force him to see...
He recoiled from that shadow and sought refuge in his father's arms. No. No! He wasn't ready for it...
"Easy, easy," Anakin murmured, rubbing his child's tense shoulders. His son's body felt about to snap, so unbelievably rigid it was. "Nothing will harm you for as long as I live. Shh, shhhh..."
They both knew it was a lie. No one could keep their loved ones from all harm. But the promise of it was so comforting that they suspended disbelief for these blissful moments when it seemed possible.
Several minutes passed thus, with Luke trembling like a leaf and his father all wrapped around him. Finally, Anakin felt Luke's body relaxing a little and his mind opening up to him.
"Can you talk about it?" he asked with a last kiss on his child's forehead.
Luke pressed up against him one last desperate time, before swallowing the lump in his throat.
"I-it was hot. All around and inside me. And I couldn't see clearly," he explained, his voice muffled against Anakin's chest. "I think you were there. And Leia, and Han and Lando, and Chewie and perhaps Artoo... but I'm not sure. Everything was so unclear... And I was slipping somehow. I was losing my mind in a burst of flames. I was burning!" He brought one hand around and grabbed a handful of the front of his father's top, burying his face in it again.
"Shhhhh," Anakin held him tight once more.
"What is this? What does it mean?" Luke moaned in anguish.
"Dreams don't have to mean something necessarily," Anakin pointed out candidly. "Most of the time, they're projections from our subconscious that we mix up with fragments of events that happened in our waking lives."
"This one looked like it should mean something. It was too vivid," Luke insisted. "It felt as if it was real."
"All dreams, and especially nightmares, feel like they are real. That's why they scare us so much," Anakin smiled, his fingers combing through the wet strands of blond hair. "I could write a study of it." He made an ironical face.
"Then, is that all it was?" Luke asked, looking up at his father trustingly, like a little boy.
"Only you can tell," the older Jedi looked down at his son, deadly serious all of a sudden, their eyes meeting in shared understanding. "Personally, I think your mind made it all up, throwing in some pieces of the nightmare I had last night."
Luke looked away, mouth open wide, realizing it just then. He nodded absently.
"I had forgotten about your nightmare." His body sagged against his father's in sheer relief.
And still, something kept nagging at him. Something he should figure out...
"I've had this nightmare before," he uttered, almost in a trance, his muscles tensing a little again. "Several times. Recently. But I forgot about it after waking up."
"Recurring nightmares are very common," Anakin said, moving a stray lock of hair away from his child's forehead. "From my own personal experience, I can tell you that if they're visions of the future, you just know. If not, they're just that. Nightmares."
"I've had those visions before and I know what you mean," Luke nodded. "But this one had something to it that was too scary to contemplate." He shuddered helplessly again and sought his father's warmth. "Are these visions literal or metaphorical?" He raised his eyes and met his father's in silent question.
"Mine have always been literal," Anakin replied, paling a bit and wrapping his arms around his son's body as a reflex action.
"Mine too," Luke nodded, cuddling up to his father's strength like a cub. "And always about terrible events."
"Just like mine." A shiver ran up and down the older Jedi's spine. "But let's not think about that now. If it was a premonition, you would know. Try to go back to sleep, my son. Everything will be all right."
"I find that hard to believe after what happened today," Luke replied, with uncharacteristic despondency.
"I know," Anakin sobered, the pain in his heart returning at the thought of Areen's betrayal. "I talked to your sister about it and she helped me a great deal."
"That's good," Luke smiled happily. It filled his soul with joy to see how the rift between his father and his sister was slowly closing. He had decided not to interfere and let things happen in their own good time. It was working.
Anakin smiled hopefully and they maintained a companionable silence for a little while.
"I tried to heal him, but..." Luke said, out of the blue.
"I know." Anakin's attention focused on easing his child's guilty feelings. "Don't blame yourself for something that is beyond your ability to heal. There must be a reason why Areen's not coming back. Keep the faith. Trust the Force."
"I saw you trying, too. For hours," Luke said softly.
Anakin made a self-deprecating face and looked away.
"I know there is nothing I can do. But I had to try, even if it was useless."
"I understand." Luke held Anakin's hand and squeezed it, pressing their palms together. To the older man, it felt as if his child's life-giving hand was blessing his own sterile flesh.
"Go to sleep now, Father. I will be all right."
Anakin was reluctant to comply with his son's wishes. But Luke wasn't a child any longer. He didn't needed his father to stay by his bedside, until he fell asleep again after having a nightmare. Never mind how close their relationship was, those times were gone for good.
Anakin nodded, burying the pain deep in his heart, and stood after mussing up his child's hair.
"Sweet dreams, my son," he smiled down at his offspring, unable to resist tucking him up.
Luke grabbed the nearest hand.
"Sweet dreams, you too. Love you." His gentle blue eyes shone.
Anakin's heart flip-flopped in his chest at the naturalness with which Luke uttered those words. His son's love. Something that couldn't be coerced or bought, freely given from that pure and innocent heart. He didn't know what had he ever done to deserve it, but it was his. The trembling Jedi wrapped that love around his own needy heart, a treasure beyond compare.
"My beautiful little angel," he whispered, the words leaving his lips before he could stop them. He turned on his heels and left his child's room.
Anakin's consciousness surfaced from the depths of slumber. As he did every single morning, he waited a few minutes until he was fully awake. Then, he opened his eyes. Tiny shafts of light filtered through the blinders and he concentrated on them, willing them open through the Force. Shining light fell directly on him, and he smiled at the feel of the sun warming his skin and filling his body with invigorating vitality.
It was time to sit up on his bed and meditate. But for some reason, he felt uncharacteristically lazy this morning. He turned onto his left side, grabbed one pillow and hugged it to his face, looking out of the huge windows.
Coruscant never rested. Life hurried at a manic speed on the other side of the glass, with ships and speeders flowing in every direction, busy and noisy, in a colourful testimony to life, to a cycle with no beginning and no end.
That was life. Some went and some stayed. Parents died and children lived, and when children became parents they left too, leaving behind them a better world - if they were clever enough - for their own children to enjoy and improve in their turn.
The circle of life.
He sighed, feeling strangely at peace that morning. He would die one day, but his children would live. The best part of him. They'd learn from their father's mistakes, and they would be wise and kind. They would use their gifts to make their neighbours' lives easier. They would fight for justice and what was right and...
Anakin's wandering mind came to a halt all of a sudden. There was something about his musings that was worth thinking over.
Anakin let go of his pillow and turned onto his back, studying the ceiling as he struggled to concentrate.
What was his subconscious trying to tell him?
He reached for the Force, looking for clues.
There was something about... Leia. His precious daughter. Something about yesterday's conversation with her made him prick up his ears, but he had forgotten about it as their talk progressed.
Anakin relived it, smiling at his mental picture of her. She reminded him so much of her mother! That long, soft brown hair; that upturned nose; those kind and lively eyes, so full of strength and determination, and so upright and honest at the same time... when she wore her heart on her sleeve, he could hardly restrain himself from crushing her to his chest. But he had to hold back. She still wasn't ready to welcome his embrace, and her rejection would break his heart beyond repair.
But he was digressing, as he always did every time he thought of his children. His beautiful and perfect...
No, not again. He had to concentrate and think of their conversation! Of all the things she had admitted. Her feelings of betrayal, disappointment and sadness. Oh, how he wished to help her! To take those feelings away and replace them with the promise of a better reality, where people meant what they said and the others didn't have to guess whether they were lying or telling the truth; or, if they were Force-sensitive, resort to...
He sat up on his bed with a start.
THAT WAS *IT*!
It had been right before their eyes all the time and they had missed it! The perfect solution, a clean and unbelievably simple way to find out who the traitors were. It was no wonder none of them had thought about it sooner. Most of the time, the things in plain sight are the most difficult to see.
He fell back on his bed, and burst out laughing.
Children indeed were the hope for the future!
"If that is all, gentlebeings, this meeting is adjourned."
Mon Mothma seemed to have aged ten years overnight. Areen's betrayal had hit too hard and she doubted she would ever recover. She tried not to look at the empty seat beside her, and at the even greater hole in her heart. She was on autopilot, carrying on with her duties. Hopefully, there would be a quantum leap in the investigation of these terrorist attacks soon, she had to hold on to that. There was a whole galaxy to protect, and her personal problems and feelings meant nothing compared to the higher scheme of things.
"Well, not quite, your Excellency," Anakin intervened, before anyone could stand up. He looked at his family and friends for a moment, asking their consent for what he was about to do, which they gave with sharp nods. "We have an annoucement to make. It has to do with the reason we arrived late to this meeting." His eyes sparkled with joy.
"What announcement?" the President asked, feeling a tiny ray of hope make its way through her broken heart. Something in Anakin's smile felt like a promise. Of what, she didn't dare to guess.
"In the middle of so much disappointment and gloom, we'd like to share with you a piece of news that, even if it's got nothing to do with our current situation, it is a promise of a brighter future for us all, besides it being an indescribable source of delight for me personally." The Jedi's eyes sparkled with untold happiness.
"Well, what is it?" Mon Mothma asked excitedly, despite herself.
Exchanging a last look with his family, Anakin took a deep breath, his chest bursting with pride.
"It is my honour to announce my daughter's engagement to General Solo."
There was a moment of shocked silence in the Hall, as everybody absorbed this totally unexpected news. But a few heartbeats later, the whole room exploded into exclamations of heartfelt congratulations to the couple, their family and their friends. Han and Leia were forced to stand up and shake everybody's hands, as they babbled clumsy words of gratitude in the spontaneous madness of the moment.
The news spread like wildfire and before lunchtime, Han and Leia's hands were sore after shaking the hands of the entire Red Squadron, Luke's personal escorts and dozens of people they didn't even know.
Luke, and most especially Anakin, couldn't hold back the happiness bubbling in their hearts. Anakin felt giddy. A mere year ago, he didn't even know he had a daughter, he was a willing slave of the Dark Side and he had nothing to look forward to in his life. Now, he was a loving and devoted father, and his little girl was engaged to the best man he could possibly imagine, who was like a second son to him.
Blinking hard to get rid of the moisture filling his eyes, he turned his head when he felt the soft brush of his son's fingers touching his own. Luke's eyes were misty too, but they were smiling up at him, his beautiful face shining with so much joy that Anakin's heart sang.
But they couldn't ignore the threat looming over them. Any or several of the smiling people shaking hands with his daughter and his soon-to-be son-in-law, could be conspiring at this very moment to bring down the New Republic, and get rid of them along with it. Yesterday had revealed two traitors in the crack team assigned to ensure Luke's security.
Anyone could be involved. That was the only, bitter truth they could count on.
The older Jedi tried to keep his mind from dwelling on the justified feeling of helplessness and betrayal settling in his chest. They couldn't allow it to prevent them from trusting people's innate goodness and integrity. Most beings in the universe were good and honourable, and tried to abide by what was morally right. They couldn't let these terribly painful acts of treachery to take away their faith in people.
Thank heavens, they had a winning card at their disposal. The Light.
The Light had ultimately defeated Darth Vader and Palpatine. Nothing and no one could stand against it. Against Love. Against their sense of belonging and determination to keep the galaxy and those they loved safe. There was no stronger instinct. They would prevail.
It was poetically fitting that it was Leia who unmasked the traitors lurking in the Republic's very core, using it to overthrow it from within, much like Palpatine had done almost a quarter of a century earlier. She was unveiling them one by one just now, just by shaking their hands and following her empathy gift. It was so beautifully simple he couldn't stop smiling.
As a young man, he'd have considered this resolution an anticlimactic one. But this was a clean and smooth way to spot and bring the traitors before justice, without shedding any blood.
Intelligence over mindless violence. Just perfect.
TO BE CONTINUED...