(A/N: Especially for tomorrow's great première, here's a Super Special Edition. You may commence to wriggle and wet yourself in anticipation. I did try to make it as funny as I could, but it has turned out rather morbid. And sadistic. This is probably because the author is slightly worried about the fate of her charges, messieurs Malfoy and Snape. Worried, but excited as well. In fact, she can barely think or keep still in her chair, so now that this is safely written and delivered, she shall run around town naked, shrieking and frothing at the mouth until one o'clock tomorrow night.)
Chapter Eight: Please, please, please, let me get what I want
Severus Snape arrived at Malfoy Manor on the evening of the 15th to a gloomy scene. Lucius Malfoy was sitting all alone in the middle of the drawing room, miserably drinking absinthe. Snape stood and looked at him, frowning. "What is wrong, Lucius?' he asked. Lucius glanced up at him, an ugly expression on his face.
"Don't tell anyone, Severus, but I'm… worried. The new book comes out tonight, you know." He said, brandishing his glass. "That stupid Rowling! I knew I shouldn't have teased her about her hair when she was in first grade." He set the glass down with a bang. "How dare she put me in prison! Me, a wanted man! The family name ruined..." He growled softly into the dark. Snape snorted disdainfully.
"Don't set store by what she says, Lucius." He said, sitting down opposite him. "For all I know, I could die in this one. Yet, miraculously, I do not seem to care."
"It's all very well for you to say, she made you look good." Lucius said, sneering. He gazed down at the table glumly, then suddenly, the gloom lifted from his face and he looked up at Snape with a wicked look in his eyes. "I say, do you think we could get me one of those Pensieve scenes? It did work wonders for you." Snape's eyes narrowed.
"Yes, and you know I despise sympathy. She spares absolutely no trouble to annoy me." He said, eyes glittering maliciously.
"You shouldn't complain." Lucius said. "I know a fabulous spell for changing texts…" he stared thoughtfully into the distance.
"So you do." Snape said. "And what, pray, are you to put into your great redemption scene? The memory of how the hairdresser cut your hair a whole inch too short? The time my father mistook you for a girl and pinched you? The time James Potter did the old 'let's levitate him and turn him upside down to show his underwear' trick on you, and then chased you around in mistaken lust for a week? To me it seems there is a distinct lack of tragedy in your past. Really, Lucius, you should be glad no-one gets to see your bad memories, unlike what happened to me." He grabbed the glass of absinthe and took a few sips disgruntledly. To his dismay, Lucius began to chuckle.
"Hehehe, yes. That was hilarious though, when Potter turned you upside down." he said. "Hahaha! I don't think I ever had that much fun again." He grinned at Snape, who gazed at him dispassionately.
"Yes, I can imagine it seemed very amusing to you." He said. Lucius rose, and lay a hand on Snape's shoulder.
"Thank you very much, Severus." He said, looking pleased. "You always know how to cheer me up." He danced away into the hallway, laughing. "Grey knickers, hahahaha…" he said as he disappeared into the dark, leaving Snape to finish the absinthe alone.