Title: Things Unspoken
Author: Jayta
Rating: PG18 - may contain some coarse language
Show: One Tree Hill
A/N: I see pink elephants! Pinkz I tellz ya:cough: Um, yeah. You can't have these pills. They are mine. All MINE! Muwahahahaha!
Chapter Seven: Family
"You?" Was all Lucas managed to come up with, as he was confronted with the sight of the elderly man standing in his kitchen, hand extended.
"I guess that would be a start," Royal chuckled awkwardly. He knew Lucas was not going to be too particularly welcoming - not from the impression Karen gave him. In fact, he got the impression that she had not given Lucas the slightest clue about their involvement in his life - whether it was just inquisitive letters to the exchange of photographs. "Uh, yeah. You can call me Royal."
"I could call you a hell of a lot of other things too," he said, trying to remain calm. How dare the man just walk into his home and believe that everything would just be...normal. "Get out."
"Look, son, I'm not here to cause any trouble," Royal said slowly. "I want you to know that your mother knows I'm here, so I'm not breakin' an' entering or anything."
"Don't bring up my mother or call me 'son'." Lucas wanted nothing more than to throw the man out on his ass. In fact he would like to have called him that to his face. "You have no right to even be here," he spat. "After what you and your whole family has put me and my mother through...you're lucky I didn't just cold cock you when you showed your face."
Royal should have known Lucas would have come at him with hostility. But he had hoped...
"And what are you talking to my mom for?"
"Look, Lucas, I know our family hasn't done anything to welcome you..."
"Oh that's just rich."
"But it isn't as bad as we've let you believe," Royal finished. "We...we have a lot to talk about."
"And I'm saying I don't want to listen," Lucas said, opening the kitchen door. He didn't want to hear him. Not right now...maybe not ever. Here he had always wanted answers, but right now, as Royal Scott stood in his kitchen, he could have cared less. He wanted him out of his house - his home. A safe place his mother had made for him all of those years ago. "So you can go now."
Royal let out a ragged sigh. He had hoped it would go better than this. He had hoped the kid would keep an open mind. But like his father, he had a stubborn streak. Too much like your father for your own good. "I'll go," he said finally. "But I'm coming back, Lucas. You know why?"
"Why?" he said dryly, while rolling his eyes.
"Because we're family. We've done a damn good job pretending we're not, but we are."
>>>
"You think it'll go badly?" Karen asked, biting her bottom lip.
"Well, uh yeah, Karen." Haley couldn't believe she was asking that. Karen had to know what Lucas went through without any extended family, other than Keith. And he had been more like a father than an uncle. "I think he'll react horribly to this sudden change of heart from a grandfather who wanted nothing to do with him for 17 years," she scoffed, placing the last of the dirty dishes into a dishpan. "Wouldn't you?"
"I guess." Part of her hoped he would. Karen gave the okay because part of her hoped Lucas would rebuff Royal's advances, and then the possible questions might subside. But in her heart, she knew it wouldn't. It would only raise more questions. And the day that she thought would never come, came. She was faced with the reality that Lucas needed to know exactly what happened with Dan and May and Royal.
"K-Karen," Haley stammered, as she lugged the grey dishpan over to the counter. "Can...can I ask you something?"
Karen did not like the beginnings of this conversation. "Sure," she said tentatively. "What is it?"
"The other day, I was on the other side of town, and I saw your car over at Royal's house." Haley watched as Karen seemed cautious about her reaction as to what was being said. She had wanted to push it aside. In fact, she hadn't told Nathan yet. However, with Karen's announcement that she has given Royal permission to try to connect with Lucas, there didn't seem any other way to avoid it. "And," she said uneasily. "I was just wondering why you seem to pretend that the Scotts wanted nothing to do with Lucas, while you're in cahoots with the guy?"
And BAM, there it was. Karen felt like she was hit with a ton bricks. She had no idea this was the sort of question she would be asked by Haley James...Scott. Nathan. Haley was married to Nathan now. "Haley," Karen hedged, busying herself by cleaning the coffee maker. "You...you just can't ask me something like that."
"I-I know," Haley fumbled, as the blood was rushing to her cheeks. "You can tell me to mind my own business. But Karen..." The image of Lucas' 12-year old defeated face flashed before her. "He's gonna find out."
"You don't know what's going on here," she said, her words jumbling together. "Things aren't black and white. You have to understand that keeping Royal and May out of Lucas' life was not my decision. I mean, I didn't know that they wanted into his life until later."
"Then who's decision was it?" asked a familiar voice.
"Nathan." Haley and Karen spoke in unison.
"Yeah, me - the other grandson." He slipped through the swinging doors of the back room. "Who people seem to be keeping secrets from," he said darkly, his eyes meeting Haley's. "As well as Lucas."
"Nate," Haley began, reaching out to her husband, who turned his back on her.
"I knew something was up," he said, locking eyes with Karen. "You...you were acting weird the day we came back from my grandmother's funeral."
"Nathan," Karen said, trying to gather her thoughts. "I-I don't know how to tell you..."
"What? Spit it out!"
Haley jumped at his sudden outburst of anger. "Nathan, just calm down."
"Why?" He spun around and glared at his wife - the one person who he was supposed to be able to trust. "People are lying to my face and everywhere I turn I get more lies!" he said accusingly. "How else am I supposed to react?"
"I'm sorry Nathan," Karen apologized softly. These boys had been put in the middle of something that they hadn't signed up for. Dan put them in this position.
"Sorry isn't good enough," he huffed. "JUst tell me why my grandmother and Royal led me to believe that he hated Lucas as much as Dan does. That's all I want to know!"
"I'm sorry," she repeated herself. "But I can't do that."
"What?"
"Nathan, I have to talk with Lucas before anything else."
"Because I'm not your kid, you're just going to leave me hanging like this?" Nathan was in disbelief. "You're kidding me, right?" he said incredulously.
"Nathan," Haley said softly. "She kind of has a point?"
"What?" Nathan felt like he was in a parallel dimension. He couldn't believe Haley was siding with Karen on this. "You're going to take her side?" he exclaimed. She tried to comfort him, but he pushed her hand away. "Don't.
"This is a bunch of B.S." Pushing off the counter, he spun around on his heel and walked out the front door.
"Nathan!" Haley, slightly torn, glanced back at Karen, who seemed quite distraught, before turning and trailing after her husband. "Wait!"
>>>
"Lucas, we have to talk."
He had been waiting for her to get home from the cafe for the past couple of hours. It was good because it gave him enough time to cool off from his encounter with Royal. "I think we do, too." He spun around in his chair to face his mother, who was standing in the doorway of his room.
"What's got you in such a mood?" she asked curiously.
"Well, it might have to do with the guy I found standing in our kitchen when I got home this afternoon," he said irritably. "Since, you know, I didn't expect to meet my grandfather right then and there."
"What?" Karen's eyes widened. She had not expected for Royal to show up at their house right after their discussion at the cafe. "Royal was here?" she asked anxiously. "What did he say?"
"Not much after I asked him to leave." He could feel the heat rush to his face again, as he remembered the almost non-chalant attitude Royal presented him with. It was like he should have somehow been excited or something...
"How bad was it?" she asked, almost wincing at the thought.
"How could you, Mom?" he exclaimed in disbelief. "He said that you gave him permission? What is that?"
"Well, Lucas," Karen said slowly, biding her time as she made herself comfortable on his bed. "There's some stuff we need to talk about."
"What stuff?"
"We've got to talk about what happened when Dan gave up custody of you, when you were a baby." She felt waves of nausea flow over her. She didn't know what to say. It wasn't as if she had lied to him. She just hadn't told him the whole story.
"What is there to tell?" Lucas frowned. "I already know that Dan wanted custody, we've been through that. I know you just wanted to protect me. And I think we all can see why."
"Yes, but there's a little more...involving your grandparents."
"What about them?"
"After I told Dan that there would be no joint custody, there were months where Dan's parents seemed to ignore you." Karen began rubbing her hands, trying to get rid of this nervous energy that was building up inside of her. What were the right words? How did she explain that she kept the knowledge that his grandparents did not actually disown him like Dan did? "Well, they sent me letters," she explained. "And they asked about how you were and for pictures."
Lucas was trying to register this. All of his life, his father had ignored him, pretended that he didn't exist - like he was gum stuck to the bottom of his shoe; he had assumed Dan's parents felt the same way about him. And his mother had never led him to believe otherwise.
"Royal and May...they acted like they felt the same way," she said, trying to explain the situation. "And I never received any phone calls. They ignored me, like they had never met me...What else was I supposed to think?"
"Something else...when they started to send you letters," Lucas exclaimed angrily. He had never known his mother to be a duplicitous woman, but right now, it was like talking to a stranger. "What else did you keep from me?"
"Nothing!" Karen wished the room could swallow her whole. She hated the look in her son's eyes right now. It was like he hated her. It was the look she had seen him give Dan a million times over. "I swear to you," she said, raising her right hand. "I've ever only kept this a secret because I thought they would hurt you the same way Dan has."
"More than you have right now, Mom?" He had no idea what to think about his grandparents now. In fact, he would never ever get to form any opinion about his grandmother. She was dead. He saw her grave. That was all he knew about her. "How could you do this to me?" he asked angrily. "How could you keep this from me?"
"They never ever came to see you, Lucas. For all I knew, the photos and letters were all they wanted to know about you. And what would that have gotten either of us?" she argued. "Did you want to know you had grandparents who wanted to know what you looked like, how your grades were going; but hey, they don't want to actually know you."
Right now he couldn't hear any of it. All that was running through his mind right now was the absolute fool he made of himself in front of his grandfather, the fool he made out of his grandfather. A man who seemed to at least acknowledge him...sort of.
It was way too much. He couldn't handle it. His mind was a blur of words and opinions he had overheard or even said about his grandparents over the years. They are just like Dan. Forget about them, you don't need them. "I have to get out of here," he said out loud.
"Lucas, wait," Karen stood up, in an attempt to stop him, "Let's just talk this out."
"What else is there to talk about?" he spat. "You lied to me again. And here I am again trying to figure out what semblance of my life I've pieced together is actually true, and who are the people in my life that I can actually believe and trust."
Karen could only watch him walk out the door. She had never seen that look of disappointment or hurt in his eyes - it pained her more than she could say to know that it was her own fault. If only I had never met Dan. Him or his entire family. She let out a loud sigh as she sunk back down onto Lucas' bed.
But looking around the teenage boy's room, she knew she would never regret it because it had given her Lucas.
>>>
Nathan pounded the leather ball hard into the pavement of the Rivercourt, meticulously running through years of ball-handling drills to improve hand-eye coordination. The clear, salty droplets of sweat, slowly trickled down his forehead and down his face - unnoticed by him. Haley had tried to talk with him, reason with him, and possibly comfort him after the revelation at Karen's cafe; but he didn't want any of it. He just needed to be alone. He needed time to think.
As always, he was in his own world, as he weaved the ball between his legs, around his body and back between his legs; it was his place to run to, even if it didn't exist on a physical plane. The methodic and rhythmic sound of the ball on the even pavement soothed him, like a child's lullaby. It was here that he was able to sort through his problems - here where he could be in control.
Suddenly the tempered, dissonant song of a competing drumming beat crashed into his world. Another unfamiliar rhythm of leather hitting the pavement. An irregular beat - almost sporadic and abandoned in its' rhythm - encroached upon the borders of the Rivercourt. "What are you doing here?" He recognized Lucas' voice instantly. It was rough and ragged, like he had been running a marathon, only to come to the Rivercourt, his home territory.
"What does it look like?" he asked irritably, while holding up the orange ball. "Figure it out, genius."
"Hey, what's your problem?" Lucas stepped up, shrugging the hood of the familiar grey shroud, Nathan had seen him wear a thousand times. He had one of his own, given to him by Uncle Keith - it was like brand new in his closet somewhere.
"Hey, you know what?" Nathan stepped up into Lucas' face. "I was here first."
"Oh that's right, Dan never taught you how to share."
"You know what?" He shoved his basketball into Lucas's gut, "Shut up!"
"Do you wanna go?" Lucas shoved him a couple of steps back.
Nathan was so ready to pound him, but something held him back.
"C'mon!" He watched as Lucas raised his hands in the air, posturing like some ghetto boy. He looked ridiculous.
You're mad. Pound him into the ground. But all Nathan could do was burst out laughing. He couldn't help it. "I'm sorry," he apologized between chuckles. "You're just so not black."
Lucas seemed caught off guard by his reaction. He looked like he wanted to strangle Nathan. "You just wish you were as cool as me," he spat, tossing the basketball to him.
"Yeah, that's it." Nathan raised a skeptical brow. And they both broke out laughing.
"Sorry man," Lucas sighed, picking up his own ball and sliding underneath him so he could perch on it. "It's been a rough night."
"Yeah, I assume Karen talked to you?"
"Yeah," he frowned, "how did you know?"
"Had a little run in with her myself," Nathan said softly. "But it really wasn't her that pissed me off so much."
"What would she have done to piss you off?"
"Well, that little talk you had with her tonight?" He lifted the ball towards the hoop and shot. "Well, let's just say I kind of had a preview of the coming attractions," he said, jogging ahead to retrieve his basketball. "But she wouldn't explain anything else to me."
"I don't understand?"
"Look Lucas," Nathan paused, resting the ball against his stomach. "I thought I had pretty much everything figured out, like you did. I thought all the Scott's, with the exception of Keith, hated you. That's what they led me to believe and that's what I thought was the truth."
"And somehow you found out that old Gramps didn't actually feel that way?"
"Something like that." Nathan knew it wasn't Karen not filling him in on the situation that set him off. He knew that now. It was the fact that one more thing turned out to be a lie. His whole family was filled with a bunch of liars. There was no one in it that he could trust.
"So you want to hear about my little run in with good old gramps?"
"You talked with him?" Nathan hadn't heard about this part.
"I don't know if 'talked' would be the correct term," Lucas chuckled awkwardly. "I kind of kicked him out of my house."
"Wow," he said slightly surprised. "I bet the old man was pretty impressed with that."
"I didn't feel guilty until my Mom filled me in on what she's been keeping from me, behind my back," Lucas explained. "Then I saw the whole thing from a whole new perspective."
"He get pissed at you?"
"Surprisingly no."
"Just wait until you get to know him," Nathan chuckled knowingly. "It's harder to mouth off to him when he doesn't feel so guilty."
"But you know what?" Lucas pushed himself to his feet. "As much as I am pissed off at my Mom for keeping the fact that they had sort of kept in touch with her, it still doesn't get him off the hook for not being there. I mean, physically being there for her or me."
"Scott men do seem to have the tendency to be pricks." Dan was a prime example.
"So does that mean we're doomed to the same fate?" Lucas smirked.
"Hell no," Nathan exclaimed, passing him the ball. "Not if I have anything to say about it. What about you?"
Lucas grinned. "Not if my mother has anything to say about it."
>>>
"You don't have anything to hold over my head," Karen spat, as she barged into Dan's dealership. "So you can take your secrets and shove them where the sun doesn't shine."
"My my," Dan smirked, leaning back in his office chair. "You certainly know how to make an entrance."
"I mean it Dan," she said, her tone menacing. "You stay out of Lucas' life. And don't you ever try to threaten me again." This impromptu trip to the dealership was stupid on her part. She didn't really know why she was even here. Dan's threats were idle for the most part. Oh, he had a way to tear people down and apart, but they were nothing compared to what he had already done.
"So what are you saying?" He played innocent really well. He had almost mastered the sly, yet naive intonation. It was quite fun watching those around him get flustered by it.
"I've told Lucas everything," she blurted out. "So you don't have any reason to come sniffing around my son."
"So you've told Lucas everything?" There was a slight flicker in her eye - something that led him to believe otherwise. He rose from his seat and around to the front of his desk, where Karen had been standing, and where she was now backing up. "Everything?" he repeated himself. "Because that would be such a responsible thing for you to do. Really admirable."
"Yes," she said firmly. She didn't like the way Dan was eyeing her. "I told him about Royal and May."
"So he knows that you've been helping Royal with his house?"
She flinched first. Damn him.
"Or maybe not," Dan chuckled, slightly amused. "It's all right, Karen. We all have lapses of forgetfulness."
"It doesn't matter," Karen said, moving towards Dan. "I swear, if you play any mind games with Lucas..."
"Really, Karen," he sighed emphatically. "You don't know me very well do you."
"Oh, I know you very well," she sneered. "Too well for my taste."
"I would never do anything to hurt your relationship with your son." He reached out and brushed a stray hair from her eyes. She winced. "That would be just plain cruel and uncalled for," he said softly. He tried to keep a straight face, but he couldn't. He burst out laughing.
Karen just shook her head in disgust.
"You have to admit, that was kind of funny," Dan chuckled.
"You have a sick sense of humor." Karen stared at him, wondering how she could have been fooled by this man. He had been so different in high school. It was almost a metamorphasis. "I feel sorry for you," she whispered out loud.
"What did you say?"
Karen hadn't realized she had voiced her thoughts out loud. But it was too late now. "I said I feel sorry for you," she answered matter-of-factly. "Sorry for what you've become and how you've driven anything good out of your life. Even family - and they're supposed to be there even when they hate you."
"Sorry for me?" Dan could have laughed if he wasn't so disgusted. She feels sorry for me? She was the one with the small time cafe and bastard son. "Keep your sympathies," he said with contempt. "They're better suited for the person you see in the mirror."
"It still chills me that I ever let you near me," she said, as a shiver ran down her spine. She didn't know why she voiced that thought. Part of her wished she had kept her mouth shut.
"You know exactly why you let me near you." Dan pulled her in close, his lips inches away from hers. "Why your heart still races when I touch you," he whispered in her ear.
"You disgust me." She raised her hand to slap the bastard, but his reflexes were too quick; he caught her wrist in his hand.
Their eyes locked. "How much?" he asked, his voice lowering as one would with a lover.
She hated him - loathed him. However, she couldn't stop the electricity that involuntarily shuddered through her as he held her close - whispered so intimately to her. It went against everything she felt about the man.
It had been almost two decades since he had held her - touched her. He shouldn't have been affected. He had taken every precaution to keep her away. But where they were right in that moment - her in his arms - everything went to hell.
Little things had changed. Her scent had changed. She used to smell of chocolate and strawberries; now she smelled of vanilla and cinnamon. Her eyes that used to dance in the starlight, were now clouded. He used to make her laugh, now he brought only a scowl.
"Get off!" Karen exclaimed, finally managing to break away from the hold he had on her.
Her words brought him out of his reverie.
"You really are pathetic," she said, shaking her body, as if trying to shake him off of her. "You think that you're irresistable, don't you?"
"Don't kid yourself, Karen," Dan scoffed, feigning his own disgust. Though he was disgusted at himself for being so weak - giving himself a moment - to be with her. "I've already had you."
Karen walked up to him slowly and slapped him. She couldn't believe any woman would find him remotely attractive. She didn't know why Deb had gone back to him so many times. At that moment, Karen was just glad that she had gotten out then, rather than having to endure...that. Turning on her heel, she got out of that room as fast as she could.
She would have to take a shower after that.
Dan rubbed his cheek, as he stared after her. Even when she was mad, she was beautiful. And that was the problem - he still felt that way. Karen would remain the woman that got away.