Shaun awoke in morning's light. It was surprisingly warm. "Aaahh, the sun", said Shaun. He looked around himself. Their guard, Thompson, was sound asleep. Shaun looked over at Betsy, who was sleeping nearby, her face nearly covered by her shaggy dirty blond-hair. He looked at her fondly. "Oh, Liz, will you forgive me if I try making a move on Betsy?" whispered Shaun. Betsy's eyes fluttered open. "Oh, you're awake", said Shaun. "Good morning, Shaun", said Betsy. "Did you sleep well?" asked Shaun. "As well as can be expected considering we've in the middle of the woods, we've got zombies hunting for us and there are semi-automatic weapons surrounding us", said Betsy. Shaun nodded. "You know, I really love it out here in the woods. Makes me feel as though I could forget everything and live a normal life, a contented, serene life", said Shaun. "It's never a good thing to forget too much, Shaun" warned Betsy. "But I feel as if my head is going to explode", said Shaun. Betsy reached over towards him. They touched hands. After a moment, Shaun pulled away. "I should get some of that food, we should get some breakfast going and then move further into the woods." said Shaun.
Shaun crept into the clearing where they'd hung the food up in backpacks from a tree to try to keep bears away from it, and in case that didn't work to keep it away from the camp. He got the food down and was picking out some things for breakfast when he heard a crack behind him. Shaun leapt up. He didn't see anyone. He realized he'd forgotten to bring one of those damn guns. "Crud", he said. He collected some stuff and then hung the backpacks back up. Shaun came back into the camp.
"Eeww! Oh, no!" said Thompson, who was now awake. Everyone looked at him. "Oh, sorry. It's just a tick. Did anybody bring a pair of tweezers?" said Thompson.
As they were eating breakfast, they were singing songs and having a good time untill they heard a loud growl nearby that made them spill their beverages and jump in their seats. They stopped singing and heard heavy rustling close by. Shaun looked around. They could see what looked like the same bear moving behind some bushes just in the distance. "It might smell the food", whispered Betsy. There was the sound of tearing and stamping on the ground. "It's got food", said somone else. There were more growling noises and then the bear galloped away, dissapearing into the woods. They all looked at eachother. "It just abandoned its kill", said Betsy. Shaun stood up bravely. He walked forward, slowly made his way over and through the bushes and to the spot where the bear had torn at its prey. He looked down at it, then looked at everybody at the camp. "The bear killed a zombie", he said, nodding.
Everyone got up, some screaming, and grabbed their guns. Someone's gun went off and people dropped back to the ground. "HIT THE DIRT!" screamed Thompson. "Everyone calm down! I'm coming back. Ouch", said Shaun.
"I've been shot!" howled a man wincing on the ground. It was the young guy with the sideburns. "Oh, bloody hell! Listen, uh," said Shaun. "Keanu!" said the guy. "Keanu?" asked everyone at once. "Yes, it's fucking Keanu, get over it", he hissed through clenched teeth. He was holding his right leg. He'd been shot in the upper thigh. "You're damn lucky, you could have easy been shot dead. Alot of us could have", said Betsy. "You're right, Betsy. Maybe guns are overrated. I admit, they can be a bit of a menace", said Shaun. A zombie came staggering into the clearing. Everyone in camp, including Keanu, grabbed a gun and fired at it. It dropped motionless to the ground. "I LOVE GUNS AND I LOVE AMERICA!" screamed Shaun, kissing his semi-automatic weapon. It went off in his hand and shot a tree limb off. The tree limb fell on Keanu's legs. "Goddamn it!" said Keanu.
Shaun dropped to his knees. He pulled an American flag out of a backpack. "Where did you get that?" asked a woman with Florida Orange earrings and a blond perm. "Ok! I'll wrap up that bullet wound and let's try to get out of here, ok, everyone?" said Shaun. Shaun tied the wound tight. "We need a stretcher", said Thompson. "We don't have one, though", said Betsy. "Onward we go! Come on, Thompson, help me carry this bloke, eh?" said Shaun, wrapping Keanu's arm around his shoulder. "Right," said Thompson, throwing down the Archie comic he was reading and starting to get up from the tree he was leaning against. Suddenly a zombie woman popped out from behind the tree and sank her teeth into Thompson's neck. "Oh, no! Oh, God!" cried Betsy. "Thompson! Hang on!" said Shaun, accidentally letting Keanu drop on his butt. Shaun heaved up the fallen tree branch that had landed on Keanu's legs and charged forward with it. "DON'T BRING IT ANY CLOSER!" yelled Thompson, seeing the branch about to smash into his face. But as he was yelling, Shaun hurled it up and tossed it down ontop of the zombie's head. "Oh, God, am I gonna turn into one now? Am I gonna be ok?" said Thompson. Shaun swallowed dryly. He wished he could say something positive. Suddenly another zombie popped out behind the same tree and sank its teeth into the other side of Thompson's neck. Thompson groaned. A woman ran up with a gun and shot the zombie at close range, but it was too late for Thompson. He slumped over. He was gone.
Another zombie emerged into the clearing. Someone fired a rifle and after a few missed shots, brought the fiend down. "THEY'RE EVERYWHERE! Everybody run!" screamed Keanu. "What about you?" said Shaun. "Oh, yheah", said Keanu. Shaun heaved Keanu up. "Somebody grab his other arm, quick!" said Shaun. One of the other guys did, and they took off as fast as they could.