"Jude, you need to stop running away when things get rough, what's going to happen when your marriage gets rough, are you going to run then too?" he said with sadness in his eyes.

"No, you see, Tommy, my marriage wont be rocky because he wont break my heart as much as you have." she didn't meant for it to sound as cold as it did, but what could she do.

"Jude, come on, that was the past. I am standing here telling you that will never do that again, just please, don't leave." he sat there looking like tears were forming in his deep blue eyes.

help me realize

just exactly what I'm looking forward to

when I look

into your eyes

This was enough, Jude got up and walked out of the kitchen and almost out of the front door when Tommy went and grabbed her arm.

"Where are you going?" he said eagerly.

"Away, from you. I cant handle this right now Tommy. I just can't." She was fighting back the tears that were forming in her eyes.

"Jude, you can. You have to. Look, I know how much I hurt you. And I know how terrible it was for both of us to be away from each other the past four years. But we still have to try and make things work. For us, girl." she looked at him and then looked away again. Eye contact with him was practically killing her right now.

"Tommy, I just- can't do this right now. I'm sorry." he grabbed her arm a little tighter.

"No, I wont have you walk out the door without telling me how you really feel. I'm sick of you telling me 'not now'. It has to be right now. Tell me, Jude. Tell me you don't love me. Lie to me." he pulled her close to him so that his eyes were mere inches from hers.

why do I fall so hard

and they don't fall back

tell me what it is

that I still lack

"I-I….uh…" she trailed off again remembering back when she was sure what she wanted to do.

Flashback

She went to make herself a sandwich in the kitchen when she stumbled across a letter on the counter addressed to Sadie from Tommy. She couldn't help but open it. It read…

Dear Sadie,

I know things haven't been the greatest lately, but I promise, they will get better. Just remember, I'm here for you, always. I am really excited about our trip to Europe. I am so glad you invited me. I really need to get out, I need time to, think about things. And I need to get away from some things. Well, I will talk to you later. And I am looking forward so seeing you tonight. Until then…

Love,

Tommy

"Oh, well isn't that just fantastic. He means he needs to get away from me. That bastard. Well, if he wants to get away from me, then I will get away too. Screw him, wait, that will be Sadie's job." she scoffed and ran upstairs to gather her things.

End Flashback

Her face became stiff and she remembered why she left again. It wasn't because of Sadie or Tommy. It was the fact that she could lose him at any second to anyone. This made her wonder why should she even try if he just up and got with her sister behind her back, would he do the same in life? She couldn't tell him how she really felt.

"Jude? Say it. Say you don't love me! You cant say it, can you?" he was shaking her now.

"Tommy! I- I don't love you!" she sighed. God, I love you, Tommy! I missed you so much. He stopped shaking her and just looked blankly at her. He didn't really think she would say that.

"Well…I uh…" he couldn't speak. He felt the same as he did when he saw her for the first time in four years. Speechless. He walked out the door and didn't look back. She followed him.

"Tommy, where are you going?" he didn't even turn around to speak to her.

"Thanks for lying to me." and with that he was gone.

Jude collapsed on the front porch crying. How could I let the one person in the whole world that I loved and cared for the most, think I didn't love them? What kind of monster am I? She didn't know what to do or even if there was anything left to do. She was alone, once again.

But sometimes when you get tired of running, and try to go home, there's nobody there. So you're left alone.

Thanks you guys for all your reviews. That was awesome. You showed me you do really like the story and that I should continue it. If you have any suggestions, I'm open to comments of all kinds. Please read and review. Happy Holidays!