EDITED REPOST, 10/23/05 … if you love me, leave me a review about the editing? Geez, not even one comment so far. I feel sad : ( At least someone acknowledge it!

Disclaimers: Rurouni Kenshin belongs to Nobuhiro Watsuki-sama. The end.

CHAPTER 21

"I am going to kill him," Kenshin growled ferociously while pacing like an anguished madman. "Didn't you see what the bastard did to her? And if you looked properly, you would have noticed that it wasn't a simple blade that did that. I can't take this any longer," Kenshin abruptly stopped and whirled around. "I'll be back!" With that announcement he took long strides towards the door. "Oy! Shut up, and sit down. You aren't goin anywhere Kenshin, sit the hell down!" Kenshin's feet shortly came to a stop, though he did not bother to face his grim looking friend. "What are you going to do? Try to stop me?"

If anyone had been standing outside Kenshin's apartment door they would have clearly heard the current quarrel that the occupant and his friend were engaged in. Sano's patience was waning thin. Exasperated, he wretched his gaze away from the shorter man and looked over at his surroundings. No liquor bottle was spared. They sat sporadically on the glass coffee table, kitchen counter, and fireplace ledge. The apartment was beginning to look like the aftermath of a very long party but there had only been two people there within the past several hours. Kenshin has drunk himself into quite a fine state, Sano thought while looking back at his friend again. His red hair was loose and disheveled, his eyes tinged red from the countless tears and bottles he had downed. It was an effective treatment to the pain. Sano said everything he could but did not physically try to stop him. The poor guy desperately needed a break from the crushed reality that surrounded them, suffocating them like a hellish nightmare.

As soon as they had been informed of Tomoe's death, Kenshin snapped. The fine line that separated him from his cautious 'normal' life had been ripped away. Now Kaoru was lying unconscious in his bed with a nasty looking sword wound, heavily adding to the burden he carried.

"You gonna try to stop me?" Kenshin repeated indifferently, looking over his shoulder with glowing amber eyes which were narrowed dangerously. On the borderline edge of completely losing it. "Don't you pull that shit on me," Sano pointed his finger directly into Kenshin's face. He made use of his intimidating height and stood tall. "Don't you start that shit with me, Himura Kenshin. We don't know shit all about what happened with jou-chan. All you can do is run your mouth when that girl is completely passed out and bandaged in the room jus next door. Have some respect, patience, and shut up while we wait for her to wake up. We'll get some answers soon enough, alright?" His words echoed harshly, almost bitterly but he only meant to break through Kenshin's severely stacked barriers. The latter's eyes angrily flashed yellow but he turned again over into the other direction, towards the kitchen, and grabbed himself another large bottle. Sano sighed, and thanked god that his words had sank through— until he heard the distinct melodious clink of glasses tipping into one another.

"Oy! You better not be drinkin' again. That's enough Kenshin!" With his back to him, Kenshin did not show any acknowledgement to his friends scolding. He simply continued to pour the clear, sharp smelling liquid. "Kuso," Sano swore under his breath, deciding to just leave the whole damn situation alone.

"I couldn't protect either one of them. Tomoe's dead." Kenshin paused with his palms pressed against the cool marble countertop, his head cast sorrowfully down. He looked like an image of complete despair. "Kenshin," Sano began gently as he entered the room, "I know. There's nothing we coulda done bout this. We had no idea bout anything, alright? So for now let's just try to worry about the one person that IS still alive after being attacked, ne? Let's concentrate on jou-chan because I'm sure we'll get some answers outta her."

All he got for a response was a very bleak stare. "I think that I'm gonna go check up on jou-chan," Sano quietly informed Kenshin, desperate for an excuse to leave the room before Kenshin inevitably threw another rage-filled fit. When Kaoru had passed out in the hallway it had been Kenshin who was determined to take care of her all by himself. He had asked Sano once and only once to clean the hallway carpet while he tended to her wounds. Sano did not question it at all but deep down Kenshin had felt a stab of jealousy when he saw Sano gazing upon her slight form. It was an un-normal jealousy, one that made him believe that Kaoru was his only. He did not want another man lingering their eyes upon her innocence so he took charge of the situation allowing his cynicism to take over.

Kenshin's head immediately jerked up as if Sano's words burned his skin. "No."

"For Kami-sama's sake Kenshin! I'm just as worried about her as you are! What the hell do you think I am? Some perverted freak?"

He was given an exasperated glare.

"Then?"

"Let me go fix her up a little first."

Sano managed to agree calmly but not before slipping out a weary sigh, an unconscious action that plainly showed that he was growing tired of his companion's attitude.

Kenshin made his way to his bedroom and lost his breath yet again as he saw the beautiful pool of rich black hair that lay deathly still amongst the sky blue bed sheets sheets. He had looked down upon that pale angel, admiring her several times but each brought a sense of awe to fill his soul. Her expression was not at ease giving off the impression that she suffered even within her slumber. Earlier on Kenshin had removed her shirt, and carefully cleansed her wounds before dressing them in bandages. He had left her in the wrappings and her bra but it was unlikely that she would get cold because her skin had felt unusually warm when he had been tending to her. Just in case, though, he had come in every so often and checked the temperature of her skin. His heavy comforter had probably been just right. Gazing down upon her still form cooled his emotions. No words were needed between them in order to feel the effect. Reluctantly though he remembered of Sano who was awaiting his turn of visiting rights so he went to pull a sweatshirt from the wardrobe. Kenshin carefully lifted Kaoru's body, one arm looped around her back while his slipped her arms through. This particular sweatshirt conveniently had a zipper located on the front which would allow easy access if he needed to change her wrappings and by the looks of it, they seemed to be almost to that point. Kenshin took her outstretched arm and lightly met her fingertips with his tender lips.

"Knock knock," Sano's voice called out cautiously from the doorway. Kenshin merely glanced over his shoulder; his trained senses keenly felt Sano approaching so he made an effort to shuffle over. The brunette observed how Kenshin had eerily become tame and quiet, all thanks to Kaoru, no doubt. He wasn't sure if it was a good sign or a bad one because it deeply reminded him of how Kenshin would act around Tomoe back in the day. "Is she still bleeding?" He questioned with concern. "Yes. It has slowed down quite a bit from before though. I will need to change her bandages again after you leave."

A soft groan startled both men. Each in turn immediately drew their attention back to the delicate body that lay in front of them. Kaoru's face scrunched up in pain as she turned her head the other way, but emitted a light sigh when Kenshin stroked her cheek softly with his fingertips, a soothing gesture that Sano observed with silence. No matter what, he couldn't bring himself to forget the words that Kaoru had spoken to him that day at the café.

-Flashback-

"No! No," she repeated more calmly. "I have my own plan Sano. When I say trust me I mean it. I can do this MY WAY."

"What exactly is your way?"

"I can't tell you. I'm sorry," she apologized when he looked exasperated with the situation. "But I can't say anything about it."

-End of Flashback-

It was a disturbing thought to think that she had something to do with Tomoe's death. It was farfetched, maybe, but the determination had been there in her voice with a bright twinkle in her eyes that afternoon. And look what's happened now. Could jou-chan have been involved somehow? Sano didn't want to believe what he was thinking. It truly made him sick especially since Kenshin was sitting right next to him. It can't just be co-incidence, and the guy deserves to know… but I promised her I wouldn't. He accidentally exhaled loudly without realizing it, and that received a dirty look from Kenshin. The other indicated with his hand that visiting hours were now over. He gingerly got up, and headed out of the room while Kenshin started to ready her for the cleaning.

As soon as he was out of sight, Sano shuffled his feet against the carpet with his hands in his pockets. He wished to god or whatever high being there was that he would have been able to calm Kenshin down but he knew that it was much too soon. He also understood that Kenshin was blaming himself but there was nothing he could do about it. I bet he's feelin guilty for not bein there with her, and because he was about to break up with her, too. Kuso, why does it have to be like this?

Sano absently began to pick up the empty bottles.

Megumi had needed him earlier, and he allowed her to lean on his shoulder for support. He was quite surprised to see that a soft, innocent side to her truly did exist. He couldn't help but feel a slight attraction when her warm tears soaked through the arm of his white sweatshirt… or how her distinct perfume lingered on well after she had left. If Sagara Sanosuke had one weakness, one thing that could cause him to fall over himself, it would be the sorrow of a woman. Oh he hated to see them in pain, or to be mistreated. He was notoriously known for being the 'big brother' of a lot of his female companions. However even Megumi did not stand a chance with the battle of thoughts that were insistently brewing, pulling at his mind.

"I can't wait for her to wake up. I need to find out what happened right now."

Startled from his thoughts, Sano turned to see Kenshin leaning against the glass door. His skin was an unusual flushed color, probably from the alcohol, Sano noted. All the black he was wearing wasn't exactly making him look all too healthy. The great fiery flame of hair was up in a high ponytail, unusual because Kenshin always had it kept low, tied near the base of his neck, but the sharp, observant eyes remained golden amber. He looks like a demon, Sano thought to himself while he quietly stared. "Come here," he called out to his friend. Kenshin regarded him suspiciously but slowly took a couple steps, complying. "Why?" he asked, one dark red eyebrow arching to hide beneath his sharp bangs. "Because I'm going to smack you in the head with this bottle until you shut the hell up. Now sit down."

Kenshin gave him a dirty look that could have killed birds in mid-air.

"I can't just sit here. The police aren't telling me anything, Kaoru's knocked out, and you keep telling me to sit the fuck down! I don't want to sit down and relax and wait for a full investigation which could take months! I want to find out what the hell is going on right now! Katsura could have some leads or ideas, even Kanryu." At Sano's angry look he spat out, "I'm desperate! I need to know something at least!" With that same breath, Sano found Kenshin's hands roughly grabbing the neck of his shirt. "Who would have wanted to kill her? She was so innocent…" The amber eyes fell away and trailed down ashamedly to the floor. "She was… she was everything to me, Sano. Who could have done this?" Sano placed both his hands on either side of Kenshin's shoulders firmly and looked him dead in the eyes.

"I don't know. I really don't know Kenshin. I'm just as confused as you are right now but you can't go running back to Katsura or any of those punks. Don't you see that's what they are hoping for? The moment you stepped out of Katsura's mansion he mocked you, and if you turn right back around and head there you'll be heading back in shame. It's what they want. Look, together we'll wait it out until the police gather more information about this. Kaoru will have some answers, I'm sure of that."

"You're very insistent aren't you?"

"Eh…?" he replied, confused, until Kenshin's glowing eyes turned to glower at him. "You're just so sure she has something important to say. Kind of odd that you act like it's a fact when I know her better than you do. Admit it," his voice suddenly dropped several octaves, "You know something I don't."

"I don't," Sano assured him blankly, or at least tried to keep as neutral looking as possible but deep down inside something was telling him that his friend for many years knew that he was lying. Still, Kenshin did not condemn him. Rather his eyes focused even more deeply till Sano was forced to look away uncomfortably.

Kenshin let it go. "What I do know is that Enishi is going to get it. He's fucked around one too many times and this is the last game," he promised. Sano didn't like dwelling on Enishi's fate when he ran into the rage filled red-head. He thought about the two of them for a moment before voicing his contradiction. "How do you know it was Enishi? You don't know that for sure."

"Right," Kenshin sarcastically put in. "You know what Kaoru said to me on Sunday?"

Sano paused and tried to mask the confusion that was slipping onto his face. "You talked to her on Sunday?"

"Yes. She called me, and she was completely distraught. She said that if something happened she wanted me to know that it was by her choice. And hers alone."

A heavy silence ensued.

Shut up Sanosuke. You cannot say what she said to you. Let her tell him later, and if she doesn't then you can.

"Okay, I take back everything I said earlier. It sounds like she knew something about this." Sano compromised with his inner self by giving heavy interest with his comment.

"Kenshin…" A light voice called out and both the men immediately spun around. The seemingly lifeless girl was clinging onto the wall as if it were her last lifeline. Looking like she'd been ravaged and left alone to die, Sano could only stare in shock at her sudden appearance. Kenshin, on the other hand, threw his stupefaction over his shoulder and darted over to her, gently placing an arm around her shoulder, carefully pulling her away from the wall and closer to his tense form. "You shouldn't have gotten up," he expressed his anger delicately with her while leading her to the couch.

Absently Kaoru sniffed the air, searching for the source of that sharp scent that made her feel nauseated. Pure alcohol in an undiluted, unmixed form. Slowly her brows knit together and she brought her head up suspiciously to look at Kenshin questioningly.

Even as her eyes widened like an unsuspecting child's, Sano saw the panic arise in her midnight crystal eyes. They followed down to the coffee table, over the discarded liquor bottles. That same second that she fumbled with her strength and pushed Kenshin away, he was by her side, catching her before she fell. There she clung desperately to him, both slight fights scrunching into his sweatshirt. Her savior stood there, shocked and confused, two distinct emotions he was feeling. Sano gestured over Kaoru's head to the empty bottles that he had been sorting through just minutes earlier on the table. Slowly the surprised expression turned to a blank one as Kenshin comprehended her surprising reaction. Although now it was not too surprising.

"I thought you didn't drink," she accused. He began to try explaining himself and took a meager step forward. "Kaoru—"

"Don't!" she interrupted and backed up against Sano's tough, lanky form, desperate to avoid Kenshin's touch. Sharp pain erupted in her abdomen, screaming at her to stop moving and willing her to stay deadly still. To her it truly felt like she was awakening from a horrible dream. Everything was terribly wrong, and as she looked back to Kenshin, for the first time she truly saw the color of his eyes. Eerie, glowing amber. The color that they'd been when he'd been fighting with Enishi that night.

It scared her.

From everything that Kaoru had heard she knew he wasn't a drinker. She almost wanted to laugh out loud because in her mind she was sending pictures of his signature bottle of water. That was Kenshin, walking down the hall with his books and a bottle of iced water. But this, this was just… terrifying. He looked like a demon from hell set loose upon earth. If that's what alcohol did to him, changed him into an angry fright, she then knew why he didn't do it at all.

Sano cleared his throat, an obvious indication of his growing discomfort with the whole situation. "Jou-chan—" He tried to detach her from himself but she stubbornly held on despite what her painful injuries. "Don't, please?" He captured her sullen blue eyes which had lost their signature sparkle for a brief moment before flicking his gaze away. He was feeling really awkward and with Kenshin's penetrating gaze on the two, he felt like he'd been caught red-handed in a very illicit act.

"What were you two talking about?" Kaoru asked Sano, obviously.

"I was just about to say that I think I should go. You and Kenshin obviously have a few things you need to—"

Kaoru shook her head "No! I just… I don't know! Well look at him!" She pleaded. "Kenshin, you're really scaring me. What's wrong with you? Why were you drinking?" His eyes shut momentarily, and inside he had hoped that she would realize everything in the meantime. But she didn't. "Do you really have to ask Kaoru? Tomoe was murdered, don't you remember?"

Remember…

Everything flooded back to her and she gasped. It was real! Everything was real! Oh my god, I haven't been dreaming. It was all real and Tomoe is really dead along with Kumi-san. It was all too much excitement for Kaoru's still mind. "Kenshin," she began slowly, aware that her words felt like they were dragging on much longer than they really were. Or maybe time was just moving slowly. "I…….have to… tell yo—" With a forewarning tremble, Kaoru's eyes shut and her body suddenly went limp. "Whoa," Sano exclaimed and caught her just in time. Alert at once as he interpreted the signs, Kenshin gestured towards the sofa and Sano put her carefully down. He wasn't that surprised. He'd seen her reaction, the way her eyes darkened but the question that lay unanswered was why? She'd already known the truth; Sano had earlier made her watch the television to learn of the facts but…

"I should seriously go," Sano advised. Making sure that she was okay, he looked to Kenshin as he gathered his belongings and excused himself. "Kenshin, I'm sorry again about Tomoe." Placing a hand on his friend's shoulder, Sano squeezed it and then headed out, exiting out of the apartment. At the sound of the door closing, Kaoru roused, groaning incoherently with pain.

"Shhhhh," Kenshin soothed. Immediately he fell to her side and wrapped her within his arms. "Just take it easy okay? Relax, Kaoru. Take it one step at a time."

"Kenshin," she whispered, turning over to look at him properly but her body arched with pain. Kenshin immediately fetched a pillow from the other sofa and placed it beneath her back, keeping the elevation of her body even. "God, what happened?" she asked quietly while he continued to carry out a thorough inspection of her body. "You blacked out for a couple minutes," he returned. His strong hands felt so gentle against her body and she in turn relaxed. But the bottles shining before her eyes caught her attention once again but Kenshin was prepared; he felt the tension flow into her body and he stopped her just in time. "Stop it, Kaoru. Look at me, I said look at ME," he commanded, leaning over her, their faces barely an inch apart. Uttering words meant to calm her, he slowly brought her back to reality, slowly but surely, calming her and quelling her disarrayed, crazed thoughts. "I'm not drunk, Kaoru. I know you're scared of this but you should know that you are the last person I'd ever intend to hurt, koishii," he told her almost sadly. She believed him, nodding. "I don't know I just… have never seen you like this before." At that he looked away briefly, internally examining his life through before putting it into words.

"I don't drink…" Kenshin drifted off as he carefully helped her back into a sitting position. He took a seat on the carpet, and continued slowly looking straight into her surprised, expectant blue eyes.

"…because it reminds me of when I was in the yakuza. The taste of alcohol makes me want to spill blood." Fear flickered almost hesitantly in her eyes but she pushed it aside. She wanted to hear him out completely and if she showed any serious reaction right now he would stop in order to save her from the pain which was something that she did not want. She had the right to know everything just as he did. It was time for her to know the truth whole and all. "My parents died when I was young." Although he was looking directly at her she could tell that his eyes were beyond her sight as he was looking back into the past, not the present that surrounded them. "I was left as an orphan on the streets. Fortunately for me I ran into a kind hearted stranger who offered me both shelter, and care. He took me in and taught me a secret skill that he knew, something that he had practiced that required to be passed down from master to disciple. What I learned I used for the wrong purposes, though. When I saw that I could make money, have women, and do whatever I damn well pleased I left my shishou, and joined the yakuza. I excelled at the art of sword fighting you see. My shishou was a highly trained man in an unsuspecting skill. I would have to say that he was of course the master of it, but I was highly unbeatable as well."

Kenshin continued on while Kaoru listened with utmost patience.

"Anyone that tried to start shit didn't live to see the next day. I joined the yakuza by the age of fourteen, and killed my first victim two days later." Kenshin looked away as the innocence in her intense blue eyes made him begin to feel something that he hadn't felt about this before… shame. The last thing he needed was her pity, pity coming from someone who had endured a life filled with anguish and suffering. "That's how I also met Enishi," he casually added.

"You knew Enishi back then?" Kaoru sounded both surprised, and taken aback. To imagine the both of them as… friends? Her mind finished the statement off for her. As friends? Hanging out, laughing and chilling? Kenshin and Enishi together like that?

"Yes," Kenshin replied, solidifying it into a fact. Shock hit her and she couldn't find any words. Beneath his tone she could feel the bitterness that lingered still, but in truth it was probably just the tip of the iceberg when relating to his feelings. "He's the one that got me introduced to the underworld. I was 'Hitokiri Battosai', a name that scared even those with the strongest hearts. Grown men were afraid to say my name aloud," Kenshin proclaimed slowly, the pure power that echoed within his words almost caused Kaoru to flinch. "Enishi was there the whole time alongside me. We murdered for money, we took drugs for fun, got drunk almost every other day. I had any woman I wanted." Against the darkening back drop, Kaoru's face went absolutely blank now but Kenshin felt as if he were on a roll. He couldn't stop even though he knew well enough that it was hurting both him and her at the same time, yet his tongue itched to continue, to utter all of his dirtily committed deeds. "I slept with many women. Older ones, rich ones… oh how they wanted to be with the 'Battosai'; the Battosai's woman." His seemingly settled eyes flared to the dangerous colored amber again. "Ha, they were kidding themselves because I never kept in contact with any of them. Just fucked them, and that was it. End of the relationship. Drugs heightened everything from the sex I was getting to the blood I was spilling. I loved every minute of it.

One day I ran into my shishou. Word travels fast when you're involved in that kind of shit. I can still remember what he said to me even though I was stoned out of my mind. I can't put it politely but he meant that he wanted nothing more to do with me. I was never to utter his name, and he went on pretending that I was as dead as my own enemies. I think that's when I started to realize that my life was fucked up. The one person that had been my mentor, a parent to me, was no longer acknowledging who I was." Involuntarily his eyes shut as the memories flooded back, carrying several distasteful images with them. She watched this happen but remained attentive and silent at his side. "That's when the nightmares started. I dreamt of those who I murdered. They haunted me tirelessly night after night until I was contemplating my own death. Enishi knows all about this, like I said he was there the whole time. He knew I was suffering and was no longer enjoying the life we were living."

"You wanted to leave? I bet that wasn't easy."

"It wasn't. Of course you can't just say, okay well I'm finished now. I'm retiring, thanks for everything'."

"Then how did you manage to get out alive?" Kenshin heard her breath hitch, and he opened his eyes just in time to see her shut her own briefly. Judging from how she was biting at her bottom lip he assumed that she was in considerable pain. "Are you alright Kaoru?" Immediately he sat up and his hands reached for hers. "Forgive me for not asking earlier."

"It's alright," she replied in a hushed tone.

"That's a pretty rough wound you received, you know. I want to know—"

"Shhh…" Lightly, she placed the tips of her fingers on the outward curve of his lips.

"We'll get to that. I want you to finish first. I can't begin until you finish yours completely." He nodded, being easily pacified but he continued his story only after checking her wrappings. The bleeding was beginning to slow down and he thanked god for that.

"I wasn't sure how to get out the mess I had created. Enishi was of no use because he was completely against the idea. Sanosuke was for it. He had always been angry about what I chose to get involved with. He may have hated me for it but never once has he betrayed me. That is why he will always be my truest friend." Kenshin paused politely, adorning Sano's name with honorable silence.

"Around the time that I knew I wanted to get out, that's when I met her."

Eerie quietness befell Kenshin and Kaoru immediately knew the one whom he was speaking of. The spark of his life that had been extinguished.

"Enishi had concealed his beautiful sister for so long; I had no clue about her until she moved here from China to live with him. I met her in high school you see." Kenshin nodded as he spoke, recalling the warm memories of his happier moments. "That very first day I laid my eyes upon her she took my breath away. Kaoru."

At the mention of her name he looked up solemnly into her bright eyes. Kenshin was hoping that she could feel his words, understand them as if she were there to look back with him. "She was like no other woman I had ever met. She was the most different, beautiful person." A light smile appeared upon his face. The small sign of happiness relaxed Kaoru a considerable amount. She would have done anything to keep that smile on his beautiful face… but…

"Naturally she ignored my attempts throughout high school but soon after she gave in and we had our first date. Tomoe was like the light that I so desperately needed to see. She never knew about Enishi or I, she had no clue. Even though her brother brought home tons of money she never once questioned where it came from. This may not sound like the Tomoe that you met but she was different back then Kaoru."

Simply, she said, "I believe you."

"Enishi wasn't happy because I had paid the yakuza to get out, and I was also seeing his sister. He threatened me several times but I knew he would never carry his shit out. I was much stronger than he was, although now my sword fighting skills have dropped. I never mentioned this to you but I still try to keep up with it once in awhile. But anyway," he caught himself before parting from the main discussion at hand, "Can you see now why I didn't want you dating that Enishi? Do you understand why I made such a big deal out of it? He's bad, Kaoru. You don't ever want to get involved with someone like that." She had been listening intently but now she found herself looking elsewhere. Her mind was still caught up with the fact that he had been involved in so many dangerous things, not to mention the amount of women he had been with. The past is the past, she scolded herself. Kenshin looks so vulnerable and ashamed but I'm proud that he came out, and told me everything. That's what matters the most! He's a changed person. Many people never even care to re-think their choices or change but he did. He accomplished it.

His next sentence grabbed her from her thoughts like a bucket of ice cold water.

"It was Tomoe all over again with you. When I first saw you I knew you were different. The main thing with you was that I wasn't using you for my own security. I had heard of your story, your history. Naturally I knew about the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, and I honestly thought it was a load of shit back then." He looked to her eyes sharply. "Try telling a killer to his face what your family preaches."

Her movements stilled, her eyes were unreadable.

"Fighting without hurting? How was that possible? I lived to kill," he put in with brooding darkness. But drastically his tone changed again and his eyes seemed to lighten with a new liveliness. His arbitrary mood swing bordered on being absurd. "That was until I felt what your father was trying to prove to the world. It may have been stupid ideology but I understood. I truly felt the words that he had said, the mission statement of Kasshin Ryu. Don't be sad, Kaoru." Upon noticing the slight slump in her posture, he reached a hand up to stroke her chin. "Your father was a brilliant man. My only wish for this world is that his words could inspire everyone and change it to his perception of a good reality," he concluded proudly.

"When I saw you at our university for the first time I was deeply saddened because I could practically feel your pain, Kaoru. Not many people are capable of hiding their emotions, and since being a swordsman relies heavily on being able to read through your opponent, I saw everything that you were going through. I understood what you must have gone through the day your parents died, and the agonizing years that followed." His face brightened considerably, as if given new hope and it reflected off his bright eyes. "I wanted to help you so much that I got caught up in it all. Tomoe had taken a vacation with her brother and during that time I think I began to realize how much she had changed. I'd had time to myself for once after several years and it felt good. It felt right." His gaze shifted uncomfortably from her to the carpet down at their feet. "It sounds horribly greedy of me to say this but I started comparing her to you, to the soft personality that I had deeply fallen for." That received a light smile in return for his kind words but sadly it did not reach her eyes. This Kenshin keenly noticed.

"So did you come to me because I was the only girl around while Tomoe was gone?"

Lips parting in shock, he looked completely appalled at the idea of her even thinking that. "No! Never! I came to you because we were so much alike. I befriended you because I wanted to share your pain so that you would only carry half the burden. I cared about you so much."

A surge of warmth rose up inside of her from hearing Kenshin's meaningful words but when his eyes sparked up again it forewarned he was about to tread on unstable territory. "You don't know how badly I wanted to break Enishi's face when I saw him grinning with you on his arm. I figured that he would try to get back at me someday, and why not go after someone that I cared about. It was obvious he knew that we were close."

Oh you are so right on that Kenshin, Kaoru thought while examining his cross shaped scar. He knew a lot more than you thought.

"Going off topic here and for the record, I'm sorry about the way that I acted before when I woke up. You took care of me when you didn't have to, and I was so rude."

"It's alright, Kaoru," Kenshin easily accepted her apology. It made her heart flutter because he was brushing it off so easily when she could remember the deeply imprinted expression of hurt on his face. "We're both going through a lot of things right now, a lot of unspoken emotions and it probably did scare you when you realized that I had been drinking." A light genuine smile slowly pulled at his lips. "Kaoru, enough about me. I want to know what happened to you, and who did this to you." The tone of his voice changed rapidly becoming something that he rarely showed.

Anger.

"I think that you're going to really hate me after I tell you everything, Kenshin. You tried to help me so many times, but over and over I dug my grave deeper." Both hands shifted upwards to cup her face within his warm, giving embrace. "Don't worry about that. Just tell me everything you know."

Kaoru propped herself up, and took a deep breath.

"I guess I should start right at the beginning."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Oooooh I couldn't help the cliff hanger. I'm sorry I hope you can find it in your loving little hearts to forgive me.

To my lovely reviewers, yes the people that actually sacrifice the little time that it takes to click, and write up a small review, I love you all very much! I will do the thank you's in just a sec.

First off I just got re-hired at my old job so I've been hella busy with that. I'm sorry to say this but updates will probably be sparse from now on as (yes I just mentioned the job bit) but also because with both my stories I got up to the point where I've updated all I've had which means… it will take time for me to write more chapters/ edit/ then post. I like to be a good 4-5 chapters ahead of what's posted up at

Sorry if there's a lot of errors in this chapter but you can blame my sleepiness on that ok? I'm so dead tired; my head is going to slam into this keyboard any minute now. I struggled so much to edit this because I wanted it up TONIGHT, whether it be done at 4 a.m. or 5 a.m.

Gosh with life, it's like everything comes at you at full force when you LEAST expect it. Damn it.

I won't forget about you guys though; The REVIEWERS.

Oh yes I got quite a few this time! Hurray… but you baka's that pretend to be invisible… I see you remember. All the reviews (whether they be negative or positive) encourage me to write more so heck if you want to be lazy so can I. Nya nya:p (sticking out my tongue)

LYN: Thanks… I'll keep on writing more, and more…

luna9871: Thank you! I'm glad you thought that it was cool that it wasn't any of the major characters. That makes me feel good because of that feedback!

Tameka-tanuki-jouchan: Hey you! I'm sorry that I reviewed your latest chapter a little late. My internet was being a complete... yeah you know what, hehe. Ahh so many questions.. and I'm such a cow for never answering them. I try not to reveal too much but hmm… Thank you for your lovely comments! I truly appreciate it!

Sally: Thank you for your kind, inspiring words. When I have a crappy day I'll remember to come look at your review, that's how much it brightens my mood : ) I need some more fluff and angst too. Next chapter… I promised it was coming soon!

kenshinlover2002: I can completely understand that you feel it was a bit…random. I should have established that a bit better though. Perhaps one day if I decide to TOTALLY re-edit this story I will definitely come back to that. Yeah the guy is psycho, and he hated Kumi so it was more of a motive for him to go after Tomoe as well… and of course to screw Kaoru over anyway. His trouble causing part is far from done with…

erica6060: Hehe, well I hope Kaoru doesn't go to jail either. That would be no fun especially for her! Well I guess we just have to wait, and see for what happens next!

Lil' Pup: Hello! Thanks for the explanation on a lemon, and a lime, and no you were not stepping out of line you were only explaining what I asked, which was very kind! Ahh yes the kids at school and their limey-ness. Lol, well it doesn't get any better as you grow older (cough, cough CLUBS). Thanks for your long review : ) Ok well a pre-warning: the um... sexual stuff will be something that I will try to do TASTEFULLY. That should be in the next chapter. Thanks again!

crest fallen212: Ahh I'm sorry to have disappointed you! Hopefully I can make up for it by my future chapters somehow. I will try to make it up to you!

REIGNASHII: Yes computers can be a pain in the butt can't they? Arghhhhh finals! How scary! Good luck with those hon (Sigh) I'll be waiting for your stories alright?

animeguzman: Hello! I hope you liked this chapter! Thank you for your kind review last time! Ahhh… I love Battosai. Don't we all?

Phi-Dono: Holy that was a long review, and I loved every bit of it! Thank you for taking the time out to do that, I very much appreciate the effort, and time you took out to do that! I'm glad that you liked Chapters 19 & 20! I hope that you also like this one as well! Once again thank you for the long, helpful review! Oh and hey I could never be mad at you! You talk so politely, and nicely! Heck, for that matter I would never be mad at any of my reviewers. You guys mean too much to me.

MZ.AMbER EYES: Hello! Enishi is… not dead. Thanks for the review

Ju-Yeon 15: Hmmm I hope Enishi is that sexy. That's how he looks in my dreams though anyhow Thanks for the review Amanda.

anime pixie: Hahahaha, your comment was cute, and funny at the same time. I liked that "what a stinkin cliff hanger chapter". Thanks for the comment on killing off Tomoe. I really couldn't figure out what I wanted to do with her but then it came to me one day as I tried to force myself to fall asleep. Thanks a bunch for the review!

kara mcpherson: Oki thanks about the heads up on medical stuff! If I need help with that I'll be sure to come to you first! Thank you No worries about the mix up on the reviews! Thanks for leaving 'em though!

Xujin: Haha! Here we go again.. Xu… F.F. 8… chick with the boots, navy blue skirt, and jacket with her hands behind her back standing attentively. Hahaha that's EXACTLY what pops into my head when I read your name. Thanks for the comment on the last scene I appreciate that a lot : ) Yes Satoshi will be back for round two… the jerk will obviously cause a few more problems…

Pixel-the-evil-fairy: Thanks for reviewing even though you've been completely busy with school! It's much appreciated! I hope you like this chapter!

RedAndBlackDragon: Lol, me and my damn cliff hangers. Thanks for the review

Immortal-Blood: Thanks for the review! I bet you've been swamped with school as well! Hope you liked the chapter

royal blueKitsune: Fluff stuff next chapter! I promise! Ok! I'm dying for some too. Lol, yes let's combine our begging efforts and try to coax the authoress to write more. It's truly a wonderful story isn't it? God, I just loved it. Thanks for reviewing hon

shibi chibi: Thanks for reviewing, and sorry that this was a really slow update! Hope you liked this one!

Mooing Bunny Rabbit: Thank you for stopping by to review I hope you liked this chapter!

Muaahhhh everyone: x

Take care!