A/N: Me again, still pleading for more reveiws. even one word like fab or brill or rubbish will do as long as i have reveiws. That way i know if this is good or not. gets on knees please please please please reveiw people! Oh and the first part in italics is Anakin dreaming.

Firi - Hi to my newest reviewer! Gald you are liking this so far, but in this chapter Ani and Obi's relationship is going to take an unexpected twist. Hope you still like it and hope you will reveiw more of my chapters as they come. Better yet, tell more people about this! xx

Hopeless4life - Glad to see you're still on board and reading away. Padme is really sweet and loving but after this Anakin is going to need her more than ever. Trust me. Hope you like this. xx

IntelEwok - And where have you disappeared to! Well we're back to Anakin's point of veiw and so he is definatly going to wake up. This is what you have been waiting for, hope you like it. xx

I hold her in my arms. Silently I plead with her to stay, to keep breathing. She whispers that same line to me…

"I'm so proud of you Ani."

But how can you be proud of me mom, I failed you. When it came down to those last few moments I couldn't save you. That's all I had been thinking since she said that to me on Tatooine. Thinking about my betrayal and my failure to my mother.

I can feel her slipping now, her energy slowly depleting. Slowly she is pulled from my arms, and no matter how hard I try to cling to her, to keep her with me, my hand's just slip through her. She slips further away from me now, just out of arms reach. I try again in a vain attempt to get her back and this time I manage to get hold of her arm, but then a hand clamps itself firmly on my shoulder and I am dragged away from her.

I hear hr strangled cry as she slips away…

"Ani…I love…."

"No! Stay with me Mom! Everything will be…."

"I…love…"

But she never finishes her sentence, she never tells me how much she loves me and now there is no chance of her telling me again. I let out a scream of rage and unbearable agony, only to be answered by a voice I know all too well.

"To be a Jedi is to renounce possession. Jedi are not allowed to love. You are bound by the Jedi Order."

I turn as much as the grip on my shoulder will allow, looking straight into the eyes of my Master. I thrash weakly against his grip, one of my arms immobilized by pain. I try desperately to break free, but he refuses to let go of me. He holds me tighter and tighter, the pain searing through my shoulder until I'm brought to my knees and I fall into a pit of blackness….

My eyes burst wide open, the pain searing through my right shoulder. I look up to find Obi-Wan standing over me; worry and…is that fear creasing his face? I swallow hard in an effort to regulate my breathing and try to raise my left hand to wipe away the beads of perspiration trickling down my face and bare chest. But to my horror I find that I can't move. Nothing of me will obey the commands my mind is giving them. I look frantically to Obi-Wan, the fear evident in my eyes.

"Master…what's….happening? Can't…move."

And now he smiles down at me kindly, a totally different expression to the one that I had just seen in my nightmare. His voice instantly soothes my fear and halts the shaking of my limbs.

"Calm yourself Anakin. It is merely a side effect of the anaesthesia. Your feeling will return, just give it time. Be patient."

It felt good to hear his soothing voice, to feel his calming presence flow through our force bond. He lifted his hand from my shoulder and moved out of my line of sight, soon returning with a cold compress which he pressed gently to my forehead. I closed my eyes as the cool liquid slipped down my face, dousing the burning of the fire on my skin. Gradually, the numbness in my fingers ceased and my whole body soon followed suit. I reached up and touched Obi-Wan's hand gingerly causing him to look down into my eyes.

"Master…Padme…she…is she…"

"Padme is fine Anakin. She sends her wishes and prays that you will recover quickly. You mustn't worry yourself about such things, especially not in the state you're in at the moment. Now, I'm going to go and fetch the healer's. You appear to have a fever and they did ask me to inform them when you woke. I'll be back soon."

I slowly nod, lowering my hand again and finally take a good look around me as Obi-Wan leaves the room. I recognise it, and I smile weakly as many memories come flooding back. Not all of them good, but enough to bring back a smile. But that quickly fades to a frown as I see and recognise all the tubes and wires that connect with me, and slowly I begin to remember exactly what I was here for. Looking over to my right arm, I find that it is completely covered by a white sheet, all the way up to just above my elbow. Puzzled I reach over and gradually pull the sheet back, instantly regretting the decision.

My eyes widen in horror and I feel sick. There, attached to my nerve endings was a huge, gold, mechanic…spider. Its insides repulsively glaring at me, the gold gleaming in the sunlight, taunting, tearing all my self esteem to shreds every time it glinted. My heart rate soars as the anger and adrenaline of finding the ones who had done this to me swam through me. Angrily I pull out the IV in my arm, causing blood to trickle from the now open wound, and rip of several pads stuck to my chest.

Several silent alarms trigger, and within minutes a team of healers are at my side, pushing me back down to the bed, holding me still with firm hands as they re-inserted the IV and placed everything back. I could see my Master looking wearily from the door, his hand unconsciously stroking his beard.

Eventually, theywearme down into submission and I stop struggling at the threat of putting me back to sleep. I let them inject the morphine and stay silent on the bed, fuming at what had been done. Staring at the ceiling, the muscles along my jaw line tightening, I try and control my anger, focus it into another feeling. But one word was all it took to re-ignite it.

"Anakin….this is hard for you but…you must understand…they had no choice."

I snap my head to the side to glare at Obi-Wan. From then on, something else took hold of me. Some unforeseen force controlling me, forcing me to say and do things I didn't want to do.

"Will I still be able to fight? Will I still be able to be a Jedi?"

"There is no reason for you not to go on living as normally as you have done. Of course, your sabre training is going to be hindered as you get used to your arm but…"

But the rest of everything he says is blurred. Those words ring around my head.

Your sabre training is going to be hindered…

He had succeeded in doing the one thing he had wanted to. He had succeeded in taking away the last bit of raw power that I held onto. My sabre skills are unmatched as of late, anyone sparring me was met with crushing defeat….now all of that is in the past…now I am nothing, a useless warrior….Obi-Wan's Padawan puppet. Now I snarl at him, a new ferocity in my voice.

"So this was your plan then Master."

The images of him holding me back from my mother began to play in my head, her words whispering in my ears underneath the roaring of rage that beat inside me. I continued to glare at Obi-Wan, the confusion evident in his eyes.

"Anakin…what…"

"You're afraid of me. You've always been afraid of me and my power that I could so easily use against you. You're jealous and could find no other way to hold me back. What did you do Master? Did you meet up with Dooku somewhere and arrange this all, this perfect plan to bring me down to your level?"

Now shades of unbearable hurt and betrayal shine behind Obi-Wan's eyes, but I don't care, I don't care how much this is hurting him, it had to be nothing seeing as he was the one who did this to me. Now I sit up painfully in the bed, my voice growing steadily louder.

"You always held me back! You never wanted me to move on! You want to keep me underneath you forever don't you! And now because of you, she is dead!"

My voice breaks and I start to weep, tears streaming down my face, knowing every word I speak is a lie, that everything was my fault, no-one else's, but desperately wanting to shift the blame elsewhere, to get rid of this blackness that seemed to be enveloping me second by second.

"You killed her Obi-Wan! You wouldn't let me have the power to save her! And now she's dead and can't come back. I failed her and its all because of you!"

Obi-Wan shudders before my broken form, I can feel his pain from here, the cold cruel words I speak piercing his heart like a lightsabre. I didn't want to blame Obi-Wan but somehow it all made sense. Somehow the only way I could see this…thing on my arm was to see how it had come about. And all conclusions came back to my Master. He steps forward now to comfort me, but I lash out, catching the side of his face. He reels back and I turn to look out of the window.

"Anakin…I know you must be feeling very…"

"HOW THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL!"

I grab the glass off of my bedside cabinet and hurl it in Obi-Wan's general direction, where it hits a wall and smashes. I glare at Obi-Wan, the fire still blazing behind my ice-cold eyes, but it is quickly suppressed by…blood. Obi-Wan's cheek is bright red, a small cut along his cheekbone trickling blood, innocent blood, like the Tusken's. I instantly feel horrible, the fire turning to ice. I desperately want Obi-Wan to come forward now and put his arms around me, to come and tell me everything is alright, that he understands, that he forgives me. But he doesn't. He does the worst thing he could ever do to me. He turns his back on me….and leaves.

Now I sit here alone, feeling cold, feeling like I've been pushed into a pool of darkness, and I'm drowning. I'm slowly losing control of myself, and there is no-one in sight to help me back.