Author's Notes: Ehlo! I think this is the longest chapter yet…and I wrote it faster then the others. Strange.

I wanted to have a Christmas chapter in time, so yeah, had to get this up before then.

CHRISTMASSSSSS IS COMINGGGGGG!

Excited!

A lot of confusing OOS (Out of story…made it myself) action…may get confusing…do I care? Nope. Lol.

Finally got Dumbledore in. Dumbledore's my favorite character, so yeah, it was nice writing him. Lol, if this were a less demented story I would've made him as he really is…but all my characters are slightly distorted…so don't expect Dumbledore to act much like Dumbledore.

He is God.

So is Rowling.

I consider Rowling kinda like Dumbledore.

Yeah.

I was going to say something else but I forgot. Oh well.

Once again, Harriet has kindly pointed out another error.

It's Puddlemere…not…whatever I said. Lol.

Note to self: Stop forgetting to kill Harriet.

Chapter 11

"Are you SURE?" Harry asked again.

"Harry, leave me alone! I told you I don't have any gold under me!" Oliver Wood exclaimed, incredibly annoyed.

Harry was in the process of upturning the cushions that Oliver had previously sat upon.

"How would YOU know if it's UNDER you?" Harry said distractedly.

Harry Potter had shown up that afternoon at the apartment of Oliver Wood, Gryffindor's past Quidditch captain. The older boy was overjoyed to see his best Seeker at first, but was quickly getting more and more annoyed, for as soon as he let the boy in he had begun asking strange questions and searching his apartment…possibly for drugs. Seems in one year he had gone completely insane.

"Are you sure you haven't had any gold under you, ever?" Harry asked.

"Well…I DID have a date with Paris Hilton yesterday…"

BA DA CHH!

Harry looked disturbed. "That's not what I meant…"

Oliver looked smug.

"…I said gold, not trash…"

BA DA CHH!

Oliver's smug smile faded.

"Well, I guess I was wrong. I hate how Hermione's always right," Harry glared.

"It's a fact of life Harry," Oliver replied. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to play with my broomstick."

Harry's eyes widened. "Nothin' sketchy about THAT!" he said sarcastically.

Perhaps I should up my rating on this thing…

…nah.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"…so let's go over this again. The ghost said there was gold beneath Oliver wood?" Hermione raised a brow.

Harry and Hermione were sitting cross-legged on Harry's bed, going over the clues that ghosts had given him. So far they hadn't come to any conclusions as to why Oliver Wood was not concealing gold underneath himself.

"Well, he didn't say Oliver exactly…he mentioned Wood though…"

"And you assumed it was Oliver?" Hermione sighed. "And why, exactly, did you think the ghost was talking about Oliver Wood?"

"Well…" Harry began. "Well, when it said 'wood' it used italics, and the word 'italics' begins with the letter I, and Irish begins with I, and Oliver has an Irish accent…it all seemed to fit at the time…"

At this point Hermione seriously considered suicide…as do all angsty teens who can't deal with such horrible realities such as homework and mean parents.

It's all so tragic.

That's enough of my biting social commentary…

"Harry, Oliver is Scottish…and plus, that's only in the movie," Hermione pointed out.

Harry looked put-out.

"Anyway, what else could 'wood' have implied?" Hermione asked.

"I have no idea! My broomstick maybe? A tree? THE WHOMPING WILLOW! THAT'S IT! LUPIN MUST BE BACK!" Harry yelled happily.

"But what does Lupin have to do with gold?" Hermione quirked an eyebrow.

"Good point…" Harry scrunched up his face, trying to think.

Hermione looked around the room, her eyes sweeping over the small cigar box Harry was sent anonymously through owl postman. "What about the cigar box? Usually when something random is sent to you it serves a purpose…"

Harry was quiet for a moment, slowing getting to his feet and reaching out for the cigar box. He stopped, his hand an inch from the wood, finally breaking the tense, dramatic silence with one word…

"Nah," he shrugged, walking back over to the bed and sitting down, box-less

At this point God is pulling out his hair, and many, many fairies are dying.

"CLAP PETER, CLAP!" Tinker Bell yelled at the author's laptop screen, which was lying on the lap of that very shadowy, omnipotent author. Wait a second…STOP READING MY STORY!

Stupid fairies.

Harry and Hermione didn't seem to notice the small scuffle in the corner of the room. They were too busy looking into each others' eyes, suddenly realizing that all this time love was in front of their faces and they couldn't see it. They inched closer and closer until…

…just joking, I'm an R/H shipper.

Hermione, being the sensible one…and trying to take her mind off her insatiable thirst…decided to take things into her own hands.

"PAY AT-TEN-TION!" she smacked Harry's face hard, once to every syllable.

BA DA CHH!

"Ok! Stop hitting me!" Harry sobbed. "Must I suffer abuse my whole life!"

Hermione stopped, looking teary-eyed. "Oh Harry, I'm so sorry!" she lunged towards him, hugging him tight.

Harry grinned over her shoulder. Works every time.

Harry's smug grin was suddenly quenched when Hermione wouldn't let go. "Hermione…Hermione, let go…"

Hermione cackled manically, inching closer to Harry's neck.

How's Harry going to get out of this o-

-aaaand for some reason Buffy the Vampire Slayer is playing…

I'm losing control of my own story.

"EAT WOOD EVIL BLOODSUCKER!" a short, spunky blonde chirped, brandishing a wooden stake, and a pretty nice pair of b-

"-OOTS!" poked his head out from behind the author.

Why do random, make-believe characters keep bothering me while I'm trying to write?

Geez, and people ask me why I take so long to write.

Now, back to Buffy.

~*~*~

"…but Giles, I don't understand," Buffy pouted her full, perfect lips, twisting a piece of blonde hair around a finger.

"You never do," Xander growled.

"Shut up, stupid name boy!" Buffy glared.

"You know, I don't have to take this…I'M BRITISH," Giles shouted, leaving the room, books in hand…

~*~*~

I DIDN'T MEAN GO TO THE SHOW, I MEANT BUFFY IN THE STORY. INCOMPETENT CLIP PLAYER GUY! HE'S SO FIRED.

"You'll never take me alive biotch!" Hermione screeched, letting go of Harry and facing the spunky blonde.

Buffy then proceeded to do a number of high kicks. Love those high kicks.

Hermione tapped her foot, waiting for the girl to stop with the karate moves. She checked her watch a couple of times, and by the time she was finished tying her shoe the slayer was done.

"Impressive," Hermione nodded.

"Thanks, I've got a trainer," Buffy smiled.

"I really LOVE that shirt! Where'd you get it?" Hermione asked.

"Oh! They were selling them at Vampire Slayers, it's a very popular store amongst people like me," Buffy grinned.

"Oh man, I wish us vampires had a store like that…all we get are black trench coats, skimpy red dresses, and leather," Hermione sighed.

"Ummm…sorry to interrupt, but I'd like to see less gabbing and more jabbing," Harry spoke up from the bed.

Wow did that sound wrong.

"Oh yeah," the girls said together, commencing the glaring.

"You're going DOWN," Buffy screeched.

"You already said that," Hermione pointed out.

"Oh, sorry…bad writers," Buffy nodded.

She better not be talking about me.

Buffy suddenly did a back flip, dazzling Hermione long enough to throw her stake, aimed directly at Hermione's heart.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO," Harry screamed, trying to take the stake for her…as heroes always do. Unfortunately his legs got tangled in the sheets and he ended up hanging upside down off the side of the bed.

The stake stuck directly in the spot where Hermione's heart was.

"Ow! That hurt!" Hermione complained, pulling out the stake.

"But…how?" Buffy stammered.

Hermione smiled. "I always keep 'Hogwarts, a History' close to my heart," she pulled the large, hard-cover book from under her robes, the wooden stake stuck in the center.

"Smart," Buffy looked impressed.

"So yeah…now I'm gonna have to blast you with my magic," Hermione put the book down on the bed calmly.

"I understand," Buffy nodded, and was promptly blasted away by Hermione's magic.

Hermione placed her wand back in her pocket, turning around and sitting on the edge of the bed. "So…how's about we open that cigar box and see what we find?"

Harry was too scared to speak, so he just nodded.

Hermione walked over to the dresser and grabbed the box, sitting down on the bed and placing it in her lap.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Let's all go to the lobby

Let's all go to the lobby

Let's all go to the lobby

To get ourselves some snacks.

If you just happen to be thirsty…hungry…a bit tired…now is the time to go eat, drink, or sleep.

Alright…NOW!

I'm waiting right here.

Doo doo doo.

Still waiting.

Maybe you can get me some cookies and milk. I have a hankering for some cookies and milk.

Or not.

Maybe some chicken fingers.

Well, I think you've had enough time. Back to the show.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hermione lifted the lid of the wooden box, revealing the neat row of cigars inside. "Now…what was that line again?"

"I've said it several thousand times! Yeesh woman, it's not that hard too remember!" Harry grumbled.

"Hey, WHO was the one who fought the kung-fu Barbie doll, huh?" Hermione glared.

"Fine…below the wood you'll find the gold," Harry repeated the phrase.

"Hmmm…" Hermione thought for a second, suddenly flipping the box upside down and letting all the cigars tumble onto the bed.

"Hermione! What are you doing?! That's Ron's Christmas present!" Harry screeched.

"Oh shut up you rich bastard…" Hermione spat, poking the bottom of the box.

Harry sniffed, wiping away a silent tear.

After a few moments of silent box poking Harry spoke up. "What're you doing?"

"Looking for a false bottom," Hermione said.

"Oh! Just look in any one of those fashion magazines…there are loads of them in there!" Harry grinned.

"Not THAT kind!" Hermione rolled her eyes. Then, with absolute perfect timing allowing for a nice dramatic effect, Hermione pulled out the false bottom of the box. "THIS KIND!"

Harry nodded approvingly. "That was pretty cool".

"Hey look at this!" Hermione gasped. "CHOCOLATE!"

"Chocolate?" Harry raised a brow. "What happened to the whole 'gold' thing?"

"It's a single pot of gold chocolate! GET IT? That's so clever!" Hermione laughed.

Harry tried to suppress his rage through overly-fake smiling.

"It's not that bad Harry…I love pot of gold chocolates!" Hermione picked up the small chocolate. "And it's the nut one! I love how it looks like a little peanut butter cup," she giggled and bit into it.

Harry continued to suppress his rage.

"Mmm, it's good!" she said. "Wait a second…what's this? There's something folded on the bottom of the wrapper…"

Still angry…yet intrigued.

"It looks like…gold?" Hermione choked on her chocolate.

Rage dwindling…

Hermione scooped the remaining chocolate out of the paper cup, picking the golden paper out of the bottom and unfolding it.

"What is it?" Harry asked eagerly, snatching the paper out of Hermione's hand.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hmmm…I think I should do another one of these pointless breaks in the story…I find it funny.

So yeah, peanut butter sandwiches would be good right about now.

Perhaps you must use the washroom.

If so, you better go now.

Go on, I'll wait…

…

…

Done?

Alright, back to story…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Congratulations Harry Potter. You and your friends Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger are invited to the first and last ever public opening of 'Billy Wonks's chocolate factory..." Harry read, holding the golden ticket out in front of him. "Wait a second…how do they know our names? And…Billy Wonks? That sounds a lot like Willy Wonk-"

"ER!" Ron burst into the room, face flushed with happiness.

"Willy Wonker?" Harry raised a brow inquisitively. Ron was obviously losing his censoring touch.

"No! ER! Dumbledore conjured a muggle telem-izon into the great hall and we're all watching it!" He stopped as his eye spotted the gold of the ticket in Harry's hand. "What's going on?"

"We've got tickets to Billy Wonks's Chocolate Factory," Harry answered, holding out the ticket for Ron to see.

Ron snatched the piece of paper from Harry's fingers (much like Harry did to Hermione…cept Ron didn't have to deal with Harry getting angry and going after his blood…), his eyes scanning the words quickly before looking back up at Harry. "Billy Wonks? That sounds a lot like Willy Wonk-"

"ER!" Dean burst into the room suddenly, knocking Ron to the ground.

"Oh not again," Hermione huffed, quite annoyed with all the madness surrounding her twenty-four hours a day.

Dean narrowed his eyes at Hermione, eye twitching. "What are you saying Hermione? I've been in here before? There's more then one of me? Clones? You're cloning me! It's the government! The government is making evil clones of me which they're gonna use to take over the world! And you're in on it! You're all in on it! I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE MAKING CLONES OF ME TO TRY AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD USING MY CLONES! BUT I WON'T LET YOU! I WON'T!" Dean said all this extremely fast, almost incoherently, and then jumped out a nearby window.

"That guy just gets weirder every day," Ron picked himself off the ground, batting at his pants.

Hermione rolled her eyes, the urge to prove how much of a hypocrite Ron was. "Really now Ron? And what if I were to say F-"

"-RIDAY!" Ron interrupted her in his usual manner, looking dejected.

"Game, set and match," she grinned, swinging her legs over Harry's bed and getting to her feet, Harry following a few minutes later.

"So, d'you think we should go?" Harry asked Hermione, falling into step beside her.

"Well it is kind of suspicious. It's obviously some sort of plot on your life," Hermione answered. "But knowing you, you didn't listen to a word I just said and will end up going anyway, so…sure Harry, I think we should go!"

"Me too! This will be fun! I love having a reason to break the rules!" Harry giggled happily.

"But first, I think we should tell Dumbledore," Hermione added.

Harry and Ron groaned.

"Hermione! That's takes all the danger and adventure out of it!" Ron pouted.

"Oh stuff it Ron, you know once we get there something strange, unusual, and dangerous will happen," Hermione rolled her eyes.

She had a point.

"Fine! Geez, let's go see Dumbledore," Harry sighed.

Hermione stopped in her tracks. "Y-you…you actually…listened to me?"

Ron and Harry blinked.

"You never listen to me! ESPECIALLY when I tell you to talk to a teacher and/or Dumbledore about something! It's always 'they wouldn't understand', 'we're gonna get in trouble', 'Dumbledore can't help us now'. I mean, come on…REALLY. He's the most powerful wizard in the world and you think he can't do what a couple of 15 year olds can?" Hermione babbled.

Ron and Harry blinked again.

"Can we go now?" Ron asked.

Hermione nodded and continued walking, still mumbling to herself, while Harry skipped and hummed the words to 'We're off to see the Wizard'.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The trek to Dumbledore's office continued ten minutes later, with Harry continually singing…and skipping…and singing some more.

"Shut UP Harry," Ron let out an annoyed sigh.

The three of them walked the rest of the way in silence.

They got all the way up to the large, ugly stone gargoyle which covered the entrance to Dumbledore's office (or the Griffin statue, if you're going by the movies…which you shouldn't…because the books are better), when they realized they didn't know the password. When will Harry learn?

"Why is it always impossible to get to Dumbledore…especially when we need him," Harry asked.

"No idea, I think we should go ask McGonagall where he is," Hermione answered.

The three of them turned away from the gargoyle and made their way down the corridor once again.

"You know, after five years of being right about everything around here, why is it teachers continue to ignore everything I say?" Harry asked.

"I think it was that incident in first year…when you were totally and completely wrong about Snape…that was a stupid move Harry," Ron shook his head.

"Hey! You thought it was him too!" Harry said angrily.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Ron patted Harry's shoulder.

"You just wait until the next time we're in mortal danger and see if I save your arse!" Harry growled.

Somewhere between the threats and pie throwing they found themselves at McGonagall's door.

"Oh, by the way, is she still a cat?" Ron asked.

"No! Geez Ron, that was, like, four chapters ago!" Hermione said, rolling her eyes.

Harry lifted his fist to knock on the door.

"Harry, no need to do that," Hermione took a keychain packed with twenty or so different sized keys, choosing a small, silver one.

Harry and Ron stared at her, causing Hermione to slowly look up. "What? Teachers feel they can trust me…and what if one day I leave a bit of homework in class?" she explained, looking terrified at the thought.

Harry would definitely be using this to his advantage in the future.

Hermione unlocked the door to the classroom and the three made their way inside, Ron hesitating at in the frame.

"It's okay Mr. Weasley, I promise I won't leave tuna in your backpack again," Professor McGonagall's voice could be heard from the front of the room. She was seated at her desk, books strewn around her.

"Professor! You're okay!" Hermione exclaimed cheerily.

Professor McGonagall nodded slightly, with her customary false stern face. "Headmaster Dumbledore set me straight."

"Speaking of the Headmaster, we really need to speak with him. Can you help us get up to his office?" Ron asked.

McGonagall raised an eyebrow. "And why do you need to speak to him?"

"Is there a point to us telling you, cause you're just gonna tell us some excuse like 'he's not in the castle' or 'he's very busy' or even 'get the hell out of my face'," Harry looked annoyed.

"Well since you pointed out what we've all been thinking over the past 6 years, I'll take you to him," McGonagall stood, fixing her hat and leading the way out of the room.

Harry just couldn't believe telling the truth worked so well. It probably wouldn't in Rowling's books.

Rowling is God.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Professor brought her fist to the wood, rapping, rapping on the chamber door.

Only that and nothing more.

"Come in," a very aged voice was heard from the other side of the oak door leading to Dumbledore's office. Professor McGonagall pushed the door open, closing it behind her with a snap. The three teenagers heard the muffled voices of Professor McGonagall and the Headmaster speaking. All too quickly the tall, stern-looking witch exited the room, motioning for the three to enter.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione jumped as the door closed with a loud snap, standing with their backs pressed to the door, staring around the large, circular room. Harry had fond memories of this place. Dumbledore's phoenix bursting into flame, learning of his impending doom, smashing things…ahh yes, it was a sanctuary.

"Good evening…Mister Bond," a voice was heard from the other side of the room. The kids' attention was directed towards a large leather chair sitting behind a desk, its back facing them.

"Umm…it's the afternoon sir," Ron spoke up.

The chair swiveled around the reveal a very old man with a long flowing silver beard and mustache. He looked at the three of them over the top of his half-moon spectacles. "So it is," he replied. "So. It. Is."

'Improper use of periods,' my fourth grade English teacher tutted, watching over my shoulder. She marked something in red pen and disappeared into the mist to the 'Wicked Witch of the West' theme music from 'The Wizard of Oz'.

"So…" Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, obviously waiting for them to speak.

"So…" Harry said, leaning back against the door.

"So…" Ron said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"So…" Dobby spoke up from his hiding place in the closet.

Hermione took it upon herself to explain the situation. After telling Dumbledore all about the wooden box, the clues, the Golden ticket, and the underwear she stole from Snape, they all stood there in silence.

Ron finally broke the silence. "Headmaster, could we possibly sit down?"

Dumbledore gave Ron a piercing look. "But you ARE sitting, Mr. Weasley."

Sure enough, the teenagers realized they were sitting.

"How did he…?" Ron whispered to Harry.

"…it's Dumbledore," Harry whispered back.

This seemed to explain everything.

All was silent while Dumbledore seemed to be thinking. "Well, I believe that it should be your decision whether or not it is wise to go," Dumbledore began.

"Score!" Ron exclaimed. "Chocolate here we come!"

"However," Dumbledore smiled slightly under his silver beard at Ron's rashness.

"Oh not one of these talks," Harry slid lower in his chair. He knew a lot about Dumbledore's 'talks', considering the fact that he was in his office at the end of almost every year since he started at Hogwarts.

Dumbledore pretended he didn't hear that. "However, I must press upon you the obvious fact that this may very well be a trap. I know, Harry, that you are an idiot, and you enjoy putting yourself in harm's way, but I'm inclined to warn you that there is a very likely chance you will get hurt in some way. I also do not want to play psychologist once again to your adolescent psychodrama. After your godfather's death last year I would expect you to be more careful." The old wizard gave Harry the 'look'. The one where Harry could tell he knew something that he pretended he didn't. Such is the mystery of Albus Dumbledore.

Harry nodded in reply.

Ron looked stricken. "Harry! We have to go! We just have to!"

Hermione smacked Ron across the back of the head. "Stop trying to influence him!"

Harry bashed both their heads together. "Shut up tha both of yas!"

Dumbledore was seriously reminded of the three stooges. Ron would be Larry. Definitely.

"I think I'll go," Harry made up his mind. "Otherwise this story would have no point and we'd be stuck in one of those plot-less fanfiction stories that don't go anywhere."

Dumbledore nodded. "Makes sense, but don't come crying to me if something goes wrong."

Harry nodded.

Dumbledore suddenly reverted back to his old, mysterious, kind ways. "Be careful Harry, and always remember, where there's a will, there's…FRIED CHICKEN!"

Dumbledore pulled out a bucket of KFC and offered a wing to Harry.

"The colonel got to you too, eh?" Harry nodded.

"Oh yes Harry…the colonel gets to everyone sooner or later," Dumbledore answered.

X-files music.

The three students got up, making their way to the door with pieces of chicken in their hands.

"Thank you Headmaster!" Harry called out before the door closed behind them.

Dumbledore sighed, leaning back in his chair. "Oh Harry, when will you learn…" he shook his head, taking a bite out of his chicken breast.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

References to Edgar Allen Poe's "the Raven"…if you hadn't already known what that was when you read the part. If you still don't know what part I'm talking about…YOU ILLITERATE BASTARD!

I'm joking of course *shifty*

Nic- Cleanse the bitterness Nic…cleanse it. Wash it all away. Do some yoga or something, Lol. Wench. JOKING. MAKE MORE PICTURES FOR MEEE! I was kinda confused by your first review, so good thing you posted it again! Lol!

Gred- Lol, your ghetto slang is perfectly fine. Neville would be pleased. And yes…he is French…I was throwing around the idea of Italian, but I don't think squids eat pasta. Word.

Tarawen- Lmao! I love the multiple reviews! You're pretty cool! And I'm gonna try listening to Star Wars Episode II while writing my next chapter. Don't be surprised if I have more Star Wars references, lol.

Backsplash007- Well since I write slower then an armless person, by the time I realized I had no Halloween chapter it was two weeks away from Christmas. And since Halloween is a big time for Magical people I added it in, and am now working on a Christmas chapter. Cause Christmas rocks. And I shall put the translation below.

Venix- Always acting the innocent one. I know you're gonna attack me with Quidditch equipment once my back is turned. And sure, you can have a monkey…your mother promised she'd buy you one and let it stay in her house. *evilgrin* Divorce is fun. LMAO

Perfectly sane girl- There aren't any killer pumpkins…but there ARE killer Brussels sprouts. Why do you think they're so gross? Let's do it this way…you send me 1 million dollars, I send you 10 thousand dollars! 10 thousand dollars just for reviewing! And I don't need toe nail clippers…I use the lawn mower. Very effective. Btw, send me 'slightly homicidal' money when you get a chance.

The Lynx- Damn, did the temperature suddenly drop a few degrees? It's a bit chilly in here…even a bit cold…lol! Fine then, I meant "it" as well! *shifty* *dies inwardly* joking.

Harry/Harriet- STOP CORRECTING ME OR I'LL EAT YOUR DOG…DAMN IT! Lmao! Why must we always fight…*sniff* I really miss Grimmauld! *sobchoke*

Dragonfly-child- What kind of story would it be if I didn't add in Cruella Deville? I square Ron. *nod*

Silverphoenix- *Not going to make fool of self* *Not going to go crazy* *Not going to make people think he's an insane stalker* Ahhh who am I kidding…YOU RULE! Lol! You truly are my hero! You're the reason I STARTED writing this! Thanks so much for reviewing; you have no idea how much that means to me! Woot!

Alright…enough of that…

…HERO I TELL YOU!

Ok, done.

Translation for Squiddy:

J'espère que vous tous les deux tombez dans un grand bol de pudding- I hope that you both fall into a large bowl of pudding

Enfants d'idiot. Je vous mangerai maintenant!- Idiot children! I shall eat you now!

Damnez-vous tous les deux! Revenez ici! J'ai faim! Pourquoi doivent-ils toujours fonctionner?- Damn you both! Come back here! I'm hungry! Why must they always run?

I have a picture of squiddy and of Harry, but I'm not allowed to put URL's on here. Grrrrr.