Basketball Blunders

Disclaimer: "To which the old Mac could say only one thing: 'Bite me'." – "Weird" Al Yankovic

Chapter 5: Quiet Moment

Bayville

"Hmmm hmmm hmmmmm…" Duncan Matthews hummed happily as he walked down the street. He passed by the Bayville Arena. He noticed the marquee flashing in bright lights. "Hey…a hockey game in town." The blond jock smiled. "Cool. I love a good hockey game. The thrill of victory…the plays…and of course…" His smile grew wider. "The fights." Duncan bought a ticket and went inside. He sat down in the front row behind the goal. The crowd cheered as two hockey players started slugging it out in front of him, to the delight of the crowd. "Alright! Yeah! Use your left, use your left!" One player aimed a punch, but the other player ducked, and the first player ended up nailing Duncan in the mouth. "OW!" Duncan screamed, covering his bloody mouth. Meanwhile, a third player fired a slapstick shot at the goal. The puck flew past the goalie for the point. However, the puck was hit so hard and fast, it went through the goal net and whacked Duncan right between the eyes.

The Malibu youth center

"Man…I feel bad for Don." Alison Blaire, the blonde Farrah-haired mutant lightengale and singer codenamed Dazzler, sighed as she moved a checker forward. She and three fellow members of the West Coast Misfits were sitting in the basketball court's stands, watching the kids and Don play, and having their own fun. Ali was playing checkers with her friend Terrell Mason, the Compton-born aerokinetic and speedster codenamed Velocity. With them was Kyle Wildfire, the young Boston-born electrokinetic mutant codenamed Thunderbolt, was sitting on a stand above them, playing a portable video game.

"Come on…come on…" Kyle scowled, moving his game about as if it would help him win. "Come here, you stupid lousy jabroni bugs!" A beeping was heard. The Bostonian whooped. "Alright! That's it! Yeah! That's right! You think you bugs can touch me? Huh? Well, come on! Just bring it! The Thunderbolt will layeth the royal smacketh down on all of you! Yeah!" What sounded like victory music was heard from the game! "Yeah! Yeah! WHOOOO!" Kyle whooped in victory. "The Thunderbolt is the champion! All hail the mighty Thunderbolt!" Terrell watched Kyle celebrate, and the corn-rowed African-American teenager shook his head.

"Man, that boy needs to seriously cut back on the sugar." Terrell sighed, shaking his head. "It bad enough that guy gets hyperactive when he carries too many watts."

"Not his fault." Ali shook her head. "It's a side effect of Kyle's powers. His body is constantly charging. When he gets overcharged, his body tries to get rid of the excess energy. If Kyle doesn't discharge it as lightening, he gets hyperactive." Terrell blinked.

"Wow, girl. Since when did you become a biology expert?" Ali shrugged at Terrell's question.

"I didn't. And I'm not. I heard Stretcher say that once." The lightengale explained. She looked at the board. "Are you going to move, Terrell?"

"Yeah, yeah. Calm down." Terrell chuckled.

"And here I was, thinking that speedsters were impatient." Ali laughed as Terrell moved a checker. Ali looked down at the board, and her jaw dropped. "Holy…"

"Ha!" Terrell laughed. "King me!" He snickered at Ali. "Man, girl! You left a hole your defense that was wide open! I'm surprised."

"Of all the times to suddenly have a 'dumb blonde' moment." Ali groaned. Kyle overheard this and snickered.

"Could be worse, Blaire. You could've developed an urge to sing a rendition of 'Happy Birthday' to the President." The Bostonian snickered. Ali rolled her eyes.

"Kyle, I don't think that the current President has the appropriate reputation." Ali rolled her eyes.

"Yeah." Terrell added with a laugh. "I doubt that the current President would know what to do with a woman. He's still trying to figure out how the doorknob works."

"Yeah." Kyle agreed. "Poor man tried to leave that thing with the Chinese, but he ended up looking like an idiot. Must be genetic for members of the Bush family to embarrass themselves in Asian countries. Think about it. His old man puked on a dignitary in Japan." Kyle laughed. Ali rolled her eyes.

"Guys, I think you're being a little too hard. Nobody is that incompetent in reality."

"Ali, you obviously have conveniently forgotten about our friends in the Dreadnok organization." Kyle reminded. Ali sighed.

"Okay, I admit it. There are people who are that incompetent." Ali admitted, raising her hands. "But I highly doubt anybody could elect someone as incompetent as a Dreadnok to the highest office in the country."

"Hey, kids." Don walked up to the stands. "What are you talking about?"

"Whether it's cool to make stupid jokes in regard to the current President or not." Kyle quipped.

"Ha ha ha." Terrell groaned.

"What?" Kyle blinked.

"Where are the Joes?" Don asked when noticed the two Joes, the red-haired pyromaniacal demolitions expert called Firestorm, and the blond machine gunner known as Rock 'n' Roll, were not with the teenage mutants.

"They're back out at the base." Kyle shrugged, pointing behind him with his thumb.

"Yeah." Ali remembered. "They went out to get some more information on the Whip."

"Maybe they'll find something that can be used against him." Terrell suggested. "It's the classic story."

"Oh yeah, every comic book has used it: Evil businessman is revealed to have history of screwing over rivals with underhanded tactics." Kyle agreed. "Heh. In fact, the Thunderbolt can name at least ten comic books that have used that storyline in some form."

The Whip's penthouse suite, Malibu

"Whoo-wee!" Rock 'n' Roll whistled, impressed. He and Firestorm used a window washer's platform to bring themselves to the penthouse's windows. They happened to be dressed as window washers. The two Joes looked into the penthouse. It was a beautiful expansive penthouse, with white carpets and matching furniture, with golden trim. "Look at all that stuff! Man, you'd have to be mega-rich to be able to stay in that place for just one night!"

"Yeah…" Firestorm grinned widely. "Personally, I'd love to set fire to that carpet." Rock 'n' Roll blinked at Firestorm in an 'You-are-a-very-crazy-man' way, before shaking his head and getting back to the task at hand.

"Right…" Rock 'n' Roll sighed. "Anyway, is the distraction doing his job?" Firestorm laughed.

"Don't worry about it, Rock 'n' Roll." The redhead laughed. "BR will keep the ol' Whipster distracted.

The hotel's restaurant

"What is that thing?" An old woman screeched in outrage. The restaurant was in chaos. A certain Joe monkey was running around, causing havoc by leaping on tables and throwing around food, scaring guests, cracking faces, and generally acting insane.

"It's disgusting!"

"Get it off my table!"

"Augh! It set fire to my tie!"

"Hey, that was my spaghetti!"

"MY WHIP!" The Whip screamed as he ran around the restaurant, chasing after BR. The little Macaque monkey, dressed in his green headband and orange jacket with lots of pockets, scooted around the restaurant, the Whip's namesake weapon hanging around his neck. "COME BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE-!" The white-clad businessman leapt onto a table after BR, breaking it, spilling food and rink everywhere, and shocking the guests. "ARGH!"

The penthouse

"I'm sure he is." Rock 'n' Roll chuckled. "Anyway, let's go. We got a job to do."

Well, well, well! Looks like our heroes are mounting a plan! What insanity will happen next? Where are Metallix? Can BR keep the Whip distracted? What will the Joes find? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!