House was half conscious when the message was playing but he could identify the voice from a mile away.

"HOUSE! THREE lawsuits in two days. What the hell is wrong with you? I'm going to smash your stupid game boy in t--"

"Why Dr. Fun bags so nice of you to call, I'm afraid I wont need your services tonight."

"House, I mean it, your treading on thin ice," Cuddy spat.

"Well I hope your not going skating then, otherwise were both in trouble."

"You think this is funny?" She asked. He made a weird face at the phone, as if she even had to ask.

"Yeah, ok, we'll go with that, but its only fair because you woke me up from a hot dream, Carmen was just about to take her shirt off"

"Oh you poor baby"

"Oh I know, I'm just waiting for my ba ba to warm up."

Cuddy snickered into the phone and House rolled his eyes. "So did you just call to screech or do you have a reason, I told you I don't feel like being tied down and whipped tonight."

"You wish House, Can you just try and not get a lawsuit tomorrow, I'm still having trouble finding a lawyer."

House scoffed and ran a hand through his hair. "You know, its not very sexy when you sound desperate."

Cuddy gave a long tire sigh, why did he have to be so difficult. "House," She pleaded.

"It depends on how many idiots I have to treat," He said.

"Fine, I'll give you two hours off of clinic duty but thats it."

He thought for a moment and decided he could get another hour out of this. "3 hours, and how long does it take to find one, don't you know know a guy who knows a guy?"

"Yes but unfortunately and I cant imagine why, when they find out you work at the hospital they wont come within fifty feet of it."

"Hmmmmm, cant help you there"

"WHAT! Yes you can, you can stop getting lawsuits idiot"

"But I wanna have fun," He whined. Almost being able to see the roll of her eyes through the phone, House grinned and limped into the laundry room.

"If you get one more I'm going to quadruple your clinic hours"

"Is that a threat," He asked, taking out a white t shirt from the dryer, he slipped it over his head.

"I'm hanging up now," Cuddy said, getting annoyed.

"Fine, sweet dreams"

"Shove it House."

House widened his eyes, "Damn wom---" Nothing but dial tone. "Wonder why she's so pissed off," He thought.

After putting the phone back he was about to sit down again when there was a knock at the door.

"Damn it Wilson, I'm putting you on my cause of death list," House grumbled, swinging open the door. Wilson stepped out of the way as fast as he could but the door still slammed into his shoulder.

"Jesus man, I almost dropped the beer."

"What difference does it make, you buy all that cheap crap anyways," House complained, but moved out of the way and Wilson slid past him.

"It's better than that hundred year old stuff you keep in fridge, I think it's contaminated."

With a roll of eyes, House flopped down beside Wilson and grabbed a beer.

"Come to think of it," He said, taking a large slurp. "I did some experiments with that stuff using the chemistry set I bought at the store."

"Okay--I'm still trying to figure comprehend why you bought a chemistry set."

"Hmmmmm, maybe I wanted to do something crazy like, oh, I don't know, chemistry?"

Wilson raised his brows and bit his bottom lip, trying to fight off a smile. He grabbed a super sized bag of Lays chips and Diritos out of the bag he'd brought, and opened the Lays. "Everything you do is crazy, so why do you need a chemistry set?"

"Every mad scientist has one, that and I was currently working on a potion that would increase Cuddy's cup size to an G."

Wilson gave a snort and ran a hand over his face. "They don't even have a letter G for cup size, do they?"

"They, will, Cuddy will be the first, she'll make Pam Anderson's look like cow tities, and If mix the chemicals right they may be able to support a small civilization."

House looked at Wilson who almost had tears coming from his eyes, he snatched the beer from Wilson's hand that threatened to fall, and set it on the coffee table. "What's so funny?" he asked.

"They're called utters House, did you learn that in say what, kindergarten?"

House rolled his eyes and kicked his feet back onto the table. "They have nipples and they produce milk, no reason to give them special names."

"Yes, but I don't know many woman who have six boobs either."

"Interesting, but creepy."

Wilson shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck, he should have just left it alone.

"Isn't there a game on, you have all the ESPN channels. There, Hawks vs. Eagles?"

"Bet you twenty bucks the Eagles take it." House said.

"Your on, but this time you cant count the interceptions and say they might have been touch downs and add a touch down."

"Your just mad because your team lost, don't worry I'm sure they'll take their next beating with pride."

"Do you ever shut up," Wilson asked.

"Only if I get some Diritos."

House watched Wilson sigh and caught the bag thrown to him. He opened it and started munching them down, he caught Wilson staring at him.

"What?" House asked with a mouthful of chips.

"Do I get some this time?"

House looked at the bag and then Wilson, he reached in and pulled out a single chip and handed it to him. Wilson took it and glared at him.

"Idiot"

They went back to watching the game and House had a tiny smile on his face.