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Of Ramen and Wooden Skates
Wooden Skates
"Jiraiya was too happy when I told him he could live with me temporarily in my apartment. Too happy in fact, that I grew worried in spite of myself. You see, sir, he has this kind of smile that when it surfaces on his face, you can be sure that there would be some kind of catastrophe heading your way.
"The first problem was where he could sleep. The room I was currently staying in was only enough for one occupant, and my place was crammed by my stuff and scrolls and books. I'm fond of scrolls and books, nothing more relaxing than reading up on new jutsus after a hard day of work and training. When Jiraiya arrived, I was shocked at the amount of stuff he had with him. He took everything he owned. We were going to be smooshed like sardines.
"I tried to solve the problem by packing up the things that were ready to be packed – I had sudden bouts of laziness sometimes, myself. Jiraiya helped me put away my things – luckily he also brought along his own futon – and soon we could somehow fit inside my cramped space. He had no idea when he could find a new apartment with a lower rent. That was one of the harder things to find in Konoha these days, I'm sure you know.
"My little apartment was way noisier now that Jiraiya was staying with me. He complained even with the tiniest things – from the brand of tissue paper I use to the little trinkets I hung by my curtain. I glowered at him and thwapped him smartly at the back of his head, reminding him that he had a roof above his empty head because of my own kindness. That was usually enough to quiet him down.
"I told Jiraiya that he had to do his share of the housework. Since I woke up early, breakfast and dinner was mine. He'd have to clean the place and keep it that way until he left. I did this partly because I wanted to spite him – Jiraiya did not like cleaning.
"During our free time at night we regaled each other with stories that sooner or later would end in a minor fistfight. We never could go to sleep without making each other's nose bleed. Somehow I thought I needed to help him find a new house. I would DIE if he continued to live with me.
"Jiraiya was not really useless, though. He was the one who suggested that I should use skates as I worked here. I told him I didn't know how to make skates, and at that moment he went out and bought some things and made a pair for me. These skates are the ones he made. I think they're nice too – they're light and easy to balance on. I sure hope Jiraiya is like that at all times.
"But then there was this time when he came home with a black eye. I didn't need to ask because he worked as a clean-up boy in the public bath at the next street. And I even patched him up. The brat didn't even thank me. He's way too troublesome, really."
Orochimaru-kun started a kind of fad for skates in Konoha during those days. For the next two years or so, wooden skates were popular not only in restaurants, but in the Ninja Academy as well.
"I'm all right, sir.
"No, really. I'm all right.
"..."
"Well it was because...well...
"It went like this. I slept early after the mission. Yes, right...the day I didn't come here for the day. Jiraiya turned up not until much later, two in the morning, I think. I knew he opened the door, but I was so tired, I couldn't even open my eyes. The mission took a lot from me – I thought that if I managed to come here, that'd be a miracle. My Chakra was literally reduced to zero...
"...Jiraiya was not in the mission with me. He came home all giggling...and he smelled of sake. Goodness knows how he got hold of the wine.
"..."
"..."
"...well, I understand because he was drunk, sir.
"But he kissed me.
"I must have woken the whole compound because of the beating I gave him. His arm's in a sling."