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One Week Later

Lita stood looking out over the backyard of her Sanford, North Carolina home. She watched how the leaves rustled on the trees as a gentle breeze blew, how there just seemed to be an overwhelming sense of peace and calm that surrounded her here – in this place. Her home. In the past, this house was simply a place to sleep when she wasn't on the road, when she had a day or two before she needed to be in the next city. But now? Now it was her refuge. It was the one place she could be where no one asked questions. There were no pressures to pretend she was something she wasn't, no expectations that she should always be happy. It was a relief.

Shivering from the breeze coming in through the window, she pulled on a sweatshirt before opening the door to her bedroom and quietly making her way down the hall, stopping in front of her guest bedroom and glancing inside. The shades had been drawn to keep out the early morning light, darkening the room. Lita padded silently across the hardwood floor until she was standing beside the bed. Glancing down, a soft smile touched her lips. Randy was still sound asleep. He was lying on his stomach, breathing gently, the blanket pulled up tightly around him to keep out the chill, his dark eyelashes contrasting with his tan skin. Lita couldn't help but notice how peaceful he looked, how innocent…

Flashback

Randy and Lita were sitting in her hotel room having a quiet dinner together. It had been a busy week filled with appearances and autograph signings, and of course the live Monday night show. Both wrestlers were happy to finally have some time to simply relax together and enjoy each other's company. For the last few minutes, they had been chatting easily about wrestling and what they planned to do with their free time.

"So what are you planning on doing over the next few days?" asked Randy. When he got no response to his question, Randy looked up and noticed that Lita was simply pushing her sushi rolls around on her plate, completely oblivious to her surroundings. Randy watched her for a moment, before reaching over and lightly running one finger down her hand. Startled, Lita looked up at him and shook her head slightly.

"Sorry. I tend to do that sometimes. I completely zone out and forget everything else that's going on around me. What were you saying?" asked Lita.

Randy smiled at the redheaded diva before responding. "I was saying, that since we have the next couple of days off before we have to be in Providence, I was wondering what you planned on doing during this little break."

"I'm going home. Definitely going home. I need some time to relax, sort through a couple of things, work on getting my head back on straight. Nothing all that fun or exciting – just enjoying finally having some time off, some time away," she said, as she picked up a piece of sushi with her chopsticks and popped it in her mouth.

"Yeah, this break is definitely needed. You mentioned home – where exactly is that?" asked Randy. With that one question, Randy realized how little he actually knew about the beautiful woman sitting before him. They had been thrown together in an intense situation under the most trying circumstances, both keeping a huge secret from their friends, striving to begin a relationship in the midst of chaos. It would be so great to be alone with her for these few days, to just be able to talk to her, hold her. God, I would love to go home with her – but I could never, ever suggest it. That would probably make her feel incredibly uncomfortable…and we've made so much progress the last few days – she doesn't pull away from my touch anymore. I don't want to ruin that.

"Home is in Sanford, North Carolina. It's between Raleigh and Fayetteville?" Lita noticed the confused expression on Randy's face and giggled. Randy smiled at the sound – he so rarely heard her laugh, that it was music to his ears. "It's a pretty quiet town, but I love it. There's this place called the Antique Mall in downtown that I like to go to. I like to see if I can find anything new to decorate the house with," she continued. Should I ask him to come home with me? Ask him to spend the next few days in Sanford? Would he read too much into it? Would he think I wanted to – no! I know he wouldn't. He's been nothing but a gentleman. I know how he feels about me and I know he would never do anything to hurt me. "Are you going back to St. Louis?" Lita finally asked.

"No – I thought I might just head to Providence. Visit with some old friends who live in the area, that sort of thing," said Randy as he finished his last piece of sushi. Pushing his plate away, he leaned back in his chair, letting out a contented sigh, a small smile forming at the corner of his lips. This is nice – just the two of us, enjoying a quiet dinner. No interruptions, no friends asking questions, wanting answers…no one but us.

"Randy? Are you okay?" questioned Lita, concern showing in her hazel eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just thinking that this is nice. The two of us being here together, like this? It's quiet and peaceful and we can just talk. I like being with you like this."

"Me too. Somehow this just seems right, you know? I don't know – that sounds kind of silly I guess," said Lita, ducking her head and blushing slightly at her words.

"You look cute when you do that – blush, I mean. Your cheeks match your hair," said Randy as he reached out and ran his finger gently down Lita's cheek.

Lita looked up and stared at Randy for a moment. She offered him a small smile. Yes, she felt comfortable in Randy's presence. Yet, at the same time, in the back of her mind, there was always a touch of nerves, something that would never allow her to completely relax – something that would always keep her slightly on edge. And despite everything she had been through, she was here – in this room, with this man, starting to live her life again, starting to feel again, starting to believe again that she would be okay – that it would just take time.

"So you're not going home then?" she asked, taking a sip of water and leaning back slightly in her chair.

"I guess not. I don't know. I still might change my mind and head home, but my family is away on vacation at the moment, so they're not around and I just don't feel like hanging around my apartment by myself for three days…" mused Randy.

"Oh. I understand that. Well, why don't you just come home with me then?" The words slipped from Lita's mouth before she even had a moment to think. She looked at Randy with wide eyes and a slightly surprised expression on her face. Oh shit! I can't believe I just asked him like that. Yeah, the thought crossed my mind, but still…

"Are you sure? I mean, are you sure you want me to come home with you?" he asked, carefully watching her facial expressions.

Lita thought for a moment, before responding. Do I really want him to come home with me? Yes, I do. I want him to – I want to spend these next few days with him. Just the two of us. "I think it would be good. I'd like the company – at least I'd like your company. As long as you don't mind just hanging around eating mint chocolate chip ice cream and watching movies."

Randy shook his head in response to her comment. He had never, in all his life, seen anyone with the capacity to eat mint chocolate chip ice cream like Lita did. "I don't mind. I think it would be nice. And I'd really like to get to know you better."

Lita looked at the man sitting in front of her in amazement. Since the night she had told him how she needed him in her life, she had felt a sense of peace. Yes, she still was weary of dark parking lots and loud noises, but with Randy there was nothing but comfort. When he had held her in his arms and danced with her, she had never felt so cared for, so wanted, so cherished. "I'd like that very much as well…"

End of Flashback

So he had flown home with her to Sanford. And now Lita stood watching Randy sleep in her guest bedroom. She reached out and gently traced the contours of his face with her finger. A smile crept onto Randy's lips as he slowly opened his eyes. Looking up, he noticed Lita standing over him, watching him. The early morning sun cast shadows across her face, making her look more exotic than usual.

"This a pretty good way to wake up in the morning," he whispered as he reached out and captured Lita's hand in his, pulling her down to sit on the edge of the bed beside his prone body. "I think I could get used to this."

Lita stared down into Randy's blue eyes. She felt her heart begin beating faster as she gazed at his face. He was looking at her through eyes filled with such passion, desire, and need. Lita felt a shiver run down her spine. Her breath caught in her throat as she tried to look away. But, his icy eyes seemed to captivate her, hold her, pull her towards him.

Randy returned her stare, not blinking, barely breathing. Her hazel eyes were looking at him – just watching, waiting, her lips slightly parted. He noticed the flushed appearance of her face, the way her bright red hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail. He thought she had never looked so beautiful. Slowly, he leaned up onto his elbows until his face was only inches from hers. Lita subconsciously licked her lips, as Randy's glance flickered briefly to her mouth. Looking back up to her eyes, Randy saw the hesitation reflected in them, the fear. Not fear of him – he knew that now. But fear of taking that next step forward, fear of falling into something she wasn't prepared for yet.

Lita's emotions were conflicted. She didn't know whether to run from the room and hide or press her lips to his, let him wrap his arms around her, feel his body against hers. She wanted to feel that passion again, that desire, that heat. But she couldn't – not yet. I just can't give myself over to him…if I were to let go, let him kiss me, I-I…it's just too soon. Too soon to let go…too soon… Looking away, she stood up from the bed, taking a deep breath as she did so.

"I-I better go make us some breakfast. Are eggs okay?" she stammered. Before Randy could answer, she scurried from the room, leaving behind silence in her wake. Flopping back on the bed, Randy let out an exasperated sigh and looked up at the ceiling for a moment before climbing out of bed. So close and still so far away. Patience – that's the key. Let her make the first move. When she's ready… he thought as he pulled on a pair of track pants and made his way downstairs.

The Kitchen

Lita was just pouring the eggs into a heated pan when Randy walked into the kitchen. "I hope scrambled is okay?" she asked, not looking up from the stove. Randy studied her for a moment before speaking.

"Lita? Don't run from me…please?" he begged.

"Randy, I-I um…I'm sorry," she said quietly as she stirred the eggs in the pan.

Randy couldn't believe she was apologizing to him. She had nothing to be sorry about. She had invited him into her home, let him stay with her. But, she wasn't ready for that next step yet – and Randy completely understood how difficult, how scary, the physical aspect of a relationship was going to be after everything she had gone through.

Randy watched Lita as she scooped the eggs onto two waiting plates. He slowly walked towards her, stopping to stand behind her. Lightly wrapping his arms around her waist, he pulled her gently to him so her back was against his bare chest. He could feel how tense she was, how uncertain she was about taking that next small step in their relationship. He noticed that her hand shook slightly as she placed the pan back on the stove.

"I would never do anything you don't want me to Li," he whispered, resting his chin on her shoulder. "I would never do anything to hurt you. And I would never want you to feel uncomfortable or afraid around me…" He could feel the tension slowly starting to ease from her body, could feel her beginning to relax against him.

Turning in his arms, her eyes widened for a moment as she realized he wasn't wearing a shirt, but then she leaned her head against his chest, enjoying the warmth of his skin. "Randy…I'm not sure I'm ready yet. It's still so soon. After everything that's happened, I-I just don't think I can be with you – in that way – right now," she choked out as tears began to stream down her cheeks.

"I know that and I completely understand. But I promised you Li – that first night – that I would be there for you. And I'm not planning on going anywhere. I can wait for you…for as long as it takes…I'll wait for you," Randy said, as he wrapped his arms more firmly around her. He hated to see her cry, hated it when she was sad. She had been sad for too long now – he wanted to do everything in his power to make her happy.

"Forever is a long time Randy. Are you really willing to wait that long?" asked Lita as she released herself from his hold, crossing her arms protectively in front of her. Randy felt the tension once again fill the room, felt her withdrawing from him. She picked up their plates from the counter and moved to place them on the table. Randy watched her movements, noticed how she refused to look at him. He didn't want to lose the seemingly fragile trust that had developed over the past couple of weeks. He couldn't lose that trust; he couldn't lose her. Randy took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself, to relax the strain in his muscles, to gain some amount of control over his emotions.

As Lita turned to make her way back into the kitchen, Randy took a step towards her, blocking her path. Hooking a finger under her chin, he lifted her eyes to him. He took a moment, simply looking into her eyes, trying to tell her without words what he was thinking. After a moment, Lita averted her gaze, her eyes wandering, studying the room, looking at anything except the man standing before her.

"I'm here with you aren't I?" asked Randy, in a voice choked with emotion. Lita looked up at him, surprised. She could hear the hurt in his voice, could her how his voice shook slightly as he spoke. He looked at her, his gaze never wavering. Taking a breath to steady himself, Randy continued. "This is where I want to be. You're the woman I want to be with. You captivate me Li. I close my eyes and I see you – your eyes, your smile, your beauty. You're in my dreams when I sleep and when I'm awake, I just want to be close to you, to hold you in my arms. So, when you ask me if I'm really willing to wait that long? My answer is yes. I want it all – the good, the bad, the happy-"

"The fear?" interrupted Lita. "The nightmares? The worry?" She started to push past him then, but Randy grasped her arm and pulled her back towards him. Lita looked at him with wide, questioning eyes.

"I just want you. All of you. And for however long it takes? Well, then that's how long I'll wait. And as for all that other stuff? The fear, the nightmares, the worry – you're going to get through it Li. And I'm going to be with you every step of the way."

Lita was silent. I have no words right now. He's willing to give it all up for me – the parties, the late nights, everything. He's not running away…

"You-you're sure? It's an awful lot to ask Randy. I mean, you-"

"It's not a lot to ask. If this was something I didn't want to do, if you weren't someone that I really honestly and truly cared about, then I would never have even come here to Sanford, spent this time with you. I want you Li – your heart, your soul, your mind, your body. I want it all," Randy said quietly as he ran his fingers through her bright red hair. A smile slowly curved the corners of Lita's lips. She gazed up into his unblinking sapphire eyes and knew, she just knew that every word he had spoken to her was true. Randy ran his finger gently down her cheek and leaned down close to whisper in her ear. "Trust me, Li. Let it all go, just for a little while, and trust me…"

Lita let out a shaky sigh. Having him so close, feeling his warm breath on her skin, was making her knees feel weak. She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to regain some amount of composure. However, even when she closed her eyes, she could still hear his softly spoken words, see him standing before her with that lopsided smile.

"I trust you Randy. You're about the only person I do trust nowadays. The only person I feel completely comfortable around. And that scares the shit out of me, because it shouldn't be that way. I shouldn't feel that way – I just like being with you I guess. When I'm around you, when we're together? I feel free – well, almost," she said with a shaky laugh. "I know that I'm safe, that you would never do anything to hurt me." Her eyes once again fell briefly to his lips as she pushed a stray piece of hair behind her ear. Now all I have to do is lean in and kiss him. I want to, God knows I want to. I came so close to kissing those full red lips this morning. Just like Randy said…let it go. Let it all go – the fear, and the worry, and uncertainty – and just be in the moment…

Randy closed his eyes for a moment and lowered his head, letting out the breath he didn't know he had been holding. For a while, he thought he had lost her – that she had changed her mind about being with him, about wanting him in her life. Lita was watching him and was floored by the flood of emotions that crossed his face. He actually looked scared, that he had been afraid of what she would say, how she would react to them almost kissing. She took a step towards him. Gently lifting his head so he was looking at her, she reached up and ran her hand tentatively down his cheek. Randy shuddered at her touch. The next thing he knew, Lita's lips were pressed gently against his, her arms moving to encircle his neck. His arms went instinctively around her waist, but he continued to let Lita control the kiss.

As quickly as it had begun, Lita ended the kiss and stepped out of Randy's embrace. "Our breakfast is probably cold. I, uh – I better put it in the microwave for a minute," she whispered as she gave him a small smile before turning and grabbing the plates off the table, making her way back into the kitchen. Randy stood in shocked silence, his eyes wide at what had just transpired. He instinctively brought his hand to his lips, trying to hold the memory of that kiss.

"Wow…" It was the only thing that came to mind. He whispered that one word as he watched her disappear into the kitchen.

Later that day…

The sun was beginning to set, lighting the sky in beautiful hues of red, yellow, and orange. A light breeze blew, rustling the leaves. A sense of peace and quiet seemed to descend over everything the sun touched. Randy and Lita sat quietly on the front porch of her home, simply staring out across the yard. Although neither spoke, the silence that surrounded them was, in no way, uncomfortable. On the contrary – it was almost the perfect ending to a perfect day. The pair had spent the day relaxing, talking about their lives, their hopes for the future, what each wanted to do when they could no longer wrestle. They did not, however, talk about the events of the morning – mainly – the kiss.

Randy sat with his arm resting lightly across Lita's shoulders. He smiled as he looked down at the redheaded diva – she looked so comfortable – her head resting gently on his shoulder, her breathing relaxed and even, her hand lying on his chest, feeling his heartbeat. Randy once again looked out over the front yard of her home, admiring the gardens, enjoying the quiet, enjoying holding this beautiful woman in his arms. And yet, there was something bothering him. Something that he had wanted to ask her since this morning.

"Li?" Randy asked quietly, as he shifted slightly in his seat, drawing her closer to him. He was unsure how to bring up the subject – how to ask her about the kiss. He wanted to know why she had done it, what had made her change her mind so suddenly. Minutes before, she had seemed so frightened, so fearful of even being physically close to him. And then – wham! – her lips were on his. I'm not saying I didn't like it – because I sure as hell did. That kiss was absolutely amazing – mind blowing. And it didn't even last that long or lead to anything else. Maybe it's because I was, for the first time in my life, kissing someone who I really and truly care about. But I still want to know why – why did she suddenly change her mind. Why did she decide to kiss me?

"Hmmm?" murmured Lita. At this moment, she was too comfortable, too relaxed to actually respond, yet there was something in his voice that concerned her. She slowly sat up and turned to face Randy, unconsciously crossing her arms in front of her – her protective mechanism when she was nervous or worried about something. Lita looked into his eyes for a moment, saw the apprehension, the confusion, and drew her arms more tightly around herself, just looking at him. Randy noticed the look that flashed across her face, noticed that she seemed uncertain, slightly withdrawn, and offered her a lopsided smile before reaching out and carefully pulling her hands into his. He studied her for a moment before speaking.

"This morning? When you kissed me? Umm…why…" he looked at her helplessly, not quite sure how to put into words what he really wanted to ask. Lita returned his stare, trying to sort through her own thoughts, her own feelings before responding. Looking down at their entwined hands, she knew her answer, knew exactly why she had chosen to kiss him, why she had let her guard down for that brief moment, and went with her heart instead of her head. She looked back up into his eyes, those captivating blue eyes, and gave him a small smile.

"I did it because I wanted to. I did it because you're the man I want to be with. You're the man who has kept my secret, even when it meant lying to your best friend. You're the man who held me when I woke up crying from a nightmare. You're the man who is willing to stay in a hotel room and order takeout instead of going to restaurants because you know I don't like being outside at night. You're the man who is willing to wait for me, wait until I'm ready to take that next step forward…you're the man who makes me feel safe, comfortable, cared for. That's why I kissed you this morning. For no other reason." Except that I had to be the one to do it – I had to kiss him first in order to take back some amount of control over my own life. It had to be my choice, my move…it had to be me kissing him. Me. "Is that what you wanted to know?"

"Well-uh…yeah, I guess. I mean, it just surprised me is all…" said Randy, becoming slightly flustered as Lita sat quietly, continuing to watch him. Laughing softly, she squeezed his hands reassuringly. He's usually the one comforting and supporting me; I wonder why suddenly he's so unsure of himself.

"It surprised me too. But Randy? It was something I wanted to do. I wanted to kiss you. For one second, I needed to push aside the fear, the uncertainty, push away everything and just be in the moment. I needed to take back that part of my life, take control of the feelings I've had for you, the-the desire I have for you…" she said trailing off. "Even if, for right now, I can only express that in a kiss." Lita looked at him, hoping he would understand what she was trying so desperately to explain to him.

She was almost shocked to see the look in his eyes – there was no more apprehension, no sign of confusion, just absolute longing and desire. He was staring down at her, his blue eyes telling her exactly what he was feeling – he wanted her – and was willing to except whatever she could give him, whatever she was comfortable with.

She saw his eyes flicker briefly to her lips before his trademark smirk appeared.

Pushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear, he bent forward and whispered, "So, would it be okay if I kissed you this time?" Lita's breath hitched as she felt his hot breath against her neck, felt him let go of her hands and slowly drag his fingertips up her bare arms, making her shiver.

Letting out a shaky breath, Lita answered. "I, um…I think I would…I would like that. If you kissed me…"

Randy stared deeply into her eyes for a moment, looking for any sign of hesitation, any indication that this was not what Lita wanted. When he saw nothing resembling uncertainty, he slowly leaned forward and just as his lips were about to touch Lita's –

"I, um…I better get that," said Lita, pulling away and staring into his eyes for a moment before turning and racing inside to answer the ringing telephone. Randy watched her run back into the house, and sat back in the porch swing, letting out a frustrated groan. I don't need to rush things with her – remember that. She's not going anywhere. I'm most definitely not going anywhere. We have all the time in the word to be together. With that thought, Randy stood up and made his way inside. Entering the kitchen, he saw Lita leaning against the counter, twirling a finger in her hair.

"Trish – wait, slow down, what-what were saying?" asked Lita, as she looked at Randy and smiled. Randy winked at her, before grabbing a bottle of water from the refrigerator and heading into the living room to watch some television.

"Geez Li. Will you pay attention! I said…guess where we're going to be doing a show in three weeks?" asked Trish with an exasperated sigh, as she lounged in her Toronto home. She was surprised to hear her friend sounding so calm. Maybe the few days of rest and relaxation had done her some good. Maybe when they were back on the road, Lita would finally be comfortable talking to her friends about what had been going on the last few months. Maybe.

"Um, let me check," said Lita as she turned to look at the calendar that was hanging up on the wall. "We're going to be in New Hampshire. Manchester, I think. What's the big deal about that?"

Trish sighed again into the phone and Lita could almost picture her best friend rolling her eyes. "Have you not checked your e-mail or your cell phone messages the past three days? The show in Manchester was cancelled. There's been a lot of rain up there, and part of the arena roof sprung a major leak and flooded the place. So they've moved it to another venue!" exclaimed Trish, her excitement growing with each passing word.

"So, then where are we going? Please tell me we don't have to fly across the country or something. I'm definitely not in the mood to spend nine hours on a plane. Now, will you just tell me already? The suspense is killing me!" said Lita with a small laugh.

Trish smiled at the sound. It was nice to hear her friend laughing, if only for a moment. It was a sound she hadn't heard in a very long time. "We're going to Boston! Can you believe it? I already talked to Stacy and she is just as excited. We're going to have so much fun. We'll go back to that club we went to last time…we'll dance, we'll have margaritas! It'll be great…" Trish continued to ramble on about how excited she was about returning to Boston, but Lita had stopped listening.

She pulled the phone away from her ear and stood staring at it in disbelief. Lita could hear Trish still talking. At the same time, she felt her throat beginning to close, felt the tears beginning to slide down her cheeks, felt her hands beginning to shake. She let out a small whimper as she slid to the floor, grasping the phone tightly in her hand.

"Lita? Li? Li? Are you still there? Li, what's wrong? What happened? Lita?" called Trish over the phone. What is going on? What the hell is going on? wondered Trish as she continued to call Lita's name. She was becoming increasingly worried about her friend, especially as the silence continued to grow on the other end of the phone. Lita could hear her voice, but she was unable to respond, too gripped by fear to form a rational thought or sentence.

Randy, walking back into the kitchen to see if Lita was done with her phone conversation, was instantly concerned as he saw the woman he deeply cared for emotionally falling apart before him. He noticed the tears streaming down her cheeks, noticed how her hands were shaking, noticed how she was gripping the phone so tightly that her knuckles were almost white. Kneeling down in front of Lita, he pried her hand off the phone, still hearing Trish's concerned voice calling through the receiver.

"She'll have to call you back." And without another word, he hung up the phone.

What the hell is going on? What did I say that would make Lita just stop talking? What would make her cry? She seemed relaxed, almost happy a minute before and then it all changed. What happened? Trish thought, a concerned look crossing her face. And who's voice was that? I recognize it…who…who? Randy! Holy shit, it was Randy! What is Randy doing in Sanford? Trish immediately dialed Stacy's number to tell her what had happened, now more worried about her friend than ever before.

Randy sat down next to Lita, carefully pulling her into his lap, wrapping his strong arms around her. She immediately gripped his t-shirt with her hands, the tears continuing to stream down her cheeks. Lita wanted to tell Randy what Trish had said, explain why she was so upset, but no coherent thoughts would form in her head, no words would come out of her mouth. All she could think about was that she was going back – back to her hell, her living nightmare. How am I going to do that? How am I going to go back? she thought as she continued to cry in Randy's arms.

Randy simply held her, rocking her gently, stroking his fingers through her hair, trying to calm her. "Talk to me Li. What happened? What's got you so upset?" he asked, barely above a whisper. I've never seen her like this. In all the time I've known her, I've never seen her so frightened, so vulnerable. I-I don't know what to do…I don't know what to say…

Lita buried her head in his chest, practically choking on her words, and whispered, "We're going back…"

Thanks to everyone who reviewed...it really means a lot to me. Hope you liked this chapter. Please read and review!