James stared at her feeble body lay next to him sound asleep, pressed against his chest and her breath was lovely like music and the warmth that came from her was enough for him to be warm for a lifetime. He stared at the way her lips were slightly opened and the way she held on to the blanket like it was security, like she might fly away soon and she needed to hold on to something solid.

For so long Lily had been his security blanket, for so long and then for it to be taken away in a heart beat can shatter your world in two. He had to learn to stand on his two feet without being dependant on anyone, to stay strong, to stay alert, without distractions or warmth. He had to separate himself; he had to set himself apart from the rest. He had to grow up and stop being so naïve about the world around him. He had to stop showing off and had to stop clowning around. He had to grow up. He had to learn to ignore and not get close to anyone. He felt vulnerable and afraid, he stared at her closely, and how could someone so beautiful hurt him? It couldn't be so…Lily would never hurt him, but truth was, he didn't know Lily anymore. All she was was a memory; she didn't look the same so how could he know if she acted the same? For all he knew she was a completely different person. He didn't want to let go of the person he remembered her to be, because the person he remembered was beautiful and alive and the Lily he saw before him looked worn and broken. Then again…

He was also a different person since Hogwarts, he was so naïve and cheerful and happy and now he was a bitter worn out human being who was making a fool out of himself in his mind.

He shifted his weight and stood up; he paced around for a bit and then covered his mouth in thought.

"You think she can make you happy James?" Someone snarled from behind him. He turned around covering himself with a blanket. It was Marie, her eyes with glaze and she stared at him like a numb, thoughtless zombie. For a split second he almost felt sorry for her. "You think she loves you James? She doesn't even know you anymore…not like I know you." It was like she was reading all his worries and saying them out loud. It scared him.

James edged nearer to her and placed a hand on her face, it was wet from tears, "Marie, I lied to you when I first met you. I led you to believe I was happy, but I wasn't. I haven't been the whole time I've been with you. I'm sorry."

"Look at her James, she's a child. She needs to mature. She doesn't know anything about you anymore. She's a stranger and you want to throw all of this away for a stranger?"

He gave her a small smile and stared proudly at the woman sleeping on his bed, "Well it's up to me to find out."

"Don't be foolish James." She snarled at him.

"Marie, nothing has changed. Everything I told you yesterday I stand by. I have no regrets."

"Yet."

"Ever."

"Oh James, I'll make you regret it." Marie stared dead into his eyes and backed away from him and a 'pop' and she was gone.

"Crazy slag." He sighed and stared out the window. The weather was beautiful. He went back to his bed and brushed his lips against her smooth skin. He heard her shift and her eyes fluttered open to reveal two big emerald eyes staring back at him.

She looked flushed, she raised the blanket to cover all but her eyes, and she stared at him, confused. He stared at her back; she was so breathtaking it was ridiculous.

"Hi…" He started and edged a hand towards her; it broke his heart to admit that she flinched.

"Hey…" She stood up, covering herself up a bit more. She stuck her hand out and then said, "I'm Lily."

He started at her bewildered, "Hi Lily…Do I have to go along with this too?" She nodded. "I'm James." He stared at her, was this her? Was this really her? "Are you really Lily?"

She looked taken aback, she covered herself up a bit more again, "Shouldn't you know? Can't you tell? Wouldn't you know?"

James cursed himself silently for startling her, "I just can't believe it's you…It's been so long…I mean—I would hate it if it ended up being another," He strained to say the word, "fake."

Lily placed a hand on his knee, "James, before yesterday, I had no recollection of you or my past at all, so I don't think I know how you're feeling exactly, but yesterday when I saw you—when I touched you—everything fell into place. I don't regret anything we did yesterday but…"

He placed a finger on her lips, "Shh… Don't say anything. I'm going to go, for a while. When I come back, we can go out and get some tea and we can talk."

"You're leaving?" She said in a small voice that made him go weak in the knees.

He added hastily, "If you want, I can stay."

"I'd like that," she said with a smile.

After they both got dressed they sat on his bed and just stared at every place but their eyes.

"So how's Ash?" Lily said her face pale.

"Good, from what I hear engaged." He said. He looked at her body, should he touch her? Could he touch her? Would he hurt her? Would she hurt him? Did she realize how in love with her he's been?

"Wow…" She let out a sigh. Her eyes were glazed over. "I've really disappeared for a while, haven't I? Missed out on quite a bit."

"Don't worry Lily; you'll be updated soon enough. I reckon it'll be like you never left," he made eye contact, "maybe even better."

She gave him a weak smile and took a sip of tea, "Maybe…" Her eyes lit up. Everything seemed to make sense. "Remus! Why isn't he with Annabelle, what happened? I remember him mentioning something about her…I just can't remember what. Ha, I'll never get a hang of my memory."

James sighed and rubbed his temple, "Well…it all started when Remus came with us, to France, after your disappearance." He swallowed, the memory pained him. "Well when he got here, we got news that she had caught something deadly from one of the Death Eaters. Tried to get her parents to become Death Eaters and when they refused, they went into hiding but before doing so, someone slipped Annabelle something and it ended up poisoning her. She's been getting sicker and sicker ever since. Remus never had the nerve to visit her. At first he kept putting it off, and months turned into years and he just never went. I think he's too ashamed to go now, with all the time lost. She's going to die though, reckon it's something painful too. Wormtail visits her every so often. Bloody horrible." He finished bluntly.

Lily put her hand on her mouth, she remembered Annabelle, she was a prefect and she was very prestigious, "That's horrible! No wonder Remus…he must be heartbroken…she must be—this is so horrible."

"That reminds me, about that kiss—("He kissed me! I swear.") I hope so." James said, smiling at her.

Lily became very quiet and still, "How come you never came back to London? How come you never looked for me? It wasn't over for me! I've been alone all this time!"

James stared her amazed, "Are you seriously asking this? Are you really asking this?" She nodded. "I didn't know you lost your bloody memory! I thought you would have written. I did look; I looked for years, ask Sirius and Remus. I never gave up. It wasn't over for me. I had horrible dreams, they made me see shrinks. There has not been one day Lily that I never thought about you. I thought you knew where I was…"

Lily stared at him, "Then why didn't you just declare me dead?"

"I—I—I didn't want to think about that," James said in a low voice, "I would have blamed myself and then my life would have been even more miserable then it already has been."

"You could have continued with your life, James. I was only your friend." Lily said in a voice as loud as a whisper.

James stared at her, "How could you say that? After yesterday…I reckoned you got the message." She continued staring at him. "I love you Lily, I always have."

She shook her head, this was not the impact that he was hoping for; "Don't you use that silly word. That's ridiculous. You loved me, the old me. You don't know if you love the person I've become, you don't know if you love Flower."

James winced, his heart was too weak for this, "I see. Lily, did you love me?"

"I loved you very much." She answered, looking down. Her face was blushing. "If things would have been different…"

"I know." He said bitterly. "I know."

"You have got to bee joking." Ava hissed at Sirius, arms folded across her chest, while a ginger haired girl sat next to her with the same sour look on her face.

"That's what I thought…but it's her alright." Sirius said leaning against the wall looking at her through his dark eyes.

"James saw her?" asked the ginger haired girl directly. She looked uncomfortable, as well did Sirius when he looked directly at her. He nodded slowly, "And he's convinced it's her?"

"It is her. And yes, he is. Although I did leave after he looked at her…It was touching." Sirius said looking down. "I remember when we were in school…he never admitted it and I never asked him…it was just so obvious. These days can really harm you…"

The ginger haired girl scoffed, "I don't remember you much of a sentiment Sirius."

Sirius shot her a filthy look and replied in a slow dangerous dark voice, "Today isn't about you or me, Ashtyn. Nor is it about the horrible person I was during school. It's about James, my best mate, and Lily, the girl he was in love with for eternity; or have you forgotten about your best mate?"

The gingered hair girl named Ashtyn looked livid and her face was a deep red, "No, I haven't."

Ava cleared her throat and continued, "So let's say this woman is her, how is she? Does she remember everything?"

"She seems to remember everything about her and James, her family and a bit other things. She still needs help to recall everything."

"How convenient." Ava replied skeptically. "Well, we'll know if it's her when we see her." Sirius nodded in agreement. "So where's Remus?" She asked eagerly. "I haven't seen him since that day he mysteriously appeared at your house…"

"I don't know, probably off somewhere moping." He shrugged nonchalantly. "You know…hasn't been the same. Who can blame him? It's not exactly like we're all the same since school."

"No, we're not, sadly." Ava said with a small smile.

"So how are the weddings plans coming along?" Sirius asked the gingered hair girl in a fake mocking voice.

"Just fine." She answered dangerously.

"Show him the ring, Ash." Ava said excitedly.

Ash shot her a dangerous look and stuck out her hand annoyed, "See?"

"Isn't it beautiful?"

Sirius scoffed at it, "Surprises me how someone with such a free spirit could tie their selves down to one person."

"Yes Sirius, that happens to be one concept you never seemed to understand. One person to one person." She shot back at him bitterly. "And I thought today wasn't about how much of a bloody wanker you were back at school?"

Sirius stared at her darkly, "Tell that bloke what a lucky man he is." He apparated away.

"No good—frapping—always getting the best of me—thinks she's so bloody smart—ARG!" He accidentally knocked over a table with his leg.

"I hope I'm not interrupting you're ranting." Remus said, with a strangely wide smile on his face. "What's up mate?"

"I just came back from Ash's place, Ava was there." He said grumpily, giving him a look. "She asked about you."

"Hm, that's nice of her." He didn't seem slightly interested. "What happened?"

"Nothing!" He snapped. "Why would something happen? Nothing happened." Remus continued to stare at him. "She happened! She thinks she can still treat me like she did at Hogwarts, like I'm some wanker who doesn't think from the head on his shoulders—she doesn't even know me!"

Remus sighed, "We know you're a good person mate, she doesn't know what she's talking about." It almost sounded recited, since he almost always had to tell Sirius this during Hogwarts.

Sirius shot him a dirty look, "So what's with that ugly smile I saw you with earlier?"

"Oh that," He grinned again and gave a little blush, "It's nothing."

"You better tell me but first I have to tell you something." Sirius' face suddenly became blank and unreadable. "That was Lily. Yeah Flower was Lily. I took her to James while you were passed out on the couch. Ha, I bet Prongs isn't too happy about that kiss." He smirked.

Remus' smile flickered and he suddenly looked like he was deep in thought but that was gone as soon as it happened, "So that was her?" He felt slightly smug about being able to kiss her before James could. I mean she was one of his first girlfriends… "That's good. I'm happy for him."

"Now tell me why you're smiling." Sirius demanded.

Remus smiled again, "I went to go visit her, Padfoot. I saw her again." He didn't even need to say her name, Sirius already knew to whom he was referring to.

"Annabelle? Annabelle Lee? You saw her?" Sirius said in awe. "Wow. Please tell me you didn't quote Edgar Allen Poe to her again?"

Remus shot him a look, "I didn't and let me tell you, she enjoyed it when I did."

He rolled his eyes, "Corny and cliché."

Remus smiled and just thought how moments ago…he was with the woman he almost let get away…he was at bliss and if it wasn't for the nurse and her guidance he wouldn't have left.

"You know what would be weird if you told me that and then I went, 'Annabelle Lee died three days ago', and wouldn't that be spooky?"

"You are such a fruit." Remus said walking away.

Sirius yelled back, "I prefer to be called an apple. Do me a favor, check up on Holly for me."

"Remember the time, when you were convinced that Snape had a good heart." James said as if it was the most ridiculous information he had ever heard.

Lily laughed, which made James smile because he had always thought her laugh was beautiful, "I still think that. He was never bad James; you never gave him the chance."

"I had my reasons." He said, shrugging. He felt so comfortable talking to her, like old times.

"You were so mean to him James, really, you and Sirius both." Lily said shaking her head.

"Pch, whatever." James said, sounding very much like he used to.

For hours, they spent talking about memories and making each other laugh. Throwing Bertie Botts back and forth, trying to land them in each others mouths. They were hanging out as friends with no romantic feelings in between. They even played hide-and-seek for a while until Lily laughed so hard that pumpkin juice flew out her nose.

"Look, it's the sunset." James said, holding his stomach from laughing.

"Don't be silly, I don't want to look at it. I want to keep hanging out, I might have to leave soon."

"Leave?" James said suddenly, like the word was foreign.

Lily nodded, "I have work, James, I have my life in London, my friend Heather—she doesn't even know my memories back, I have to write to Ash and Star! I forgot Star." And she went on and on, listing reasons on why she had to leave him.

"So that's it then?" He asked, stung. "We haven't seen each other for years and now you're going to leave after a day of hanging out and after last night?"

"Don't be dramatic. I'll be back." She said smiling. "I have to work though, my life isn't here like yours is."

He nodded sadly.

She stared at him, "Are you staying here?" He nodded. "You don't want to come back with me to London?" He hesitated and shook his head slightly. "Why not?" He shrugged. "Are you not going to talk to me?"

"I am..."

"Don't be like this, c'mon, let's look at the sunset." She said, she grab hold of his hand and lend him outside his door. She sat on the porch and patted the ground next to her, signaling for him to sit down. She started humming a Frank Sinatra song that she remembered James loved.

He smiled.

"The boat rides we would take, the moonlight on the lake. The way we danced and hummed our fav'rite song. The things we did last summer I'll remember all winter long." He sang below his breath. They smiled as they touched knees, like two teenagers they smiled and blushed.

"You know something; I think I might have that song." James stood and opened the door for Lily; she walked in, giving him a gracious smile. "Wait here."

He walked away and came back holding an old record player and a record that said, "Frank Sinatra."

"It was my dads, he loved him. Loved him. Played it all the time when I was young. This very same record, little did I know, he left it to me." He gave a small smile.

"Put it on." Lily said encouragingly.

He did so.

The boat rides we would take, the moonlight on the lake

The way we danced and hummed our fav'rite song

The things we did last summer I'll remember all winter long

The midway and the fun, the kewpie dolls we won

The bell I rang to prove that I was strong

The things we did last summer I'll remember all winter long

"Dance with me?" He said bashfully, holding out his hand, remembering how his dad would do this to his mum. It used to make his mum so happy. She nodded and took his hand, smiling a small yet very meaningful smile to him. He held her close and smelled the lavender radiating from her hair. Her brown hair that made him frown.

The early morning hike, the rented tandem bike

The lunches that we used to pack

We never could explain that sudden summer rain

The looks we got when we got back

The leaves began to fade like promises we made

How could a love that seemed so right go wrong?

The things we did last summer I'll remember all winter long

He dipped her, just like his father would do, graceful yet with sly style. She giggled.

"Smooth, James."

I've tried so to forget, at times I do, and yet

The mem'ry of you lingers like our song

The things we did last summer, I'll remember all winter long

Lily smiled and heaved a sigh, "That was fun."

James smile flickered, "You have to leave now, huh? The suns gone."

Lily looked outside, "I'm afraid so and if it's not so much, can you take me?"

For a split second, he wanted to say no, so she would stay but he rather let her go gently then her leaving without a chance of never coming back.

"Sure."

"I hate apparating." She shuddered. They stood in front of Sirius' house, she looked up at him and gave him a kiss on the cheek and a big hug. "See you soon?"

"We'll see." He said, giving her a small smile. "Here you go." He pulled open her hand and put the small music box in her hand. She stared at it, it still had the same gleam and touch it had when she first saw it.

"Thank you."

A/N-NOT OVER YET! I am so tired. With the writing of Behind the Prince and Finding Lily still here, my fingers are exhausted. Please give Behind the Prince a chance and please comment it. Sigh. Much love. 3