Caught
Things started to get a little serious between Draco and I. We were going at it on the couch in my room one night. It was getting pretty hot and heavy. Draco kept sliding his hands under my waistband, pushing farther than he had before, and I kept pushing him back. It all felt so good, and I would feel myself forgetting, slipping, and losing myself it.
I looked up.
""Just friends, right?""
He smiled, ""friends.""
The passion was escalating , and he started to undo my pants.
""No,"" I said, grabbing his hand as he tried to unsnap my jeans, ""this is not a god idea.""
""Why not?"" His voice was muffled.
""You know why not,"" I said.
""No, I don't.""
""Draco.""
""What's the big deal?" he asked me, rolling over onto his back, his head by my leg. His shirt was unbuttoned; one hand was still on my stomach, fingers stretched across my skin. "The big deal is… it's just not a good idea."" I said, reaching over and turning on the light. No one had ever slid their hand further than my neck, no one had ever found ingenious ways to get places I was trying so zealously to guard.
""Hermione," he said, his voice low. "I'm into being patient and waiting and all, but it's been almost three months now.""
""That's not that long,"" I said picking at the pillow.
""It is to me."" He rolled a little closer, putting his head in my lap. I had a sudden flash, out of nowhere, that he had done this before. ""Just think about it, okay? We'll be careful, I promise.""
""I do think about it,"" I said running my fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes. And I did think about it, all the time. But each time I was tempted, each time I wanted to give up my defense and pull back my troops, I thought of Ginny. Of course I thought of Ginny. She'd thought she was being careful, too.
Just then, Ginny walked in, and caught us in that awkward position.
"Hermione, oh, sorry, I'll just wait outside, I just wanted to talk."
He kissed me goodbye and left, and I stood in my open door and watched him go, waving like he always did as he reached the corner.
As I lost sight of him, I thought of that sketched black outline, the colours inside just beginning to get filled in. The girl I'd been, the girl I was. I told myself the change had come fast and furious these last few months, and one more wasn't that big of deal. But each time I did I thought of Ginny, always Ginny, and that new colour , that particular shade, which I wasn't ready to take on just yet.
Something was changing, something I could sense even though I'd never been there before, like the way baby turtles know to go to the water at birth, instinctively. They just know. And I already knew I'd lose Draco, probably soon, if I didn't sleep with him.
I turned to Ginny and we went inside. Praying on the way in that the incident wouldn't be brought up.