Jeff Probst's voice over: Previously on "Survivor:" Autobotopea had tempers flaring. (Shots of Starscream and Grimlock's argument.) Decepticonniption was hit hard with not one but TWO tribal councils, voting off both Wheelie and Ironhide. (Footage of both Decepticonniptions walking away from the tribe.) Can both tribes keep it up?

Author's note: I will run the standard beginning but for the sake of keeping track of everything I am providing the new list of tribe members.

New Decepticonniption (Teal and white striped buff)

Megatron

Ironhide

Scrapper

Rumble

Wheelie

Optimus Prime

Red Alert

New Autobotopea (Pink with white polka dot buff)

Grimlock

Motormaster

Mirage

Shrapnel

Mishap

Soundwave

Starscream

Authors note: Confessionals will be italicized

DAY TWENTY-ONE

(Decepticonniption are all scattered, either swimming or trying to build a fire or out getting firewood.)

Optimus Prime: (High School Guidance Counselor, teal and white buff is around his arm). With Ironhide gone, I am the only remaining Autobot in this tribe. My time grows short. Darkness is at hand. One shall stand, one shall fall. (Shakes fist off camera.) Megatron is going down.

(Megatron is shown sitting at his throne, whistling. He's carving something while Rumble, at his feet, braids something else.)

Rumble: Hey, guys! Check it out! (Scrapper comes back, clutching treemail, Optimus lumbers out of the water.) We made tribal hemp necklaces! (Passes them out. They have conch shells strung at even length, fit close, like a choker. Rumble finishes tying Megatron's.) Not bad, eh?

Scrapper: Cute!

Optimus Prime: Thanks, guys.

Megatron: (Glows with pride for a moment.) The hard part was carving the holes in the shells.

Optimus Prime: We will wear them with pride, Meggy.

Megatron: (Makes a fist) Nobody nicknames Megatron!

Optimus Prime: Then it pleases me to be the first.

(Shots of Autobotpea, who are reading treemail as Scrapper gnaws at a corner of it. It is raining again.)

Motormaster: (Yanking it away from Shrapnel) "Thundercracker, Ramjet, Thrust, and Dirge! Ultra Magnus, Bluestreak, Trailbreaker! You will get an emotional surge! We are raising all the stake-er, wait! You will satisfy an urge!"

Starscream: Insert rant here.

Mirage: Are you OK, Starscream?

Starscream: (Tired.) I am all right. Slept wrong on my back, but otherwise fine.

Starscream: (Julliard Instructor, buff is worn as an armband.) I have become weary of this stupid game. When are we going to take over the planet?

REWARD CHALLENGE

(Shots of Jeff Probst, grinning as the rain starts falling again.)

Jeff: Welcome! Come on over! (Gestures to benches set up. They sit.) Notice who's missing?

Mirage: Ironhide! (Starts looking scared.)

Jeff: Yes, Ironhide has been voted off of Decepticonniption. Hey, nice necklaces!

Optimus Prime: Meggy made them.

Megatron: I will kick your aft in six different places, Prime!

Jeff: Hey, that's enough. I want you all to drop your buffs. (Braces for another attack of armor bustplates.) You got it right!

Grimlock: ME GRIMLOCK SORELY TEMPTED.

Jeff: Well, it's the moment you've all been waiting for: Here are your new buffs! (Passes out chartreuse and black houndstooth check buffs.) You are officially a new, merged tribe. You can come up with a name later. Right now, I have a special reward challenge for you. (Turns to big screen TV that was not on-camera at any time but now.) First I think you should get a glimpse of the reward. (Invisible hands turn it on. Swoop is onscreen.)

Swoop: Hi Grimlock! It's me Swoop!

Grimlock: (Bounces up and down in his seat.) SWOOP!

Jeff: Right, Grimlock. In case you haven't figured it out, your reward is a taped message from your loved ones. ONE of you will get to see all of the message. The rest of you only get a greeting. (Next on is Shockwave.)

Shockwave: Hail Mighty Megatron! (Makes salute.)

Megatron: (Bursts into tears.) That's my best friend!

Starscream: I'll bet.

Skyfire: Greetings, old friend.

Starscream: Hey, Skyfire! My fraternity brother!

Elita-1: Hi honey! (Very young Hot Rod and Arcee are there with her, waving and saying 'Hi Dad!')

Optimus Prime: (Voice box a little scratchy) My family.

Constructicons: Hey! Scrapper!

Hook: It's not the same without you!

Bonecrusher: Yeah! There's actually enough energon to go around! (They all laugh.)

Scrapper: My co-workers!

(The whole time this is going on, sappy music plays.)

Mishap: Hey brother! Have I beaten you yet?

Mirage: (Laughs.) We agreed to send each other the message, for fun.

Soundwave: Greetings, Rumble. (Other tapes are around him, making noise.)

Rumble: (Trying not to cry.) That's MY family! (Starts bawling.)

(Jeff tears up.)

Bombshell and Kickback: Hi Shrapnel!

Shrapnel: My brothers, brothers. (Smiles happily.)

Stunticons: Hey! Motormaster! (They flip him off, which is pixilated.)

Motormaster: (Laughing.) Inside joke.

Jeff: Whatever makes you a happy Decepticon. (Turns off TV.) Think it's a reward worth playing for? (They all say yeah.) OK, then. Here's your challenge: Because you all have perfect memories, it is unfair to tax you at a memory game. Instead, I am going on a hobby all of you happen to have. Every single one of you is a cartoon fanatic.

Megatron: You promised you wouldn't tell anyone!

Jeff: Sorry. (Passes out notebooks and markers.) Anyway, this is a test of how well you know the most vital part of a cartoon character, which would be their voice. I will ask you a question, and you will write down the name of the actor you think is the correct answer. Now, this challenge is double-sided. The winning person gets to see their whole video. The winning person's former tribemates are allowed to chose which tribal camp they wish everyone to live in. Any questions? (None. Music tenses.) First question: This actor was known as "The Man of 1,000 Voices." (Some write, some are thinking.) "The Man of 1,000 Voices." Grimlock's got it. Motormaster, Scrapper, Shrapnel, Megatron, Starscream...you all got it right. "Mel Blanc" is the man of 1,000 voices. Everyone has a point.

Shrapnel: I hope they're all this easy, easy.

Jeff: Next question: This actor is known as "The Voice God" in the cartoon industry, with credits in Disney movies and television, mostly doing animal voices. (There is thinking.) Hmm...This one's a little harder. Scrapper has "Maurice LeMarche." Grimlock has "June Foray." Optimus Prime has..."Peter Cullen"?

Optimus: He does Eeyore in Winnie-The-Pooh!

Megatron: You are an idiot.

Jeff: Wow, some of you didn't get this one. Starscream, Shrapnel, Rumble, Motormaster, Mirage, and Megatron all have it correct. It is "Frank Welker." You have two points; Optimus, Grimlock, and Scrapper have one point. Next question. (Flips card.) This actor was best known for his voice as Cobra Commander on "G.I. Joe." Since all of you watched that, I know you'll get this.

Starscream: I have the action figures.

Jeff: You all have it right. I will accept either "Christopher Collins" or "Chris Latta." Next question: He did a cartoon voice, but mostly appeared on various episodes of "Square One," as well as advertisements for Micro-Machines.

(This one has them all stumped. Some take wild guesses, but only Shrapnel knows that it's "John Moschitta Jr.") Shrapnel pulls ahead! Next question: This actor did a plethora of voices on the Smurfs, including Handy Smurf, Lazy Smurf, and Grouchy Smurf.

Scrapper: I HATE Smurfs!

Jeff: Good imitation!

Scrapper: Who's imitating? (Everyone gets "Michael Bell," Except for Grimlock, who wrote "June Foray" again.)

Jeff: We now have it as this: Grimlock, two points; Optimus Prime and Scrapper are at three; Starscream, Rumble, Motormaster, Megatron, and Mirage are at four; Shrapnel pulls ahead with five points.

Rumble: Are we done yet?

Jeff: NO! Next question: This cartoon voice actor has made personal appearances on Star Trek, I Spy, Man from U.N.C.L.E., and Hawaii 5-0.

Motormaster and Scrapper: (Without any cue, start singing that theme, banging their heads.) Da da da da daaaaa-duh, da da da da Daaaaaa.

Jeff: Motormaster has it, Starscream has it, Shrapnel has it. Grimlock has "Tress MacNeille."

Grimlock: SHE RATHER MANNISH.

Jeff: I thought she was hot in that Weird Al video. "Michael Chain" is correct. No one has beaten Shrapnel yet. Next one: Who did the voice of the Tin Woodman in the 1990 cartoon "The Wizard of Oz?"

Megatron: That was a SHOW?

Optimus Prime: It was not a popular kids' cartoon.

Jeff: Optimus has it, Shrapnel has it. Wow. Only two of you got "Hal Rayle" correct. Last question: This actor, known for her roles in television and Broadway, did the voice of Pearl in "Home on the Range."

Mirage: Oasis would know this...

Jeff: This one is a difficult one. Or maybe not! Starscream has it! "Sarah Jessica Parker."

Scrapper: How do you know that?

Starscream: My ex-girlfriend made me watch "Sex and the City" with her.

(Others make whipping noises, refuse to belief he had a girlfriend, etc.)

Jeff: Well, this is how it is: Shrapnel and Starscream are tied with six, Motormaster has five; Optimus Prime, Rumble, Motormaster, Megatron, and Mirage have four; Scrapper three; Grimlock two.

Grimlock: (Sadly) ME GRIMLOCK SORRY, SWOOP.

Jeff: You'll see him when you get back. One more question, maybe this will break the tie. The voice of Scooby Doo was not his first cartoon show; he actually began with "The Flintstones." You all got that right. "Don Messick" was the voice of Scooby Doo.

Rumble: Until Frank Welker took over!

Jeff: May I remind you that this is not "Jeopardy." Grimlock, you don't have to write "Who is Don Messick?"

Grimlock: YOU JEFF PROBST PHRASE LIKE TREBECK, ME GRIMLOCK ANSWER LIKE JENNINGS.

Jeff: Since Shrapnel and Starscream are still tied, we have to do a lightening round. (Glares as though daring anyone to make a joke. Silence.) OK, this is for you two only. Move away , so that there is no cheating. (They sit on opposite sides.) Now, you have ten seconds to list every single cartoon character Casey Kasem has ever played, starting...now! (Ten seconds goes by. They scribble furiously.) Let's see your lists. You both have Shaggy from "Scooby Doo," Robin from "Challenge of the Superfriends," and Alexander from "Josie and the Pussycats." Only Shrapnel has him as Flakey Flakem from "Tiny Toon Adventures!" Shrapnel wins reward! (He cheers.) Autobotopea, you chose which campsite your new, combined tribe will have. (Autobotpea confer.)

Shrapnel: We are keeping ours, ours!

Starscream: No throne.

Jeff: I guess that settles it. Decepticonniption, you go back with Autobotopea. Your things will be there, as well as a surprise. Try to have a tribe name decided. Shrapnel, are you ready?

Shrapnel: Jeff, Jeff?

Jeff: Yes.

Shrapnel: Although I have earned it, earned it, I would like everyone to be able to see their videos, videos.

Jeff: I see. That would completely negate the reward challenge.

Shrapnel: It would be a boost for morale, morale. (Jeff shakes his head.) I'll eat your stupid hat if you don't, don't.

Jeff: I see. Well, I guess there's no problem with your way. (Invisible hands turn on TV, all get to see their messages.)

(Commercial break: ENERGIZER BATTERIES ARE THE BEST! NO! PUT DOWN THE MEIJER BRAND ONES THAT COST LESS! STOP! I MEAN IT!)

(Shots of the new tribe walking together through the jungle, arguing over the name.)

Grimlock: ME GRIMLOCK WANT TO BE CALLED THE SUPERPECKERS!

Starscream: I am NOT naming my tribe after your stupid pet chicken!

Megatron: Who said it was YOUR tribe?

Starscream: Fearless leader, no one but you prefers 'Meggy's Minions.'

Megatron: ARGH! (Chases Starscream through the jungle.)

Optimus Prime: (High School Guidance Counselor, new buff wrapped around arm.) The minute we merged I cornered Mirage and told him what happened over at Decepticonniption. He and I talked strategy while Motormaster and Scrapper sang Korn tunes and Shrapnel and Rumble ran ahead to see what Megatron would do to Starscream.

Grimlock: (Rocket Scientist, new buff worn as tube top.). (Whispering, face close to the camera a la Blair Witch.) me grimlock follow behind them and hear them talk. they want to vote off megatron. me grimlock say, duh! they do not ask me grimlock for help, so me grimlock tell motormaster and shrapnel. we tell starscream.

Rumble: (Offscreen of Optimus and Mirage's talk) Hey guys! Come look at what they left us!

(Shots of great spread, more energon than ever, even new blankets. Too many shots of robots getting over-energized. They are all laying on the ground, lounging against each other.)

Scrapper: If we were going to prove we've combined the tribe, why don't we take the names we have and put them together, like they did in "All Star Survivor"?

Starscream: Chabogamogo?

Motormaster: Autobotonipption?

Shrapnel: Decepticonopea?

Grimlock: BOTCON?

Everyone else: (They look at each other.) Yeah. I like that. Why not? Beats Superpecker.

(Sun sets, another full moon. How, I don't know. All of BotCon is sitting at the fire. Grimlock is telling a story.)

Grimlock: THEN SHE CAME INTO THE KITCHEN!

Starscream: So?

Grimlock: DID ME GRIMLOCK MENTION SHE WAS DEAD?

Starscream: No!

Shrapnel: C'mon Grimlock, Grimlock! I've coughed up scarier stuff than that, that!

Megatron: What kind of story do you have?

Shrapnel: What do you know about El Cupacabra, Chupacabra?

Mirage: "The goat-sucker?" I thought that was you Insecticons.

Shrapnel: No, no! We don't eat organic, organic!

Grimlock: TELL US ABOUT THE RABBITS!

Megatron: Too scary!

Motormaster: I've got a better one!

Scrapper: Too bad, Mine is best: It is the year 2005...(He proceeds to tell the entire "Transformers: The Movie" script, minus the stupid score, using people instead of robots. Spike and Bumblebee are interchangeable.)

Starscream: That is the worst story I've ever heard!

Optimus Prime: It scared me.

Megatron: The very idea of Orson Wells consuming the Universe would scare anyone. Scrapper, I don't appreciate some of your casting choices. Leonard Nemoy?

Scrapper: Well, I've always been a Trekkie. Have you seen the third movie, 'The Search for Spock?'

Megatron: Yes. The fourth one was better.

Starscream: The Next Generation was my favorite. 'First Contact' was the best!

Scrapper: No way!

Mirage: Guys, guys, we've discussed this to death already! Can we get back to the scary stories?

Motormaster: It's my turn! (No one argues.) OK, here it is, this is sort of like Scrapper's, but it isn't...(Everyone is glaring.) OK. Humans write BAD stories about us for fun.

Starscream: What sort of stories?

Motormaster: Well, I haven't read any myself, but my best friend in high school knew people who would write stories in which you (points to Optimus Prime) are Jewish, you two (Megatron and Starscream) are lovers-

Megatron and Starscream: WHAT!

Motormaster: Grimlock is dumber than a post-

Grimlock: NOT FEASIBLE.

Motormaster:-You are completely forgotten because Hook is the brains of the outfit.

Scrapper: No way!

Motormaster: AND...Mirage has a sister who's a total klutz.

Rumble: He DOES.

Motormaster: Oh yeah. My point was that people write about us having different personalities, girlfriends, and twins.

Starscream: There's no way.

Megatron: No intelligent individual would accept this as anything less than an urban legend.

Grimlock: ME GRIMLOCK WANT REFUND!

Optimus: That's it! I'm going to bed.

Shrapnel: You should have let me tell you about El Chupacabra, Chupacabra.

DAY TWENTY-TWO

Megatron: (Psychology Professor, his buff is wrapped around his neck with his necklace) I would not admit this to anyone but two million television watchers but...I'm glad Starscream's back. (Shots of them at the fire.) I have someone to yell at again. He also helps entertain us.

(The tribe is all painting the flag. There is no theme, it's nine different pictures surrounding the name BOTCON.)

Starscream: I don't want to!

Motormaster: Do it!

Starscream: (Sighs.) Fine.

Megatron: One, two, three, four-

Motormaster, Grimlock, Optimus Prime, Megatron: (In perfect harmony) A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way, A-wheem A-way.

Starscream: In the jungle the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight. In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight...

Rumble: (soprano) Aaaaaaaaaahhhh.

Shrapnel: (Plumber, buff is chewed up in a corner as he wraps it around his arm.) This whole tribe seems to think this is summer camp, camp! I don't mind Megatron's singing, singing: whatever makes him a happy Decepticon, con. What makes me lose my appetite is Optimus Prime's belief he will triumph, triumph!

DAY TWENTY-THREE: IMMUNITY CHALLENGE

(Shots of Jeff watching them all walk in)

Jeff: Nice flag! Who painted it?

Rumble: We all had a part in it.

Jeff: I see. Who drew the unicorn? (No one admits it.) Well, it's not important. Here's your immunity challenge: An obstacle course!

Others: Boo!

Jeff: You knew we had to put one in sooner or later.

Megatron: Whatever makes you a happy game show host.

Jeff: Because you are now a united tribe, this challenge is for individual immunity. (Gestures to the idol, a necklace consisting of computer chip key chains coming together to show toy Bumblebee/Cliffjumper flanking a GI JoeTM as the focal point. All of them kneel before it.) Please, it's not a holy relic! (A low-flying stealth jet flies by, one that would have decapitated a few players if they had not ducked.) WHAT! Those stupid guys on Access Hollywood will do anything to get a scoop! Where are my lawyers! Oh yeah, go through the obstacle course! (Waves them off.)

(They race through, shoving each other out of the way. Up ladders, across balance beams, untying knots, rope bridges, canoe paddling...they're all dead even until they get to the complicated puzzle.)

Jeff: Well, my lawyers are on alert and...hey! Mirage figured out the puzzle! So did Optimus Prime! And Megatron! Go on to the last part! Crawl under the row of logs to the finish line to get immunity! (Megatron and Optimus get stuck. Megatron is kicking his legs as hard as he can, Optimus is digging like a mole. Mirage is through like greased lightening.) There goes Mirage! Mirage wins immunity!

(Back at camp, there is a lot of wandering around.)

Optimus Prime: (High School Guidance Counselor. Buff is around wrist) I've been talking to Mirage about how to get rid of Megatron. We approached Starscream, since he and Mirage were in some kind of alliance.

Starscream: If we get rid of Megatron, we have the rest of his alliance to deal with.

Mirage: Who's that? Rumble?

Optimus: I've been watching this guy while you were gone. He really doesn't have much of a hold over Scrapper. If we get him and Motormaster to help us, we have a way to take Megatron out!

Starscream: You are right, Prime. We should-(Sees Megatron coming up to them, with Rumble in tow. Starscream raises his voice.)-lose that lumbering moron Grimlock immediately!

Megatron: I see we have a definite plan.

Optimus Prime: Indeed.

Megatron: (Menacingly.) Indeed. (Walks away, Starscream and Rumble follow.)

Optimus Prime: Meggy is going down.

(Switch to camera following Megatron and company. Nobody notices Grimlock walking right behind them.)

Starscream: All I asked was, 'What's in it for me?'

Megatron: You know very well what's in it for you! You promised me loyalty and now I'm calling you on it!

Starscream: (Smugly) I promised you assistance when you asked. That was a few days ago. Now I know a lot more than you do.

Megatron: (Turns to Starscream and clenches hand around his neck.) Your knowledge is only overshadowed by your stupidity. (Lifts him up by his throat.) Talk, Starscream, or suffer the consequences!

Starscream: Prime wishes to usurp you as commander!

Megatron: You are either lying or you're stupid!

Starscream: I'm stupid! I'm stupid!

Grimlock: (Rocket scientist, buff is worn like a tube top.) FUNNY THING. NO ONE TALK TO ME GRIMLOCK. SO ME GRIMLOCK GO TALK TO SHRAPNEL. HE SAY IT UP TO ME GRIMLOCK. I SAY, OK.

TRIBAL COUNCIL

Jeff: C'mon in guys! Have a seat! (They sit.) Now that you are a combined tribe, I bet things are a little different. One of the biggest differences is that the member of BOTCON you vote out today will come back every council to listen to you talk as part of a seven-mech jury. This jury gets the final vote as to who is the ultimate Survivor. Any questions? (There are none.) Mirage, you are wearing the immunity necklace. Do you wish to give it to another?

Mirage: No.

Jeff: That means all of you but Mirage are fair game. Rumble, you go first. (Music gets scary as Rumble goes over to vote. His vote is not shown. Neither are any in the montage. Optimus goes up last. You see him vote for "Megatron.")

Optimus Prime: If at first you don't succeed...get some help. Thanks for the necklace.

Jeff: I'll go tally the votes. (Retrieves the container they put their votes in.) Once the votes are read, the decision is final. The mech voted out will be asked to leave the tribal council area immediately. I'll read the votes. First vote: "Megatron." Second vote: "Megatron." (Megatron glares.) Third vote: "Optimus Prime". Two votes Megatron, one vote Optimus Prime. Fourth vote: "Starscream." (The jet looks nervous.) Two votes Megatron, one vote Optimus Prime, one vote Starscream. "Optimus Prime". "Optimus Prime." Seventh vote: "Starscream" Three votes Optimus Prime, two votes Megatron, two votes Starscream. Eighth vote: "Optimus Prime" (Music tenses up.) The seventh survivor to be voted off: (Shows vote) "Optimus Prime".

Optimus Prime: I've been bamboozled! (Optimus Prime grabs his torch.)

Jeff: Optimus Prime, the tribe has spoken. (Extinguishes his torch. They watch him leave.) Amazing. I don't know who's pulling what alliances here, but the former Autobotopea tribe is two people away from being Pagonged. You better start winning more immunities. Go on back.

(Music picks up)

NEXT TIME ON SURVIVOR:

Mirage tries everything he can to stay in this game.

Optimus Prime: (Shows Grimlock and Shrapnel voting for Starscream, Mirage and Optimus voting for Megatron, and everyone else voting for Optimus Prime.) I forgot that this was an assignment, not a personal vendetta. In doing so I didn't suspect Megatron would fight back. (Sigh.) At least I can be on the jury. Meggy will never have my vote, though. (Laughs.)