Disclaimer: nope...dont own it, but I wouldn't object to having snape!
Severus Snape ran through the thick trees as fast as his feet would carry him, trying as hard as he could to get away from the crime he'd committed only hours before. He wasn't sure where he was at the moment; he'd apparated several times to random locations to throw off his trail. He was alone now, having left Draco at a safe house he and Narcissa had arranged before hand. There would be no returning to the Dark Lord now, Draco would no doubt be killed for his failure, and Severus punished for making the task his own.
Why did you make me do it!
I'd never have done such a thing to you!
Severus stopped running once he found himself in a small clearing. He glanced around, hearing nothing but the sounds of the night, crickets chirping quietly and the birds softly singing. Severus then turned and slammed his fist into a tree.
How can the world seem so peaceful!
After what I had to do!
Severus continued to pound his fist in the tree again and again, after literally hundreds of Cruciatus curses; he'd learned to ignore the pain. He stopped a moment later and slumped against the tree, paying no attention to the blood stemming from his knuckles. He hated himself for what he'd done; he'd killed Albus Dumbledore, the man who gave him a second chance, the man who'd treated him like a son.
I hated to do it…it hurts so much
I didn't want to do it, the pain is too great.
But Albus had made him do it. He made him do it to save Severus's life, and to save Draco's innocence. Severus would rather have died than do the task, but Albus had not wanted the boy to be a killer, as tough as he tried to be, he wasn't a killer like his father.
Only you showed any affection,
From the others…it was nothing but hate
Sure, he'd boasted that he'd be just like Lucius, killing all the mudbloods and blood-traitors, but when it came down to it, he didn't have it in him, Severus had seen Draco at that first Death Eater meeting, he'd seen the shock and horror in his eyes as he watched a young muggle girl tortured, raped, and eventually killed. He'd put on a brave face, but Severus knew. He knew because for the briefest of moments, Draco had dropped the Occlumency shields his aunt had been teaching to him.
I wish I could save him…
The way you saved me.
It was probably too late for Draco, Potter would have no doubt found a way to make Draco seem guilty for the crime he didn't commit. Severus had failed in what he'd been trying to do, he wanted to save Draco, but the stubborn boy had refused, no doubt the only reason he wanted to complete the task was to please his father, he had no personal gain from it. Severus ran his wand along the length of his wand, though the site of it sickened him when he thought of what the wand had done. He considered briefly before putting the tip of his wand to his temple.
I could just end it here
Then I'd finally be free…
"But what of Draco?" the small voice in the back of his head echoed. The former potions master slowly lowered his wand. He couldn't do it, he couldn't just abandon Draco. True, the boy was stubborn and arrogant like his father, but he was the closest thing Snape had to a son, having seen the boy grow from a tiny stumbling toddler, to the confused young man he was now.
That's why you did it?
That's why you left me here?
Severus was slowly beginning to realize what Dumbledore wanted him to do. Albus had given Severus a second chance, and Severus was to do the same for Draco. However rather than redeem him by making up for his crimes, it was Severus's job to make sure the crimes were not committed.
I'll have to stay and protect him
To stop him from becoming his fear
Albus had known it. Albus somehow knew that Draco, in his heart, did not want to be a follower, a Death Eater, a murderer. So he had saved him, that was his task, and now the task of protecting the young Slytherin had been passed on to Severus.
"I see what you've done, Albus," Severus whispered aloud, his voice hoarse as he tried to hold back the sob that threatened to rise, "I'll do what you want, just as I've always done, I'll stay here and protect him, and make sure he doesn't make the wrong choices like I did…," he paused and ran his hand along his wand again, "but after that, after the war is over, and after I know he'll be safe, I'll finally do what I want…and that is to free myself."
Severus rose to his feet, and with a quick wave of his wand, cleared the mess from his blood-stained knuckles. He had something to do now, even without being in the ranks, he could still get information on the Death Eaters, and he needed to be able to find a new, safer place for Draco to hide. He needed to protect him.