It Would Have Been Fun by Ane Berentsen

Lorelai is leaving her house. Just as she opens the door, Luke comes up the stair. He almost slips, but grabs her just in time.

LORELAI: Hi there!

LUKE: I'm sorry, your stairs are slippery.

LORELAI: I know, I haven't had the time to fix that yet.

LUKE: Don't worry, I'm OK. You going somewhere?

LORELAI: It's Friday night, I'm taking my only child to the lion's den, remember?

LUKE: Right, right, how could I forget. How are the parents to be?

LORELAI: I don't know, I haven't seen either of them since that day when she showed up on my doorstep.

LUKE: Well, good luck. I just came to see if you had some batteries, my alarm clock is dead and the store is closed.

LORELAI: Sure I do, let's go find some and then I'll give you a ride home.

LUKE: Thanks, but I don't mind walking.

LORELAI: If you walk, then how are we gonna' make out in my car?

LUKE: You're right, that could be a problem.

They go inside.

INTRO: WHERE YOU LEAD

Outside of Richard and Emily's house. Rory and Lorelai arrive at the same time. As they leave their cars, they're both on their cell phones, to each other.

RORY: Should we hang up now?

LORELAI: OK, I guess it's cheaper that way.

They both hang up.

RORY: So, first Friday night dinner since we found out about the pregnancy thing.

LORELAI: Yep. This could be interesting...

They ring the doorbell. A maid opens the door and directs them to the living room. Richard and Emily are sitting in their chairs, waiting for them.

RICHARD: Hello, girls!

LORELAI AND RORY TOGHETHER: Hi...

EMILY: Sit down, won't you, Kimberly is getting us some orange juice.

LORELAI: What happened to the scotch? (Rory and Richard both scowl at her). OK, never mind!

RORY: So, how are you feeling, Grandma?

EMILY: I'm fine, Rory, thank you for asking. The morning sickness seems to have stopped.

LORELAI: Wow, I've gotta' tell you, its weird hearing my mother talking about morning sickness. So, are you guys just gonna'...go ahead with this baby thing?

RICHARD (Emily looks down when he starts talking): Well, Lorelai, your mother and I have discussed it, and we've come to the conclusion that we, well, your mother, is going to have this baby...

EMILY: We know it will be a challenge...

RICHARD: Yes, we're not as young as we used to be.

EMILY: But, we'll hire help...

RICHARD: We really feel that this is the right thing to do. Maybe the experiences you gave us, Lorelai, finally can come in handy. We'll try to raise this child well.

EMILY: And we honestly think we can make this work.

RORY (Enthusiastic): Sure you can! That sounds great!

LORELAI: Yeah, I've always dreamed of becoming a big sister. (Not so enthusiastic) When I was like...five.

RORY: Well, you know what they say, hang on to your dreams...

Weird silence

EMILY: Oh, what is taking Kimberly so long with that juice? You'd think she had to walk to Florida and get the oranges herself!

LORELAI: Florida? That sounds like a nice walk. How 'bout we go there tomorrow? (Looks at Rory)

Rory nods.

RICHARD: Tomorrow? Don't you have to go back to the university?

RORY: No, I'm spending the weekend at home. I'll go back on Sunday evening.

LORELAI: You know what, I've changed my mind, forget about Florida, we'll sleep in.

EMILY: Oh yes, Florida. (Shouts) Kimberly, would you hurry up with the orange juice?

Next day. Outside of Lorelai's house, Lorelai is getting a shovel and is about to get the ice off of the stairs when Rory opens the door. She's obviously coming straight from bed, she is wearing panamas and looks very tired.

LORELAI: Good morning, princess!

RORY: What are you doing up? Aren't we sleeping in today?

LORELAI: I woke up early and I felt as if I was... filled with energy! How 'bout later, we go ice skating.

RORY (Yawns): I'm going back to bed... (Goes back into the house)

LORELAI (Runs after her): No no no! Come on, I'll race you to the kitchen, we'll make breakfast together!

RORY: Mum, I'm tired...

LORELAI: I can make you some thawed pancakes...fresh from the freezer!

RORY(Not so tired anymore): With maple syrup?

LORELAI: Anything you want! It's not that often I get to make you breakfast anymore.

RORY: I'll race you to the kitchen! (Starts running)

LORELAI: Hey, that's cheating!

Same afternoon, at Richard and Emily's. Emily is standing in the hallway, holding a purse.

EMILY: Richard!

RICHARD (Enters the room): Yes, dear?

EMILY: Isn't this Rory's purse?

RICHARD: I think so. She must have forgotten it when they were here yesterday.

EMILY: She'll need this, we should take it to her. She can't go back to the university without her purse.

RICHARD: I'll stop by with it later this evening.

EMILY: No, that's OK, I'll go.

RICHARD: Are you sure?

EMILY: Of course I'm sure. Come on, Richard, don't treat me like I'm an invalid, I'm not even four months going.

RICHARD: Fine, you go. Mind if I return to my office now?

EMILY: No, you go on.

Same evening, in Lorelai's kitchen. Lorelai and Rory are cleaning their dishes after dinner.

RORY: So, mum, how do you really feel about this whole become a big sister thing.

LORELAI: It's all right. Better then becoming a big brother...

RORY: I'm serious, can't you just tell me how you feel?

LORELAI: All right, all right, I... I know it's stupid, but I guess I'm already feeling a little...left out. It's like... they didn't have any luck raising me, so they're giving it another go, you know. Trying to have a child who's not gonna' turn out a failure...

RORY: Look, I now you and Grandma are no Thelma and Louise, no Mary-Kate and Ashley, or a you and me, for that matter, but they do not see you as a failure, Mum.

LORELAI: My mother does. I've never been good enough to her. She still doesn't think I'm qualified to make my own decisions.

RORY: Come on Mum, you're exaggerating!

LORELAI: No, I'm not. Let me tell you, if she had like, an emergency or something, there's no way she'd ask for my help. She doesn't think I'm able to make the right decisions!

RORY: What about that whole "Papa don't preach"-thing when she showed up on your doorstep?

LORELAI: That's different! She was too scared to go home, and she didn't know you were upstairs. I was her last option. (Adds, as a joke) Besides, she must have been on something heavy.

Rory shakes her head.

Outside Lorelai's house. Emily parks her car and walks up to the door. She has Rory's purse in one hand. Just as she is about to ring the doorbell, she slips on the icy steps and falls down the stairs. She screams. Rory opens the door to see where the noise is coming from. When she sees her grandmother laying on the ground, she freezes. She doesn't think clearly.

EMILY (Crying): Rory, go and get your mother, I think I'm bleeding...

Rory runs back indoors. Two seconds later she has brought Lorelai out.

LORELAI: Mum! (Runs down the stairs and kneels by her mother.) Rory, sweetheart, call an ambulance!

Rory nods and runs back into the house. Emily has closed her eyes, but she's whimpering. Lorelai starts running her fingers through Emily's hair.

LORELAI: It's gonna' be all right, Mum...I promise you.

In a hospital corridor. Lorelai and Rory are waiting. They have tears in their eyes.

LORELAI: Man, these chairs hurt. Do you think people get healthier if they use painful chairs?

RORY: I don't know...I just know I don't like hospitals...

LORELAI: Who does?

Silence

RORY: Grandma asked me to get you, you know, when she fell. Your theory proved wrong.

LORELAI: Well, my mother always has to prove me wrong, doesn't she? (Smiles nervously).

Richard enters. He seems stressed. Rory and Lorelai get up and give him a quick hug.

RORY: Grandpa, you're here!

RICHARD (Catching his breath): Yes... how is she?

LORELAI: They said she'd be fine, but she was bleeding a great deal, so...

RICHARD (Sits down next to Rory): Well, as long as Emily is all right... I guess it was faith, you know...this wasn't meant to happen. Maybe it's for the best. At least now, she doesn't have to feel guilty about it.

Richard covers his eyes with his hand. Rory runs her hand over his shoulder.

RORY: Grandpa, it's OK to be sad.

RICHARD: It's not like I'm sad – sad... It's just that, well, I was getting used to the thought, you know.

LORELAI: I sure do...

A doctor comes out of a door. He comes up to them. All three rise up at the same time.

DOCTOR: Are you here with...um...Emily Gilmore?

RICHARD: Yes, I'm her husband. How is she?

DOCTOR: Don't worry, she'll be fine. Just a little shocked, that's all. And the baby's all right as well.

RICHARD (Can't believe what he's hearing): The baby is all right?

DOCTOR: Yes, everything is fine.

RICHARD: Emily Gilmore's baby?

DOCTOR: Of course.

RICHARD (A smile appears in his face): You mean she's still pregnant?

DOCTOR: Sure, would you like to see her? Right this way.

The doctor directs them through the corridor and opens a glass door to them. Inside they find Emily, in a hospital bed. Everybody gathers around the bed as music starts to play, and we zoom out.

The end