Next time we walk
Disclaimer: Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Aragorn, Gandalf, and Boromir are still up for sale! Get your fellowship members while they last! The ideas are all mine! Enjoy!
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Legolas and Aragorn return to the furniture store, where the hobbits are still watching American football.
"I found Aragorn." Legolas announced as he and Aragorn entered the store. The hobbits said nothing, their eyes still glued to the screen. "Hobbits?" Legolas asked uncertainly.
Just then a touchdown was made and the hobbits jump up screaming, startling the Elf and the ranger.
"YAY! THEY DID IT! WE WON!" Pippin and Merry shouted, doing a victory dance.
"!$ our team lost." Frodo muttered, kicking his beer bottle across the room.
"Let's get out of here Mr. Frodo." Sam said while shooting dark looks at Merry and Pippin.
Frodo and Sam left, both looking extremely grumpy.
"There you guys are." Merry said after the victory dance was complete. "We've been waiting."
"So now where are we going?" Pippin asked, his face full of curiousity.
Merry shrugged. "Don't ask me. Aragorn is the leader."
Legolas felt annoyed. After all, he was the eldest. "Since when?"
Merry and Pippin looked at each other, then shrugged. "I don't know."
Aragorn raised an eyebrow. "Do you doubt my word Legolas?" He asked in a dangerous voice.
"After you drank that stuff?" Legolas nodded. "Yes."
While he was nodding, Pippin noticed a package in the Elf's hand. "What's that you got there Legolas?"
Legolas put the bookmarks behind his back and took three steps backwards. "Nothing..."
Aragorn struck a dramatic pose. "ATTACK!" He shouted, pointing at Legolas.
Merry and Pippin jumped on top of Legolas and Aragorn got the bookmarks. Ignoring Legolas's pleas and cries for help, he opened the package and flipped through the bookmarks. "Only of you? What's your problem you dumb Elf?"
"I can't breathe." Legolas gasped, his face turning blue. "I'm dying...good bye..."
Aragorn ripped up the bookmarks in disgust. "Those were junk anyway. Come on. Let's go."
Merry and Pippin got off of Legolas and he stood up. His eyes lit upon the torn up fragements of himself and anger began to build inside of him. "You ripped me up." He muttered quietly.
"Hmm?" Asked Aragorn, who was being distracted by a couple of women walking past.
"YOU RIPPED ME UP!." Legolas roared. He lunged for Aragorn. "YOU MUST DIE!"
"What? OMG!" Aragorn reliazed at the last possible second that the Elf was coming for him. He dodged the attack and began to run.
Legolas got to his feet and struck a dramatic pose. "ATTACK HIM!" He yelled before running after Aragorn, who had run into Sears.
"Boy, he sure is mad." Merry noted, watching the pair recede into the distance.
"I hope Aragorn knows a good hiding place." Pippin agreed before the two hobbits ran after the Elf and the ranger.
They walk into the women's bathing suit department. aragorn is standing with some plastic models that are on display. He was a pink Hawaiian print bikini on for a disguise.
"Look at that ugly human." Merry said, pointing at Aragorn. Aragorn's nose twitched, but since Legolas was stalking around in the general area, he couldn't move.
"I like what she's wearing though." Pippin noted, then looked around. "I want some."
Merry began to search too and spotted the women's lingerie department. "Look! There's some!"
Merry and Pippin put on the women's lingerie and then resume their search for Legolas. They find him stalking around in the home appliance section looking for Aragorn. As soon as he saw them approaching, he stopped and stared, looking horrified. "What the heck are you wearing?"
"I don't know." Merry struck a pose. "Aren't they fashionable?"
Legolas began to back away, his eyes wide. "Get away from me! I don't know you!"
"Yes you do. I'm Pippin, remember?" Pippin asked as the hobbits advanced on the terrified Elf.
"No!" Legolas threw his hands up in front of his face. "Stay away!"
The hobbits did not stop their advance on Legolas. "Legolas?" Merry asked, trying to get through to the Elf. "Hello?"
Legolas suddenly snapped. He seized Pippin. "No! I will not be captured!" Ignoring the hobbits cries, he tossed Pippin into a washer, slamming the lid shut. He then rounded on Merry and flung him into a refrigerator. He looked around quickly, then casually walked away and resumed his search for Aragorn. His search led him into the shoe department.
Legolas heard footsteps behind him, then a voice he hoped he would never hear again. "Hey Legolas."
Legolas turned around and found himself face to face with Frodo, who was wearing stilletos. The Elf raised an eyebrow. "What are you wearing?"
Frodo shrugged, then struck a pose. "I don't know. Aren't they fashionable?"
"No. Leave me alone." He walked away, but Frodo insisted on following him.
"What's wrong?" Frodo asked, his blue eyes full of concern.
Legolas finally snapped. "Stop following me!" He yelled before picking him up and slamming him into the ground. Frodo tried to move but his heels were stuck in the floor.
"Help me Sam!" The hobbit cried, struggling to move his feet.
Legolas threw back his head and laughed evilly. "No one can help you now!"
A lone figure charged from the women's purse department into Legolas, knocking him to the ground. Legolas blinked in surprise and then winced as the figure began to whack him with a purse.
"You...hit...Mr...Frodo...die...stupid...Elf..." Sam screamed, beating Legolas over the head with the purse without mercy.
Legolas cocked his head as if he were listening. "Is that someone I hear giving away free food?"
Sam hopped off Legolas and looked around, his face eager. "What? Where?"
Legolas jumped to his feet and knocked Sam out with a shoebox. He left Frodo standing over Sam's body, then headed up the escalator. He wandered into the bedroom department. There he found Gandalf asleep in a bed designed for children.
"Gandalf!" Legolas muttered, shaking the wizard's shoulder. "Wake up."
Gandalf woke up and blinked in confusion. "Where am I?"
Legolas shrugged. "I don't know."
Gandalf looked around, his eyes blurry. "Is this the Halls of Mandos?"
Legolas shook his head violently. "Definately not. Have you seen Aragorn?"
There was a pause as Gandalf thought about it. "No." He said finally, shaking his head.
"Go back to sleep then." Legolas commanded before going after Aragorn again. He wandered into the houseware section of the mall, where he found Aragorn trying to hide and failing.
Legolas seized a frying pan from a nearby shelf. "YOU RIPPED ME UP! DIE!"
Legolas whacked Aragorn over the head with the frying pan and Aragorn fell to the ground. Legolas placed the pan back on to the shelf, then helped Aragorn to his feet. "Let's get out of here."
Aragorn nodded, then looked confused. "Wait, what about Merry and Pippin?"
Legolas shurgged. "I left them somewhere where I would remember them. Come on."
The duo walked back to the appliance section and let Merry out of the refrigerator and Pippin out of the washer.
"Aragorn! You're alive!" Pippin gasped, his eyes round with amazement.
"Of course he's alive." Legolas snapped. "Why wouldn't he be? Now take those ridiculous things off and let's get out of here."
"Quickly." Aragorn added, before the hobbits ran off to change.
After several hours the fellowship made it out of the mall and wandered back to the subway, where they boarded a train.
"Finally, we're headed home." Legolas sighed as the train pulled away from the station, leaving New York far behind them.
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So there you have it. Next chapter up! Finally...took me long enough...but anyway, I'm sorry but I won't be able to post my reviewers at the bottom of the page anymore, apparently its against the rules or something, but once you review, I will give you your just desserts! Or whatever that saying is...
But don't worry, this is NOT the end of the story! There's more chapters to come! So keep reading, its not over yet!
Please review! Thankies!